Does the age you retire early make a difference in how others see you?

[Midpack]

So mostly, I don't get negative comments from it.

I was curious because I occasionally read things from people who do get negative comments. Why is it that some people get negative comments and others don't?

When I first retired early if someone asked, I’d just laugh it off and change the subject. I don’t remember anyone pushing it further.

Reactions like this probably explain why some people provoke negative comments.

I would answer!
Oh it was easy, I just lived below my income and invested my savings in the S&P 500 for XX years.
Want to know more?

 

[audreyh1]

I was always very careful not to brag. I knew how unusual our situation was and that we were very lucky. Sure, we made the most of it but we were still darned lucky.

 

[aja8888]

One good thing about retiring a bit late (for this place) like me is no one knows much about why you ended up like that or even how you managed to retire at all. A few of my friends do, and my daughter, for sure. Heck, my only living sister doesn't know or doesn't care (I am sure about that).

The story is not pleasant and I don't even like THINKING about it, let alone talking about it.

But we (now me) are OK and that's what I care about. I don't give a rats @$$ about what others think, or wonder about me, PERIOD!

Oh, and with a couple of exceptions, all my friends are much better off financially than me ( a couple of guys are extremely wealthy). And we don't talk about finances nor do we "brag" about how we got there. And as a group of friends we are very active together, either playing golf, going on local trips, having group lunches, you name it. This is for the last 20 years or so. That's what counts to me.

 

[TheWizard]

I was always very careful not to brag. I knew how unusual our situation was and that we were very lucky. Sure, we made the most of it but we were still darned lucky.

Lucky or just planned and invested properly?
Lucky is when you win the lottery, or maybe when you buy 1000 shares of Microsoft or FB at IPO.
So anyway...

 

[Happy Homebody]

One good thing about retiring a bit late (for this place) like me is no one knows much about why you ended up like that or even how you managed to retire at all. A few of my friends do, and my daughter, for sure. Heck, my only living sister doesn't know or doesn't care (I am sure about that).

The story is not pleasant and I don't even like THINKING about it, let alone talking about it.

But we (now me) are OK and that's what I care about. I don't give a rats @$$ about what others think, or wonder about me, PERIOD!

Oh, and with a couple of exceptions, all my friends are much better off financially than me ( a couple of guys are extremely wealthy). And we don't talk about finances nor do we "brag" about how we got there. And as a group of friends we are very active together, either playing golf, going on local trips, having group lunches, you name it. This is for the last 20 years or so. That's what counts to me.

That reminds me of another issue of people who retired early. It is not always voluntary. And sometimes there are complicated situations that make it semi voluntary.

Not everyone in these situations are in a good place financially. So people might not automatically assume you are well off.

 

[TickTock]

Lucky or just planned and invested properly?

Luck plays a significant role in wealth accumulation for those planning and investing properly. For example, a person with a constant real income over 30 years, saving 15% of income per year, invested 50/50 in S&P500 and intermediate-term government bonds has an average accumulation at the end of those 30 years of 10.1x their final salary. For historical rolling 30-year periods from 1926-2016, minimum accumulation was 5.2x and maximum was 17.2x. The year the career started can make a 3.3x difference between maximum and minimum. (Source: How Much Can I Spend In Retirement, Wade Pfau, 2017, Exhibit 3.4 and accompanying discussion.)

There are plenty of nits that can be picked in the above assumptions, but the point is that luck (when the career started) plays a significant role.

I'm not discounting proper planning, hard work, persistence, and investing. "The harder I work, the luckier I get." I'm saying that IMO most folks underestimate the role that luck plays.

 

[Markola]

We semi-retired at 54 using the Rule of 55. Saying “we are semi-retired” is received a little differently than retired early. Regardless, one should look for opportunities to grow the muscle of doing what one wants to, without regard to what others think or say. We are sensible people, so our true friends supported us, as we would support them in their endeavors.

