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-   -   Is There Any Yearning to Be Recognized for Your FIRE Success? (https://www.early-retirement.org/forums/f29/is-there-any-yearning-to-be-recognized-for-your-fire-success-107864.html)

Dtail 02-11-2021 01:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by capitalhockey (Post 2559526)
I think it's more of a sibling thing with my brother and I. It gets under my skin from time to time. It's easier to paint a mirage of success with debt.

He might get the short-term accolades but his finances were on thin ice. I rather be in my position than his for the long term.

Well in the end, you will probably get recognized indirectly by retiring first.

ExFlyBoy5 02-11-2021 01:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Midpack (Post 2559551)
To clarify, I didn’t want to be recognized for my financial success. I didn’t strive for mediocrity in job performance by any means, I always worked hard to be the best at anything I did in my career. I was always willing to go above and beyond. I never would have enjoyed all the promotions I was blessed with otherwise, that enabled me to retire early.

Ah, thanks for the clarification. ;D Thankfully in the military (at least for us enlisted sweatys) promotions are tied to testing and a performance evaluation system that is (or was) pretty ineffective. Unless you were an absolute idiot, got a DUI or something similar you would get promoted up to E-7. The last two stripes did involve a selection board, but I had no desire to attain those stripes as I would have been relegated to flying a desk and I was very happy to be a "professional technician" and flying my arse off. I was very good at what I did and never busted a checkride and got quite a few "exceptionally qualified" checkride results so in that regard, I wasn't very mediocre. However, when it came to the other stuff that was expected outside my flying j*b, I didn't seek out those "opportunities" ;D

OldShooter 02-11-2021 01:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by capitalhockey (Post 2559367)
... Is there any yearning to be recognized for your FIRE success?

No. I look at this as just a piece of an overall strategy wanting to be underestimated. I have found it to be an advantage in many situations both in business and personally.

My idol in this was a guy I knew maybe 25 years ago, Jim D. Jim was about 80YO and dressed in those dark green uniform shirts and pants that Sears used to sell. His shoes were the workman's low top black oxfords with ribbed oil-proof soles, topped with white socks. His hair looked like he had cut it himself. He ran several businesses, including building turnkey bioethanol plants and building airline fueler trucks. If he was worth a dime, he was worth $10M or more.

One fun time was at a city council meeting where both of us had business with the council. When Jim's turn came he shambled up to the lectern and made his case. The council instantly approve what the nice old man wanted. They never had a clue what they were dealing with. The man was an artist. I'm sure he is gone now, but I still think of him fondly.

brett 02-11-2021 01:34 PM

The other piece of advice I would give are...

-never fall in love with a stock. Sell it at the right time financially, not the right time from a tax perspective.

-don't fall in love with your employers stock or stock options. Don't drink the kool-aid about the future stock price.

I know of a number of people who put their retirement at risk by not exercising stock options before they went under water. OTOH, I know several who, like me, developed a realistic and laddered option disposition plan that allowed them to retire, protect that retirement, and leave with a very healthy nest egg.

YVRRocketSurgery 02-11-2021 01:36 PM

Morgan Housel has a great quote that essentially says that a lot of what our perception of wealth is driven by what we see other people buying. But in reality, financial wealth isn't what you see; it's what you don't see (ie what you don't spend and stached away in your savings/investment accounts).

Quote:

Originally Posted by capitalhockey (Post 2559367)
Is there any yearning to be recognized for your FIRE success?

For me, it's a bit of a yes/no juxtaposition.

Yes, because you know how it can be at family gatherings. :laugh:
And I freely admit I have a fragile ego. :laugh:
No, because I generally don't like being in the spotlight/under a microscope nor potentially saddled with expectations, real or perceived.

2k6_TX_Dad 02-11-2021 01:52 PM

Opposite
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by capitalhockey (Post 2559367)
Is there any yearning to be recognized for your FIRE success?

I'll take the opposite viewpoint. I would like to be recognized (by others than on this forum). But mainly to show FIRE is an achievable goal and so I can pass along how being FI can help you enjoy things others might find frustrating.

For example, I enjoy driving my 14y/o Toyota pickup, not because it's the only car I can afford, because it's helped achieve my goals.

Perhaps it futile, there are lots of posts on this forum related to the difference between spenders and savers and "never the twain shall meet", but I believe there are some in the middle and are overexposed to the ones who spend and underexposed to those who save. (By reading this thread, by their choice).

Lawrencewendall 02-11-2021 02:10 PM

We've been called the Clampetts by the neighbors but I'm RE and they are not. Suck eggs!

RetireeRobert 02-11-2021 02:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lawrencewendall (Post 2559584)
We've been called the Clampetts by the neighbors but I'm RE and they are not. Suck eggs!


Exactly! RE status is its own best reward.

