Decluttering

[Montclairbobbyb]

Loving Single Floor Living

If you look at "blue zones", where people live healthy long lives, one commonality seems to be they live on a hill, and walk to town and back. So when I see that people want "master down" I'm wondering if that's doing a disservice for yourself.

I've always lived in multi-story homes until I recently bought a single story ranch (with full unfinished basement and pull-down ladder access to a fully-floored attic). I gotta tell you, I'm in heaven. I am constantly working around the property, I use the basement stairs frequently to get to/from my workshop, and we do live on a hill, where we walk or cycle daily, so I'm really no longer missing that "upstairs".

Perhaps the BIGGEST BENEFIT and what I love most about the ranch is easy access to the gutters, roof and all windows via step ladder, and direct access to all electrical and plumbing via the basement or attic. Especially in my retirement (for financial and just plain lifestyle reasons), I choose to do most of the repair and maintenance work myself. I'll never go back.

Peace,
BB

 

[Paulz]

I had to look it up....maxsold.com

I look at auction sites and Maxsold is pretty popular where I am (outside of DC).

If you have higher quality "stuff", Everything but the house (ebth.com) seems to do a good business. Pre-Covid, the auction pickup was in the town that the auction was held at, where now it seems everything is shipped to their place in Ohio and its either picked up or shipped to you from there.

One site I use a lot is Rasmus (Rasmus.com). It's predominately for businesses that are going under/refurbishing but every one in a while they have home furnishings show up. I did a partial-declutter using them and it went fairly well. Only problem with Rasmus is that they seem to only be in the DC metro and San Diego area, so if not local you have to arrange or pay for your own shipping.

 

[MarkiePippo]

Widower with 2 college daughters. Got laid off at 55. Early retirement numbers were close so I did not worry much. Now the pension and inheritances have helped. But almost immediately after we had to get ready to sell my Dads house. He fell, recovered but the house was still to much. My sister and I spend 5-6 months basically full time cleaning out the house. Other two kids helped a few days but we did the rest. My father who was still alive at the time wanted to help but the real estate agent wanted to get the house on the market quickly so we had to clean without him He would have slowed us to a crawl he was sort of a hoarder. Ten or so trips to the dump. Dozens of trips to Goodwill. Charities picked up furniture, dishes, washer and dryer. Everything that did not go ended up in my garage. A year or so later we cleaned my Uncles house out and everything we did not throw away also ended up in my garage. So now I have their garbage on top of mine. Working on it but it is hard to get motivated.The pandemic has not helped. I also need to downsize. 3400 square feet full basement is too big for just me and the girls when they are home.

 

[Golden sunsets]

Getting rid of physical photo albums is one decluttering step we took. I bought a document feed scanner, and sold it when I'd thrown out 99%+ of our photos. But then we inherited a huge batch of photos
Earlier thread, pointing to earlier threads:

https://www.early-retirement.org/forums/f54/scanning-family-photos-aaaauugh-101271.html#post2340803

This is a task we should definitely do. I have done some, but need to do many more. One question to those who have. How do you label, sort or generally arrange these photos so that when you do want to find one it is easy to find it.

 

[Golden sunsets]

DH & I downsized 2.5 yrs ago--from 5BR 3K SF to 1800SF 3BR townhome. (no first floor master yet...we are mid to late 50s...that will be our warm weather move in a few years..)
it was SO SO SO cathartic to purge! We have 3 children, 2 live in other states & one lives on campus at college. We did put some of their "memories" in tubs & housed them in my parents basement (they still live in 3KSF home!) as we have very little storage. DID have a garage sale/sold things on Facebook Marketplace, gave a TON away. I'm not a collector at anytime, but really looked at things carefully--either needed to be useful, have good memories or something loved for beauty.
After 2.5 yrs I have determined I need to purge again--many things we moved we have not used & I am fine getting rid of it!
We expect to move out of state (WARM & DRY) in the next few years & hope to do it with as few items as possible...clothing, memories, little else.

I didn't bother to mention the children's stuff. Both adult children's bedrooms are filled with boxes of stuff that are temporarily sitting in their old rooms. One child and his DW have their condo on the market and needed to declutter for purposes of staging their condo. The condo has not sold so they have taken it off the market till spring, so I guess we are stuck for a few more months. DD has moved out of Brooklyn as she has been telecommuting since April, probably will be doing so until at least next June. She didn't want to continue to pay exorbitant rent in Brooklyn and live in an area where the pandemic is in your face so to speak. She stored her stuff in a storage unit, clothing and other personal items in her old bedroom here and is living in a friend's spare apartment over the garage.

So I guess we can't consider moving until next summer at the earliest.

