didn't used to bother me....

Right, and what's really ironic is that my hearing is really getting bad - yet loud "noise" bothers me unlike when I was young and had good hearing. What's up with that?

I think it's because the training your brain did to filter out unwanted noise when you had good hearing doesn't work when your hearing goes bad. My boyfriend has fantastic hearing and is rarely bothered by noise, but I am, despite having profound loss in one ear and moderate to severe loss in the other ear.

I also think it has to do with the fact that I'm always trying to hear everything I can, but that includes noises I don't actually want to hear. I am simply unable to "ignore" unwanted noise any more, and it suuuuuucks.

However, here's an interesting phenomenon when it comes to being bothered by noise. We live in an RV and there's one place we stay for extended periods of time--at a truck driving school. So they're firing up giant diesel engines all the time, and driving around in the parking lot practicing, and it doesn't bother me at all because that noise is supposed to be there.

But if I'm staying in an RV park where there's a barking dog next door, it drives me insane, because that noise doesn't have to be there.

Same with being out and about. We almost never eat in table-service restaurants because I like to pick where to sit and be able to move if somebody is annoying. Like someone watching a video on his phone with the sound on. Somehow I can hear that from across the room, and a conversation between two people at that volume wouldn't bother me but the sound from the phone makes me almost homicidal. Because two people talking is supposed to happen, but watching videos with the sound on doesn't have to happen.
 
My theory on the lower tolerance for annoyances is that we don't put up with it because we don't have to. We're not pressed for time, and if one store is annoying for whatever reason, we'll just leave and either go to another or more likely just go home and order online.
This makes sense and I think it explains much of the intolerance many of us deal with. I think it also explains many of the comments in the Pet Peeves thread. We have the time to put up with things like poor service anda rude behavior, but not the necessity. We also are less concerned about offending others.

I have a different theory about noise. We’re aging and losing our hearing, but the loss is not uniform. We hear low frequency sounds predominant in movies and music very well, better than higher frequency sounds like human voices. That makes speech harder to discern. It’s a real challenge in movie theater, restaurants, and watching tv shows with lots of action sequences.
 
Traffic.... When I lived and worked in Houston for 50+ years, I had no choice but to accept, the idiotic, rude, reckless, careless, drivers. After 15 years of living and driving in the open rural countryside, I can't stand to drive into big cities anymore. When I do, I begin to think about and understand the movie "Unhinged" a lot better.
 
However, here's an interesting phenomenon when it comes to being bothered by noise. We live in an RV and there's one place we stay for extended periods of time--at a truck driving school. So they're firing up giant diesel engines all the time, and driving around in the parking lot practicing, and it doesn't bother me at all because that noise is supposed to be there.

But if I'm staying in an RV park where there's a barking dog next door, it drives me insane, because that noise doesn't have to be there.

Same with being out and about. We almost never eat in table-service restaurants because I like to pick where to sit and be able to move if somebody is annoying. Like someone watching a video on his phone with the sound on. Somehow I can hear that from across the room, and a conversation between two people at that volume wouldn't bother me but the sound from the phone makes me almost homicidal. Because two people talking is supposed to happen, but watching videos with the sound on doesn't have to happen.

Yes, this point has the ring of truth.
 
Yeap. Girlfriend and I used to sit at the coffee shops 3-4 mornings a week. We finally got too tired of asking them turn the music down, so now we get a coffee to go and sit on the couch at home (with a fireplace screensaver playing on the tv :LOL: ).

I think you do get used to the quiet, but I also think something happened in the last 5 years or so where retailers equate loud music with better sales or something.

Reminds me; our Albertsons has started playing BTO's "Takin' care of business" every morning at 9:00 sharp. This is right about the time we get there. So now we wait in car until 9:05, to shop. :p I'm guessing it's some sort thing to rev up the employees:confused:
I love it that our rebellious hard core Rock and Roll music has a become commonplace background music in stores and is used in so many TV and radio commercials.

And if your train's on time, you can get to work by nine
And start your slavin' jobs and get your pay
If you ever get annoyed, look at me, I'm self-employed
I love to work at nothing all day

It is a song of celebration of loving what he's doing with the right bunch of fellows.
 
I love it that our rebellious hard core Rock and Roll music has a become commonplace background music in stores and is used in so many TV and radio commercials.

