Love the passion of the thread despite the fact I am knee deep in it. As mentioned earlier, this is unfortunately not my first rodeo in one of these family crisis involving financial assistance. It's real easy to say what should be done when you are not in it, but when real relationships are involved, it's never black& white. I am absolutely against enabling and know what I want the mission to be of any $$ I contribute to the kiddy. There is a human side to all of this that involves compassion for our fellow man. Again, right there with everyone on enabling, but I would suggest compassion is part of the equation. Sometimes we provide charity in good faith that someone will see the light and change their ways, sometimes they do and sometimes they don't. I think what most of us take for granted on this site is most of us are wired naturally to be financially responsible, but it's clear there is a whole large population out there that is not and it doesn't make them bad, regardless how frustrated we get with them. I think there is definitely a place for tough love, but then there is also a place for compassionate charity and faith that people may see the light. i am sure we can all think of times we were given a second chance or someone bailed us out and we got our $hit together.