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-   -   Paid off Mortgage- Should I share? (https://www.early-retirement.org/forums/f27/paid-off-mortgage-should-i-share-57290.html)

Gumby 08-06-2011 07:43 AM

Be happy and proud of your achievement. Go to dinner at a nice restaurant and spring for an expensive bottle of wine.

But I see a lot of downside and no upside to sharing the information with family and friends.

MichaelB 08-06-2011 07:59 AM

There is sharing, and there is bragging. What some intend as the first (sharing) others see as the second (bragging). Sometimes there is nothing you can do to change that except keep your good fortune to yourself.

chinaco 08-06-2011 08:11 AM

Congrats.

We shared it with family and a few friend if the topic came up.

On our current home... I paid off some of my mortgages in about 2.5 years (doing refi's).;)

But we used 15 year fixed.

Still each time we refi'd we were back at 15 years. I paid extra principle the whole time... reduce the payoff a few years.

But we paid off our debt right at 10 years from the date we bought it.


After the meltdown happened and interest rates began to reek... I decided there was little reason to hold it... I certainly was not going to refi with less than 5 years left in payments... and we had a pile of money in fixed assets.

Amethyst 08-06-2011 08:51 AM

You should not tell anybody who isn't a member of your personal fan club, with a lifetime's interest in having you succeed in absolutely everything. Everybody else is either uninterested, jealous, or will think you're strangely obsessed with money.

Or this board, which is specifically set up to let us discuss our strange money obsessions.

Amethyst

rescueme 08-06-2011 08:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Amethyst (Post 1097430)
Or this board, which is specifically set up to let us discuss our strange money obsessions.

Hey - speak for yourself :laugh: ...

Sue J 08-06-2011 09:28 AM

We told our parents because we knew they'd be happy for us. My sister married a man with a paid off house so she understood and no problem there. We told DH's siblings because he's the oldest and they all knew we were close to paying it off. We bought our house long before any of the rest of them.

The bigger thrill was letting them know that when DH retired that we were completely debt free. We had paid off the house before the cars and the kids's student loans so we took care of those last things when he retired.

All concerned are happy for us and no one has come to us for cash or borrowing. Any sibling comparisons now would be over property taxes. Ours are $200/mo and some of our family live in areas with very high property taxes in the range of $600-$800/mo.

arebelspy 08-06-2011 10:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Amethyst
You should not tell anybody who isn't a member of your personal fan club, with a lifetime's interest in having you succeed in absolutely everything. Everybody else is either uninterested, jealous, or will think you're strangely obsessed with money.

Or this board, which is specifically set up to let us discuss our strange money obsessions.

Amethyst

I like how you worded this first sentence. I'm going to have to tuck that away for future use.

GregLee 08-06-2011 10:47 AM

I'm more comfortable staying under everyone's radar, not just friends and relatives. I didn't tell anyone when I paid off my mortgage; my house is old and looks pretty dilapidated; I drive an old car. The poorer I look, the safer I feel.

Hobo 08-06-2011 11:10 AM

I think your decision should rest on what you feel comfortable doing. This is a family affair and I don't know if your family has a tradition of sharing with each other. In many other cultures sharing would be commonplace, almost expected.

As you can see from the other comments, in America, you are expected to work like a dog so you can first provide for your immediate family. Once the last kid graduates from college, all the money saved goes into your retirement fund. You worked hard and planned to pay off your mortgage quickly - that's not like winning the lottery, it is hard work and sacrifice on your part. The faster you can get out of the rat race the better your life should be. In my family no one else would think of asking me for a loan. If anybody did, I would say, "I made a deal with the bank. They promised never to involve themselves in my business and I promised to never loan money." :dance:

Beryl 08-06-2011 06:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pimpmyretirement
I would only share with people having a similar level of financial success.

This is what I do. I have a wealthy aunt with whom I've talked money for almost 30 years. I tell her about major awards, stock options, and major acquisitions. She 'gets it' and provides advice.

W2R 08-06-2011 06:50 PM

When I paid mine off, I told my mother because I knew she was worried about my financial situation after my divorce. I told my brother, because his faith in me was a big factor in being able to get it done quickly. I told F. because he is always on my side and I knew he would be happy for me.

As for others, I told a few but NOT in a big group. At work I was grinning irrepressibly, and my good friend asked me why and was teasing me about it in a friendly way, so I whispered it to her.

rcbrad 08-07-2011 07:45 AM

Thanks to all for the interesting and kind replies. Yes, I have kept it under wraps for awhile now. It is mostly my family that I am concerned with. I just feel like I am hiding something or keeping a secret, when it comes to my family. My brother was talking about refinancing and asking what interest rate I was paying to try to help me. He refinanced recently. I just had to make something up. I also get comments from family about how lucky we are to be working, to pay our mortgages, I just feel funny agreeing with them, when I am finished paying for my home.

At work and and with some other friends at times we talk about struggling to make ends meet, but I really would rather just not tell people about not having a mortgage. (although I have a 3500+ property tax bill each year.)

Amethyst 08-07-2011 07:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rcbrad (Post 1097747)
I also get comments from family about how lucky we are to be working,

To which one graceful response could be, "Yes, we are grateful we have good jobs, when so many people are out of work." It's the truth, nobody can find fault with it, and it covers everything.

A.

Glo 08-07-2011 08:59 AM

We paid off our home in our early 50's; we shared because we were proud. Our friends and family were happy.

HFWR 08-07-2011 09:00 AM

If you must share, I could use some help paying off MY mortgage... :laugh:

rescueme 08-07-2011 09:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HFWR (Post 1097792)
If you must share, I could use some help paying off MY mortgage... :laugh:

Nah - we did it on our own; we feel confident that you can do the same.

Otherwise we would be taking away from your sucess on standing on your own :2funny: ...

Lakewood90712 08-07-2011 09:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Amethyst (Post 1097430)
You should not tell anybody who isn't a member of your personal fan club, with a lifetime's interest in having you succeed in absolutely everything. Everybody else is either uninterested, jealous, or will think you're strangely obsessed with money.

Or this board, which is specifically set up to let us discuss our strange money obsessions.

Amethyst

+ 1

Sarah in SC 08-07-2011 11:17 AM

For the record, after we had our mortgage burning party, we were not particularly inundated with requests for money or snide remarks about our supposed wealth, but I do have a friend who periodically suggests I pick up the bar tab because I have that "sticker" (she means my Dave Ramsey Debt Free sticker) on my car. I think (hope) she's joking!
But because I am in the biz, as it were, people would expect our finances to be in better shape because we should know better, I guess.

grasshopper 08-07-2011 11:28 AM

When I paid off my mortgage I asked a CPA in the building I worked to take a Looky Look. I had a spreadsheet showing, increase in assets, loss of itemized deduction and my net worth statement yada yada yada at age 44. He couldn't find a fault with the plan.

Of course every tax season I would hear the TurboTax jingle every 20 minutes. And I was always his bud after that

FIREd 08-07-2011 11:29 AM

Personally, I might share such accomplishment with my parents but I would otherwise keep it for myself. In these difficult economic times, I find that responses to economic successes are not always positive.


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