Your Identity in retirement.

I guess we are the retired 'hikers' then. Our great joy on an ordinary day is to walk anywhere from four to eight miles, first from our home to the mile-away beach, then decide where to go from there. Plus we discuss what delight awaits for us mid way- a shared lunch at our favorite burger spot? - a shared iced coffee and muffin? - craft beers and a small bite, if its the weekend (we're 'dry' Mon-Thur) at the brewery a short walk from our home on the return?

As long as we get out of the house and move for a few hours, everything else in our day is effortless. It's exactly what Ernie Zelinski wrote in his book The Joy of Not Working: When you do that which is hard, life becomes very easy. And vice versa 😐.

Someone asked us just the other day what we did pre- retirement, and I was seriously annoyed as I'm at the 'Who cares?' point after 13 years of FIRE. He had just retired himself, so clearly still struggling to separate himself from his job. Reminded me I used to be him, but now was not.

Today I'm hiking 10 miles with a gal pal, followed by lunch. My best guess is that a shower, and then my sofa and a book, will take up the remainder of the day. I have meatballs I previously made and froze defrosting in the fridge for an easy supper of spaghetti and meatballs. Will try to remember to pause and go out to catch the sunset, as we're still enjoying them under clear Winter skies, a seasonal thing here.
 
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What I realized about myself is I like to build stuff and fix stuff. I was all into brewing, until I got my system built and fine-tuned. (SNIP)

So I've got to keep having ideas for building and fixing things. I keep telling myself "It's a waste of time...you should just contract it out...you can afford it", but then what would I be? A lump who watches old DS9 episodes? I've gotta be more than that!
You've just described me accurately to a "T". If I'm not creating something or fixing something, I'm just not happy. If I'm at a friends house and see something that needs fixing, I always volunteer to do it. They almost always protest and say they don't want to take advantage of our friendship or some other thing. My reply is "You didn't ask. I did. I don't have to do it, I get to do it. To me, fixing and repairing things is fun.
 
I'm 15 months into FIRE and still have to work on disassociating from my career, in journalism. In 2024 I became an income tax student and thought I would do something with that. But this year I'm fully embracing another identity that has long emerged for me, a bicycling enthusiast and advocate. I mean, I leaned into that plenty in 2024, too, but now I'm downplaying the tax stuff (just doing the little bit I've long done on the side) and bringing my journalism skills to my hobby by creating a bicycling blog. I tell ya, writing and presenting what I want, on my schedule, is more fun than doing on manic deadlines what a publisher wants.

Meanwhile, I monitor our finances and investments, and tend to our house, and help elders, and spend quality time with my wife, and other stuff like many of you have written.
 
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I'm just a guy. I'm Tom. I know who I am!

My career was a big part of my identity when working. By the time my company went out of business and laid me off, I had scratched that itch, and didn't feel the need to continue making a name for myself, or proving myself to anyone.

It all sounds quite existential and really, it kind of is. Being alive is great fun.
 
I'm 15 months into FIRE and still have to work on disassociating from my career, in journalism. In 2024 I became an income tax student and thought I would do something with that. But this year I'm fully embracing another identity that has long emerged for me, a bicycling enthusiast and advocate. I mean, I leaned into that plenty in 2024, too, but now I'm downplaying the tax stuff (just doing the little bit I've long done on the side) and bringing my journalism skills to my hobby by creating a bicycling blog. I tell ya, writing and presenting what I want, on my schedule, is more fun than doing on manic deadlines what a publisher wants.

Meanwhile, I monitor our finances and investments, and tend to our house, and help elders, and spend quality time with my wife, and other stuff like many of you have written.
Yes, it's amazing the opportunities that open up during retirement. You now have almost infinite choice, bounded only by your will and the use of your precious time.

Enjoy your freedom to choose.
 
You've just described me accurately to a "T". If I'm not creating something or fixing something, I'm just not happy. If I'm at a friends house and see something that needs fixing, I always volunteer to do it. They almost always protest and say they don't want to take advantage of our friendship or some other thing. My reply is "You didn't ask. I did. I don't have to do it, I get to do it. To me, fixing and repairing things is fun.
I rented an Airbnb for a month and on the first day I fixed a storm door that didn't shut all the way (wanted to let in light, but not flies), and a bunch of cabinet doors (they were janky and had those nice, adjustable hinges). For the entire stay, I enjoyed operating those doors, rather than swearing at them, heheh!
 
I rented an Airbnb for a month and on the first day I fixed a storm door that didn't shut all the way (wanted to let in light, but not flies), and a bunch of cabinet doors (they were janky and had those nice, adjustable hinges). For the entire stay, I enjoyed operating those doors, rather than swearing at them, heheh!

At a beachside bar in the Virgin Islands sipping cocktails. One by one, we go use the restroom, but the "girls" went before me. The arm for the flush valve had backed out, so I fixed it. After one of the girls went to the restroom for the second time, she looked at me coyly and said "Did you fix the toilet?" Guilty.

I was donating blood, and finished filling out the questionaire, whereupon I had to sit in the interview room until the nurse came back to review my answers. In the meantime, I noticed the escutcheon on the doorknob had become unscrewed. I screwed it back in, and tightened the setscrew with my pocketknife. Later the nurse came back in to review my answers, and then a little while later a maintenance man showed up and asked where the "bad doorknob" was. I sheepishly told him I had already fixed it, and he just smiled and patted me on the back on his way out.

At an AirBnB in Floriday, the automatic door closers on the fridge were toast. (They are little circular ramps, that lift up the door when you open it, so the weight of the door will close it with little effort.) I ordered the parts on Amazon, had a friend help me remove the door, replaced the ramps, we replaced the door, and like Sengsational I enjoyed the self-closing door for the rest of the short stay.
 
I find this discussion very helpful.
I'm glad to hear that... it was an attempt at being funny, but have loved reading the replies.
Yesterday the DW came home early to catch me playing maintenance man...
 
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