Another pointless (family) rant...

[livingalmostlarge]

Now the next question is what the umbrella's color needs to be

well obviously black!

 

[DallasGuy]

We don’t want to go, but feel some family obligation. We have until Feb to RSVP. And we’ll probably live about 33,000 days, giving up 3-4 for a wedding we don’t want to attend isn’t the end of the world to avoid hard feelings?

As I've gotten older, I've put less and less energy into obligations. Life is to short to do "what's expected". Do what YOU want to!

I recently told a friend and his partner not to visit because I'm not comfortable "entertaining" them for the 3rd of 4th time because there isn't that much new to do here...too stressful. Perhaps I can meet them in a neutral location instead. Anyway, that's just one example of me doing what makes me happy and not what makes someone else happy.

 

[Markola]

Problem solved.

 

[Koolau]

Send regrets with a nice check and save the travel money for something else.

 

[Luvtoride]

Is the venue one that warrants black tie attire? We are attending a black tie wedding at the Pierre Hotel in NYC in November on a Saturday night. I was going to rent a tux but compared to the rental price I ended up buying a black suit for only a bit more than the rental would have cost. I own suspenders, bow-tie and I will buy a new white shirt. I’m sure there will be more black tie weddings of the Gen Z and Mellennial groups paid for by well-off Baby Boomer parents willing to BtD on such affairs. Who to blame

 

[skipro33]

Sounds like it'll be a hoot! Be sure to video the drama and post em up here when all the police reports are wrapped up. Ha!
I wouldn't miss it for the world!

 

[donheff]

I hear this all the time - imposition of obnoxious dress requirements, destination weddings, themes that can't possibly appeal to the extended family... I guess More Cowbell is right - social media. Speaking of which, I think I stumbled into the exclusive TikTok Group 7.

 

[Tadpole]

Just invited to the wedding of a distant niece, daughter of DW's sister who she has never liked. But we attend these weddings to see other family members we wouldn't see often otherwise. We haven't had much contact with the niece since she was a kid, and we've never met the groom.

So we were prepared to pay for airfare, rental car, hotel, wedding gifts, etc. But the invitation had another stipulation that has all the sibs up in arms - and we're not pleased either.

"The dress code for our wedding is Black Tie, all black attire. We prefer that gentlemen wear tuxedos, but black suits and tie are allowed, and ladies wear elegant black gowns or black formal dresses."

June wedding, rooftop outdoors in Dallas - in a black tuxedo…

WTH!

A couple sibs have already said they are not going - black tie undoubtedly part of their decisions but maybe not all. The rest of us men will probably rent tuxedos, but the women will have to buy 'elegant black gowns or black formal dresses' and some accessories?

We can afford it, so I guess we shouldn't complain - but that seems very odd nowadays. Gen Z's requiring black tie?

One use? Your local Goodwill type store probably has a black dress of some sort.

 

[pacergal]

Rental of tux and formal dresses are available in our town, if you did not want to buy.
Most women can use a LBD (little black dress), if you want to buy one, choose one that is sleeveless and have a shawl for hotter weather.

Hope you have a great time reconnecting and visiting with family.

 

[Koolau]

One use? Your local Goodwill type store probably has a black dress of some sort.

When we attended our daughter's wedding, she didn't like DW's outfit - the morning of the wedding! Color was fine, but DW had chosen a very stunning (dressy) pants outfit of the correct color. The "effect" of the outfit was that it was virtually a dress but in a pants. structure. I don't know fashion well enough to describe it otherwise. I thought it looked great.

So, in a town we did not know, DW and I went searching 4 hours before the wedding for the "perfect" dress in the right color. We stopped at a resale shop - not even a Goodwill - some no-name church oriented charity shop. DW found a nice dress which fit well (right color) and noticed the price was $10. Upon taking it to the check out, we learned that it was discounted to $5. When we arrived for the actually wedding, DD was thrilled.

So THAT is the story we recall most about DD's wedding - finding the perfect dress for 5 bucks. How typical for DW and me - cheap so-and-so's that we've always been.

 

[disneysteve]

I hear this all the time - imposition of obnoxious dress requirements

Maybe it's just me but I don't consider "black tie" to be an obnoxious dress requirement. I'm not put off by that at all for a nice affair. Now if they're having the wedding on the beach in the Caribbean somewhere and want it to be black tie, I'd find that a questionable choice, but not if it's being held in a venue worthy of getting dressed up.

