mathjak107
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
- Joined
- Jul 27, 2005
- Messages
- 6,208
Having gotten married for the 2nd time last year both my wife and i have grown children from our first marriages. Both of us had gotten screwed when our parents remarried and after their spouses inheirited everything they eventually re-wrote their wills leaving us out. Pretty ironic it happened to both of us.
So we gave lots of thought and didnt want to use restrictive trusts or to upset the living style of the surviving spouse by pulling the rug out from under each other and giving huge chunks or all to our respective kids.
We discussed it with our attorney and basically every thing legal binding was something we didnt want to do. so heres what we did and id love to hear how others resolved it.
We decided if we get married we will fully support each other thru life,meaning we will not give our shares away to our kids while one of us is alive leaving the remaining spouse to struggle thru an established lifestyle .
We than attached a note that was notarized that we each intend to be ethical and forth right and promise never to dis-inheirt each others children to our wills. We also gave a sealed copy of it to each child. Is it legal and binding? nope! Its strictley a moral thing as a will is a will and over rides all. But non the less we did vow to each other to do the right thing which is more than our parents did. We know each other well and both of us believe even if the other re-married if one of us passed away we would always do the right thing for each others kids.
We did agree that my kids will own my current life insurance policy and hers will get her share of any un-sold real estate in an inheirited business my wife and her son are partners in from my wifes deceased husband so they will get that at the death of either onE of us upfront before the remaining spouse passes away..
So we gave lots of thought and didnt want to use restrictive trusts or to upset the living style of the surviving spouse by pulling the rug out from under each other and giving huge chunks or all to our respective kids.
We discussed it with our attorney and basically every thing legal binding was something we didnt want to do. so heres what we did and id love to hear how others resolved it.
We decided if we get married we will fully support each other thru life,meaning we will not give our shares away to our kids while one of us is alive leaving the remaining spouse to struggle thru an established lifestyle .
We than attached a note that was notarized that we each intend to be ethical and forth right and promise never to dis-inheirt each others children to our wills. We also gave a sealed copy of it to each child. Is it legal and binding? nope! Its strictley a moral thing as a will is a will and over rides all. But non the less we did vow to each other to do the right thing which is more than our parents did. We know each other well and both of us believe even if the other re-married if one of us passed away we would always do the right thing for each others kids.
We did agree that my kids will own my current life insurance policy and hers will get her share of any un-sold real estate in an inheirited business my wife and her son are partners in from my wifes deceased husband so they will get that at the death of either onE of us upfront before the remaining spouse passes away..