And if your train's on time, you can get to work by nine
And start your slavin' jobs and get your pay
If you ever get annoyed, look at me, I'm self-employed
I love to work at nothing all day

It is a song of celebration of loving what he's doing with the right bunch of fellows.
Here's a great story by Randy Bachman, the author of TCB. Kinda long but interesting if you're a Bachman Turner Overdrive fan.


Sorry (But not too sorry) for the thread drift, er, hijack.
 
I take AirPods with me if I’m going to be stuck in a waiting room.

Fortunately our grocery store music is definitely background.
That's the thing; it's just that one d*mn song at the same time of day. Once it's over, it's the regular background music. Strange.
One of the advantages of not dining in is not putting up with a noisy, busy place.
We gave up on (sit down) restaurants quite awhile ago (though we adore takeout at In-N-Out). I'd always end up feeling trapped when done eating, waiting for the server to come give me the check. We started making it a habit to ask for the check when our food came. Exhausting
 
Here's a great story by Randy Bachman, the author of TCB. Kinda long but interesting if you're a Bachman Turner Overdrive fan.


Sorry (But not too sorry) for the thread drift, er, hijack.
Nooo!! Make it stop!! :ROFLMAO:
 
One car is an EV - seldom take my second car to a gas station, but now the dirty pumps, lines and smells stand out.
I also hate the look and smell of a gas pump. But guess what? No EV at this point. Now days, I drive a very little distance to nearby groceries and eventually to doctor appointment. I already forgot how gas station look like, as I did not stop there for a couple of months :wiseone:
 
Very little irritates me these days, and most of the irritations that do occur last only a few seconds. At 67, I remind myself that my financial and "control of my time" situation is better than probably 95% of the people I encounter. Those two items tend to be the root cause of many peoples problems. So I am more likely to give others grace. Probably the only irritations that occur is when I see someone I perceive is being mistreated, especially service people.

I do not mind traffic or crowds at Walmart, I have owned their stock since the 1990s. I still remember one holiday season where I was on a long checkout line, and a woman ahead of me turned and asked "isn't this just annoying?" My reply was "I am okay, I won Walmart stock, so I am happy when they are busy". She looked very confused at my statement. I chalked it up to lack of financial literacy :).

Noixe does not bother me, I seem to be able to tune it out pretty easily. I attribute that to my DJ days trying to cue and mix records while the current music is going strong 😂.
 
Very little irritates me these days, and most of the irritations that do occur last only a few seconds. At 67, I remind myself that my financial and "control of my time" situation is better than probably 95% of the people I encounter. Those two items tend to be the root cause of many peoples problems. So I am more likely to give others grace. Probably the only irritations that occur is when I see someone I perceive is being mistreated, especially service people.

I do not mind traffic or crowds at Walmart, I have owned their stock since the 1990s. I still remember one holiday season where I was on a long checkout line, and a woman ahead of me turned and asked "isn't this just annoying?" My reply was "I am okay, I won Walmart stock, so I am happy when they are busy". She looked very confused at my statement. I chalked it up to lack of financial literacy :).

Noixe does not bother me, I seem to be able to tune it out pretty easily. I attribute that to my DJ days trying to cue and mix records while the current music is going strong 😂.
I do envy you but I realize issues of irritation are more a matter of attitude than circumstances. I'm w*rking on my attitude and am making some progress.

To a great extent, happiness (IOW not letting things irritate) is a choice. Choose to let things bother you and they will. I'm trying to choose NOT to let things bother me.

I'm doing better - sometimes.:blush:
 
I find that I am less stressed as I age. I always leaned liberal, more so now after 13 years of retirement.

Things that seemed important years ago are now relatively meaningless to me. I am much more laissez faire than I was even though I was brought up in that environment.

DW had not experienced this to the same extent as me. For me, most annoyances are water off a ducks back to me. Could not care less. I simply tune them out! I guess that I make a choice not to let things over which I have no control bother me.
 
For me, most annoyances are water off a ducks back to me. Could not care less. I simply tune them out! I guess that I make a choice not to let things over which I have no control bother me.
That's where I hope to end up. Life is too short.
 
