Wanting vs Having

[Flyfish1]

Not sure if there are any boaters on this forum, I know there are some pilots and car enthusiasts, and this post may not be relatable to many but I feel like sharing.

We retired last year at age 59/60 and moved to Coastal CT which we absolutely love. For 11 years before we came here for sailing and then power boating driving 4-5 hours each way to do so, because we loved the area. For 25 years we primarily vacationed in Marthas Vineyard, The Cape and our favorite Nantucket. We have been boating to Block Island numerous times. The plan on retirement was to buy a bigger boat and a small fishing boat and do more and longer trips up the New England coast. But a funny thing happened once we moved by the water and moved into our new community. We and I in particular spent more time on the fishing boat ripping around and of course fishing and had less desire to do big trips in the big boat. DW agreed that the big boat trips with the two little dogs were not as exciting as we had thought it would be. We used to love coming up and doing boat trips , but once we are here it wasn't that thrilling. Plus the destinations we would typically go to we had been there dozens of times. DW said to me " we only have one shot at this retirement thing so let's make a decision". Of course she was right, by dropping the big boat we would free up much more money for travel and fun activities and not suffer from boating guilt - feeling like you have to use the boat just because you spend so much money on it. So there is a difference between wanting and having at least for us.

I know this may not be relatable to many on the forum but thank you anyways for letting me share. I feel like this community in general has been very friendly and understanding over the years - so thank you.

 

[Koolau]

Your choice sounds very rational to me. Retirement can change perspective on many issues.

Enjoy your retirement!

 

[pjigar]

I have a theory about wanting "big ticket items": You tend to intensely desire acquiring something you can't afford (or could afford but represents a bigger share of your income/networth). Desire to buy the same thing tend to sharply drop off once you have a lot of money that buying a big ticket item would not even make a dent in you "dough". I think it has something to do with knowing that you can buy it anytime you want so you don't sweat over it; you defer it for the "right" time or forego completely over time.

 

[pacergal]

Definitely a difference for us, not so much as buying something, but "doing".
We thought we would travel a ton in retirement. And we did in the beginning.
But then we realized we were more home bodies and liked a few shorter trips, and, of course, grand babies made an even bigger reason to stay home more
It wasn't until last year that DH mentioned to me he had thought of buying a boat in retirement--which is so out of character, plus we have never even gone on vacation where we could rent a boat in the past--lol.
I think the buying a boat or RV in retirement is one of those old "expectations" about retirement life. If you are really one who likes boating or RVing, you will most likely have one, or rent one frequently, before retirement now days.

 

[skipro33]

Since you love boating, just bored with the range you can currently venture, consider chartering a yacht and captain at destinations you wish to travel to. I'm not a charter captain but I know a few. (as a ski instructor, we have charter captains who are instructors as well during slow periods). They are well qualified to their waters and with your knowledge would be great company as well.
I sorta did the same with helicopters; charter or rent one while traveling on vacation. If a yacht is anything like a helicopter rental, be sure to know if the rate quoted is a wet or dry weight. If you are unaware of this, it could come as a nasty surprise when the visa card machine gets handed to you. For example, an Astar will burn around $300 an hour in fuel.

 

[aja8888]

All my retired friends over 70 have gotten rid of big RV's, boats, classic cars, 2nd homes, etc and are happy to have had all that but really like a simpler life going forward. Some still travel a bit, but big world wide trips are over and they are happy to spend time with family and friends.

Actually, that's what it is all about, anyway.....family and good friends.

 

[audreyh1]

Wants (or at least prioities) change when you retire. I imagine even more so if you move to a desired location.

We sailed a great deal in a local lake for several years before we retired. Really enjoyed our boat - sure helped maintain sanity. We expected to do a lot more sailing. Well once we retired we started traveling a great deal, the stress was way down. It ended up we had less time for sailing and the sailboat was more of a maintenance hassle as we didn’t use it nearly as much. So it was good to sell it.

I also thought we’d do a lot of chartering in the Caribbean and had studied all about it. We’d even gotten our first level sailing certification in anticipation of this. But it never happened. It simply dropped down the list of priorities.

 

[Midpack]

We had a series of 5 sailboats for over 25 years up to 35', and used them almost every Sat and Sun from May thru October on Tampa Bay/Lake Erie/Lake Michigan. We raced thru YCs, so it cost far more than most non-race sailors. also did quite a bit of ocean cruising/racing in New England and San Diego on OPB. Although we absolutely loved it, when I reflected on how much we were spending each year - for 25 years - I was astonished. I could have retired at least 5 years earlier without those expenses. After owning, we joined a sailing club that had daysailers on a large lake, but after sailing big waters for many years - we lost interest in lake sailing. So we now we're boatless with no regrets - that has been a total surprise as sailing was the center of my life for so long.

