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Moving Things Up On 'The List"
Old 04-27-2010, 09:06 AM   #1
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Moving Things Up On 'The List"

Anyone moving things up now on their to do list (bucket list) due to, well, getting older? DW & I and some friends & family are back from couple weeks of adventure travel in Bali. We got up@3AM to get to the top of a volcano at dawn, hiked rice fields, cycled through the Monkey Forrest, snorkeled and a lot more. ( Had Kopi Luwak/civit coffee for those who remember Morgan Freedman's request from The Bucket List.) But this is not a trip report, its a question about doing things now. This trip was at the edge of our energy (DW=62, I am 59) and some others of similar vintage felt that way. DW decided @59 to go sky diving.Last year at the LA travel show we moved up the schedule for rafting the Grand Canyon when we saw how much energy it takes. Later in life we may do the 'pasta tour of Italy' or pub tour of England but we are realizing that there are some things we need to do now if we are going to do them. This isn't all about travel, could be home improvement or some other activity, maybe Trombone Al needs to surf the Maverick break, but with a realization that its time to do some of the energetic things now, with slower paced things to follow.
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realized this...
Old 04-27-2010, 10:13 AM   #2
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realized this...

I realized this after accompanying my Mom on a cruise to Europe when she was 73... she had always looked forward to traveling, but always put it off because my Dad didn't want to go anywhere and she didn't want to go alone.
I 'volunteered' to go with her anywhere she wanted to go... hence the cruise.
We thought that it would be easy peasy... but the reality presented alot of walking, steps, cobblestone streets and uneven ground at ruins. She spent more time 'resting' in a coffee shop while others explored Florence, Venice and Istanbul... sitting with some locals under an awning at the beginning of the tour of Pompeii and going to bed early.
You are absolutely right about moving certain items up on the list...
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Old 04-27-2010, 10:33 AM   #3
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This is not as exotic or exciting as travel, but one thing I've been wanting to return to as an adult is horseback riding. I rode, trained, and showed horses as a teenager/young adult and loved it, but haven't ridden a horse for probably 25 years now.

I had been casually researching local riding stables but most of them seem more geared to teenage girls who want to prepare for serious competition (jumping fences, etc). That was great when I was that age, but at 50, it's not quite what I have in mind. A few weeks ago I found a local stable that seems to cater to more mature adults returning to riding - perfect for me. I told the instructor that what I miss most is the connection to the horse, and she said she hears that a lot.

I have a lesson scheduled for tomorrow and I can't wait.
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Old 04-27-2010, 11:38 AM   #4
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My Mom is 93 and she always loved to be on the go but now she is really limited . This has made me realize if there is something I want to do I need to do it now . Luckily I did a lot of white water rafting , snorkeling , scuba diving and tent camping when I was younger but there are still places I want to see and things I want to do so I'm slowly checking them off my list .
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Old 04-27-2010, 12:01 PM   #5
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We've never really kept a list, but we've been anticipating a lot of activities that are easier when we're empty nesters.

We'll do our share of travel but I'm not much interested in package tour itineraries. I'd rather go to some city with a travel book and then consider a return trip as a jumping-off point to the countryside. The rest of the world... eh... send me a DVD.

I'm training for my 2nd dan in taekwondo, and I can see the benefits of continuing to train for 3rd & 4th dan. By then I'll be pushing 60 and having to make sure I don't break any major bones with brick-breaking stunts. One martial art is enough-- I don't feel inspired to take up muay thai or jiujitsu or aikido or hapkido.

I've stared 20-foot waves in the face and decided that I've seen enough. The smaller waves already administer a beating that's more than adequate. Loss aversion is a very strong response compared to the thrill of riding something even bigger and faster than your last thrilling ride.

Some things are waiting for a better opportunity. I'd like to take a defensive-driving course, but those only exist on the Mainland. Maybe someday with our (by then an adult) kid when she has the time.

I find myself saving some things on the list for later when I'm no longer physically capable of intense bursts of sustained effort: stand-up paddle boarding, catching up on old movies, re-reading old book series.

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This is not as exotic or exciting as travel, but one thing I've been wanting to return to as an adult is horseback riding. I rode, trained, and showed horses as a teenager/young adult and loved it, but haven't ridden a horse for probably 25 years now.
I had been casually researching local riding stables but most of them seem more geared to teenage girls who want to prepare for serious competition (jumping fences, etc). That was great when I was that age, but at 50, it's not quite what I have in mind. A few weeks ago I found a local stable that seems to cater to more mature adults returning to riding - perfect for me. I told the instructor that what I miss most is the connection to the horse, and she said she hears that a lot.
I have a lesson scheduled for tomorrow and I can't wait.
Have you considered dressage? No jumping involved. Our kid did dressage for three years and I was impressed by the number of adults who have been doing it for decades. It definitely requires a connection to the horse.

