When to fire your PCP?

[SheitlQueen]

After a couple visits it's time to move on. I had one that had terrible bedside manner, final straw was when he made a snide comment about how I hadn't listened to what he had just told me when I asked a question. Left him, went to another doctor who was great and diagnosed a problem I had had for several years that the first doctor never addressed.

 

[OldShooter]

I think this kind of question would be easier to deal with if, instead of considering ourselves to be "patients," we thought of ourselves as "customers." Which we are.

 

[Spock]

Reading this reminds me of one of those hyper-biased political polls/surveys that showed up in my mailbox (and trash can) yesterday.

OP: Just read your own post. Would you put up with what the PCP has done/said?

 

[braumeister]

I reluctantly changed to a new PCP after 20 years for several reasons, although I liked him very much personally.

• He constantly bragged about how much exercise he got, and how important it was to work with a good dietitian, yet I watched him put on more and more weight as the years went by.
• He was gradually falling apart in many other ways (back, knees, etc.)
• He nagged me about things I repeatedly told him I didn't care about (like high cholesterol).
• Every time I saw him we wound up talking more about his health than mine.

I'm much happier with the new one, as he actually listens to me and we can have a fruitful discussion without a lecture.

 

[audreyh1]

I think this kind of question would be easier to deal with if, instead of considering ourselves to be "patients," we thought of ourselves as "customers." Which we are.

Yes, I think of myself as a client consulting my doctors.

 

[audreyh1]

I reluctantly changed to a new PCP after 20 years for several reasons, although I liked him very much personally.

• He constantly bragged about how much exercise he got, and how important it was to work with a good dietitian, yet I watched him put on more and more weight as the years went by.
• He was gradually falling apart in many other ways (back, knees, etc.)
• He nagged me about things I repeatedly told him I didn't care about (like high cholesterol).
• Every time I saw him we wound up talking more about his health than mine.

I'm much happier with the new one, as he actually listens to me and we can have a fruitful discussion without a lecture.

Oh, wow. That’s quite an experience watching a doctor take their own advice over 20 years and end up not doing well. I assume he followed what he had been trained to think was a healthy lifestyle.

 

[braumeister]

Oh, wow. That’s quite an experience watching a doctor take their own advice over 20 years and end up not doing well. I assume he followed what he had been trained to think was a healthy lifestyle.

What's worse is that he seemed to project his own problems onto his patients.

He took statins so I should take statins.
He took BP meds so I should also take them.
He took SSRI meds so ... (he once said they should put Zoloft in the water supply).
etc., etc.

 

[Jerry1]

I think this kind of question would be easier to deal with if, instead of considering ourselves to be "patients," we thought of ourselves as "customers." Which we are.

Yes, I think of myself as a client consulting my doctors.

I think of my doctors as members of my team. Teams work together as needed. Team members give and take input to/from the other team members. They treat others on the team with respect, but that doesn't mean everyone is always super nice. Most of all, I'm the owner of the team as well as a member so if one of the team members gets too far out of line, they get traded.

One of the most important things that I expect from my PCP is to have open communication. This includes a willingness to not only hear my side and concerns, but to address them, even to the point of adjusting to them. For example (not a real life situation to me), if I didn't want to take a statin, I would want to hear my other options. Now that may mean a diet that I would not be willing to follow and then I'd have to make a choice, but I'd want an open and honest discussion.

From the OP, I'd trade that PCP for another one. Yelling at you, unless it was really excitement versus scolding, would not be acceptable on my team.

 

[Mmm Rrr]

I had a PCP for about a year several years back - I had moved to a new part of the country and gotten a recommendation from a neighbor who is a nurse. The doctor seemed OK for the first few visits. Then, while we were discussing a vacation I had taken that included sites with dinosaur fossils, he told me that he believed the earth was only 6,000 years old. I really tried to weigh whether I was being unfairly judgmental, and then thought, holy crap, a doctor is (or should be) a scientist! I found my current PCP quickly and have been with her for 12 years.

 

[audreyh1]

What's worse is that he seemed to project his own problems onto his patients.

He took statins so I should take statins.
He took BP meds so I should also take them.
He took SSRI meds so ... (he once said they should put Zoloft in the water supply).
etc., etc.

Wow, so he’s taking all the medicines and getting sicker and sicker. Sounds kind of like the typical progressions of Western chronic diseases.

 

[Splash]

I would leave my PCP as soon as I felt I wasn't being respected, or listened to, or I lost confidence in his/her judgement.

Leave today!

I had to find a new PCP last year when mine retired. I asked colleagues, friends, and family for recommendations. For the ones I thought might be a fit for me, I viewed their profiles and welcome videos on their clinic websites. From there, I picked one to try and have been with him since.

 

[Aerides]

OP imagine how much better the past year or so could have been if you'd responded to her yelling episode much as you would if that happened and you were a customer in a store:

You'd have said, sorry, but I do not appreciate your tone, and I'll take my business elsewhere (or something far less polite, but same overall point).

Listen to your instinct, I hope you're already researching other area providers. The next one doesn't need to be perfect if you're due for a check up, they just need to be competent to get you started while you look around.