Now, at 59 and 62, nearly everyone our age is retiring or wants to.

 

[Winemaker]

I saved up to 16% in my company's then investment/401k plan from the day I started in 1981. They matched dollar for dollar for 6%. DW and I contributed to tIRAs and Roths to the max until we retired in 2014. We paid for our retirement first, should have retired 5 years earlier but that's a different story. DW was always I'd get killed in the coal mines, so we saved. Kids never missed a cent or a fun thing as a family. So blessed by the grace of God.

 

[lionfire]

I just dont talk about it. If the topic comes up, I say I am taking a break from work.

 

[Koolau]

Lucky or just planned and invested properly?
Lucky is when you win the lottery, or maybe when you buy 1000 shares of Microsoft or FB at IPO.
So anyway...

Yeah, I recall people responding to my FIRE as "You are so lucky!" I would respond that "Luck had little to do with it."

I began saving toward FI from the first day at Megacorp. I wasn't a very good investor, but I did save early and often.

 

[TheWizard]

Yeah, I recall people responding to my FIRE as "You are so lucky!" I would respond that "Luck had little to do with it."

I began saving toward FI from the first day at Megacorp. I wasn't a very good investor, but I did save early and often.

Same here.

I think that invoking luck in polite conversation is more disarming, less confrontational than saying: I saved and invested 15% of my gross income from day one of employment, increasing annually to over 30% before I retired a while ago...

 

[CO-guy]

Since I still consult part-time, when people ask what I do I just tell them I'm a consultant.

 

[youbet]

There is a couple living behind our house who work to make sure they never have to talk to me. I suspect it is because they are about 10 years older than my wife and I and still working full-time, including evening hours.

Your "suspicion" that your neighbors avoid you because they're older and still working likely misses the target. The fact that you think that way about them is obvious and surely not something they'd want to engage with. Instead of holding yourself aloof and demeaning them, why not just accept them for who they are and respect their choices/situation?

 

[imjustawarrior]

Same here.

I think that invoking luck in polite conversation is more disarming, less confrontational than saying: I saved and invested 15% of my gross income from day one of employment, increasing annually to over 30% before I retired a while ago...

I try to disarm by pointing out that I started working when I was 8, and I simply had worked long enough. Then I point out that I would rather eat rice and beans for the rest of my life rather than going back to w*rk. This has worked well for me. People then tend to sympathize with me.

All of that is true. I am not one to lie or even tell a white lie.

 

[Happy Homebody]

Same here.

I think that invoking luck in polite conversation is more disarming, less confrontational than saying: I saved and invested 15% of my gross income from day one of employment, increasing annually to over 30% before I retired a while ago...

People have told me I am lucky to have had a job with a pension. But it isn't random luck that I got a job with a pension. I applied for a job with pension.

Actually, I applied for lots of government jobs before getting my first one. And my first government job was a low paying job in a high cost of living area. But that allowed me to slowly work my way up to a decent paying job.

I also moved across the country because the job market was bad in my hometown. So I am not "lucky" to live in a place with a good job market.

We sell ourselves short when we call our success lucky. But it seems like if we say we earned it with hard work and sacrifice, people react negativity.

It is sometimes easier to try and chose the answer least likely to annoy people.

 

[audreyh1]

Well for us luck did have a lot to do with it so I readily agree to the luck part even though I was smart about many things.

 

[OddGuy]

At 58, I'm FI but not yet RE. However, I'm at the point with my self-employment where I only take assignments that interest me and those with people I want to work with. So, much of the time, I'm semi-retired. And when I work, I mainly work from home, wearing whatever I want and putting in hours when I want.

So, I've found different people react to me in different ways.

When I go to doctor appointments at 10 am on a weekday (scheduled to avoid the morning rush), I'm asked "Are you still working?"

When I go to the supermarket for a quick grab-and-go lunch in the middle of the work-from-home day, I'm asked if I qualify for the Senior Discount (I never take offense, as the cashiers are typically 19 or so.)

