Developing a taste for luxury in retirement

[robbridg]

Once you taste the finer things of life, you can never, I mean never go back - so you better learn how to pay for them -

Totally disagree. Eventually you'll find that the 'finer things' don't really bring more happiness. Good luck though.

I'd trade all of my 'finer things' for more loving family and friends any time.

 

[MRG]

Totally disagree. Eventually you'll find that the 'finer things' don't really bring more happiness. Good luck though.

I'd trade all of my 'finer things' for more loving family and friends any time.

Agreed watched my FIL chase things, some very expensive, he never found happiness. You can't put prices on good family and friends.

MRG

 

[youbet]

Personally I'll take the concept of having both good family and friends and enough resources to enjoy some material things in life. They're definitely not mutually exclusive.

 

[explanade]

I've flown business class on long flights, from upgrading with miles.

But when I have to buy tickets, so far have resisted buying business or first class tickets.

I don't think even a 15-hour trip is worth paying 5 to 10 times as much as coach.

 

[CoolChange]

I am not sure this actually answers OP's question about my experience since I have not actually retired yet; but, I have developed a taste for some of the finer things in life, large Mangelsen prints and Nicholson Jones Cabernets are two that come immediately to mind.

However, the same frugal tendencies that have allowed me to reach FI continue to prevent me from actually spending money on these things to enjoy in my own home. I have no idea if having these things would actually make me any happier in the long run; but, I do know that I feel a certain sense of melancholy thinking about such things knowing that I am too [-]frugal [/-]cheap to purchase them for myself.

For the sake of my future financial stability, I do hope that my fear of buyer's remorse will continue to override my desire for these kinds of luxuries.

 

[someguy]

I think it's more about getting wiser in your spending and focusing it on things that matter the most. Those things may (will) vary from person to person. I spent quite a bit on my bike, for example, but I put more miles on it than on my car, so I've never even thought about second guessing that spend.

 

[someguy]

I've flown business class on long flights, from upgrading with miles.

But when I have to buy tickets, so far have resisted buying business or first class tickets.

I don't think even a 15-hour trip is worth paying 5 to 10 times as much as coach.

If you are flexible and patient, business class (or domestic first) can often be had for 2x-3x coach. If you're flying to big business cities on big work flying days, you'll get into the 5x+ range.

 

[youbet]

I'm worried I'll want these even more when I have more time to enjoy them in retirement.

What has been your experience?

There's definitely some truth to the concept that giving up "indulgences" is not always easy.

For example, here in the Chicago area dining at nicer restaurants, especially if you enjoy a cocktail before dinner and a nice wine with dinner, runs $60 - $100 per couple. (Of course, you can spend much more if desired.) If we go through a period where we're out frequently due to special events, friends in town visiting, etc., etc., we miss it when we cut back.

Another example is using handymen or tradesmen for projects around the house. For a number of reasons, all related to geezerhood, repair projects aren't as much fun as they used to be. I used a plumber to install a back up sump pump and replace a faucet shortly before we left for a trip last year. I liked the results. Now I need to replace an outdoor faucet which is dripping. I can do it. But it's hard to give up the luxury of picking up the phone and having someone else take care of it.

I try to enjoy the times we can afford to pay for luxuries and extras and, when we have to cut back, be glad we could afford them some of the time. It's not always easy.

 

[Midpack]

There's definitely some truth to the concept that giving up "indulgences" is not always easy.

For example, here in the Chicago area dining at nicer restaurants, especially if you enjoy a cocktail before dinner and a nice wine with dinner, runs $60 - $100 per couple. (Of course, you can spend much more if desired.) If we go through a period where we're out frequently due to special events, friends in town visiting, etc., etc., we miss it when we cut back.

Mentioned in an earlier post, but our solution has been to simply indulge less often for those finer things we really enjoy, not give them up entirely. We're also in Chicagoland, and we used to eat at high end restaurants literally every weekend. We still eat at the same high end restaurants (often much higher than your $ figures), but usually on special occasions now, and less even less in summer when there are so many other things to do outdoors. And when we do have a hankering for a great Chicago meal outside a special occasion once in a while, we don't deny ourselves.

