Have been kind of blue today as an old friend and his wife, whom I had sensed were sort of pulling away, gave me a piece of their minds this weekend --a cold shower really -- over my being an ER.
Seems they are both struggling in their own careers to make ends meet, save for college, etc etc. , and rather than feeling 'great at least somebody got free' their feelings are more aptly desribed as envy and resentment, with a new feeling mixed in: ER is somehow morally wrong or at least a slap in the face to the rest of us who are working.
We talked about it enough for me to know this is the only issue between us: they went on at great length about how almost nobody could afford to do this, that it was only applicable to a tiny tiny minority and that all my statistics about millionaires were somehow bogus. That advocating ER as a lifestyle choice and something to plan for or strive for was akin to advocating people to become heirs and heiresses: it just wan't within the realm of what an individual could control or aspire to, and was just 'luck' and by extension it was unseemly to discuss one's luck or recommend somebody else to 'get lucky'.
Explaining that 'avocations are different -- you guys love what you are doing so you don't need ER' only buried me conclusively deeper. (One is a journalist and the other a community health activist/analyst in a second career).
Explains why they haven't wanted to see us for the past few years...
Anybody encountered this one? I am used to incredulity, wonder, a bit of healthy envy when people discuss ER, but not the outright resentment and coldness.
Oh well, can't please everybody, but I did always like these two: (we owned a sailboat together years ago and had lots of good times railing against the Establishment and sailing around on weekend afternoons). Anybody got any advice? (Besides just shut up about ER and fake it like you're a slave like everybody else?)
ESRBob
Seems they are both struggling in their own careers to make ends meet, save for college, etc etc. , and rather than feeling 'great at least somebody got free' their feelings are more aptly desribed as envy and resentment, with a new feeling mixed in: ER is somehow morally wrong or at least a slap in the face to the rest of us who are working.
We talked about it enough for me to know this is the only issue between us: they went on at great length about how almost nobody could afford to do this, that it was only applicable to a tiny tiny minority and that all my statistics about millionaires were somehow bogus. That advocating ER as a lifestyle choice and something to plan for or strive for was akin to advocating people to become heirs and heiresses: it just wan't within the realm of what an individual could control or aspire to, and was just 'luck' and by extension it was unseemly to discuss one's luck or recommend somebody else to 'get lucky'.
Explaining that 'avocations are different -- you guys love what you are doing so you don't need ER' only buried me conclusively deeper. (One is a journalist and the other a community health activist/analyst in a second career).
Explains why they haven't wanted to see us for the past few years...
Anybody encountered this one? I am used to incredulity, wonder, a bit of healthy envy when people discuss ER, but not the outright resentment and coldness.
Oh well, can't please everybody, but I did always like these two: (we owned a sailboat together years ago and had lots of good times railing against the Establishment and sailing around on weekend afternoons). Anybody got any advice? (Besides just shut up about ER and fake it like you're a slave like everybody else?)
ESRBob