The price you pay for your success-observations

[Amethyst]

Sure, they can just print more whenever they want!

Her response just floored us: "Don't you understand? The government has unlimited money!"

.

 

[W2R]

My observations at 48 years old Early Retired. I try to keep a low profile and not disclose anything but yet I am constantly reminded..

1. Contractors arrive and suddenly (because of the neighborhood's perceived wealth appearance) the price increases 20%.

2. I have heard this based on assumptions (not me divulging) "Retired? wow, you must have plenty of money"

3. Along with that.." What do you care about the cost? You have plenty of money"..(mostly contractors and tenants)

4. Long time "friends" have disappeared.

5. Relatives outside my DW and kids, all of a sudden have a crisis and a need but love to criticize and state "What do you care? We aren't as "lucky" as you"..(LOL "luck"-Yes the leprechaun of money knocked on my door and gave it all to me)

6. Relatives only talk not listen. They look for an opportunity to interject the crisis or need for money;sometimes trying to manipulate so I can bring it up for them!

7.No more donating...as a result: disappointment and getting burned. (I am not talking about charity as in volunteering).

I am open to any thoughts, suggestions, support or similar stories..as I adjust to retirement for me and my family; and learn lessons the hard way

That sounds miserable! And these do not sound like nice people to me. I have never had any of these things happen to me at all. I guess in my case, nobody that I encounter in real life has any way of knowing whether I am barely scraping by or doing nicely. I live in a median priced home in a middle class suburb of New Orleans. I don't drive a luxury car mostly because I don't especially want one. So how would they know?

In my case, I guess I have an advantage because I am 66 - - so, being retired is pretty much expected and doesn't mean that I am wealthy. Still, I wonder how any of these people know your financial status. If I met someone who was 48 and not working, my first thoughts would be, "OMG, that poor guy, he lost his job in the recession during what should be his peak earning years!"

Just as an aside, don't forget that inflation affects the labor costs for maintenance/improvements around the house, for everyone, not just you. Workmen have to buy food too.

 

[Amethyst]

Yeah, and all that city water from the water fountains. And I took a pad of graph paper home once to use for class

A.

Don't forget about all the pencils, pens and sticky notes you consumed.

 

[robnplunder]

Sure, they can just print more whenever they want!

They can and they have. I am waiting for my share to be fedex'd to my house. I am probably low on their priority list after government officials, contractors, foreign countries, ....

 

[JPatrick]

Then again, I did get to use the Government's toilet paper for 30+ years

Amethyst

It makes pretty decent sandpaper also...Yet another perk..

 

[travelover]

...... I decided to donate $100 to a local thrift shop that buys thanksgiving turkeys for needy families.
.........

If it makes you feel better, the turkey was deeeelicious.

 

[calmloki]

This is a very common perception. Try to explain what it would to to inflation, etc, and their eyes glaze over.

But it ties back to the OP. Like the govnmt, many people think retirees, especially early, have near unlimited resources. I think now I understand why so many scream "I'm on a fixed income!"

Gal used to have people cry "fixed income!" when they were getting car repair quotes. She used to bat her eyes and say "wow -how nice for you - I have to work, and my income is not fixed".

 

[MRG]

Watched so many people with #5,6 happining in their lives. Doesn't happen in our family, anymore, strict boundaries in the living generation. It amazes my what low depths some people resort to.

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[robnplunder]

5 & 6 reminds me of a scene (or scenes) from "Nebraska" movie. When a main character's relatives mistakenly assume that one of their own won a lottery ticket, they behave accordingly a la 5 & 6 above.

 

[razztazz]

My observations at 48 years old Early Retired. I try to keep a low profile and not disclose anything but yet I am constantly reminded..