When I sit outside to meditate, there are all kinds of sounds. I remember in my thirties, when I was first getting into meditation, I wouldn't even try to sit when the lawn services were active, or some other "noisey thing" was around. But now I don't let that influence me. I live in a suburb. There's always mechanical noise. There's always natural noise. Cars, sirens, aircraft, mowers, blowers, chain saws, birds, crickets, wind, babbling creek water. Any sound is fine. No sound is fine. No matter what sound is there one instant, it will change.
 
I have left a restaurant without ordering after asking them to turn down the music and they didn't turn down the music enough. Just last night, I asked a server in another restaurant to move us to another table as one of the speakers was right above our table and the music was too loud. I have also left a restaurant without ordering when one of the lights in the room was flickering and it bothered me.

I was never like this when I was younger, not even 5 years ago. It's not like my hearing got better in old age.

Maybe I'm more set in my ways? I hope that's not the case as I want to be flexible, but I still want to eat in an enjoyable environment.

Maybe the problem I'm having as I'm getting older is that small things start to bother me as they make me kind of lose my focus. It's like they make it harder for me to think, or concentrate somehow.
I wrote the above post yesterday. I talked about how music in restaurants bothered me a lot.

I want to add something to it as I went to a pub with some friends after playing some volleyball last night, and the music was beyond loud, and everyone was loud too, probably because the music was loud and they couldn't hear each other, but you know what? The music didn't bother me at all! Maybe music without any other noise bothers me more?? (A few people mentioned the noise of a fan (most likely in a quiet room.)) I don't really know the reason why, but I was kind of glad that the loud music or loud everything didn't bother me, except that I couldn't hear what my friends were saying that well, and I had to talk so loud that my voice was hoarse this morning.
 
Next week after work I'm having some friends over for elk tenderloin in my work shop. No noise at all. A little social hour and time to catch up. We are all retired firefighters, a couple are also Iraq/Afganistan vets.


I am the old man in the group that makes this happen. Beats any bar or restaurant in the world.
 
I enjoy pure silence now more than ever. Maybe some birds chirping, squirrels running through leaves, and a slight wind. I get that everyday in the back yard.

But I still enjoy the roar of a NASCAR restart in person ( but now headphones help)
 
I enjoy pure silence now more than ever. Maybe some birds chirping, squirrels running through leaves, and a slight wind. I get that everyday in the back yard.

But I still enjoy the roar of a NASCAR restart in person ( but now headphones help)
RANT ON:
Not to derail this thread but NASCAR (and F1 and Indy car too for that matter) restarts really aren't fair. Example, so lets say after 25 laps or so, the guy in first place might be a half a lap ahead when the yellow flag comes out for whatever reason, but when they stack them up and restart, he is "maybe" 5 feet ahead at best. That half lap lead is lost. :nonono: The only way to keep what you've gained, is to lap the field (very hard to do)
RANT OFF
 
I do envy you but I realize issues of irritation are more a matter of attitude than circumstances. I'm w*rking on my attitude and am making some progress.

To a great extent, happiness (IOW not letting things irritate) is a choice. Choose to let things bother you and they will. I'm trying to choose NOT to let things bother me.

I'm doing better - sometimes.:blush:
We have gotten very good at simply avoiding situations that annoy us.
 
I believe that my attitude is in part due to my work life. Lots of noise from many sides. Employees, customers, puzzle palace. I had to learn to separate the wheat from the chaff and focus on things that were relevant, that I could impact, and that would move me closer to my goals. And ignore the rest.

On the downside...if I am reading or engaged in something that demand my attention/focus will not even hear my spouse when she speaks to me.

Not intentional, I just tune things out when I am focussed I choose to do so.
 
I'm on the opposite end. I'm able to filter out distractions.

But I do know it's out there. Because DW or friends will say "how can you stand that.....". And that's usually the first time I notice it.
 
I used to think my desired super power was invisibility, but ability to filter out distractions is waaaay better.
Invisibility. Yeah, that could be handy. Then again, it was common at Megacorp. Once you turned 50, you began to fade away.
 
I'm on the opposite end. I'm able to filter out distractions.

But I do know it's out there. Because DW or friends will say "how can you stand that.....". And that's usually the first time I notice it.
That's why I avoid the "pet peeves" thread. I'm sure I'd pick-up on something that I never noticed before and be burdened by the thought "You know what, that IS annoying!" This thread is just a sneaky "pet peeves" look-alike. I think I better leave before I find things that formerly didn't annoy me.
 
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