My new life is beginning

Condolences on your loss. I know how indescribably hard it is to be a caregiver. It's wonderful that you took the steps to prepare for the next phase of life. Best wishes as you enter that new phase. I hope the community is a great fit and that you find your people there quickly.
 
Braumeister, I am sorry for your loss.

Is your new place out of state from your old home? If so, how did you chose it?
 
My deepest condolences for your loss.

It's great that you have found a place in a new community. 1500 sqft is a comfortable amount of space and hopefully it serves you well. Wishing you all the best!
 
Braumeister, my husband died of brain cancer 22 months ago and I have been giving a CCRC some thought. I am 64 so feel like I might be slightly to young yet?

What were the determining factors for the spot you ended up choosing for yourself?
 
NW-Bound said:
Braumeister, I am sorry for your loss.

Is your new place out of state from your old home? If so, how did you chose it?
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Yes, in a different state. It was initially recommended by friends who had moved there, also friends who had relatives living there. Never a negative word, everyone seems to love the place.

For anyone considering a CCRC, I think visiting your prospective choices in person and talking to residents is absolutely essential. You can do a lot of research online and by talking to them on the phone, but the personal touch is really important. I made a number of trips, and visited various places in several states after narrowing my selections down to a short list of about a half dozen.
 
Braumeister. Chiming in as another long term viewer of this forum and appreciative of your participation and commentary through the years. My condolences on the loss of your DW and kudos on the years of care you devoted to her. You gave her the ultimate gift. I had no idea.

You are inspiring me to do my own research. I am also the caregiver to my DH who has had Parkinsons for going on 20 years. The level of care I am now providing is beginning to reach an unsustainable level, with changes in how care is provided on the horizon. We do have LTC policies with substantial balances. I have not as yet done any legwork on researching what my life might look like, should my DH predecease me. I am mindful that I could easily be the first one to pass. My DH has outlived several of his closest friends, even with his progressive illness.

You are inspiring me to start the search process. We downsized from our family home to a 3BR 2.5 BA 2,650 SF single story condo 4 years ago. That move was a wise choice for us but would be too big for 1 person. Can you give me any details on how the finances of a CCRC work? My impression is that you " buy in" for a certain lump sum and then also pay a monthly fee and then progress through the various levels of care, as your needs change. Then the sum you bought in at is returned to you/your estate when you leave? Is this right?
 
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Golden Sunsets, there are several threads on this Forum about CCRCs (including how the finances work, all of them seem to be different). I live in a CCRC and did a long thread a couple of years ago about my CCRC. I am loving it here. Don't wait too long to get your name on the CCRC wait list --at my CCRC the wait list is very long and it takes at least 5 years to get an apartment.
 
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I can't imagine how difficult it is to be a caregiver.

I wish you well on your downsizing and selling of your condo and the move to the CCRC.

Enjoy your travels.
 
braumeister said:
I’ll spare you the details, but for the last four years I’ve been a full time, 24/7 caregiver as my wife struggled through an incurable cancer. She finally passed away earlier this year, and I suddenly find myself on my own again after 38 very happy years with her.

The caregiver role was the hardest job I’ve ever had, although I’m extremely grateful that I was able to do it for her. However, it took a great toll on me, both physically and especially mentally, and I’m just beginning to come back to life again.

The smartest thing I did was to get on several CCRC wait lists back when she was first diagnosed. I was able back then to travel around enough to check them all out in person, so I knew exactly what they were like. Our large condo is much too big for just me, and I wanted a fresh start. In a remarkable stroke of luck, my top choice of CCRC is expanding due to heavy demand, and I recently learned that a brand new unit (ranch style home) will be available for me this summer. I’m busily downsizing and getting ready for the move.

Looking forward (I think) to my new life as a single and being able to travel again. Already scheduled a major European trip for this autumn, so that’s a good start. Wish me luck!
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Oh, Broumeister, I'm so sorry to hear of your wife's passing. I admire you greatly for all the care you gave your wife these last four years. That is such love...
I wish you the best in finding your new life moving forward.
 
