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03-12-2020, 08:33 PM
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#1
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 2,840
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Coronavirus Humor
This is why people hoard toilet paper
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03-12-2020, 08:46 PM
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#2
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2008
Location: No fixed abode
Posts: 8,764
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__________________
"Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement." - Anonymous (not Will Rogers or Sam Clemens)
DW and I - FIREd at 50 (7/06), living off assets
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03-13-2020, 08:21 AM
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#3
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 8,368
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While we're posting vids - I keep humming this one lately:
__________________
"Exit, pursued by a bear."
The Winter's Tale, William Shakespeare
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03-13-2020, 01:34 PM
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#4
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Administrator
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 40,514
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Coronavirus Humor
So, what’s a crisis without a little humor.
I know a great joke about Corona Virus, you probably won't get it though.
A man walks into a bar and goes up to the bartender and says "I'll have a Corona please, hold the virus"
I sneezed in the bank today, it was the most attention I have received in the last 10 years.
With all this talk of Corona Virus, the people who make Purell are rubbing their hands together in glee.
Definition of Irony - When the Year Of The Rat starts with a plague.
Ok, so if the Corona Virus isn't about beer, why do I keep hearing about cases of it?
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03-13-2020, 01:37 PM
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#5
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Administrator
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Pacific NW
Posts: 6,161
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Seems about right
tp in seattle.jpg
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03-13-2020, 01:41 PM
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#6
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 430
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MichaelB
So, what’s a crisis without a little humor.
I know a great joke about Corona Virus, you probably won't get it though.
A man walks into a bar and goes up to the bartender and says "I'll have a Corona please, hold the virus"
I sneezed in the bank today, it was the most attention I have received in the last 10 years.
With all this talk of Corona Virus, the people who make Purell are rubbing their hands together in glee.
Definition of Irony - When the Year Of The Rat starts with a plague.
Ok, so if the Corona Virus isn't about beer, why do I keep hearing about cases of it?
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These jokes will go viral
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03-13-2020, 01:42 PM
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#7
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Moderator
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 10,623
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MichaelB
Ok, so if the Corona Virus isn't about beer, why do I keep hearing about cases of it?
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[queue rimshot sound effect]
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03-13-2020, 02:39 PM
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#8
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Administrator
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 40,514
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03-13-2020, 02:48 PM
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#9
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 236
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So the World Health Organization has decided that despite what was previously thought dogs can't transmit the virus so they've all been released from quarantine. So WHO let the dogs out.
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03-13-2020, 02:54 PM
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#10
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Red Rock Country
Posts: 1,912
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03-13-2020, 02:55 PM
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#11
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gone traveling
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 538
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The 4 Horsemen of the Coronavirus:
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03-13-2020, 03:25 PM
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#12
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,405
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MichaelB
So, what’s a crisis without a little humor.
I know a great joke about Corona Virus, you probably won't get it though.
A man walks into a bar and goes up to the bartender and says "I'll have a Corona please, hold the virus"
I sneezed in the bank today, it was the most attention I have received in the last 10 years.
With all this talk of Corona Virus, the people who make Purell are rubbing their hands together in glee.
Definition of Irony - When the Year Of The Rat starts with a plague.
Ok, so if the Corona Virus isn't about beer, why do I keep hearing about cases of it?
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Johnny Carson, is that you?
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03-13-2020, 03:46 PM
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#13
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Les Bois
Posts: 5,761
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at least the ncaa tournament was cancelled when Baylor was having a good year...
the astros should easily be able to hear the trash can bang now - we should win 110
__________________
You can't be a retirement plan actuary without a retirement plan, otherwise you lose all credibility...
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03-13-2020, 07:55 PM
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#14
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: GTA
Posts: 1,725
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Official Anthem of the Coronavirus
__________________
Family Motto: "Every penny's a prisoner"
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03-14-2020, 10:07 AM
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#15
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Texas: No Country for Old Men
Posts: 50,000
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In response to the closing of schools and the cancellation of any event, meeting, or other gathering of people in order to stem the transmission of disease, one cheery neighbor posted this on the local Facebook group:
Quote:
Calling all residents of XXXXXXX!
Things are getting a little crazy out there. We all haven’t met each other and I thought that we may want to get to know one another before the craziness really hits....and to be neighborly 😊
If you’d like to have a little meet & greet come on down to the end of the cul-de-sac Wednesday (18Mar) evening around 6:30pm.
Totally informal. Bring a folding chair & drink to sit and chat 😁
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Yes, lets get up close and personal with social distancing!
__________________
Numbers is hard
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03-14-2020, 10:55 AM
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#16
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 6,496
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Quote:
Originally Posted by REWahoo
In response to the closing of schools and the cancellation of any event, meeting, or other gathering of people in order to stem the transmission of disease, one cheery neighbor posted this on the local Facebook group:
Yes, lets get up close and personal with social distancing!
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Forgot to say, chairs 7 feet apart, and bring your hearing aid.
__________________
There must be moderation in everything, including moderation.
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03-14-2020, 11:17 AM
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#17
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Louisville
Posts: 600
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It was reported that three men in surgical masks walked into a bank. All of the customers began to panic. Then they found out the men were only there to rob the bank, and everyone calmed down.
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03-14-2020, 11:18 AM
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#18
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 669
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Have you heard about the Corolla virus?
Attacks the system computer in high end cars.
And one week later you drive around in a Corolla.
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03-14-2020, 12:40 PM
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#19
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 2,130
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__________________
And whatever your labors and aspirations in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.- Desiderata by Max Ehrmann
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03-14-2020, 01:02 PM
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#20
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Administrator
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 40,514
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Quarantini
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