 

[Flyfish1]

Since you love boating, just bored with the range you can currently venture, consider chartering a yacht and captain at destinations you wish to travel to. I'm not a charter captain but I know a few. (as a ski instructor, we have charter captains who are instructors as well during slow periods). They are well qualified to their waters and with your knowledge would be great company as well.
I sorta did the same with helicopters; charter or rent one while traveling on vacation. If a yacht is anything like a helicopter rental, be sure to know if the rate quoted is a wet or dry weight. If you are unaware of this, it could come as a nasty surprise when the visa card machine gets handed to you. For example, an Astar will burn around $300 an hour in fuel.

Yeah that's a thought would definitely consider that especially in the Pacific Northwest which is on our travel list. Yep, I'm painfully aware of diesel burn rates, ours burns 30 - 35 gal/hr at cruise. Hence one of the reasons we are selling ..lol
We are still going to keep a fishing boat 26-30 ft range, so we won't be boatless.

This is our third biggish boat over the last 11 years - I try not to do the math on how much more money would have in our pocket if we never did that. But we had great experiences and scary experiences - all part of it!


I agree , once grandkids arrive then we certainly will be staying in the area more and more. Still waiting for that phase. It's all good , just funny how things change.

 

[LateToFIRE]

Recent FIRE-ee, bought a motorboat to celebrate, more or less a big, comfortable speedboat. My frustration has been the number of times I've gotten to use it this summer - between being gone for travel half the summer, winding down business activity, and a dearth of nice calm, sunny, dry weather days. Not my first boat, but its been many years since the last one.

This one has been a bit more effort to maintain than I was anticipating and I'm not getting any younger. Plus, I thought I would be swamped with friends and family clamoring for a boat invite, but actually, nope. Crickets. No one seems much interested, even other retirees. Hmmm. Everyone's too busy busy busy. I kinda get it - my retired schedule is way more packed with travel, projects, special events, community stuff, etc. than I could have imagined and showing no sign of slowing down. I'm pissed I didn't get any days to just hang out by the pool with a good book this summer. I thought retirement was gonna be relaxing You guys didn't tell me about this side of it.

Anyhow, regarding the boat thing, I can't imagine having two boats to care for. For sure, I would sell the big one if you're not cruising it extensively. Charter when you want that big boat experience - that's what I've done. FWIW, I have already been tempted to trade up to a bigger boat, something with a cabin and functional head, but DW smacked me in the head for even considering the six digit price-tag. She's right as usual - how dumb of me. That thing about wanting what you don't think you can have is a very real thing. For this reason I avoided all the boat shows this year. I have a very nice boat I've barely used - no need to develop a new case of boat envy.

 

[Koolau]

Yeah that's a thought would definitely consider that especially in the Pacific Northwest which is on our travel list. Yep, I'm painfully aware of diesel burn rates, ours burns 30 - 35 gal/hr at cruise. Hence one of the reasons we are selling ..lol
We are still going to keep a fishing boat 26-30 ft range, so we won't be boatless.

This is our third biggish boat over the last 11 years - I try not to do the math on how much more money would have in our pocket if we never did that. But we had great experiences and scary experiences - all part of it!


I agree , once grandkids arrive then we certainly will be staying in the area more and more. Still waiting for that phase. It's all good , just funny how things change.

30 - 35 gal/hr - that must be a big boat!

How far does that much fuel take you in miles? I know that fuel "mileage" in boats is sort of a misnomer, but can't help but think of it in those terms.

I recall doing "fuel mileage" calculation in my aircraft. I'd get about 15 mpg on average. It wasn't that bad in comparison to cars of that time period. BUT that would be terrible today - especially since AvGas is ridiculously expensive. Back in the day, AvGas was 45 cents when pump gas was 35 cents. Today, AvGas is $5 to $6.

The big thing with the plane was actually "going" someplace. We had friends who lived 200 miles away. That was a 2+ hour trip in the plane but 5 hours by car. So we could kid ourselves that owning a plane made sense. It didn't - but it was fun while it lasted. I'm sure it's the same with a boat. Unless you make a living with it, you have to justify it as "fun" that happens to cost a fair amount of money. Not a thing wrong with that IMHO.

 

[SJhawkins]

Being from the land of 10,000 lakes, one thing I noticed is about 5 years after folks have a lake place you are lucky see a dock in water anymore.

We had RVs in the past when the kids were young no regrets, took many years off without one. This year we picked up a little RV with the hope to hit the road for a few years knowing full well will tire of it in 5 years.

To circle back on boat deal, my fishing boat has not seen water in many years, we just rent a pontoon for a week and call it a year!