Golden sunsets said:
Braumeister. Chiming in as another long term viewer of this forum and appreciative of your participation and commentary through the years. My condolences on the loss of your DW and kudos on the years of care you devoted to her. You gave her the ultimate gift. I had no idea.

You are inspiring me to do my own research. I am also the caregiver to my DH who has had Parkinsons for going on 20 years. The level of care I am now providing is beginning to reach an unsustainable level, with changes in how care is provided on the horizon. We do have LTC policies with substantial balances. I have not as yet done any legwork on researching what my life might look like, should my DH predecease me. I am mindful that I could easily be the first one to pass. My DH has outlived several of his closest friends, even with his progressive illness.

You are inspiring me to start the search process. We downsized from our family home to a 3BR 2.5 BA 2,650 SF single story condo 4 years ago. That move was a wise choice for us but would be too big for 1 person. Can you give me any details on how the finances of a CCRC work? My impression is that you " buy in" for a certain lump sum and then also pay a monthly fee and then progress through the various levels of care, as your needs change. Then the sum you bought in at is returned to you/your estate when you leave? Is this right?
Click to expand...
A good friend of mine moved into one where you rent your apartment and there’s no buy in. He did that because he had Parkinson’s disease and knew that at some point he would have to move from independent living to assisted living and wanted to be able to stay in the same facility.

They did require him to change apartments because the assisted-living apartments are in a different wing than the independent living apartments. It was a good move for him because it allowed him to stay as independent as possible in his own apartment while getting the services that he needed.
 
Teacher Terry said:
A good friend of mine moved into one where you rent your apartment and there’s no buy in. He did that because he had Parkinson’s disease and knew that at some point he would have to move from independent living to assisted living and wanted to be able to stay in the same facility.

They did require him to change apartments because the assisted-living apartments are in a different wing than the independent living apartments. It was a good move for him because it allowed him to stay as independent as possible in his own apartment while getting the services that he needed.
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If I ever consider moving into one of these places, pay as you go model would be my choice too. I know that I can afford to pay full rack rate for many years and don't need Type A CCRC model to keep the monthly costs down, and not having a buy-in means I can also choose to move to another facility if I am dissatisfied with the current one. There is also less concern with the financial health of the CCRC.
 
Adding my deepest condolences on the loss of your wife.
Many blessings to you for your care, that is a difficult job.
Best wishes as you move forward.
 
My condolences on the loss of your wife. As you probably recall, I went thru the same caregiver job now 3.4 years ago. It took me two years to fully (almost) heal and find my new life.

My new life now includes a new love, and she has been great for me (she's widowed 2.5 years). We are connected pretty well and we may live out our days together.

Funny how life has many twists and turns as neither of us were feeling that a new love was possible this late in our lives. Boy were we surprised!

Best to you in the new place.
 
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So Sorry for your loss and the difficult journey you've been on. My DF was a caregiver for my DM. It took him a little over two years to come out of the strain and stress of it. Be patient and know that the sun will shine a little brighter as time passes.
 
braumeister said:
I’ll spare you the details, but for the last four years I’ve been a full time, 24/7 caregiver as my wife struggled through an incurable cancer. She finally passed away earlier this year, and I suddenly find myself on my own again after 38 very happy years with her.

The caregiver role was the hardest job I’ve ever had, although I’m extremely grateful that I was able to do it for her. However, it took a great toll on me, both physically and especially mentally, and I’m just beginning to come back to life again.

The smartest thing I did was to get on several CCRC wait lists back when she was first diagnosed. I was able back then to travel around enough to check them all out in person, so I knew exactly what they were like. Our large condo is much too big for just me, and I wanted a fresh start. In a remarkable stroke of luck, my top choice of CCRC is expanding due to heavy demand, and I recently learned that a brand new unit (ranch style home) will be available for me this summer. I’m busily downsizing and getting ready for the move.

Looking forward (I think) to my new life as a single and being able to travel again. Already scheduled a major European trip for this autumn, so that’s a good start. Wish me luck!
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My sympathies. I live in fly over country too.
 
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