 

[Love This Community]

Note sure if this was covered in one of the earlier comments (didn’t go through all replies) but there is a systemic way to get rid of waste / declutter that industrial businesses follow (proven Lean manufacturing methods).

Anything that you know is not needed or useful, gets disposed of immediately
Anything that is a maybe / not sure gets red tagged with “today’s” date and placed in a bin.

If the red tagged item is not touched or used in the next 6-months or 1 year it gets disposed. No further evaluation made at that time to again think whether this item is useful or a maybe.

Remember carrying inventory costs money for businesses, why should it be any different in personal lives?

 

[Retch The Grate]

Over the years I've purged my fiction library and my RPG/game collection twice. The fiction I'm all fine with, but both the small and the big purge of my RPG collection I do actually regret. On the upside, I know to think even harder about deciding something in that set is ready to move on, on the downside, I definitely need to include space in homes to maintain and display it. Ah well.

 

[RunningBum]

Note sure if this was covered in one of the earlier comments (didn’t go through all replies) but there is a systemic way to get rid of waste / declutter that industrial businesses follow (proven Lean manufacturing methods).

Anything that you know is not needed or useful, gets disposed of immediately
Anything that is a maybe / not sure gets red tagged with “today’s” date and placed in a bin.

If the red tagged item is not touched or used in the next 6-months or 1 year it gets disposed. No further evaluation made at that time to again think whether this item is useful or a maybe.

Remember carrying inventory costs money for businesses, why should it be any different in personal lives?

Cuz we are people, not businesses?

I haven't worn a suit in a couple of years. Should I dispose of it? I say no, because I may need it in the coming year, or in five years, for a funeral, or some other special event.

I didn't do any running races, so a lot of my running gear, especially colder weather running gear, wasn't touched this year. But I hope to get back to racing in the spring, so I'm not getting rid of any of my running stuff.

Plenty of examples like that.

 

[SpinDoctorTX]

Note sure if this was covered in one of the earlier comments (didn’t go through all replies) but there is a systemic way to get rid of waste / declutter that industrial businesses follow (proven Lean manufacturing methods).

Anything that you know is not needed or useful, gets disposed of immediately
Anything that is a maybe / not sure gets red tagged with “today’s” date and placed in a bin.

If the red tagged item is not touched or used in the next 6-months or 1 year it gets disposed. No further evaluation made at that time to again think whether this item is useful or a maybe.

Remember carrying inventory costs money for businesses, why should it be any different in personal lives?

So well stated! DH & I both had previous marriages, and the lessons learned were the same on both sides. We were both savers with spendthrift spouses. Things are meaningless, & we have as few of them as we can manage. Clutter is my nemesis, and nothing comes into the house unless another thing goes out. That rule alone saves countless things from coming in the first place.

 

[Amethyst]

Not to mention all the items bought for beauty, not usefulness. I know people probably don't mean it, but sometimes it sounds as if other people don't have any art in their homes, because it isn't useful. No souvenirs, decorative boxes, heirlooms that remind them of parents...these precious items are deemed "clutter."

Reminds me of a couple my parents knew, whose house was so insanely neat and tidy, it almost scared them to visit. Not one book. Books get dusty "and besides, you only read them once," said the lady of the house.

Cuz we are people, not businesses?

I haven't worn a suit in a couple of years. Should I dispose of it? I say no, because I may need it in the coming year, or in five years, for a funeral, or some other special event.

.

 

[bluelight]

DH and I married 7 years ago. We each owned our own homes before our marriage, I had a small colonial for 20 years, he had a cape for almost 40. Adding to that was his parent's house that they had lived in for over 50 years. My MIL was the neatest, cleanest hoarder I had ever met.

We started with my MIL's Cape, they had only lived on the main floor and the basement and attic were full. Luckily 2 of our kids had recently purchased homes and took much of the large furniture. A house sale and donations to the local Lupus reseller took care of most of it.

Then we tackled DH's house where we started with Craigslist and rented a dumpster to discard whatever we didn't want to keep, didn't sell or wasn't worth donating.

Four years ago we purchased a new house, a single story ranch, before putting my house up for sale. DH had a longer list of must haves than I did and it took almost a year to find our current home. Our current house is a single story ranch that will allow us to age in place. 2300 sq ft plus a full finished basement that the grandkids will use post covid. The main level of the house is larger with large rooms than each of our homes was.

It took almost 2 years to slowly declutter. A painstaking process. I feel like it's time to go through everything again, but DH pushes back.

 

[Souschef]

We were in a similar situation to bluelight. We married 12 years ago, and both had 1800 sq ft homes. We bought a 1400 sq ft home (no basement), but a 96 sq ft storage shed.
DW had lived in her home for 40 years and I lived in mine for 25. Other than my clothes and tools, I brought very little. DW had well made expensive furniture and appliances that she brought with her.
BUT she has 4 storage tubs out in the shed that have not been looked at since we moved in. This pales in comparison to the problems a lot of people here have. As long as we have the room for them, I do not say anything.

