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90 days in - its been an emotional roller coaster but I feel pretty good.
Old 10-02-2013, 01:44 PM   #1
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90 days in - its been an emotional roller coaster but I feel pretty good.

Hi hi-

90 days in here on ER.

- Im so paranoid about spending that it looks like I will only spend 2% of my 3.5% budget if I keep spending so little each month.

- First month my cat got very ill and almost died. Thankfully he recovered.

- Just last week I had a pretty bad sports injury and was laid up on prednisone and pain killers which made me extremely moody.

I feel great about whats happening with the portfolio so far and have no issues with the finance end of things. No anxiety there.

What I am feeling moreso is an increasing level of paranoia about screwing something up. I am spending low, hibernating, etc.

I suspect this anxiety will pass in time.

Im about to leave to go on an extended roadtrip to states and cities I have never visited before I relocate early next year after the thaw. This type of road trip is really low cost for me and I hope the fresh air, rural scenery helps me to normalize and relax.

I am guessing it is normal to feel some paranoia and anxiety 90 days in. What was your first 90 days like?
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Old 10-02-2013, 01:49 PM   #2
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I am guessing it is normal to feel some paranoia and anxiety 90 days in. What was your first 90 days like?
Sorry, but my first 90 days were marked by sustained euphoria over having finally escaped the need to work for a living. I never experienced the anxiety you describe.

However, I can relate in part to being very conservative with our spending in year one. Takes a while to get a feel for the numbers and get comfortable taking out instead of adding to your portfolio.
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Old 10-02-2013, 02:03 PM   #3
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I too started out very frugally for the first few months. Since ER I have been doing a monthly expense reconciliation with my budget and as the months passed I realized that my personal spending was lower than anticipated. This allowed me to enjoy spending more freely over the next few months. I think that part of this early financial anxiety is due to a tendency to over analyze combined with the knowledge that portfolio returns in the early years of ER are key to long term success. I think this will get easier over time as we learn to trust our LBYM instincts.

I think your road trip vacation will be an excellent distraction from obsessing with finances.
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Old 10-02-2013, 02:23 PM   #4
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Sorry, but my first 90 days were marked by sustained euphoria over having finally escaped the need to work for a living. I never experienced the anxiety you describe.
Yes indeed, that's what I remember!

Quote:
- Im so paranoid about spending that it looks like I will only spend 2% of my 3.5% budget if I keep spending so little each month.
This doesn't sound like a problem to me.
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Old 10-02-2013, 05:41 PM   #5
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It's normal for many to feel some trepidation about any major life change- inc retirement. Your pet's illness & your injury are 2 other big stresses. And as your doc may have warned you, those meds can REALLY mess with your head sometimes.
I say- Relax & enjoy your trip!!!
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Old 10-02-2013, 10:54 PM   #6
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Yeah I dont take any other meds or do drugs - the prednisone for the tendon injury made me feel like I was a menopause or something (laugh)
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Old 10-03-2013, 07:34 AM   #7
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Sorry, but my first 90 days were marked by sustained euphoria over having finally escaped the need to work for a living. I never experienced the anxiety you describe.
I think that aspect of it is different for me because before I retired I had been without employment or W2 income since 2011. I was owner of my own company and an an external consultant at most over the last few years so it didn't feel so much like the job slavery many escape from.

I guess I felt that kind of personal freedom before I ER but it was more like a temp release that I would need to return to if I ran out of savings cash.

Then I was able to get liquidity on 20% of my private equity portfolio which made indefinite ER possible.

So I rolled into it a bit differently.

I do appreciate this freedom you type of! And have for a few years now.
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Old 10-06-2013, 11:46 AM   #8
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I'm a bit paranoid about how it will be for me come my December retirement. I will have a decent pension and a small savings and health care paid by work but I recently had both dogs extremely ill, over $5k in expenses so far. It's those kinds of things that freak me and I decided that if I ever feel like I'm sinking I'll get a temp job. I really don't want to work full time or part time but a short stint would be fine. Plus I know I will have to live less high on the hog than I have been.
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Old 10-06-2013, 12:50 PM   #9
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Shasta, there's nothing wrong with spending 2% if that is what you feel comfortable spending! You can always work on spending more next year if you want to, and as you become more accustomed to retirement.

The important thing (IMO), is to have a wonderful, enjoyable retirement so do what feels right to you as you pursue that goal.

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I am guessing it is normal to feel some paranoia and anxiety 90 days in. What was your first 90 days like?
My first 90 days were full of elation and bliss, once I got my bearings. I spent what I felt like spending, which was a lower percentage than some may decide to spend. The world has not ended as a result of my underspending.

And this year, I will be spending more than any previous year of retirement because some of those irregular expenses (that we all have now and then) hit me this year, one after the other. Dental implant, new glasses, and this week my laptop computer fried so I had to buy a new one plus I will have some unknown amount of medical expenses due to my fall last Monday. If it's not one thing it's another, this year. My spending will still be reasonable (though more than prior years), because this is what makes me feel happy and secure. I sleep SO well at night.
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Old 10-06-2013, 02:35 PM   #10
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Hi hi-

90 days in here on ER.

