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I wanna be a hobo
Old 02-19-2021, 06:26 PM   #61
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I wanna be a hobo

Hmm... all good posts. As many, my DW is a nester. Me I feel like George Bailey from ďItís a wonderful life,Ē. We had planned to go to Morocco last October, but COVID felt otherwise. Iím thinking Domestic trips in the near future with short visits/whatever with friends or family as a booster shot of familiarity. As for a bigger event, maybe an extended family vacation event that me and DW would finance? Any thoughts on an age appropriate setting, but fulfilling, for ages 2.5 to healthy 68 y.o.?
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Old 02-19-2021, 06:27 PM   #62
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We aren't on the same page with travel, my DH is happy being home or doing local New England travel or going to Florida (but won't do again until after Covid). We hope to be snow birds and then I will travel with friends other times of year. I have friends that don't have travel companions and we travel well together. DH is fine with that and we have a dog so that is always a concern.
My 20 something single children love to travel as well and we went to Africa and Europe 2 years ago which was amazing (I had never left the country before that).

It does make me feel better that others have spouses that don't love to travel too!
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Trip to Africa.
Old 02-19-2021, 06:34 PM   #63
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Trip to Africa.

To be a Barbh29, sounds great. I will be 62 years old next month and Iíve always wanted to take an REI guided trip to Kilimanjaro. My sense is it may be a little too rigorous for me. The last day of the climb is 13 hours of hiking and I imagine reaching the summit it is pretty steep. Generally, and natural experiences, but like an above average quality of lodging and dining. Any tips or references would be appreciated.
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Old 02-19-2021, 06:51 PM   #64
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uhhh...well...We ran into this issue and a few others, then decided no compromise. Fast forward 5 years ... different DW and I are on exactly the same page.
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Old 02-19-2021, 06:58 PM   #65
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At age 65 DW and I have decided it's now or never. She just got her second vaccine. The time is now. Sorry.
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Old 02-19-2021, 06:59 PM   #66
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Originally Posted by Jakob View Post
Hmm... all good posts. As many, my DW is a nester. Me I feel like George Bailey from ďItís a wonderful life,Ē. We had planned to go to Morocco last October, but COVID felt otherwise. Iím thinking Domestic trips in the near future with short visits/whatever with friends or family as a booster shot of familiarity. As for a bigger event, maybe an extended family vacation event that me and DW would finance? Any thoughts on an age appropriate setting, but fulfilling, for ages 2.5 to healthy 68 y.o.?
Your username caught my eye, my sonís name Jakob.

For a fun extended family trip, I strongly recommend Japan if everyone is able bodied. If youíre looking for domestic how about a dude ranch in Wyoming? An Alaska cruise worked great for one of our extended family trips.
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Old 02-19-2021, 07:23 PM   #67
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And I really don't enjoy traveling by myself. I want someone to share the adventure with, and I would strongly prefer a partner rather than "just" a travel buddy. No luck on that front though. I've taken a couple of trips with small groups, and I'll do more of that as I get more into retirement. (Currently 64 and still working part-time.)

Maybe we need a "travel buddy matchmaking service."
+1

omni
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Old 02-19-2021, 07:26 PM   #68
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Your username caught my eye, my sonís name Jakob.

For a fun extended family trip, I strongly recommend Japan if everyone is able bodied. If youíre looking for domestic how about a dude ranch in Wyoming? An Alaska cruise worked great for one of our extended family trips.
Thanks, good recommendations. I have some colleagues who live in China I also wanted to visit there. Have you ever been. Keep the ideas flowing.
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Old 02-19-2021, 07:28 PM   #69
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I found that sometimes a bit of compromise helps. For example, one spouse goes to the British War Museum on Wednesday while the other goes to the Tea Time Fashion museum. At the end of the day meet for dinner at the local Pub and share adventures.
DW and I wholeheartedly agree with this. We like to be together when traveling, but our interests diverge so we will plan for "split days" as in your example. Of course, DW knows that if she dresses in a cute outfit, I'll likely follow her anywhere . Then again, I'm the one she "caught" being chatted up by a pretty but buzzed woman, so DW "accuses" me saying "Now I know why you want to split up sometimes..."