 

[Love This Community]

Cuz we are people, not businesses?

I haven't worn a suit in a couple of years. Should I dispose of it? I say no, because I may need it in the coming year, or in five years, for a funeral, or some other special event.

I didn't do any running races, so a lot of my running gear, especially colder weather running gear, wasn't touched this year. But I hope to get back to racing in the spring, so I'm not getting rid of any of my running stuff.

Plenty of examples like that.

Hey RunningBum...all the more power if one has the space and foresee a use for these items in next 1,5 or 10 years. Nothing wrong in it.
My suggestion is only applicable IF there is a motivation or need to declutter.

 

[Music Lover]

We're just finishing up a major purge.

- my GF moved in last December. Prior to that in May I started a major reno that required me to move 3/4 of my stuff to the basement and garage.

- the reno was delayed and she moved in during the drywall stage. She had a 1200 sq ft house and was moving into my 1000 sq ft house. Most of her stuff ended up in the basement and garage while the reno was completed.

- the reno was completed mid-winter and we spent rest of the winter combining the 2 homes into 1 and donating, selling, and tossing out excess. It was a serious inconvenience doing a major reno and having someone move in at the same time but one advantage was that once it was done we could pick and choose what to bring back to the rooms. However, I don't recommend it

- we were mostly done by spring, then her mother moved into assisted living. We had to empty a 2500 sq ft, 5 bedroom, 4 bath house that was full of stuff. That took most of summer and in the last week before the house was sold we hauled away 30 pickup trucks of stuff. 5 to donate places and friends/family and 25 to our place. Yes, 25 truck loads

We're almost done now. There are only about 12 - 15 boxes of stuff left to go through and 3 boxes of just pictures. At times it was daunting and we thought we'd never get through it.

 

[Starsky]

Getting rid of my parent's stuff when they passed really gave some perspective on how worthless our belongings are to anyone but ourselves. Apart from the obvious valuables and selected generational memories, most is totally personal and the rest is anachronistic or worn out. Even things with obvious value to someone may be hard to dispose of and not worth the effort - like an old upright piano. (I also noticed the vast number of multiple and redundant objects that I, too, seem to be accumulating late in life. )
Goodwill and other charities are godsends.

 

[TrvlBug]

DH's outlook on keeping stuff just in case we might need it someday changed dramatically after we had to empty his mother's house. Full basement. She was a pack rat. 'Nuff said.

 

[RunningBum]

I try to declutter a bit now and then, but in my death letter to my son I tell him he shouldn't feel compelled to keep anything that doesn't interest him. I made a couple suggestions like maybe check with my running club about any running gear I have, stuff like that.

If I don't die prematurely I'm pretty sure at some point I'll sell this house and I'll try to be brutal with what to toss then. Last year I did a major sweep of my financial papers, which included a shoe box of paid bills and receipts for every year, and full tax documentation. For anything 3 or 5 years and older, I saved almost nothing from the boxes, and only the 1040 and maybe W2 and year end brokerage account statements from the tax records.

 

[Ger0n1mo]

OP:

I can relate. We just moved 2 months ago after living in the same house for 27 years. We moved to a larger house, but less storage - especially for my stuff as I had a partial basement, shed and larger garage for my tools and toys. DW has done an outstanding job in organizing and moving in. I am still working for a few months, holding out for a severance package that will likely happen soon. So, I don't have as much time to work on decluttering and organizing yet. We also moved to a house with 2 bedrooms and bathrooms on the first level. My DMIL lives with us and stairs were becoming too much for her. So, I don't have any suggestions but share your pain.

 

[Golden sunsets]

OP:

I can relate. We just moved 2 months ago after living in the same house for 27 years. We moved to a larger house, but less storage - especially for my stuff as I had a partial basement, shed and larger garage for my tools and toys. DW has done an outstanding job in organizing and moving in. I am still working for a few months, holding out for a severance package that will likely happen soon. So, I don't have as much time to work on decluttering and organizing yet. We also moved to a house with 2 bedrooms and bathrooms on the first level. My DMIL lives with us and stairs were becoming too much for her. So, I don't have any suggestions but share your pain.

We had the experience in late 2017 of moving my mother out of her home of 65 years to an independent living facility. We chose her furniture momentos and art for the 1BR unit, moved some of her possessions to our basement and donated or threw out the rest.

Six months later she needed an assisted living level of care, so we moved more to our basement and the rest to her large studio AL unit.

Another six months passed and she needed to be moved to a small room in the Memory Care wing, so more boxes to the basement. She passed away 14 months later at age 95. A final load to our basement.

