We're just basing our opinions on the way we were (and what we were looking for) when we were teenage boys.Dreamer said:Hey you guys-you are not helping me feel any better.
Not to worry-- I'm sure today's teenage boys are different...
We're just basing our opinions on the way we were (and what we were looking for) when we were teenage boys.Dreamer said:Hey you guys-you are not helping me feel any better.
...she is throwing a fit wanting her own car. So far, we are hanging tough...
TromboneAl said:Boyfriend
Our daughter's boyfriend is a really nice guy, but pretty much of a loser. He writes at a fourth grade level ("rilly well"). He said he wants to go into criminal psychology because he figures "a lot of criminals in jails will need psychologists." We don't get it, cause our daughter is super smart, #4 in the class, etc.
They've been going out a year, and she spends almost every day with him. Boy are we going to break out the champagne when they break up!
Laurence said:When my wife dumped with her loser boyfriend, her parents literally did break out the champaigne. She still can't really say why she dated him, as she was #11 in her class, went to top ten University, and he "was taking some jr. college courses". I dated a non ambitious girl in high school, but that um...was short term thinking....shutting up now.
Martha said:Your wife probably dated the loser for the same reasons you dated the loser.
Laurence said:When my wife dumped with her loser boyfriend, her parents literally did break out the champaigne. She still can't really say why she dated him, as she was #11 in her class, went to top ten University, and he "was taking some jr. college courses". I dated a non ambitious girl in high school, but that um...was short term thinking....shutting up now.
Martha said:Your wife probably dated the loser for the same reasons you dated the loser.
Well, Laurence, I had a great paragraph ready to post but you took the words right out of my mouth. And back then I wasn't thinking short-term... I was thinking big!TromboneAl said:We don't get it, cause our daughter is super smart, #4 in the class, etc.
I think it's also "distancing". When people have time to prepare for an impending separation, they mentally & emotionally start to back away from each other. Sometimes it's also a physical separation long before the actual departure. The feelings of abandonment & separation start early and last for a long time, so the departure is greeted with "Get it over with already!" And of course it's easy to pick fights or to otherwise misbehave because it justifies the anger you already feel about that person leaving you.TromboneAl said:The book I mentioned above says that things will be especially problematic in the last months before college. The idea is that the kid is torn between being independent and still being dependent. Also, I believe that there is evolutionary pressure towards friction between parents and adolescents, because there's adaptive value in getting them out of the cave and on their own.
In any case, that's true here. A few major blow ups last week.
Two months, 27 days to go!!
Lazarus said:If you could see my Daughters boyfriend you would wonder what the physical attraction could be. Also the boyfriend has, no education, no ambition, no money. But still thinks he is better.
...the kids call to vent or commiserate and we parents mistake it for problem-solving opinion-requesting time...
If you could see my Daughters boyfriend you would wonder what the physical attraction could be. Also the boyfriend has, no education, no ambition, no money. But still thinks he is better.
And you didn't change the locks?Lazarus said:It would be a lot easier to respect her judgement if she hadn't climbed out her window to run away with him when she was 17.
Lazarus said:It would be a lot easier to respect her judgement if she hadn't climbed out her window to run away with him when she was 17. No money. In a car she didn't own or pay the insurance or gas for. Did I mention the boy in question helped her. Lucky for him that I didn't hear him and mistake him for a prowler. Over the last several years he has had more jobs than I can count. No I can't say that I respect her judgement. I may have to tolerate her choice though. No doubt it will be harder on her than me.
Spanky said:There is always hope that some day they will turn out to be responsible and contributing to society.