Nursing - in the end, is humanity

[MichealKnight]

Yep good ol humanity. We are all great, good, sort of mean, and total jerks. It takes all shapes and sizes of us to make the world go round but sometimes - I guess frustrated.

Teenage DD was diagnosed with rather serious Scoliosis 1 year ago. Curve was too severe and only major surgery would (hopefully) do it. Very normal, well behaved, studious girl but after that - there has been some clinical anxiety/depression which naturally we dealt with professionally. We chose Shriner's Philly.

The surgeon is well known for this - - and the man is God's person. He walks on water, a Prince of a guy. Not only an expert and proven - with people all over the country/world visiting him - but humble and nice as pie. Ditto ALL the Doctors who worked with him. And this hospital is FREE in that they don't give 2 craps if you can pay or not, it never even came up. (Thankfully, ACA gold covered most of it) BUT POST-SURGERY....5 NIGHTS....

I know nurses work hard. Tiring. Long hours.Difficult patients. So I am trying like hell to take that into account in that they too - like me are human and entitled to be a bit grouchy or tired sometimes but basically from what I experienced:

30% nurses were wonderful. So damn compassionate, loving, warm, concerned.

40% - we adequate. As in going to the DMV to get a license. Not rude, not nice, did their job and off we go.

The other few -yeah - mean. And proud of it. Terse. Day after surgery nurse was removing DD's catheter and DD said in her groggy states "ouch...that hurts'.....the pediatric nurses reply with NO expression other than a sigh and eyecroll "I'm taking a tube out of your body so it's gonna have to hurt"

On nights were it was Dad's *mine* turn to spend night at hospital - when DD needed help with bathroom a nurse asked - "you want ME to help her?" and all I could do was calmly say "yeaaaah I'm sorry. my 15 year old teenage daughter isn;'t thrilled about me helping clean her private parts".

There were multiple incidents where I sort of felt the courtesy factor was better at the average Olive Garden.

I did all the pleases and thank-you's - that is normal for me since childhood. I'd bring all the nurses donuts and iced-teas-and any treats I could find but still.....a good chunk of them I felt belonged doing nursing at a prison facility or something like that.

Then in overnight intensive care....the nurses would be outside talking, conversing, laughing at 2am....look I'm fine with that, gotta get thru the night - and I'm glad they are social. BUT it would be so loud! Like a 9 year old girl's slumber party loud when they know that post-operation patients are trying to even get a little sleep.

I dunno. I'm not a nurse. Have never been. Again I appreciate all the hard, tough, even gross things they do for us.

But if you can't at least pretend to care or pretend to be nice, maaaaybe if wasn't the right job for you.

Main thing is that the surgeon and his team - were awesome and we're back home doing the recuperating and pain stuff now.

 

[aja8888]

DW was three weeks in the hospital and three weeks in skilled care before she passed. The nurses did the best they could and some were a bit grouchy. I would be grouchy too, after what they go thru on a daily basis.

Give them a break, it's a tough job and a lot of patients are not like your daughter. Some are a real PIA to the staff.

 

[MarieIG]

Like many professions, you can get great care/ attention, and less than great care/ attention.

I'm glad you found your DD such a good surgeon, and I wish her a speedy recovery.

 

[aaronc879]

It doesn't matter how hard your job is, don't punish the good people because you had to put up with some bad ones.

 

[Walt34]

I spent a lot of time in hospitals because of my job and generally found nurses, unsurprisingly, some of the nicest people on earth. But as in any occupational group there are always a few who one wonders whatever drew them to that job.

 

[Dash man]

I’ve always loved the nurses either I or my family have had with one stand out exception. When my son was born, after a day home we had to take him back to the hospital for jaundice. The nurses were great except for an Air Force Lieutenant who was concerned more about paperwork than patient care. On her shift she literally did nothing unless we asked for it. We were both exhausted, but if we hadn’t stayed with our son, we thought he’d be ignored. Fortunately, all other nurses I’ve dealt with have been kind and caring wonderful people.

 

[MuirWannabe]

My two daughters are nurses. So I love nurses. They are underpaid imo.
Having said that, I’ve run into bad ones when my mom was in rehab following a stroke. Or maybe they were just overworked.
But overall, God bless nurses!

 

[MC Rider]

My new "Primary Care Provider" which I met today is a FNP. Family Nurse Practitioner. I guess Doctors are in short supply. She was fine. Nothing like Nurse Ratched.

 

[ER Eddie]

I spent two months in the hospital, as a patient in ICU, then recovery and physical rehab. I have also worked with a lot of nurses professionally.

From my experience as a patient, I'd give the following estimates:

10% were absolutely stellar. I will always remember them; they were heroes to me. I'm tearing up just thinking about them.

50% were competent and genuinely caring. They took time to explain things, and their concern was evident.

