Couples' expected retirement age has increased by a year, on average, since the 2007 survey, with husbands expecting to retire at age 64, up from 63 two years ago, and wives expecting to retire at age 63, up from 62.
And the follower has to trust the decision-making of the leader and accept it.If you are not on the same page, find a happy medium. It is perfectly OK for one partner to lead, but the "follower" has to be completely up to speed, and have it all written down.
My late husband and I kept our finances seperate . It had good parts and bad parts . The good part was it eliminated any stress about finances . The bad part is you miss a certain intimacy that comes from sharing your finances . Let's face it intimacy comes with trust and if you can trust someone with your money the relationship is stronger . He retired before I did since he was older and since he died I never got the answer to the question " Was my retirement my problem to finance " ? If the answer had been yes I would have been crushed since isn't that what commitment is helping each other with our goals ?
While this also works for me, I wouldn't go so far as claim it in a blanket statement. One of the interesting things about life is that we all have different wants. That can make it difficult to find someone compatible, but on the flip side, it makes it more special when you find that someone.My late husband and I kept our finances seperate . It had good parts and bad parts . The good part was it eliminated any stress about finances . The bad part is you miss a certain intimacy that comes from sharing your finances . Let's face it intimacy comes with trust and if you can trust someone with your money the relationship is stronger .
There are a lot of definitions of "fair." Retiring at the same time might not be "fair" if one of you worked many more years than the other (especially if no kidlets were in the picture).DW and I will pull the shoot on the exact same day. The Day she turns 55, we will jump into the ER pool together. We don't think it would be fair for one of us to be retired and the the other going to the grind.
If I had a dollar for every disagreement avoided because LH and I kept some "mad money" in a separate account for those "because I want to" things...I think that having separate finances is very important if you aren't married, for obvious reasons. My opinion is a bit cloudier on married couples, but I will say that we keep ours together, and that is what I counsel young couples to do.
90% kidding here, of course.
The good news is that there are many areas (health benefits, retirement beneficiary designations for "insurable interest" parties, Self +1 policies, trusts) where it is possible to take care of a SO or life partner in the absence of legal marriage.I absolutely agree that unmarried couples are smart to keep their finances separate but I do not agree that unmarried committed couples have no responsibility for the other partner . My So and I have our finances separate but we do not feel that if one person can not afford something that is strictly their problem . I have a problem with that concept but to each his own .
" ? If the answer had been yes I would have been crushed since isn't that what commitment is helping each other with our goals ?
I'm sorry if my post hit a nerve with some people it was not intended to be personal just a reflection on all relationships . Just like my thread on helping your children some people said "It is their problem " .What happened to families and close relationships where we all helped each other ? Somehow we've lost sight of that and as a society we've gotten selfish or maybe I'm a sap for feeling this way ?
No nerves hit here. I understood exactly what you were saying.I'm sorry if my post hit a nerve with some people it was not intended to be personal just a reflection on all relationships . Just like my thread on helping your children some people said "It is their problem " .What happened to families and close relationships where we all helped each other ? Somehow we've lost sight of that and as a society we've gotten selfish or maybe I'm a sap for feeling this way ?