Mental and emotional recovery after retirement

[goodtogo]

I was a deputy sheriff just shy of 30 years. Took quite a while to decompress. Still have some PTSD but it is what it is. Happy to be alive, healthy and active!

 

[Closet_Gamer]

I caught up with a colleague who is still working at my old megacorp. He shared with me all of the drama and nonsense.

I consider it a victory that while I still know all of the players and the situation, the conversation caused me zero stress.

No flashbacks.
No “why don’t WE do xyz”

Just someone else’s problem!

 

[Christopher13]

You’re absolutely in the right place, and what you’re feeling is very real. I retired recently, and it honestly took me a few months to come down from the constant stress of work. I expected relief right away, but my body and mind stayed on high alert for a while. Yes, it takes time—but you can help the process. Here’s what worked for me: Light structure: Daily walks, small routines—not intense, just enough to feel steady. Take care of your body: Stress lives in the body too. Stretching, long showers, even just breathing deeply helped more than I expected. Talk it out: It might not feel like a “therapy” issue, but chatting with someone helped me realize I wasn’t broken—I was just burned out. Be patient: It took about 4–6 months before I felt like myself again. The stress unwinds in layers. And yeah—fun stuff helps, but don’t force it. Sometimes healing looks like rest, not adventure. You’re not alone.

 

[badatmath]

I am sorry for your situation. A lack of security would stress most people.

I guess you have looked into w*rking, and it just isn't feasible? Maybe you have posted about this before, but if you have not, maybe you should start a thread. There are a lot of smart people around here who may be able to help.

Perhaps some day. Thank you.

 

[Happy Homebody]

Thank you everyone. I am fortunate that I had several hobbies before retirement, so I have things to do. I am pondering the question of whether what I planned to do in my retirement is really what I wanted.

I am not an adventurous person, so I didn't have big plans. I do a lot of very simply crochet patterns. I had various plans like trying some intermediate level crochet patterns. Right now I do feel up to the challenge.

I may feel like it later. I might not. I think I will just take it easy for awhile and decide later.

Just give myself permission to not do much.

 

[Koolau]

Thank you everyone. I am fortunate that I had several hobbies before retirement, so I have things to do. I am pondering the question of whether what I planned to do in my retirement is really what I wanted.

I am not an adventurous person, so I didn't have big plans. I do a lot of very simply crochet patterns. I had various plans like trying some intermediate level crochet patterns. Right now I do feel up to the challenge.

I may feel like it later. I might not. I think I will just take it easy for awhile and decide later.

Just give myself permission to not do much.

I think you've got this!

 

[deserat]

Thank you everyone. I am fortunate that I had several hobbies before retirement, so I have things to do. I am pondering the question of whether what I planned to do in my retirement is really what I wanted.

I am not an adventurous person, so I didn't have big plans. I do a lot of very simply crochet patterns. I had various plans like trying some intermediate level crochet patterns. Right now I do feel up to the challenge.

I may feel like it later. I might not. I think I will just take it easy for awhile and decide later.

Just give myself permission to not do much.

+100 on the crochet...I alternate between simple patterns and challenging ones...gotta use up those scraps! The scrap afghans end up being some of my best outside some seriously challenging kits I have by Jane Crowfoot. I have five projects going and hope to finish them all before I start probably one of my most challenging-an afghan based on a Roman Bath...all different squares when put together have the layout of a Roman Bath...I'm excited but nervous....I found the rhythmic use of the hook is soothing and helps relieve stress...add exercise and some reading. I do travel a bit, too, but always bring some crochet to work on....

 

[Allytx]

I retired 10 yrs ago from a very high stress job. Now I do whatever I want and I mostly have peace of mind. Occasionally, like yesterday, I have a terrible dream of going back to work and re-entering all the stressful situations again. When I wake up, it sure makes me appreciate my retirement!

 

[RetiredandReady]

I hope this is the right place to talk about mental and emotional health.

I have heard people talk about it often taking around six month to unwind and recover after their job.

My last couple months at work were very stressful, but before that I was also dealing with "normal" workplace stress and burnout.

Is this something that just happens naturally? Are there things you can do to help the process along? Or is it mostly just relaxing and doing fun stuff?

It doesn't really seem like a therapy kind of thing. Stressful things make me stressed. It isn't an issue to work through.

Totally get where you’re coming from. I went through something similar after leaving a high-stress job. For me, the decompression wasn’t automatic—it took time and intention. What helped most was getting into a steady routine that included simple things like walks, journaling, and saying “no” without guilt. It wasn’t about fixing anything, just giving my mind room to breathe. It’s okay if it doesn’t feel like therapy-worthy stress—it still takes a toll, and rest is a real kind of work too.

 

[street]

Yes, totally the right place to visit about recovery from the stressful work years. Many topics on the subject since I been here.

My total decompression took about one year. I had plenty to things that I retired to so staying busy wasn't a problem. The problem for me was having the job still on my mind when I did have idle time.
After 9 of FIRE in just a couple of weeks I consider myself a pro at this retirement thing.

 

[pacergal]

The nice thing about retirement is that you can usually change plans on a daily basis!
Do what you desire on a daily basis.
Even eight years in, DH and I still talk about work and I keep in touch with some co workers.
I did go back on call for a few years also.
But any work related stress seemed to melt away fairly quickly.

 

[Redbugdave]

I planned for years about retirement and set myself up to be right on schedule at my earliest date for full benefits. And I did...now 11 years ago. Even for me there was a bit of adjustment. I guess with everyone there is to some extent.

It is very important to push yourself and do new things outside of your comfort zone. You will meet new people doing it, too. Pretty soon you will discover a new wonderful world out there just waiting on you. Also, life needs purpose...and like when I was working...I always make lists of what I want to accomplish for each day. For me tomorrow's list is already there. But the neat thing of being retired I can change my day on a whim. I can live just like my dog...totally in the present. I think it must be like the lives of those super rich people that never had to work for a living with the silver spoon in their mouth. Guess what? You now have a silver spoon! We are better off than 99% of the others and what the economy does means nothing.