Men, women, relationships and money

[Martha]

This article is a few months old, but it is interesting: http://www.lawyers.com/pdc/pressroom/article_redbook.asp

Based on a harris Interactive survey of 1796 adults ages 25 to 55 in "commited" relationships:

--1/3 have been dishonest with their partner about spending habits

--41% of women are in charge of the household budget, and only 21% of men

--42% of men are in charge of investment decisions, and only 12% of women

--38% of men are in charge of retirement savings, and only 14% of women

--31% of men are in charge of debt repayment and only 22% of women.

The article doesn't define "in charge" or how many people make joint decisions. But it is interesting how many people do not identify decisions as joint.

FWIW

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

--42% of men are in charge of investment decisions, and only 12% of women

Ok, so 54%. Does that mean the other 46% dont invest, decide jointly, or declined to respond?

Some of my wifes stories about co-workers are really pretty scary. Theres one guy that gets an "allowance" from his wife to spend on his lunch and anything else he wants to buy without her permission. I wonder if he has to call her "mommy" when he asks for something

 

[brewer12345]

I wonder if he has to call her "mommy" when he asks for something

Mommy, can I have a BJ?

 

[Texas Proud]

Ok, so 54%.  Does that mean the other 46% dont invest, decide jointly, or declined to respond?

Some of my wifes stories about co-workers are really pretty scary.  Theres one guy that gets an "allowance" from his wife to spend on his lunch and anything else he wants to buy without her permission.  I wonder if he has to call her "mommy" when he asks for something

My sister and BIL does that... they each get their allowance... do anything you want with it, but all other decisions must be made by both... obviously you are still new to it all..

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Mommy, can I have a BJ?

I had this horrible momentary mental picture involving bill and hillary

 

[Nords]

Ok, so 54%.  Does that mean the other 46% dont invest, decide jointly, or declined to respond?

We're a team. That means spouse gets to make the decisions and I get to do the work.

So technically I'm in charge of all that stuff and she's only in charge of the decisions. Sort of the way Reagan ran the White House...

 

[thefed]

Mommy, can I have a BJ?

i wish thats all it took!!!!

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

We're a team. That means spouse gets to make the decisions and I get to do the work.

We're on the same program here at la casa bunny...

 

[astromeria]

We're a team. That means spouse gets to make the decisions and I get to do the work.

Ditto, inclduing my doing the financial planning--but he loads a mean dishwasher as long as I keep up his morale. Minds out of the bedroom guys, I mean cooking and planning a social life, cultural events, nature treks, etc. Well, the other stuff, too

 

[OldAgePensioner]

Because of some operations, I had large tubes put in pubic places and caused those parts to enlarge, since that time I have been very popular with the ladies and relationships have flourished but the money has flowed like wine.

 

[Outtahere]

OAP, I'm going to put my imagination to work and picture the women chasing you down the street waving money at you.

 

[Leonidas]

We're a team. That means spouse gets to make the decisions and I get to do the work.

The Princess has a more simple program - we share the benefits of my work - what's hers is hers and what's mine is hers as well. I'm confused about this teamwork stuff.

 

[HFWR]

Your job is to guard the pitcher of margueritas water cooler...

I learned this in high school sports... :

 

[Toejam]

Because of some operations, I had large tubes put in pubic places and caused those parts to enlarge, since that time I have been very popular with the ladies and relationships have flourished but the money has flowed like wine.

Hello OAP:

Did you mean "public" places? More and better advertising for the ladies that way. Just kidding!

Oh, btw, what's going on with the Jewish Princess and the young (ghost-interested) lady from Haight? Met any more interesting characters in your building or in the neighborhood?

Toejam

 

[laurence]

Ok, so 54%. Does that mean the other 46% dont invest, decide jointly, or declined to respond?

Some of my wifes stories about co-workers are really pretty scary. Theres one guy that gets an "allowance" from his wife to spend on his lunch and anything else he wants to buy without her permission. I wonder if he has to call her "mommy" when he asks for something

Hey, I get an "allowance"!

Our household is just like the plurality/majority responses in the article, She does the day to day financing, my paycheck gets auto deposited mostly in her account with $100 into mine (my allowance). But I do all the financing and debt payment decision making, including when/if to refinance, how to pay for big ticket items, stuff like that. She enjoys paying the bills and managing the day to day which by all means, I'll be happy to stay out of the way on that! We both run any purchase over $40 past each other.

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Same here, except our "check with me" limit is a thousand bucks. Mostly because I want to make sure theres enough in the checking acct.

Truth is, she works and watches the baby most of the time when she's off, and I do everything else. She says its like staying at a really nice hotel with a great restaurant and concierge service.

Every once in a while I update a 3 page letter that says where our money is, why its there, and what she should consider doing with it over time, how our bills are paid, etc.

She has said that she misses cutting the lawn once in a while. I may indulge her this summer when its 100 out.

 

[Nords]

She has said that she misses cutting the lawn once in a while.

Send her over to our yard anytime; we'll even provide the mower.

I'll give you our kid as collateral...

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Whadda ya think, i'm stoopid? You'll never want her back. When she sees that we leave the keys for the lexus on the counter, she'll never wanna go back either

 

[REWahoo]

Whadda ya think, i'm stoopid?

See? Once again I show restraint...

What he said...

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Ah, you just had nothing to say...

 

[mickeyd]

In our house I have tried to make it a joint decision making process when it comes to investments but since I have 99% of the knowledge and 99.9% of the initiative it is quite difficult to get more than a cursery "ok" out of the BW.

If it were up to BW all of our savings (if there were any at all) would still be sitting the the S&L passbook account that she had as a kid making about 2.5%.

I'm far from an investment genius, but the process of arriving at an asset allocation and selecting the appropriate assets that make up that allocation is not the stuff that takes a genius to figure out. It is not all that difficult for the average Joe, or mickeyd to do.

What holds back the majority of potential investors is procrastination. Rather than making a "misatake", they do nothing.  And nothing is the worst mistake that most folks can make!

Nothing is one step below an S&L passbook account.

 

[h2xblive]

I've been putting off investing for quite a while now.  And I'll have to disagree, it's better to do nothing than lose your money.  Look at those poors chaps who used to work for PG&E and Enron. Where did all their retirement money go? :

Until you have a steady stream of income that can make up for any hits you might take while investing, do not put your money in any account that is not backed by the full faith and credit of the United States Government.

 

[mickj]

Or don't be stupid and invest more than 5% in company stock.

 

[h2xblive]

Is it really common investing advice that one never puts more than 5% of their retirement money into their company's stock?

 

[Nords]

Is it really common investing advice that one never puts more than 5% of their retirement money into their company's stock?

No, but maybe it should be.

Having more than 5% of a retirement portfolio invested with the same company that's paying one's salary implies a lack of diversification... if the company goes under it can kill two birds with one stone!