 

[Teacher Terry]

My first oral surgeon was very good at what he did but pompous but bearable. On my last visit he was rude, condescending and really his behavior was awful. I never went back. The next time I needed one I went to someone else. When I went to Healthgrades he had a lot of similar reviews.

 

[MRG]

OP here:

Thanks everyone! To add some context, part of my issue was we were new in the area and knew no one to ask for recommendations. Today was an interesting day that reinforced all your comments.

I went to PT and a guy I knew from the gym came in. We hadn't talked since before I was hurt and exchanged our recent war stories. I finally asked about his provider and he was happy to share his knowledge. I had one name I was interested in and he pointed out another doctor I know from the gym. He ponied up his doctor's name and mentioned some of his conditions he's treated for. So now I have 3 candidates.

Somehow the topic of our past w*rk lives came up. Turns out this clown is a retired EMT and w*rked with these folks. He gave me great insight to the pros/cons to all. What a wonderful coincidence. [emoji13]

 

[FLD3C]

For PCP's:
1) When you dont like the doctor
2) When the doctor doesn't like you
3) When you dont follow the doctors advice.
Then find someone new.

 

[Cessna152]

Firing is easy. Finding a new doc who is taking new patients seems hard. Particularly when moving to a new area where you don’t know anyone.

 

[blueskyk]

I was just thinking the same thing. Most of the discussion centers on when or where to go but this assumes choices are available. When we moved to a new area about 18 months ago, we researched and asked around on PCP recommendations. Every single one of them were not accepting new patients. It took a while to simply find a PCP that was taking new patients. (And we are not yet on Medicare)

Then, when we finally found one the office asked us a bunch of questions about our health history and said they would let us know in a couple of weeks whether the doc would “accept” us.

So, at present we are thrilled to HAVE a PCP although DH and I note he appears to be about 16 and looks like Doogie Howser. So far we like him which is fortunate all things considered.

If we wanted to leave, we would plan on an extended period of time to locate another.

 

[catii]

Definitely post a formal complaint with the AMA, but only AFTER you have a full copy of all of your medical records!

 

[partition1]

I'm not happy with current PCP because she yells. I mean she yells a lot. I don't accept yelling, I moved my retirement up a year because my VP was a yeller and I quit after he yelled at me.

When would you seek a new primary care and any tips to go about it?

My PCP told me I didn't have a 2nd Lyme infection nor did order a retest after I brought him in the lab tests confirming I did.

His lack of response caused my infection to go chronic...2+ years later I am still battling Lyme and other co-infections because of the delay. My GP did phone later and admit that I did have another case of Lyme after he did some research but he also advised me prior to his admission to start taking anti-depressants!?!

I've had several other docs shrug their shoulders to my queries about various symptoms being Lyme related (they were).

I now see a Naturopathic doc who monitors my labs and works outside the CDC box and take Eastern supplements and CBD.

You need to go with your gut. If you are somewhat educated to your medical issues and are not comfortable with an honest conversation with your doc...go elsewhere. I don't need a bedside manner...I need a doctor who will listen to me and respect my concerns. (wear a friggin clown suit into the office I don't give a cr@p)

You are your own best advocate.

 

[isisdave]

The two most important factors in a correct diagnosis are a careful history and appropriate physical exam.

I would ditch a PCP who wouldn't listen to me, or whose personality or some other aspect of the practice made it impossible to listen to him/her.

I would ditch a PCP who didn't physically examine me to the extent I thought necessary.

I would ditch a PCP who was arrogant or a know-it-all, but that would be because he/she probably wasn't listening. For a specialist, especially in life-threatening matters, I would accept an SOB who was very highly regarded in the specialty.

What's your DOCTOR's retirement age? At your retirement age, if your doctor isn't at least 15 years younger than you, I would consider going with someone younger. We did this for DW. Do you want to be looking for a new doctor at 80 because yours just retired? Also, many PCPs don't accept new patients on Medicare, although they will continue to care for you if you're an existing patient and turn 65. So you'll have more choices if you change at 63 vs waiting til 65.

 

[gayl]

Maybe its not the same??

I just sent my pain mgmt MD a 'thank you for pointing me in the right direction' email and cancelled all future appointments. I'm doing better despite CRPS and don't like meds. Especially paying an MD + PT for OTC patches.

 

[OldShooter]

Maybe its not the same?? ...

It's the same. You are the customer, he/she is the vendor. When you don't want or need the vendor's services any more, you suspend or terminate the relationship. There is a lot of unfortunate mistique built up around health care. "Patient" instead of "customer" is the first misnomer.

That is not to say that we don't want more in a customer/doctor relationship than we want with, say, a lawn service. But that is also true with attorneys, CPAs, and other professionals.

 

[gayl]

Yes, I'm a paying patient. Tired of the pain but now I know what to do [(he still wants me to see him today)sorry]

Thinking of trying CBD(?) oil

 

[davebarnes]

It's the same. You are the customer, he/she is the vendor.

+1

 

[MRG]

Yes, I'm a paying patient. Tired of the pain but now I know what to do [(he still wants me to see him today)sorry]

Thinking of trying CBD(?) oil

I've been giving some to our 13 year old dog for his arthritis. Works better than gabapentin.