I'll caution that I know of only one or two retired equestriennes (multimillionaires) and no ERs.
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Old 04-27-2010, 12:44 PM   #6
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Anyone moving things up now on their to do list (bucket list) due to, well, getting older? DW & I and some friends & family are back from couple weeks of adventure travel in Bali.
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This isn't all about travel, could be home improvement or some other activity
I have already climbed mountains, hiked beautiful trails, observed the oceans extensively by scuba and ship, surfed big waves, and explored the world from top to bottom to the extent desired. Unlike one of our former Presidents I have no desire to skydive, and I am beyond the age of wanting to be launched into outer space. When it comes to international travel I have been there, done that (whether I wanted to or not), for much more of my life than anyone would rationally desire, and Google Maps is enough to quench any tiny remaining thoughts of further overseas expeditions.

So what is left? Honestly I am already doing everything possible on my to do list - - enjoying my retirement with Frank is right up there at the top, and leading a normal and quiet life in a place I can call home (a luxury most people enjoy and do not even appreciate!) is another contender for the number one position. Exploring unsolved real life mysteries from the comfort of my armchair is something else that I enjoy doing and do, and this doesn't require physical prowess so much as internet capabilities and both inductive and deductive logic. I would like to move to a different house (either here or elsewhere), though I suppose that with help this could be done at any age. That isn't moving up on the to-do list because right now houses just aren't selling so Frank isn't selling, and I want to stay near Frank. There are several hobbies on my to do list, but none that I would feel bad about if they slipped by.
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Old 04-27-2010, 01:58 PM   #7
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I have never really understood the bucket list idea. Unless you are not liking the way you spend your days, why change things? If it happens that you can no longer do one thing or another, be flexible and there will always be other things to do.

What I have moved higher on my list is taking care of my health. There are some thngs that I really do not want to see go- my marbles, my mobility, my ability to speak and move about independently, my eyesight, my ability to have sex.

If I lose these I will be sorry not because I failed to use them fully, but because without them life would be harder.

Ha
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Old 04-27-2010, 03:58 PM   #8
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Have you considered dressage? No jumping involved. Our kid did dressage for three years and I was impressed by the number of adults who have been doing it for decades. It definitely requires a connection to the horse.

I'll caution that I know of only one or two retired equestriennes (multimillionaires) and no ERs.
Yes, dressage is a possibility. I did a little of it years ago, when it was just gaining popularity. It does seem much more suitable for a "mature" rider than taking those big fences as crazy young girls. And it is really quite impressive when you see a horse and rider well-schooled in dressage - I have seen some demonstrations that just blew me away.

There's no way I am considering actually owning a horse. I'd have to return to w*rk to even entertain the possibility of that expense. I'm hoping to take an occasional private lesson or sign up for some small group classes here and there. I just want to be around horses again. If I could find a nearby horse rescue farm, I might even volunteer. These are things I should hopefully be able to manage on my ER budget.
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Old 04-27-2010, 04:20 PM   #9
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I just want to be around horses again. If I could find a nearby horse rescue farm, I might even volunteer. These are things I should hopefully be able to manage on my ER budget.
My ex took a job as a stable girl. She eventually became as assistant trainer, working horses on the lunge, riding them to settle them before lessons, etc. In return, she got free lessons and horse time for herself and our son. Something like that might be available at a stable near you.

Ha
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Old 04-27-2010, 05:50 PM   #10
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Cheap place to rent a horse to ride in beautiful settings = Panama.
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Old 04-27-2010, 06:34 PM   #11
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I want to write a long, extremely complicated fantasy novel that I've been thinking about since I was 15. Back then, I had the spare time; but decided, correctly, that I lacked the necessary experience and understanding of life. I now have those in abundance.

Building and managing a career, household, and family take so much time and energy. Although I love to write more than almost any other activity, I've learned that writing an epic is not something I can "pick up," like a piece of needlework, on vacations and days off. It is not, in addition, something I will forever have the wits, mental flexibility, and energy to accomplish, and subsequently to market (there is not much point in writing something that no one else has the chance to read).

I have a fear that I may already be too old to realize this dream. Writing short stories (the solution people invariably suggest) never interested me.

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Old 04-27-2010, 06:42 PM   #12
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I want to write a long, extremely complicated fantasy novel that I've been thinking about since I was 15. Back then, I had the spare time; but decided, correctly, that I lacked the necessary experience and understanding of life. I now have those in abundance.

Building and managing a career, household, and family take so much time and energy. Although I love to write more than almost any other activity, I've learned that writing an epic is not something I can "pick up," like a piece of needlework, on vacations and days off. It is not, in addition, something I will forever have the wits, mental flexibility, and energy to accomplish, and subsequently to market (there is not much point in writing something that no one else has the chance to read).

I have a fear that I may already be too old to realize this dream. Writing short stories (the solution people invariably suggest) never interested me.

Amethyst
I think that is a wonderful dream and one you should not lose!