1. Contractors arrive and suddenly (because of the neighborhood's perceived wealth appearance) the price increases 20%.

2. I have heard this based on assumptions (not me divulging) "Retired? wow, you must have plenty of money"

3. Along with that.." What do you care about the cost? You have plenty of money"..(mostly contractors and tenants)

4. Long time "friends" have disappeared.

5. Relatives outside my DW and kids, all of a sudden have a crisis and a need but love to criticize and state "What do you care? We aren't as "lucky" as you"..(LOL "luck"-Yes the leprechaun of money knocked on my door and gave it all to me)

6. Relatives only talk not listen. They look for an opportunity to interject the crisis or need for money;sometimes trying to manipulate so I can bring it up for them!

7.No more donating...as a result: disappointment and getting burned. (I am not talking about charity as in volunteering).

I am open to any thoughts, suggestions, support or similar stories..as I adjust to retirement for me and my family; and learn lessons the hard way

1), 2), are just common business principles. It's how the marketplace works.

3) Is ordinary business ethics. At least in this country.

4) Who needs 'em any $&%#ing way? They won't be there when you need them. The money will.

5) & 6) I have relatives like that. Not all of them though. The one's who are that way I remember hearing doing that kind of moaning when I was a little boy, so not much has changed.

7) Not sure what you mean by this one

 

[Del Q]

As a small business owner in a small town I can relate. I think it would be much easier if I wasn't in business in the town where I grew up and where my family is from. I've been extremely careful about wealth appearance, to the point of appearing like I'm almost struggling. People in a small town don't want to do business with someone who appears to be getting rich off of them (even though you earn every $$). I'll FIRE next year at 50, most of my friends are in their upper 50's and have no retirement planned at all, that concerns me. They all have a higher standard of living than I do (much) yet some seem a bit jealous when I share my plan with them. Family doesn't lean on me much, my one brother has already spent most of our parent's wealth, he's been "so unlucky" mostly due to his high spending, alcohol, drug use and lack of ambition. I've been the "lucky one" because I could hold a job. Volunteer activities have been a two edged sword. I've lost customers because I'm involved in certain civic organizations, church and our local Fire Dept. If people disagree with something one of them does they'll take it out on you personally. Working with the public in a small town for 30 years can take a lot out of you, that's been my focus on being able to FIRE all this time.

 

[Amethyst]

Grew up in a small town, and can understand. When I was in junior high, my Dad was a volunteer police officer who sometimes rode patrols with the Police Chief. After they arrested the father of one of my classmates for drunk driving, the kids in school were out to get ME.

Amethyst

As a small business owner in a small town I can relate..... If people disagree with something one of them does they'll take it out on you personally. Working with the public in a small town for 30 years can take a lot out of you, that's been my focus on being able to FIRE all this time.

 

[marko]

Marko's neighbor made me think of a woman we met on vacation last year. She was going on at great length about all the things government should do for people, and DW asked her how those new services would get paid for.

Her response just floored us: "Don't you understand? The government has unlimited money!"

This was from a woman who has a well-paid job at a college.

We must've met the same woman!
A friend of a friend (a college professor) was telling me about her experience with the 'free' health care in the UK.
I said: "well, it wasn't free...somebody paid for it". She said: "yes! the government!"

 

[DUFUS]

Wait a minute... You can get contractors to "ARRIVE"?
I rarely get anything but an answering machine when I call a contractor. And even then, rare is the return call. And it seems less than half that I actually talk to come out for an estimate.
I've often wondered if I've been blackballed. I've never outright told them I have an opinion of them somewhere in the range of used car salesmen and members of congress, but maybe they sense I'm thinking it.
My apologies to FIRE'd contractors out there, leave me a message and I'll get back to you to discuss.

 

[braumeister]

I rarely get anything but an answering machine when I call a contractor. And even then, rare is the return call. And it seems less than half that I actually talk to come out for an estimate.

I used to wonder about this. Then I talked to my neighbor who was a local banker specializing in small business loans.

His reaction was to smile and say "This is why most small businesses remain small."