This exercise was a very sad dismantling of my mother's life, literally piece by piece. I'd like to avoid that for our children- not that I minded all of the shuffling. She was a wonderful mother who never complained about all of the moves.

So a portion of the decluttering purge, I started this post with related to decisions on my mothers possessions. I confess to a great deal of sadness as I made these decisions through all of these stages of my mother's decline.

 

[Amethyst]

So depressing. All our striving comes to naught - while we're still alive to watch it happening.

We had the experience in late 2017 of moving my mother out of her home of 65 years to an independent living facility. We chose her furniture momentos and art for the 1BR unit, moved some of her possessions to our basement and donated or threw out the rest.

Six months later she needed an assisted living level of care, so we moved more to our basement and the rest to her large studio AL unit.

Another six months passed and she needed to be moved to a small room in the Memory Care wing, so more boxes to the basement. She passed away 14 months later at age 95. A final load to our basement.

This exercise was a very sad dismantling of my mother's life, literally piece by piece. I'd like to avoid that for our children- not that I minded all of the shuffling. She was a wonderful mother who never complained about all of the moves.

So a portion of the decluttering purge, I started this post with related to decisions on my mothers possessions. I confess to a great deal of sadness as I made these decisions through all of these stages of my mother's decline.

 

[mountainsoft]

Not to mention all the items bought for beauty, not usefulness. I know people probably don't mean it, but sometimes it sounds as if other people don't have any art in their homes, because it isn't useful. No souvenirs, decorative boxes, heirlooms that remind them of parents...these precious items are deemed "clutter."

Reminds me of a couple my parents knew, whose house was so insanely neat and tidy, it almost scared them to visit. Not one book. Books get dusty "and besides, you only read them once," said the lady of the house.

We have a few souvenirs and one or two heirlooms, but not much. I would rather take a picture and keep the memory than having a bunch of stuff sitting around to remind me of someone who is gone. That's just me...

As for the books, I think it depends on the book. I have a small collection of "reference" type books for woodworking, plumbing, electrical, car work, etc. I go back to these books often when I'm working on a project. However, I don't see the point in keeping a novel or something that you only read once and will never look at again. That's why most books I read these days are on the Kindle, they don't take up any space.

 

[Chuckanut]

I have been going through my garage with a new found sense of brutality. Things I have stored for years on the theory that someday I might need them especially in an emergency are being tossed in the trash, or boxed and given to Goodwill. Except for tools. Getting rid of a working tool in good shape is guaranteed to cause something to break, fail or otherwise require repair or replacement, since that tool will be required to do the fix.

I do keep an emergency items cabinet, but no longer 5 duplicate items with 4 in poor condition.

 

[Amethyst]

What really convinced me to marry Mr. A., besides attraction, was visiting his home and seeing things I just didn't see in other single men's homes:

1) Art on the walls - not originals, we were govvies after all - but good framed prints. He had one tall wall that had framed prints and pictures up to the ceiling.
2) Records and videotapes, and a good stereo (it was the 1980's) -- eventually replaced with modern media.
3) Shelves full of good books.

To me, those are things that make a house a home.

He didn't have any heirlooms, and the first wife walked off years earlier with all their wedding gifts, so we also had the fun of picking out our own stuff.

We have a few souvenirs and one or two heirlooms, but not much. I would rather take a picture and keep the memory than having a bunch of stuff sitting around to remind me of someone who is gone. That's just me...

As for the books, I think it depends on the book. I have a small collection of "reference" type books for woodworking, plumbing, electrical, car work, etc. I go back to these books often when I'm working on a project. However, I don't see the point in keeping a novel or something that you only read once and will never look at again. That's why most books I read these days are on the Kindle, they don't take up any space.

 

[Golden sunsets]

I have been going through my garage with a new found sense of brutality. Things I have stored for years on the theory that someday I might need them especially in an emergency are being tossed in the trash, or boxed and given to Goodwill. Except for tools. Getting rid of a working tool in good shape is guaranteed to cause something to break, fail or otherwise require repair or replacement, since that tool will be required to do the fix.

I do keep an emergency items cabinet, but no longer 5 duplicate items with 4 in poor condition.

YES Chuckanut! A new found sense of brutality. You've captured the sentiment that one has to have when undertaking this kind of purge.

 

[Golden sunsets]

Confession. One of the areas that I didn't purge was original art. We have more art than wall space. My mother, Uncle and Aunt were all hobby artists, not famous but quite good. We have many of their pieces on our walls, along with other pieces we have collected, but their deaths in recent years resulted in a bounty for us. So our basement walls are now decorated with the overflow. I do expect that our children will claim some of this overflow or other pieces we have upstairs at some point.