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Men Sitzpinklers, A Serious Issue
07-16-2019, 04:16 PM
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#1
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 4,172
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Men Sitzpinklers, A Serious Issue
One of the hazards of a very long thread such as Ladies Hovering one is that it is difficult to find the single word you wanted but I finally did after discovering that the topic was not Other, but Health & Early Retirement.
I'm surprised it wasn't mentioned there (or maybe I missed it) but there is a serious issue for men only.............whether you are a sitzpinkler or manufacturing the more conventional dumplings. I am not sure how common this situation is , but I know it is common at my medical center and have on rare occasion encountered it elsewhere.....but never at home.
Have you ever been seated ready to do your business when suddenly you are shocked into the realization that the tip of your submarine has begun its underwater descent...........both the cooler temperature and the liquid make themselves known . If you are sitting upright you may be spared this misfortune but if you are leaning forward, geometry dictates that the angle of the dangle means that the submarine will start its contact with the cold water and whatever traces of predecessor substances may have been in that bowl.
At its heart the root cause must be a design flaw since a robust design should prevent that no matter the size and shape of the sitzpinkler or the water level in the bowl. I am sure the medical center would not rip out their appliances because of this complaint but I sometimes wonder if they could adjust the water level to compensate for the design flaws or whether this adjustment would affect other parameters like the quality of the flush. I am normally the first to complain about stuff but for some reason I haven't done anything about this situation...........maybe because to report it online is not anonymous and I can see the giggling going on when they receive the report.
Googling shows that I am not the only one to encounter this.......the wonders of our modern age.
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07-16-2019, 04:23 PM
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#2
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Moderator
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Flyover country
Posts: 25,346
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Calls to mind a classic joke.
Two guys stop on a bridge to relieve themselves.
As they are standing there, the first guy said "Hey, this water is cold."
The other guy replied, "Yeah, and deep too."
__________________
I thought growing old would take longer.
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07-16-2019, 04:26 PM
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#3
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 8,968
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I'm sorry to have to admit never having that problem
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07-16-2019, 04:30 PM
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#4
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: Tampa
Posts: 11,298
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RobbieB
I'm sorry to have to admit never having that problem
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No snaking the toilet then.
__________________
TGIM
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07-16-2019, 04:35 PM
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#5
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: St. Charles
Posts: 3,915
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Sounds like a (not so) humble brag, to me.
__________________
If your not living on the edge, you're taking up too much space.
Never slow down, never grow old!
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07-16-2019, 04:45 PM
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#6
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 8,409
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An extremely carefully and well worded post, but I cant believe this forum has sunk to this![emoji23][emoji23]
__________________
Living well is the best revenge!
Retired @ 52 in 2005
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07-16-2019, 04:50 PM
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#8
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Administrator
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 40,706
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marko
An extremely carefully and well worded post, but I cant believe this forum has sunk to this![emoji23][emoji23]
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I think the thread topic is very shallow
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07-16-2019, 04:54 PM
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#9
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 2,525
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Me thinks this problem can be easily solved by some minor surgery. Remove a few inches and there - no more problem!
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07-16-2019, 05:19 PM
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#10
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 8,968
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I looked at the "12 inch" toilet and thought the logs will splash plenty from a foot up.
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07-16-2019, 05:46 PM
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#11
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Conroe, Texas
Posts: 18,727
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It's either a seat height problem or a water level one.
Increase the distance between the top of the seat and the water level enough to keep your parts dry.
__________________
*********Go Yankees!*********
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07-16-2019, 06:11 PM
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#12
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 35,712
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ejman
Me thinks this problem can be easily solved by some minor surgery. Remove a few inches and there - no more problem!
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I was also thinking that the surest way to solve a problem is to hack at its root.
__________________
"Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man" -- Leon Trotsky (1879-1940)
"Those Who Can Make You Believe Absurdities Can Make You Commit Atrocities" - Voltaire (1694-1778)
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07-16-2019, 07:20 PM
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#13
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Chattanooga
Posts: 3,893
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Hopefully this thread will peter out quickly. But to the OPs question, I've tickled the porcelain on occasion but never bopped the battle apple.
__________________
Earning money is an action, saving money is a behavior, growing money takes a well diversified portfolio and the discipline to ignore market swings.
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07-16-2019, 07:23 PM
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#14
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 8,968
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I would think that as we age, it might be the jewels hangin' in the drink?
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07-17-2019, 05:37 AM
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#15
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 11,327
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RobbieB
I would think that as we age, it might be the jewels hangin' in the drink?
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Ugh, I can't un-see that.
__________________
Idleness is fatal only to the mediocre -- Albert Camus
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07-17-2019, 05:58 AM
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#16
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Feb 2019
Posts: 117
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Quote:
Originally Posted by braumeister
Calls to mind a classic joke.
Two guys stop on a bridge to relieve themselves.
As they are standing there, the first guy said "Hey, this water is cold."
The other guy replied, "Yeah, and deep too."
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Speaking of jokes....
Did you hear about the guy who was attacked by the group of mimes?
They did unspeakable things to him!
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07-17-2019, 06:15 AM
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#17
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gone traveling
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: NW Ohio
Posts: 1,156
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If your sitzpinkler has enough length to become a submarine, you may want to research becoming an adult film star.
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07-17-2019, 07:33 AM
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#18
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 4,172
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ckelly78z
If your sitzpinkler has enough length to become a submarine, you may want to research becoming an adult film star.
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.........................actually, this reasoning illustrates faulty logic IMHO.
As noted by others previously, the disturbing event is simply comparing the relative dimensions of two things. Either one is abnormally long or the other is abnormally short or perhaps some combination of both. Since I am not claiming any 6 sigma statistics of my own, I would suggested that the offending toilets are the problem. This seems to be supported by the relative frequency at my medical institution and the relative infrequency elsewhere.
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07-17-2019, 07:41 AM
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#19
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gone traveling
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: DFW
Posts: 7,586
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This reminds me of the old joke, two guys next to each other at the urinals, one says softly, "the water is cold this morning"
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07-17-2019, 08:13 AM
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#20
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 35,712
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Ummm...
On 2nd thought, amputation is a bit extreme.
How 'bout this?
Tie it into a knot for shortening, but make the knot loose to avoid restricting circulation.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ejman
Me thinks this problem can be easily solved by some minor surgery. Remove a few inches and there - no more problem!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NW-Bound
I was also thinking that the surest way to solve a problem is to hack at its root.
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__________________
"Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man" -- Leon Trotsky (1879-1940)
"Those Who Can Make You Believe Absurdities Can Make You Commit Atrocities" - Voltaire (1694-1778)
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