We did give up some silly indulgences altogether and don't miss them at all (we look back and wonder who we were trying to impress)? But I don't think we could have given up all the finer things, and dining out is one of them. But we find we actually enjoy them more by not indulging as regularly as we used to. YMMV

 

[youbet]

Mentioned in an earlier post, but our solution has been to simply indulge less often for those finer things we really enjoy, not give them up entirely. We're also in Chicagoland, and we used to eat at high end restaurants literally every weekend.

That's a habit we never developed, thank goodness. But from time to time, we seem to have bursts of going out due to special events, travel, friends, etc.

And when we do have a hankering for a great Chicago meal outside a special occasion once in a while, we don't deny ourselves.

That's our issue. After dining out more frequently due to special occassions, invitations from friends, etc., we do find "denying ourselves" by cutting back is a tad "painful." That is, there is some truth to the adage that a period of indulgence is followed by a period of missing the indulgences when they need to be cut back. It's just part of life. OP will need to deal with the issue, but likely shoudn't give up the fun now.

We did give up some silly indulgences altogether

We've never really had the "silly indulgence" problem, at least by our definition of "silly indulgence."

But, to OP's point and question, if you use some surplus income to create some really good times, no doubt you're going to miss them if you have to cut back later. But, so what? If you are afraid to do anything that feels good because the good feeling will be missed when you stop, that would make for a sad life.

 

[MichaelB]

I'm not sure what constitutes a luxury, but we certainly restrained our spending during the working years and took every opportunity to save, not spend. Now, retired and approaching full fledged geezerhood we are spending more on ourselves than ever before, enjoying it and hope to continue.

Close family members from the previous generation that have passed all seemed to feel, when close to the end, that in their later years they had been too thrifty. We are right at 4% withdrawal at age 60, so I guess that means we are living at our means, perhaps a bit above, but not below. We have given the kids all that they need and then some, so we feel no obligation to hold down our spending on their behalf.

 

[eytonxav]

I've always had a taste for it, but sometimes the paying for it gets in the way. Nevertheless, we are finding quite a bit of satisfaction in decluttering and transitioning to a simpler life with less possessions.

 

[Helios]

Wisdom

Fired 55.5, 2007. First 5 years watched expenses very closely. Somewhere on this site, it was said that the skills used to fire, will protect you in er. But that you will never spend all of your money because you were so frugal. True wisdom!
I now coach travel to europe and spend some of my loot. I simply wont be around to enjoy it all. Dw is set up, no kids.
I can get ss soon(62), but planned to live without it and so will need to decide what to do with it. Maybe ease up and enjoy some less simple lux.

 

[Bestwifeever]

Getting rid of stuff and not getting more stuff: the biggest luxury of all! We are moving into experiences for any luxury fix we might need. Like many here, better groceries, a little upgraded travel experience once in a while, etc.

 

[explanade]

Do people dine out more or less after ER?

After all, a lot of the restaurant expenses is tied to work, like lunches of dinners when you've been too busy at work to prepare your own dinner?

Of course, this thread is discussing more the finer dining, though if one was regularly spending over $100 on a meal, that would make FI more difficult.

Certainly not something most of us are budgeting for as a regular expense in retirement?

 

[explanade]

If you are flexible and patient, business class (or domestic first) can often be had for 2x-3x coach. If you're flying to big business cities on big work flying days, you'll get into the 5x+ range.

I'll try tracking some business flights as well as coach.

However, I have a lot of miles to use up too, so ...

Plus there's lowest-price, non-refundable coach vs. full coach, which is often higher than non-refundable business.

 

[someguy]

I'll try tracking some business flights as well as coach.

However, I have a lot of miles to use up too, so ...

Plus there's lowest-price, non-refundable coach vs. full coach, which is often higher than non-refundable business.

We've flown in first across the US and in biz from the US to the Caribbean, UK and Europe for ~2X coach. The middle east, Asia, Africa and other places seem to be higher/harder.