35% were competent but mechanical in their approach. Their attitude seemed to be, "Let me get this done so I can check it off my to-do list." I don't blame them. I know they're busy, and I don't need everyone to ooze empathy. But they didn't seem like they cared. I can't say they did anything wrong or inappropriate, though.

5% were just crap. There was one nurse in particular who I wanted to punch in the nose, but I was too weak. She was blaming and accusatory at a time when my life was in jeopardy. My family agreed that she was awful.


Nursing is a tough profession, no doubt. I know from my professional interactions with them that mental health issues like depression and addiction are prevalent.

 

[friar1610]

I spent two months in the hospital. I have also worked with a lot of nurses professionally. From a patient's POV, I'd give the following estimates:

10% were absolutely stellar. I will always remember them; they were heroes to me. I'm tearing up just thinking about them.

50% were competent and genuinely caring. They took time to explain things, and their concern was evident.

35% were competent but mechanical in their approach -- entirely task-oriented, in other words. Their attitude seemed to be, "Let me get this done so I can check it off my to-do list." I don't blame them -- I know they're busy, and I don't need everyone to ooze empathy. But they didn't seem like they cared; they just wanted to get the task done.

5% were lousy. There was one nurse in particular, who was blaming and accusatory, at a point where my life was in serious jeopardy. I felt like punching her in the nose, to be honest. My family agreed that she was awful.


Nursing is a tough profession, no doubt, but some people just should not be in it. Given the nursing shortage, many hospitals will let things slide rather than discipline nurses. Mental health (e.g., depression) and addiction are serious issues in the nursing profession.

My daughter, an ER nurse in a big-city, nationally-known children’s hospital tells me that more and more of their adolescent patients arrive with mental health issues. And for those who require admission for those issues, it’s increasingly difficult/impossible to find longer-term beds anywhere in the state, let alone at her hospital or others in the city.

 

[Stormy Kromer]

I've spent the last 19 days with DM in three different hospitals. She had Leukemia break out of her bones and the pain has been worse than bad.

The nurses have all been absolute angels. Most (all but one) doctors have been great.

Lots of conflicting information makes it hard. The nurses are always focused and helpful.

I got DM to a new assisting living home facility today that includes hospice when the time comes when its needed. The people were fantastic. Nurses have gained a lot of ground in my respect, and I already respected the a lot.

Hospital administrator....insurance company claims executives.....could take lessons from the nurses I met.

 

[Koolau]

Yep good ol humanity. We are all great, good, sort of mean, and total jerks. It takes all shapes and sizes of us to make the world go round but sometimes - I guess frustrated.

Teenage DD was diagnosed with rather serious Scoliosis 1 year ago. Curve was too severe and only major surgery would (hopefully) do it. Very normal, well behaved, studious girl but after that - there has been some clinical anxiety/depression which naturally we dealt with professionally. We chose Shriner's Philly.

The surgeon is well known for this - - and the man is God's person. He walks on water, a Prince of a guy. Not only an expert and proven - with people all over the country/world visiting him - but humble and nice as pie. Ditto ALL the Doctors who worked with him. And this hospital is FREE in that they don't give 2 craps if you can pay or not, it never even came up. (Thankfully, ACA gold covered most of it) BUT POST-SURGERY....5 NIGHTS....

I know nurses work hard. Tiring. Long hours.Difficult patients. So I am trying like hell to take that into account in that they too - like me are human and entitled to be a bit grouchy or tired sometimes but basically from what I experienced:

30% nurses were wonderful. So damn compassionate, loving, warm, concerned.

40% - we adequate. As in going to the DMV to get a license. Not rude, not nice, did their job and off we go.

The other few -yeah - mean. And proud of it. Terse. Day after surgery nurse was removing DD's catheter and DD said in her groggy states "ouch...that hurts'.....the pediatric nurses reply with NO expression other than a sigh and eyecroll "I'm taking a tube out of your body so it's gonna have to hurt"

On nights were it was Dad's *mine* turn to spend night at hospital - when DD needed help with bathroom a nurse asked - "you want ME to help her?" and all I could do was calmly say "yeaaaah I'm sorry. my 15 year old teenage daughter isn;'t thrilled about me helping clean her private parts".

There were multiple incidents where I sort of felt the courtesy factor was better at the average Olive Garden.

I did all the pleases and thank-you's - that is normal for me since childhood. I'd bring all the nurses donuts and iced-teas-and any treats I could find but still.....a good chunk of them I felt belonged doing nursing at a prison facility or something like that.

Then in overnight intensive care....the nurses would be outside talking, conversing, laughing at 2am....look I'm fine with that, gotta get thru the night - and I'm glad they are social. BUT it would be so loud! Like a 9 year old girl's slumber party loud when they know that post-operation patients are trying to even get a little sleep.

I dunno. I'm not a nurse. Have never been. Again I appreciate all the hard, tough, even gross things they do for us.

But if you can't at least pretend to care or pretend to be nice, maaaaybe if wasn't the right job for you.