Neither one of us is the one who consistently does not want to travel. When I first retired I had just been on several business trips in the preceding 2 months, including one that ended just a few days before I retired, so I wanted a break. But she was eager to travel visit family so we took international trips in July and August, so I never felt I was truly retired until September. Since then we have been more in sync. I'm ready to travel again now - even just a drive-to destination - but DW is still very cautious about the pandemic situation.
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Wink We do what we must.
Old 02-19-2021, 07:40 PM   #70
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Wink We do what we must.

Jollystomper, I think it is wise that your wife be reluctant to travel during Covid times. The two of you may be careful, but others may not. Once Americans are vaccinated at the 60% population rate, I think it will be fairly safe to travel. Specially as the two of you are vaccinated with both doses. I work in, and I have already received my first vaccination, however DW has not received either of her vaccinations. We are both in very good health, save a blip on the radar for me last year which turned out to be a lifesaver. Our oldest daughter lives in Texas and has our year and a half old grandson. Our first grandchild. Iím sure my wife is very anxious to visit. I plan on using this to coerce my wife into a trip to the south west.
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Old 02-19-2021, 07:56 PM   #71
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We too are reluctant to travel. Our Government has advised us not to travel and specifically not to cruise. So we have stayed home.

The last thing we want to pick when traveling is covid. We are typically in Thailand and sometimes Australia at this time of year. We miss it very much. Bottom line for us is the countries we typically go to both last fall and this winter are closed to travelers.

We came home early at the end of March last year and have stayed put since then. Will be glad when it is, for the most part, all over. I suspect that the next few months will be critical. The health authorities are privately very concerned about the the new strains of covid-especially their substantially increased transfer rates.
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Smile
Old 02-19-2021, 08:42 PM   #72
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Originally Posted by brett View Post
After downsizing, we changed our lifestyle to accommodate travel-planned and last minute.

No plants, no pets, lawn and snow removal done by HOA. We turn off the water, cancel our auto insurance, a kind neighbour collects our mail and checks on our house every week or so. We are always 'good to go' as it were.
What do you do with your car?
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Old 02-19-2021, 09:15 PM   #73
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To be a Barbh29, sounds great. I will be 62 years old next month and Iíve always wanted to take an REI guided trip to Kilimanjaro. My sense is it may be a little too rigorous for me. The last day of the climb is 13 hours of hiking and I imagine reaching the summit it is pretty steep. Generally, and natural experiences, but like an above average quality of lodging and dining. Any tips or references would be appreciated.
I can't speak for Kilimanjaro (except its beautiful to see from a plane) however if you are interested in Safari and lodging I highly recommend TAASA Lodge. I became friends with the owners (family run from Minnesota) and they are well run. I'm sure they can give you information on the hiking and other things like the Crater etc. I had no interest in going on a safari but it was wonderful! Happy to give you more info or contact information!
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Old 02-20-2021, 05:50 AM   #74
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For the homebody female scenario and bored male I would suggest buying a vacation home in an area with a lot of day or short-hop tripping with easy flight connections home.

1) she will enjoy the process of setting up a home with her taste and then having a second nest that provides the emotional feedback her home provides. Choose a beachy or resorty place or otherwise that will attract her social/family pod with comfortable number of bedrooms.

2) good flight connections for her friends and maybe free flights for kids will further make her comfortable. You or her can pop back home for special holidays and family events.

3) being near an international airport like Miami or Orlando makes short hops to the Americas or islands possible or longer hops to Europe. Every snowbird community has a cruising crowd.

4) you may need to recalibrate your learned way of getting out of boredom when not working. In a snowbird community, you have an unlimited opportunity to network with guys in the same boat.

Couple cliques and boy and girl gang groups form to generate amusements. It is natural for a wife to have a time limit on only having DH to talk to day after day when away from home.

5) DW needs to elevate her attention on keeping DH from boredom and depression, which dials down the immune system and sets the stage for terminal illness and early widowhood.

6) this lifestyle requires either petlessness, a pet small enough to fly, or be prepared to drive the animals back and forth. To dog or not to dog is the question.

7) boil the lobster gradually. Spot a city south with a direct flight and make short trips. Try to get her interested in decorating a second home. First a week, then a month, and so on. Owning ties you long enough to establish relationships. People texting asking when will you be available for whatever.

8) after a decade you may wish to try a different area, but I think the comforts of a second home, knowing your neighbours, having friends to hang with, becomes more important than exploration.
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Old 02-20-2021, 08:31 AM   #75
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For the homebody female scenario and bored male I would suggest buying a vacation home in an area with a lot of day or short-hop tripping with easy flight connections home.