We have thought about a lake place, more for something to do and work on as we like to tinker on stuff, who knows maybe will put a boat in the water.

 

[Flyfish1]

30 - 35 gal/hr - that must be a big boat!

How far does that much fuel take you in miles? I know that fuel "mileage" in boats is sort of a misnomer, but can't help but think of it in those terms.

I think the calculated range at cruise speed, 26 knots, is something like 175 nautical miles, back down the throttle and of course it's better. It's fun , but for a few days a year it is crazy.

 

[Ronstar]

I sold our pontoon boat about 5 years ago and don't miss it. I have 2 kayaks to satisfy my need to get out on the water. Also sold our snowbird condo and my corvette.

Having less stuff frees us up to do more things.

 

[rembrandt]

B O A T = Break Out Another Thousand!

 

[rk911]

All my retired friends over 70 have gotten rid of big RV's, boats, classic cars, 2nd homes, etc and are happy to have had all that but really like a simpler life going forward. Some still travel a bit, but big world wide trips are over and they are happy to spend time with family and friends.

Actually, that's what it is all about, anyway.....family and good friends.

We're in that group. We bought our first motor home in 1986 when we were 35 & 34. We thoroughly enjoyed it and two other motor homes for 35-seasons selling the last one earlier this year. Why? My wife was no longer able to help me and it was just to much for me alone. We miss it and the travel but are at peace with the decision.

 

[Kings over Queens]

- feeling like you have to use the boat just because you spend so much money on it. So there is a difference between wanting and having at least for us.

Be careful for what you wish you, you just might get it.

Very relatable. I owned a boat for a while and what I learned from that experience is that I enjoyed the thought of owning a boat much more than the actual ownership of said boat.

I'm learning that there are very few things that I really "want" anymore, especially now that I'm in the position where "having" them is fairly easy or obtainable. Weird, huh?

 

[frayne]

The older you get, the more you realize that big material possessions end up owning you and become more hassle than they're worth.

 

[Koolau]

The older you get, the more you realize that big material possessions end up owning you and become more hassle than they're worth.

Well said. Stuff I used to covet means little to me now. Fortunately, I never bought most of it and sort of grew out of it.

 

[brett]

Best thing we did when retiring early was to downsize our life and focus on experiences vs things.

 

[Flyfish1]

Best thing we did when retiring early was to downsize our life and focus on experiences vs things.

Yep - I agree, just took me a year into retirement to realize it. I must admit I still have big boat envy, probably will for years, but those big checks that cut into my travel and fun budget make me think otherwise.

@Kings over Queens : My wife said the exact same thing when we were talking this over. " I like the idea of owning a big boat, but..." And yeah it is weird.

 

[twirler]

Not sure if there are any boaters on this forum, I know there are some pilots and car enthusiasts, and this post may not be relatable to many but I feel like sharing.

We retired last year at age 59/60 and moved to Coastal CT which we absolutely love. For 11 years before we came here for sailing and then power boating driving 4-5 hours each way to do so, because we loved the area. For 25 years we primarily vacationed in Marthas Vineyard, The Cape and our favorite Nantucket. We have been boating to Block Island numerous times. The plan on retirement was to buy a bigger boat and a small fishing boat and do more and longer trips up the New England coast. But a funny thing happened once we moved by the water and moved into our new community. We and I in particular spent more time on the fishing boat ripping around and of course fishing and had less desire to do big trips in the big boat. DW agreed that the big boat trips with the two little dogs were not as exciting as we had thought it would be. We used to love coming up and doing boat trips , but once we are here it wasn't that thrilling. Plus the destinations we would typically go to we had been there dozens of times. DW said to me " we only have one shot at this retirement thing so let's make a decision". Of course she was right, by dropping the big boat we would free up much more money for travel and fun activities and not suffer from boating guilt - feeling like you have to use the boat just because you spend so much money on it. So there is a difference between wanting and having at least for us.

I know this may not be relatable to many on the forum but thank you anyways for letting me share. I feel like this community in general has been very friendly and understanding over the years - so thank you.

Howdy, I did something similar. I saved money for yours with grand plans of what I’d do in retirement. Now, all I like to do is read, write, drink coffee, garden, and take naps. Keep living your best life.

 

[Flyfish1]

Thanks @twirler , glad I'm not the only one. Sitting drinking coffee and enjoying my morning. Enjoy your day.

 

[B-Guy]

B O A T = Break Out Another Thousand!

Bwahahaha!

 

[SnowballCamper]

I'm almost finished building my sailboat (about four years). I decided on a trailerable design so that the adventure feeling lasts longer than coming and going from the same slip every time. A boat hobby isn't the cheapest, but you've got to do something with your money.

A boat is just a hole in the water that you throw money into.