- Im so paranoid about spending that it looks like I will only spend 2% of my 3.5% budget if I keep spending so little each month.

- First month my cat got very ill and almost died. Thankfully he recovered.

- Just last week I had a pretty bad sports injury and was laid up on prednisone and pain killers which made me extremely moody.

I feel great about whats happening with the portfolio so far and have no issues with the finance end of things. No anxiety there.

What I am feeling moreso is an increasing level of paranoia about screwing something up. I am spending low, hibernating, etc.

I suspect this anxiety will pass in time.

Im about to leave to go on an extended roadtrip to states and cities I have never visited before I relocate early next year after the thaw. This type of road trip is really low cost for me and I hope the fresh air, rural scenery helps me to normalize and relax.

I am guessing it is normal to feel some paranoia and anxiety 90 days in. What was your first 90 days like?
I had the euphoria but I also had some of the paranoia. Every time I would use a paper towel or a tissue or something else I would throw away or use up (deodorant, toothpaste), I would think to myself, "I have to buy more of that...again and again and again!" I had thought a lot about big on-going expenses such as rent, insurance, food, etc. but I started to notice EVERY little thing I was going to have to replace over time. It didn't last very long but it was a strange feeling!
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Old 10-06-2013, 03:47 PM   #11
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Change is hard. What you are feeling is pretty normal.
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Old 10-06-2013, 07:04 PM   #12
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Sorry, but my first 90 days were marked by sustained euphoria over having finally escaped the need to work for a living. I never experienced the anxiety you describe.

However, I can relate in part to being very conservative with our spending in year one. Takes a while to get a feel for the numbers and get comfortable taking out instead of adding to your portfolio.
+1

And I just realized that I have been Megacorp-free for six months as of yesterday....
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Old 10-06-2013, 08:44 PM   #13
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Shasta,

While I could hardly wait until retirement, I cried, felt sad after turning in my key, and had a few rough moments. When I posted my concerns over this on ER, somebody pointed out that we are not one-dimensional beings...that there are bound to be a mixture of emotions. It is more complex than simple.

Those reminders helped.
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Old 10-11-2013, 10:26 AM   #14
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I have been euphoric, sometimes over the top. A couple days from the 90 day mark.
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Old 10-11-2013, 06:17 PM   #15
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9 months since last day at work.

I HAVE been reborn!!!!!!

And I LOVE IT!!!!!!
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Old 10-11-2013, 06:47 PM   #16
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Change is hard. What you are feeling is pretty normal.
+1. I'm two years in, and we've been underspending substantially (about 35-45%), but we don't feel deprived at all. There is no right answer RE: early spending I suspect, and it seems the varying responses so far would agree. It's a marathon, not a sprint.

The OP says he/she "I feel great about whats happening with the portfolio so far and have no issues with the finance end of things. No anxiety there." That's understandable with markets up for the most part. The real test will come with the next inevitable big correction IMO. Another reason we've been conservative regarding spending...so far.
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Old 10-12-2013, 08:59 AM   #17
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Four and a half months in now and doing great overall. Spending is a lot higher than I would like right now but it is part of the plan. Totally remodeling our condo as it was in the rental pool for almost seven years so there was a lot of wear and tear: mattresses, furniture, appliances, window treatments, paint, the whole nine yards. Once this is all done expenditures should fall in line and anxiety levels will decrease.

Other than that I love it! Walking, bike riding, diving, snorkeling, swimming, reading by the pool, Spanish lessons, football Sundays at the sports bar, dinners out with friends. How did I ever find time to work?!?!
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Old 10-12-2013, 04:29 PM   #18
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I went through a bit of an identity crisis for 30 days, then spent two months in Alaska in our truck camper. That cured me rather quickly...
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Old 10-13-2013, 01:13 AM   #19
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I'm at just about 80 days now, no paranoia as yet. Sure I think about what I spend a bit more, but I'm not obsessing about it. I'm starting this adventure with just enough to live as I have, my only real concern is health care. I've got company subsidized health till 65, but it's not something one can count on too heavily these days.

In general, I'm finding I enjoy the slower pace, it's nice not having to finish everything at home on the weekends. The "there's always tomorrow" feeling, or is it a mindset, is starting to sink in, and I like it.

80 days in and I've stopped, at least for the moment, feeling guilty about staying home while DW goes to work.

My personal todo list is till full so there is not lack of things to keep me occupied. Friday I finally got in a day trout fishing, not a bad way to spend a sunny fall day in New England. And yes, this was on the todo list.
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Old 10-13-2013, 03:09 AM   #20
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9 days in for me. At first I was wondering what I would do all day. Now I'm wondering how I'm going to do all the things I'd planned to do in case I ran out of things to do. Each day gets better and better!
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