When I'm on an airplane in First Class on a domestic flight, and a chatty businessman type seatmate wants to chat me up with "So, what do you do?" in hopes of "making a contact", I answer "I'm in Project Management" (an immediate conversation killer) before quickly putting in my earbuds and sticking on a movie. (My work overlaps sports and television, so once that comes to light, EVERYONE wants to talk about my work, except me.)

And when orthopedists, physical therapists, etc, ask what kind of work I do, I say "Computers", which is a perfect catch-all that also avoids the "What do you do?" trap.

So I think when I do fully retire, I'll still rotate between "project management" and "computers", because people naturally switch to more interesting conversation once they hear either answer.

 

[FIREd]

I retired in my 30’s. I haven’t experienced much negativity from other people. First, I don’t advertise that I am retired. And second, as an introvert and a homebody I don’t stand out that much. That said, I’m used to doing things differently and getting criticized for it.

 

[audreyh1]

I retired in my 30’s. I haven’t experienced much negativity from other people. First, I don’t advertise that I am retired. And second, as an introvert and a homebody I don’t stand out that much. That said, I’m used to doing things differently and getting criticized for it.

That all fits, ha ha.

Just a couple of days ago I got the “are you retired? You look to young to be retired!” comment at a small 55+ community gathering. I was pretty flabbergasted - hadn’t heard that in a long time. And me now 65 and DH 70 it was a surprise. I think when the shock wore off I mumbled something about DH being 70. I don’t even color my hair either, ha ha.

 

[thod]

Be careful about this:

And when orthopedists, physical therapists, etc, ask what kind of work I do, I say "Computers", which is a perfect catch-all that also avoids the "What do you do?" trap.

I think they might be asking to determine if anything work related might be related to the condition you are complaining about. Do you sit all day? Are you standing alot? Are you lifting heavy stuff? etc.

 

[pacergal]

I didn't retire too early (age 60), but I had grey hair since age 16.
And by 50 had a full head of grey, so was getting "do you want a senior discount?" at most stores/restaurants. So I said Sure!

 

[427Vette]

I owned a small blue collar business in a small rural town. It seems my financial situation was always under others microscope. Every time I bought a new piece of equipment or work vehicle I’d get snarky comments. When I retired at 49 I didn’t get to many negative comments but I heard lots of rumors of what people were saying. It’s a good thing I really don’t care what people think.

 

[Onda]

No, but the company I retired from does.

 

[Jimmie]

I retired 5 years ago at 61, once I paid the mortgage off. In reality, I could have retired 5 years earlier, but still enjoyed working so I kept at it. We had a big reorg in my dept when I was 59 and was given a job that I knew I would hate, but stayed on because of my relationship with my megacorp boss. However, I admit the last year was the slowest of my career from time perspective. I gave my boss 4 months notice to allow plenty of time for finding my replacement. Almost immediately after the announcement of my retirement notice, I was hearing snide remarks from some people (both in person & behind my back) about how "lucky" I was to able to retire. Some didn't believe it and speculated I was going to work somewhere else, but didn't want anyone to know where. One older secretary actually became hostile because she didn't have the financials to be able to ever retire (her words not mine) and hated me for being able to retire at my age. I just kept my head down, installed a countdown timer on my laptop, and completed the successful transition to my successor. I haven't missed work at all and once my DW retired last year, we've been really enjoying life right now.

 

[Out of Steam]

Your "suspicion" that your neighbors avoid you because they're older and still working likely misses the target. The fact that you think that way about them is obvious and surely not something they'd want to engage with. Instead of holding yourself aloof and demeaning them, why not just accept them for who they are and respect their choices/situation?

I pride myself on getting along with people, including those who others find difficult. This is simply a neighborhood where we haven't fit in socially. I'm glad we get along with most of our immediate neighbors, but don't have any expectations of others.