Why not just start? I'd start by making a framework in whatever detail appealed to me (from as general as "introduction... text.... end" to perhaps even as specific as chapter subjects with scribbled summaries, or a flow diagram). Then one could flesh out each chapter with more verbiage and detail. I have heard the beginning is the hardest, so maybe I'd write that first or maybe I'd save it for last, when I am "warmed up" so to speak.

Like you, I'd like to write a book someday. In my case it would just be for the personal satisfaction of having that experience (I wouldn't publish it). I don't have any idea of what it would be about at this point but one day, I will do it. The first word is the hardest, or so I hear.
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Old 04-27-2010, 11:40 PM   #13
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I want to write a long, extremely complicated fantasy novel that I've been thinking about since I was 15. Back then, I had the spare time; but decided, correctly, that I lacked the necessary experience and understanding of life. I now have those in abundance.

Building and managing a career, household, and family take so much time and energy. Although I love to write more than almost any other activity, I've learned that writing an epic is not something I can "pick up," like a piece of needlework, on vacations and days off. It is not, in addition, something I will forever have the wits, mental flexibility, and energy to accomplish, and subsequently to market (there is not much point in writing something that no one else has the chance to read).

I have a fear that I may already be too old to realize this dream. Writing short stories (the solution people invariably suggest) never interested me.

Amethyst
Don't give up, Amethyst. If it's an epic you want to write, you could maybe break it up into parts with outlines, and work on one of them, in pieces. I've started a book and have decided that even at my relatively advanced age I am too young to sit still and finish it yet, because I enjoy physical activity too much. But I have the notes and the outline and I will go back to it. As for marketing, that is changing all the time and is dicey at best right now even for published authors to get an agent, but print-on-demand is an option and who knows, it'll likely be straight to electronic soon so you can just hire a geek on spec to put it out there.
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Old 04-28-2010, 01:49 AM   #14
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I have a fear that I may already be too old to realize this dream.
You've heard about the best-selling author speaking at a writer's conference?
He asked his audience: "How many of you want to be writers?"
Every hand shot up.
He responded: "So why are you here? Why aren't you off somewhere else writing something?"

Erma Bombeck used to say that writers don't think about writing-- writers can't stop writing.

Maybe Scott Berkun can offer some inspiration:
How to write a book – the short honest truth Scott Berkun
#54 – Writing Hacks, Part 1: Starting Scott Berkun

Personally, I think the writing is the easy part-- especially when you confront editing, publishing, and marketing. But I doubt that any of them will get any easier if I wait until I'm older...
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Old 04-28-2010, 07:19 AM   #15
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My ex took a job as a stable girl. She eventually became as assistant trainer, working horses on the lunge, riding them to settle them before lessons, etc. In return, she got free lessons and horse time for herself and our son. Something like that might be available at a stable near you.

Ha
Excellent idea, thanks!
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Old 04-28-2010, 12:26 PM   #16
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Excellent idea, thanks!
Of course you have to shovel a lot of "stuff" in a job like that...
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Old 04-28-2010, 07:53 PM   #17
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Anyone moving things up now on their to do list (bucket list) due to, well, getting older?
Almost everything I do, think, and plan is based on my declining physical abilities. Though Im 46 now and in perfect health, as far as I know, Im not silly enough to believe I wont soon be, as Yeats put it, "a soul fastened to a dying animal."

Am I cheering you up yet?

If I didnt think that way, FIRE never would have been a priority for me.
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Old 04-28-2010, 08:17 PM   #18
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A

If I didnt think that way, FIRE never would have been a priority for me.
Good point. It was a night in the cardiac ward three years back that sealed RE for me. I had a great job but a quick check of the financial accounts and remembering that my Dad only made it to 70 and it was retire @58 for me. Told my wife, the time is now, if the market does well we go to Tahiti, if not Tijuana, but we have the basics covered by my pension and its time to do whatever we can do now.
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Old 04-28-2010, 09:16 PM   #19
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I want to write a long, extremely complicated fantasy novel that I've been thinking about since I was 15. Back then, I had the spare time; but decided, correctly, that I lacked the necessary experience and understanding of life. I now have those in abundance.

Amethyst
Maybe you can get started (with a not so long complex version) by this: National Novel Writing Month That helps some folks get going. Or at least learn by doing - which can be pretty important!

I never thought novel writing was something you had to be young to do. And these days, self-publishing is so easy! With all the electronic tools we have today, ANYONE can write a novel if they choose to.

So - there is nothing stopping you! And you can still do it if you are 80+, IMO as long as you could still read and were mentally alert.

Audrey
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Old 04-28-2010, 09:51 PM   #20
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I don't have a bucket list. There are many things I have not done, but what would be worth doing to me, I am not sure.

So, I might just stumble across something from time to time, which is fine as my means are not unlimited and most activities cost money. If not one thing, then another. I am not picky, but I also crave little.
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