 

[Walt34]

We haven't run into those issues too often but have some. One of my quasi-distant relatives grew up in a wealthy family and never adjusted to the reality that she did not have the income to support a luxury lifestyle. When she went BK a few years ago her daughter, my niece, asked us for a $5k "loan" for a bankruptcy attorney that given her history I knew we'd never see again. She was disappointed but sort of understood when I explained that when the dust settled her mother would still lose her house and I'd be out $5k and I didn't see the point in forestalling the inevitable.

Another SIL has had mental issues for decades and has been on welfare since shortly after high school. She thinks we're "cold and uncaring" since we won't keep her in the style to which she would like to become accustomed. My take is that she was sleeping in when we were scraping ice off the windshield at 5:30 AM to go to work. Frankly, I don't feel the least bit sorry for her mental issues or no. That's the one who in HS got mad at DW when DW spent $5 of her earned baby-sitting money on a new blouse and she couldn't have one too.

 

[daylatedollarshort]

We get many estimates for contractor work. Some will jack up the price based on our address and some will not, and of course some never show up or never send an actual bid after showing up. It is wild how big a difference there usually is in bids. Having the time to get many bids and go over them in detail has been a real money saver for us in our semi-ER.

Otherwise we just tell people we work at home, which we do part-time. No one knows if we work a total of 5 or 200 hours a week.

 

[travelover]

We get many estimates for contractor work. Some will jack up the price based on our address and some will not, and of course some never show up or never send an actual bid after showing up. It is wild how big a difference there usually is in bids. Having the time to get many bids and go over them in detail has been a real money saver for us in our semi-ER. ........

Similar experience here. I think many contractors just toss on an extra charge to see if they can get away with it.

 

[JoeWras]

I probably didn't help things. I just verified that our neighborhood will overpay. I just overpaid for some minor contract work on my roof.

I'm still w*rking and didn't have time to deal with multiple estimates for fairly minor work. Plus, damage was occurring. So, yeah, probably overpaid $150.

Oh well. He comes highly recommended and the work looks good.

When I FIRE, I look forward to being more deliberate about such matters.

 

[HFWR]

Wait a minute... You can get contractors to "ARRIVE"?
I rarely get anything but an answering machine when I call a contractor. And even then, rare is the return call. And it seems less than half that I actually talk to come out for an estimate.
I've often wondered if I've been blackballed. I've never outright told them I have an opinion of them somewhere in the range of used car salesmen and members of congress, but maybe they sense I'm thinking it.
My apologies to FIRE'd contractors out there, leave me a message and I'll get back to you to discuss.

Yep, no answers, no shows...

I had a "roofer" come by to look at the shingles and flashing around my chimney. He had to borrow my ladder... He didn't get the job.


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[daylatedollarshort]

Similar experience here. I think many contractors just toss on an extra charge to see if they can get away with it.

We had one guy give us a a very high bid on some dry rot repairs and then said to let him know if we got a lower bid and he would work with us on the price. Isn't that like saying I'd like to charge you as much as possible but not a penny less?

We went with a company that had honest prices upfront and tipped the workers several hundred dollars extra as they did such a nice job, even on all sorts of extras that weren't in the contract.

 

[JoeWras]

I had a "roofer" come by to look at the shingles and flashing around my chimney. He had to borrow my ladder... He didn't get the job.

Maybe I didn't overpay.

My guy had a ladder, tools, supplies, insurance, safety in mind and decent skills.

 

[Amethyst]

There are all sorts of ways to jack up the price once you are into the job, and if the job is ongoing, it's hard to just say "Stop, no, get out of here."

When that has happened, I tell the truth on Angie's List and never call those people again. They may have gotten quite a few extra bucks out of us, but they've killed the goose and won't get any more golden eggs. They may not care during boom times, but in 2008 the contractors were crying for business, and they will again one day.

 

[Readyforachange]

Number 5&6. Last year I helped my mom who reportedly had problems paying for necessities with her "fixed income". I recently found out that I was played for a fool.


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[harley]

Wait a minute! You mean we're supposed to notice and care what other people think? I've been doing it wrong, I guess.