Seems like I've read my story before, many times. But I never thought it would happen in my family.
My sister has POA for my 91yo mother's estate. My deceased Dad always managed the family finances. Mom never learned anything about it, or even cared to think about money. She was pleased when my sister offered to step in and take over financial matters after Dad died.
After my sister took over, things went well for a while. But for the past 5 years or so she has kept all financial information about the estate to herself. She simply won't talk about it. The estate was valued at over $2M but I don't know what it's worth today. Every year I ask for an update but she says I'm too concerned about money and changes the subject. She's offended and shocked that I don't trust her.
My question is this, does having POA mean that other stakeholders have no legal access to information regarding the estate? My Mother can still communicate but she's sort of in a different world. My sister has written her off as being incompetent and so she won't even try to participate in any conversation on the subject. She wouldn't act on any request my Mom might make anyway.
So what can I do, just wait until estate settlement day to see how things went?
Something else that bothers me is my sister's concern for her children. She thinks I have all the money I'll ever need and that her children need it worse. She convinced Mom years ago to give each grand child the maximum tax free gift allowed each year (about $14k each). I'm starting to worry that my sister might "reasonably" take the next step and convince Mom to change her will to direct more to her children. This could happen and I won't know it until the estate settles, the way things are going.
We used to have a fairly close knit family but this issue is taking its toll. I've heard it's not so unusual but I never thought it would happen to us.
Anyway, I've read sound advice/insight from folks on this forum before so I thought I'd give it a try.
What do you think I can/should I do? Thanks for hanging on this far.
My sister has POA for my 91yo mother's estate. My deceased Dad always managed the family finances. Mom never learned anything about it, or even cared to think about money. She was pleased when my sister offered to step in and take over financial matters after Dad died.
After my sister took over, things went well for a while. But for the past 5 years or so she has kept all financial information about the estate to herself. She simply won't talk about it. The estate was valued at over $2M but I don't know what it's worth today. Every year I ask for an update but she says I'm too concerned about money and changes the subject. She's offended and shocked that I don't trust her.
My question is this, does having POA mean that other stakeholders have no legal access to information regarding the estate? My Mother can still communicate but she's sort of in a different world. My sister has written her off as being incompetent and so she won't even try to participate in any conversation on the subject. She wouldn't act on any request my Mom might make anyway.
So what can I do, just wait until estate settlement day to see how things went?
Something else that bothers me is my sister's concern for her children. She thinks I have all the money I'll ever need and that her children need it worse. She convinced Mom years ago to give each grand child the maximum tax free gift allowed each year (about $14k each). I'm starting to worry that my sister might "reasonably" take the next step and convince Mom to change her will to direct more to her children. This could happen and I won't know it until the estate settles, the way things are going.
We used to have a fairly close knit family but this issue is taking its toll. I've heard it's not so unusual but I never thought it would happen to us.
Anyway, I've read sound advice/insight from folks on this forum before so I thought I'd give it a try.
What do you think I can/should I do? Thanks for hanging on this far.