I must admit though, I did so love submitting my resignation letter when I left my office and left all the BS behind. And I loved my former bosses seeing me walk away at age 54 with three kids then aged 7, 11, and 17, and them wondering how can he do that? And a few years later, designing and having built our dream home (where I now live) and being able to pay cash for it--no mortgage. And I knew my former bosses had to stay at work and put up with all the BS for years longer. Yes, I did like that, a high point in my life.

capitalhockey 02-11-2021 02:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RetireeRobert (Post 2559587)
Exactly! RE status is its own best reward.

I must admit though, I did so love submitting my resignation letter when I left my office and left all the BS behind. And I loved my former bosses seeing me walk away at age 54 with three kids then aged 7, 11, and 17, and them wondering how can he do that? And a few years later, designing and having built our dream home (where I now live) and being able to pay cash for it--no mortgage. And I knew my former bosses had to stay at work and put up with all the BS for years longer. Yes, I did like that, a high point in my life.

Congrats!

I have two young kids under 4 now....hope to be in your shoes in 10 years. Did retirement allow you to be more involved in kids' school and activities?

Montecfo 02-11-2021 02:30 PM

We always lived well but spent less than similarly situated folks. Definitely more value oriented on vehicles.

But I learned long ago that cars are more often a marker for debt than financial success.

So try to keep a low profile and try not to get famous. Financial success is its own reward and allows you to be very charitable and help others.

Jerry1 02-11-2021 02:36 PM

More like vindication than recognition. In 2008 when people were worried about or actually losing their houses and jobs, it felt good to know that my LBYM lifestyle had paid off. Never had any concerns about losing my house, which was almost paid off by then and felt very confident that if I did lose my job, I would have been fine. That felt pretty good given that I did have times where I was a bit envious of my friends/colleagues with larger nicer houses. In the end, as was stated, I think a number of people did recognize that I retired early and were a bit envious of me.

Ultimately though, you just have to live the life you decide is best for you. That’s what I did and I’m happy.

travelover 02-11-2021 02:38 PM

I only brag here, but on the internet, no one knows you are really a dog.

RetireeRobert 02-11-2021 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by capitalhockey (Post 2559590)
Congrats!

I have two young kids under 4 now....hope to be in your shoes in 10 years. Did retirement allow you to be more involved in kids' school and activities?

Yes indeed. I spent my early retirement ferrying kids to and back from school, and activities.

While my wife had at first maybe "worried" a little about me being home so much, she soon came to enjoy the relief from being principle taxi driver for all the kids' comings and goings! We were also able to take several family cruises/train trips/car trips from which memories were made.

I never for one second looked back at work and regretted my RE decision. With benefit of hindsight, I now know I would have regretted NOT going RE when I did.

Gumby 02-11-2021 02:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by travelover (Post 2559597)
I only brag here, but on the internet, no one know you are really a dog.

I'm sure you're one of those fancy purebreds.

Out-to-Lunch 02-11-2021 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by travelover (Post 2559597)
I only brag here, but on the internet, no one knows you are really a dog.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gumby (Post 2559599)
I'm sure you're one of those fancy purebreds.

He can't fool me. I can see that he is a duck!

unclemick 02-11-2021 04:05 PM

Hmm - early days I was 'plain in the butt cheap' and bent your ear - mainly on forums even if you didn't want to hear it. Loved the 'Four Yorkshiremen', dryer sheet posts and Dory36's - 33% That's My Story.

Time marches on. Now we are regular old 'phart' and 'phartet' of retirement age. Aka 70's.

Heh heh heh - And time in the Market has eliminated much of my former 'cheap'. 'frugal', er 'thrifty ways.' Ordinary and 'you can't take it with you mentality. :flowers:

pjigar 02-11-2021 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by capitalhockey (Post 2559367)
Is there any yearning to be recognized for your FIRE success?

Quite the contrary, I would like to fly under the radar forever. Sometimes it is hard to see people blowing off money knowing that they can't afford it. But I just remind myself that I choose to trade time+happiness for money which is a great deal IMHO.

pjigar 02-11-2021 04:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zekeboz (Post 2559442)
True to my heart but is my wife's dismay. "Can you PLEASE take off your sweatshirt with paint stains before we go out..?"

Lol, I visit lot of hardware stores in that handyman attire complete with sweatshirt with paint stain and jeans with holes. I do it because I am either in the middle of a project or about to start a project. My wife really hates it when I do that.

rk911 02-11-2021 06:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by capitalhockey (Post 2559367)
...Is there any yearning to be recognized for your FIRE success?

nope. but it would be cool to see the look on
my sister’s face when she sees the extent of the estate when we’re both gone.

CoolRich59 02-11-2021 06:31 PM

When I RE'd, I expected lots of questions and discussion from family and friends. I thought it would be a good opportunity to 'advance the FIRE cause' so to speak. Plus, I admit, I wanted to bask in the glow of my achievement.

Not long after I RE'd, we hosted a family party. I even discussed with the DW how we would respond to certain questions. To my surprise, not only was there no discussion, my retirement was not mentioned once.

I was a little deflated, but the experience was humbling. Now, I prefer the "anonymity". In fact, I was talking to one of my nieces during the holidays. She asked if I was able to w*rk from home during covid and was surprised when I told her I'd been retired for close to three years. :)


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