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Old 08-07-2012, 07:03 AM   #21
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My wife is happy - so I am happy...
Isn't this what really matters?
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Old 08-07-2012, 07:32 AM   #22
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Just curious, when the d*head spoke up how did the conversation end? Did you back off and indicate you were not really interested or did the managers return to needing a two year commitment? In other words, will the managers think the other guy derailed the discussion or clarified it?
Actually when he made his comment I slipped up and said Huh on the phone then said that I think it may be better that I withdraw my offer. Possibly, I over reacted, but while the person that spoke up does not really remember me - I remember him from the past and really did not want to work with him. If I had known he was their choice I never would have gotten to the phone call in the first place. The trainee (so to speak) is also management in their area - just lower than the ones that were trying to bring me on board. His job is not at stake - it is a government position.

Management did jump in and tried to rectify (weakly) and I countered with I would try to help them find someone, but I was no longer interested. I have received two emails - an apology email from him and one from management requesting another phone call - I have not replied yet because I need to formulate a good response - do not want to burn a bridge that may burn me later...

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Isn't this what really matters?
Michael - that is what my wife said... She agreed with some of the other posts. While she understood that I wanted to replenish the pot - she also believed that my over analytical approach was deterring me from enjoying life...

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My first reaction, of course, was that the trainee is an idiot and doesn't understand how the job market works.

My second reaction was that it wasn't THAT bad of a question, not one that seems like it should prevent you from working with someone.

However, it was bad enough if you really didn't want the job very badly. It sounds like it didn't take much to convince you that the job wasn't for you. That's not a bad thing at all, it shows where your mind is, and it's just as well this came up before you accepted the job, because a week in you'd have probably seen it wasn't what you wanted.
No, it was not really a bad question, but I was thrown off by it with the timing since they were the ones that came to me - not vice versa. I think that I had in the back of my head somewhere that maybe I should find a way out before I even made the phone call - not sure but maybe...
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Old 08-07-2012, 07:40 AM   #23
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Michael - that is what my wife said... She agreed with some of the other posts. While she understood that I wanted to replenish the pot - she also believed that my over analytical approach was deterring me from enjoying life...
Is this your only opportunity to earn some extra income to replenish the pot?
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Old 08-07-2012, 07:51 AM   #24
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Is this your only opportunity to earn some extra income to replenish the pot?
Naw, I was already looking at some lower key opportunities in other fields when this came up.

This would have just done it at a higher pace (higher income ratio) than my other ideas will generate - they are more hobby/passive income. Another project could always come up at this level, but the more that a person turns down - the less the opportunities come up.

In the beginning, the person that spoke up will get blamed for my withdrawal, but as times goes on it will become my fault - just how human nature works...
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Old 08-07-2012, 08:06 AM   #25
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Naw, I was already looking at some lower key opportunities in other fields when this came up.

This would have just done it at a higher pace (higher income ratio) than my other ideas will generate - they are more hobby/passive income. Another project could always come up at this level, but the more that a person turns down - the less the opportunities come up.
Does lower pace equate to less stress? That might allow you to achieve your objective and gain your DW's support.
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Old 08-07-2012, 08:17 AM   #26
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In the beginning, the person that spoke up will get blamed for my withdrawal, but as times goes on it will become my fault - just how human nature works...
OTOH, the "trainee" doesn’t get it that his future value to the company would have been enhanced due to your working with him for a short period of time, without the risk of any competition for the position in the future.

Another "Richard Cranium"...
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Old 08-07-2012, 10:03 AM   #27
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Management did jump in and tried to rectify (weakly) and I countered with I would try to help them find someone, but I was no longer interested. I have received two emails - an apology email from him and one from management requesting another phone call - I have not replied yet because I need to formulate a good response - do not want to burn a bridge that may burn me later...
I would just tell them something like: you really are retired and only considered their position because you liked working with them in the past and wanted to be of help. Committing to more than 6 months was not something you were ready to do and the phone conference convinced you that maybe they need someone who really wants and needs to work, thus the withdrawal. Kind of like those interview questions about what is you major weakness - the answer is always some flaw that involves neglect of your personal life due to over commitment to the firm or some such BS.
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:27 PM   #28
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... but then the person I would be training (so to speak) had to open his mouth (*^*&)... He wanted to know why I was negotiating - did I not understand they were offering me a job and that the unemployment lines were long long long...
That ended the negotiations... There was no way I would work with him.
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I remember him from the past and really did not want to work with him. If I had known he was their choice I never would have gotten to the phone call in the first place.
Eh, maybe not so "charming" after all...

Maybe he has a few unspoken fears about his own job security.
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Old 08-07-2012, 07:39 PM   #29
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I replied to both emails - very passive wording, but politically took the position that I really would rather just stay retired.

The guy that spoke up called me within minutes of me sending his email. He apologized (he wanted to in person) and let me know why he spoke up - now I kind of feel sorry for him (still do not like him though). He accidentally spoke what he was thinking and before he realized it he had said it aloud...

Like I said earlier, I knew him from before, but he had left the office and had just accepted a promotion to come back as the office manager over the area, but was told that they were bringing me in to help him get on track. In his mind he felt that he got a job that they considered him not qualified for (he isn't totally, but probably the best they have).

He was frustrated and under the gun - so he slipped. He asked me to reconsider, but I said I could not - I told him that I was now sure there was to much stress for me to handle - retirement has kind of spoiled me. I also think that maybe he is going to be the fall guy if he can not show progress...

I now feel sorry for him, but also know I would not last a month, much less 6 months in the current environment. I am sending him some notes to get him started - biggest areas of concern with the most bang for the buck.

I am going back to my original plan. Finish my renovations, get moved, take a vacation, get the for sale signs out and then start my hobby / entrepreneurial pocket money ideas. I can watch Matlock when I want, I can go fishing when I want or I can work at my own pace... This is a much better idea...

I do want to say thanks for all the replies. Helped a lot.
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Old 08-07-2012, 08:18 PM   #30
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I am going back to my original plan. Finish my renovations, get moved, take a vacation, get the for sale signs out and then start my hobby / entrepreneurial pocket money ideas. I can watch Matlock when I want, I can go fishing when I want or I can work at my own pace... This is a much better idea...
Once again a member of E-R.org comes to their senses, resists temptation and lives on to enjoy retirement.....
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Old 08-07-2012, 11:24 PM   #31
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Turned out well, I'd say. Congratulations.

Your willingness to negotiate something reasonable was commendable. The outspoken trainee displayed very poor judgment in the conversation.
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