 

[Midpack]

Maybe it's just me but I don't consider "black tie" to be an obnoxious dress requirement. I'm not put off by that at all for a nice affair. Now if they're having the wedding on the beach in the Caribbean somewhere and want it to be black tie, I'd find that a questionable choice, but not if it's being held in a venue worthy of getting dressed up.

On a rooftop in downtown Dallas in June...

 

[disneysteve]

On a rooftop in downtown Dallas in June...

Depends on the venue. If it's a nice place, sure. Is it a great idea? No. Is it at least in the evening?

 

[Midpack]

Depends on the venue. If it's a nice place, sure. Is it a great idea? No. Is it at least in the evening?

Not specified yet. "Weather permitting, our ceremony and cocktail hour will be outdoors on the rooftop, while the reception will take place indoors."

 

[disneysteve]

Not specified yet. "Weather permitting, our ceremony and cocktail hour will be outdoors on the rooftop, while the reception will take place indoors."

That sounds perfectly fine to me. At least the whole thing isn't outdoors. Black tie or not, I've been to plenty of summer weddings where it was hot outside for the ceremony but then the rest of the evening was inside. Wouldn't matter if I'm in a suit or a tux. They're both about the same.

 

[RetMD21]

Not specified yet. "Weather permitting, our ceremony and cocktail hour will be outdoors on the rooftop, while the reception will take place indoors."

Black tie would be gauche if it isn't evening.

 

[GrayHare]

Hmm, what would be this couple's investing style? Perhaps whatever is trendy and hot at the moment.

 

[disneysteve]

Hmm, what would be this couple's investing style? Perhaps whatever is trendy and hot at the moment.

Why do you think that? Does wanting to have a classy wedding correlate with one's investing style? We didn't go black tie for our wedding, though we considered it. It was a pretty upscale affair though.

 

[GrayHare]

It might, how are we to know otherwise? Sounds like a fun possibility given the trendy and hot comments in this thread. It also ties it to this board's main subject.

 

[Koolau]

Maybe it's just me but I don't consider "black tie" to be an obnoxious dress requirement. I'm not put off by that at all for a nice affair. Now if they're having the wedding on the beach in the Caribbean somewhere and want it to be black tie, I'd find that a questionable choice, but not if it's being held in a venue worthy of getting dressed up.

Agree it's not obnoxious but I no longer own a tie - black or otherwise. Don't own a tux OR a suit either, so there's that.

 

[Koolau]

Hmm, what would be this couple's investing style? Perhaps whatever is trendy and hot at the moment.

I'd guess "Invest whatever's left over at the end of the month??" IOW pocket change.

 

[DrRoy]

We just attended the wedding of DW's nephew, with a suggested dress code for a day before party and the wedding day. It was all casual, and we did not think too much of it. I wore a couple old shirts that fit the ask and bought a new pair of nice pants. DW is often happy for an excuse to clothes shop. This was not as expensive as your case.

 

[ncbill]

Told the kids if they decided on a destination wedding I'd be happy to...watch via Zoom.

Had to buy a new suit for a wedding a couple of years ago, no plans to ever buy another.

 

[big-papa]

Told the kids if they decided on a destination wedding I'd be happy to...watch via Zoom.

Had to buy a new suit for a wedding a couple of years ago, no plans to ever buy another.

Can't even remember the last time I owned a suit. What normally happened is that between needs for one, styles change or (more likely) my body changed and I had to buy another one.

Ultimately, I ended up with a sports coat - tweed and very professorial looking. You can say that it never goes of style or, perhaps, it's always been out of style. That, a dress shirt, sometimes a tie, and a black pair of slacks and some dress shoes has served me well for quite a long time.

I come from a large family but am way past the siblings and niece/nephews getting married stage at this point. And I haven't even met all of my great nieces/nephews. I guess our friend group's kids are probably next in line, if they even choose to go that route. Beyond that, we're at the stage of life where it's more about funerals than weddings anyway.

Cheers.

 

[mystang52]

The invite says, in so many words, that black tie/tux is optional. I've attended a couple of these in the past and my black suit was fine. I have no idea what DW wore, but some sort of black dress. I don't think you need to rent a tux, and I have a very strong suspicion that your very attendance would be appreciated.