Youngest is a college freshman, remarkable attitude shift

[chemEguy]

Our second child is now a college freshman, both kids attend Big Ten universities but not the same ones.

Our daughter is a college junior and highly self motivated, always has been. She’s sitting on a 3.9 GPA and plans to attend law school. Not once did we ever have to ask her about schoolwork back in high school.

Our son was a different story. We had to stay on him to ensure he was getting work done, prepping for exams, and it was a fight to get him to prepare for both the PSAT and SAT. He managed to squeak into his Big Ten of choice and I think he knew how close he cut it.

He’s now in spring semester of freshman year and the turnaround has been astounding. He has a 3.88 through summer and fall semesters and has become highly focused on academics. He’s also eyeing law school and has flipped the switch from procrastination of work in high school to embracing hours and hours of study time to stay in front of lectures. He has also set some specific career aspirations and has found motivation to work the incremental steps to get there.

I don’t know what has led to such a profound change, but I think the environment has been a big part of it. His HS friends were good kids but not high achieving. He always had the ability but not the motivation. I suspect being surrounded by people in college that are constantly studying, but still able to be social, has radically changed his outlook.

High school version of this kid would NOT recognize college freshman version. Bragging about high GPA and long hours studying? Not a chance.

It is something to watch.

 

[COcheesehead]

I was a B/C student in high school. Really ambivalent, but when I got into college and could actually take classes that interested me, I made the Dean’s List every semester and graduated with honors.

 

[Mr_Pink]

Sounds like me. Graduated HS in NJ as a B student but then went to a big 10 school because at that time (70's) most big 10 schools had no application fee, so nothing to lose.

 

[pb4uski]

Well, to begin with, boys are different.

Your son sounds a lot like me but with one difference. I coasted through high school with a solid B average while hardly trying but as a result had very few choices with respect to college.

The first semester of college was my first time away from home unsupervised and I went crazy and had a lot of fun with little focus on classes. I had a solid 2.0 for that first semester. When DM wrote out the check for the second semester she said that it was the last if my grades didn't improve. They did, to ~3.0 territory... enough to keep the funding flowing.

That summer between my freshman and sophmore years was a recession, but I was lucky to find a job working in a local tire shop doing a little of everything, from selling on the sales floor, receiving, changing tires, oil changes, etc. At times I was working in the shop and it was hot as heck and we were all sweating. A couple of guys that I worked with were a couple years older than me and were making perhaps 25c an hour more than what I was making, which wasn't a lot.

I had an epiffany that if I didn't buckle up and make the most of my opportunity for a good education that that was my future so I buckled up and was consistently Dean's List from that point onward.

However, when you screw up your first semester of 8 semesters with a 2.0, it is very hard to bring your overall cumulative average up with only 7 additional semesters. I ended up graduating 0.025 short of what I needed to graduate with Honors which was my internal goal.

I'm glad to hear that your DS saw the light earlier than I did.

 

[floss187]

I was an A/B+ student in high school. i barely tried.
I was a C- student in college. i worked my butt off and still couldn't hack it.

city public school -> good private college was a reality check for me against my peers who came from money. I went from being the 'rich' white kid cuz my parents had a car to the poor kid in school who's dad's gave them 3-series bmw's for graduation gifts.

Where you're from and what you learn are big differences going into a school of choice. It sounds like your son found his way and a crew to grow up in more ways than academically.

 

[Golden Mean]

I was a B/C student in high school. Really ambivalent, but when I got into college and could actually take classes that interested me, I made the Dean’s List every semester and graduated with honors.

Yeap. This was me. When I finally went to college at 22 (payed my own way), and could learn more about electronics and computers (B.S.E.E.), I aced pretty much all of my technical courses. Except differential equations...

 

[planuntilthefisthits]

OP, you know your son better than me, but I was pretty unmotivated though HS. However, I got into my Flagship State U after my older sisters graduated. After returning from the bookstore with about 20 books that were assigned, I vowed to not be the first in my family to flunk out of college. Perhaps I was neurotic, but the anxiety of having all those books on my desk got me motivated--all the way to three graduate degrees and an incredible career.

May your son thrive and prosper!

 

[MarieIG]

Congratulations, it's wonderful to see your children do well.

 

[Koolau]

I'm glad it's going well for your son. Here's hoping he sticks with it and does well in his college c@reer!

 

[Steelpony]

Our second child is now a college freshman, both kids attend Big Ten universities but not the same ones.

Our daughter is a college junior and highly self motivated, always has been. She’s sitting on a 3.9 GPA and plans to attend law school. Not once did we ever have to ask her about schoolwork back in high school.

Our son was a different story. We had to stay on him to ensure he was getting work done, prepping for exams, and it was a fight to get him to prepare for both the PSAT and SAT. He managed to squeak into his Big Ten of choice and I think he knew how close he cut it.

He’s now in spring semester of freshman year and the turnaround has been astounding. He has a 3.88 through summer and fall semesters and has become highly focused on academics. He’s also eyeing law school and has flipped the switch from procrastination of work in high school to embracing hours and hours of study time to stay in front of lectures. He has also set some specific career aspirations and has found motivation to work the incremental steps to get there.

I don’t know what has led to such a profound change, but I think the environment has been a big part of it. His HS friends were good kids but not high achieving. He always had the ability but not the motivation. I suspect being surrounded by people in college that are constantly studying, but still able to be social, has radically changed his outlook.

High school version of this kid would NOT recognize college freshman version. Bragging about high GPA and long hours studying? Not a chance.

It is something to watch.

As a guys guy I had my first serious girlfriend in 11th grade (long story and the switch flipped on.

I think it was because now was the time to have a new more mature direction. It became really important to impress her parents or else.

 

[threeonesix]

When you're not challenged mentally, school is extremely boring and you don't care to give much effort. Compared to most public high schools, college is very challenging and brings out the best in a lot of young adults. I coasted through high school with a 4.0 and literally never spent one minute outside of school studying. Made it through college with a 3.8 but had to work hard for that.

 

[livingalmostlarge]

I'm praying my younger does that too!

 

[Original Wally]

I made the Dean’s List every semester and graduated with honors.

I turned out fine, but in elementary school I was often on the principal's list....

 

[pb4uski]

I turned out fine, but in elementary school I was often on the principal's list....

Do you mean often in the principal's office?

Funny story, but the Assistant Principal was the displinarian in our high school. i wasn't in his office often, but a couple times. My sister ended up marrying his son. RIP Bill.

 

[HappilyRetired]

I was a B/C student in high school. Really ambivalent, but when I got into college and could actually take classes that interested me, I made the Dean’s List every semester and graduated with honors.

Me too Cheesehead ! High school was just fun and games. College was serious! Also perhaps maturity played a role
As well! Have a great Sunday!

 

[Lorenzo]

Sounds familiar, at least in part. As a kid, I was drawn to science and technology, but I could never get a handle on math, got poor grades, and almost failed pre-calculus in high school. I somehow managed to get into my choice of college, and on the very first day I recall the new feeling of being on a college campus, the hallowed halls dedicated to preparing one for their chosen career, and feeling like, "You know, this is my workplace, this is my full-time job, just as I will someday have a full-time job as an engineer. My job is to go to classes and put in the long hours studying when I'm not in classes." Somehow it worked. I got A's in my math courses from then on, and graduated with a BSEE (not that I stayed with that career my whole life, but that's another story).