We use miles quite often as well, but will pony up cash for business if required and if the flight is long enough.

 

[Midpack]

Do people dine out more or less after ER?

After all, a lot of the restaurant expenses is tied to work, like lunches of dinners when you've been too busy at work to prepare your own dinner?

Of course, this thread is discussing more the finer dining, though if one was regularly spending over $100 on a meal, that would make FI more difficult.

Certainly not something most of us are budgeting for as a regular expense in retirement?

No change in retirement for us WRT dining out. We scaled back dramatically before I retired, and continue with the same frequency now that I am retired. And FWIW we eat better/healthier at home now - without an increase in grocery spending.

 

[daylatedollarshort]

Do people dine out more or less after ER?

After all, a lot of the restaurant expenses is tied to work, like lunches of dinners when you've been too busy at work to prepare your own dinner?

Of course, this thread is discussing more the finer dining, though if one was regularly spending over $100 on a meal, that would make FI more difficult.

Certainly not something most of us are budgeting for as a regular expense in retirement?

We still have a small business, but work at home and don't have the mega-corp salaries any more so we are part way to full retirement.

DH no longer buys lunch out for work and we cut out most fast food since we are home to cook.

I budget $50 for going out three times a week for dinner or a movie. For movies we can go to the early matinee or use a Costco discount ticket. The local sports bar has free pool on off nights, Taco Tuesdays ($3 Magaritas!), and all sorts of specials for the off hours when other people have to work or get up for work the next day.

For eating out, the local Chinese restaurant has great lunches for $5.75 each, rice, entree, egg roll and soup. We use a lot of Entertainment coupons for other half off meals that end up costing around $14 total with tax and tip.

The library has free passes for local residents for events like plays, museums, a zoo, gardens, a mine, and an aircraft carrier. Some are major tourist attractions, so it is pretty cool we can go all sorts of places during the work day for free that other people pay for and see only on vacation.

Add in free days at the museums, free workshops and star gazing at the planetarium, reciprocal museum memberships, parks, beaches, tide pools, public archery ranges, bike trails, gardens, low cost hobby and social club meetings and events and we really can do a lot without spending much money at all.

 

[W2R]

Do people dine out more or less after ER?

After all, a lot of the restaurant expenses is tied to work, like lunches of dinners when you've been too busy at work to prepare your own dinner?

Of course, this thread is discussing more the finer dining, though if one was regularly spending over $100 on a meal, that would make FI more difficult.

Certainly not something most of us are budgeting for as a regular expense in retirement?

We eat lunch out every day now that we are retired, although our meals are more likely to be $5 or $6 including tip, than $100. Average for the past week, for example: $6.11 each, including tip.

We love lingering over lunch at our local Creole-Italian hole-in-the-wall restaurants, where they know us and treat us like family. It is great to have all the time in the world these days. The effect of this type of eating out on our spending is negligible.

 

[daylatedollarshort]

The only time we spend $100 on meals is when we are out with friends or family and go some place they suggest. But then many of them are under some kind of financial stress. A bottle of wine with dinner is great if you can afford it. But for many people we know they don't see the link between the bottle of wine and related spending habits and living with the constant worry of getting laid off because they aren't financially independent.

 

[W2R]

The only time we spend $100 on meals is when we are out with friends or family and go some place they suggest. But then many of them are under some kind of financial stress. A bottle of wine with dinner is great if you can afford it. But for many people we know they don't see the link between the bottle of wine and related spending habits and living with the constant worry of getting laid off because they aren't financially independent.

So true. I think the last time I ate a restaurant meal that cost over $100, was in 1972! Certainly no work related meal ever cost very much, even if paid with personal money, for reasons of avoiding the appearance of wrongdoing.

 

[explanade]

Well the pricing of wine at restaurants are a ripoff. Bottles are at least double the retail price.

 

[FIREd]

I have never been one to revere an ascetic lifestyle and I have always enjoyed small luxuries.

 

[someguy]

I have never been one to revere an ascetic lifestyle and I have always enjoyed small luxuries.

How would you quantify/define "small"? That is always my quandry.