1) she will enjoy the process of setting up a home with her taste and then having a second nest that provides the emotional feedback her home provides. Choose a beachy or resorty place or otherwise that will attract her social/family pod with comfortable number of bedrooms.



2) good flight connections for her friends and maybe free flights for kids will further make her comfortable. You or her can pop back home for special holidays and family events.



3) being near an international airport like Miami or Orlando makes short hops to the Americas or islands possible or longer hops to Europe. Every snowbird community has a cruising crowd.



4) you may need to recalibrate your learned way of getting out of boredom when not working. In a snowbird community, you have an unlimited opportunity to network with guys in the same boat.



Couple cliques and boy and girl gang groups form to generate amusements. It is natural for a wife to have a time limit on only having DH to talk to day after day when away from home.



5) DW needs to elevate her attention on keeping DH from boredom and depression, which dials down the immune system and sets the stage for terminal illness and early widowhood.



6) this lifestyle requires either petlessness, a pet small enough to fly, or be prepared to drive the animals back and forth. To dog or not to dog is the question.



7) boil the lobster gradually. Spot a city south with a direct flight and make short trips. Try to get her interested in decorating a second home. First a week, then a month, and so on. Owning ties you long enough to establish relationships. People texting asking when will you be available for whatever.



8) after a decade you may wish to try a different area, but I think the comforts of a second home, knowing your neighbours, having friends to hang with, becomes more important than exploration.


Thanks Kroeran! I thank that is great advice! My DW likes her own nest and only tolerates rentals and hotel rooms for so long!
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Old 02-20-2021, 09:31 AM   #76
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What do you do with your car?

When we are gone for two months or more we park the car in the garage, remove all insurance except fire and theft. During our winter trips I pull the battery and store it inside.
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Old 02-20-2021, 11:01 AM   #77
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I believe the difference for us is that we have always traveled since marrying. We delayed having children for 11 years because we were not ready, we wanted to travel, and DW wanted to be a stay at home mom.

During our working lives we made travel a priority over a new car etc. So when retirement came we both had an extensive list. Our first trip post retirement was 7 months. It started with a trip to Africa and a safari....the top of DW’s bucket list.

The only compromise was limiting our trips to two months duration. By the end of that DW wants to get home and see her own ‘things’ again. We travel with carry on only so by the end of two months she is tired of her travel clothes.
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Old 02-20-2021, 11:48 AM   #78
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The moral of the story is: travel while you can! Eventually, you may not be able to!
+1

I would add 'enjoy whatever activity you prefer' into the above sentence also.

In early 2019 I did a 3 week tour around Eastern Europe with my bad, painful knee. In July I had the knee replaced thinking I would return to my normal traveling in 2020. I remember thinking I should have planned my Eastern Europe trip for 2020 also, since the new knee was so much better than the old damaged knee. I could have done a few things I stayed away from because of the damaged knee.

I learned my lesson in 2020. Today I am glad I limped about Eastern Europe when I did. I was thinking of moving a Spring trip planned for this year to Fall so I could see the Fall colors. Then a certain former FDA official warned we could see Covid raise its ugly head in Fall thanks to these new variants. Maybe it will. Maybe it won't. But, I am going to do the trip in Spring. If Covid stays in its place, I'll possibly do another in the Fall.
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try Pickleball
Old 02-20-2021, 08:07 PM   #79
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try Pickleball

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I'm thinking there won't be much to do at home once the kids move out or otherwise gain more independence.
If you are even moderately athletically inclined, try the fast growing sport of pickle ball! friendly pick up groups exist all over the country, the demographic skews retirement age, but all ages and skills play together, rotating partners between games. The small court keeps the mobility challenges reasonable, skill and subtle ball control and strategy can trump power playing, and as retiree myself itís been a delightful way for me to spend time several days a week with folks from many walks of life...great community spirit, kept me sane through the pandemic.
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Old 02-22-2021, 04:07 AM   #80
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OP, I had a cousin in a similar predicament. Eventually they got up to a few weeks in FL to escape the winter cold. Usually fear of traveling is due to either ignorance of the delights of travel or a bad childhood experience (i.e. Dad drove us crazy in the car as kids, etc etc). So start small and make sure the experiences are enjoyable for your loved one.
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