Main thing is that the surgeon and his team - were awesome and we're back home doing the recuperating and pain stuff now.

Waiting for my stents for 3 days (long story) I had the best nursing care I could imagine. They were nice to me, nice to DW, attentive, considerate, prompt.

After stents in different ward the one male nurse was "okay" I guess, but was constantly waking me up some how. From the "party" in the station outside my door to waking me up to weigh me, it was not a fun recovery. I was ready to go home. It all depends on the person.

 

[eytonxav]

I spent 10 days in the hospital back in 2015, about 4-5 in ICU, and have nothing but praise for the nurses who were all wonderful. No grouches at all. It might depend on specific hospitals with higher patient loads that can lead to encountering more grouchy ones.

 

[ER Eddie]

My daughter, an ER nurse in a big-city, nationally-known children’s hospital tells me that more and more of their adolescent patients arrive with mental health issues. And for those who require admission for those issues, it’s increasingly difficult/impossible to find longer-term beds anywhere in the state, let alone at her hospital or others in the city.

Just to clarify, when I referred to depression and addiction in the nursing profession, I meant among nurses themselves, not among their patients. For instance, I'd estimate that a third of nurses are on an antidepressant. Many have addiction issues.

You are certainly right, though, that dealing with mental health and addiction issues in patients is part of the stress that nurses face.

 

[aja8888]

Just to clarify, when I referred to depression and addiction in the nursing profession, I meant among nurses themselves, not among their patients. For instance, I'd estimate that a third of nurses are on an antidepressant. Many have addiction issues.

You are certainly right, though, that dealing with mental health and addiction issues in patients is part of the stress that nurses face.

About one half the people I know are on some kind of antidepressant med.

Even my SIL, who is the happiest person I know, and has no apparent reason not to be happy, said to me the reason she is on Xanax is because if she wasn't, she would certainly find a reason to have anxiety.

Two of my close, male, retired 70+ year old friends take an antidepressant because it makes them sleep better.

 

[Koolau]

About one half the people I know are on some kind of antidepressant med.

Even my SIL, who is the happiest person I know, and has no apparent reason not to be happy, said to me the reason she is on Xanax is because if she wasn't, she would certainly find a reason to have anxiety.

Two of my close, male, retired 70+ year old friends take an antidepressant because it makes them sleep better.

I would be concerned about anyone "routinely" taking Xanax. It's one of those that must be "withdrawn" carefully and under supervision if it's used daily for quite a while. I'm surprised a doctor would prescribe it for other than occasional use. I had a few pills from my doc to get me through my serious health issues a few years back. Just knowing I had them, helped. I used maybe 2 or 3 and eventually pitched the rest. YMMV

 

[ivinsfan]

Nurse are human beings and just like us have good days and bad days. And some burnout along the way. Patients and their families are the same. A lot of nurses see people on some of the worst days of their lives and not at their personal best.

 

[Stormy Kromer]

Hospice Nurses are the closest thing to an Angel on this side of Heaven.

On another note, I had a good friend getting treated for brain cancer at St Mary's Hospital in Rochester MN (Mayo clinic hospital) about 30 years ago. Thay saved his life. After his surgery a very experiened, long tenured nurse that reminded him of his grand mother came in with a bed pan and told him he had to relieve himself. He said "There's no way I can pee for you with you holding that bed pan". She replied sternly "If President Reagen an pee in one of these for me so can you". He did.

He got better and is doing well still today.

 

[Letj]

I’ve been an in patient in hospitals a few times and I have to say my experience was universally positive. I found the nurses, nursing assistants, techs to be universally kind and caring. I’d also like to think I was a good patient who treated them with respect. Some were obviously more competent than others. I think some of it depends on the local culture. I’ve heard some horror stories about nurses at big city hospitals.

 

[friar1610]

Just to clarify, when I referred to depression and addiction in the nursing profession, I meant among nurses themselves, not among their patients. For instance, I'd estimate that a third of nurses are on an antidepressant. Many have addiction issues.

You are certainly right, though, that dealing with mental health and addiction issues in patients is part of the stress that nurses face.

Got it. When I reread your post that’s how it came across.

 

[Harris4crna]

Nurse for 30 years. Truly interesting reading posts about us nurses. I concur with most.

 

[Koolau]

Nurse for 30 years. Truly interesting reading posts about us nurses. I concur with most.

I'm sure you are one of the angels of mercy that I have encountered. Blessings

 

[Harris4crna]

I'm sure you are one of the angels of mercy that I have encountered. Blessings

Haha, most people do not remember me. I work in anesthesia. Although, most are truly happy when they wake up in recovery and say, "am I done".

 

[Koolau]

Haha, most people do not remember me. I work in anesthesia. Although, most are truly happy when they wake up in recovery and say, "am I done".

I remember an anesthesia nurse. I was transitioning from a gurney to the operating table. My back was in pain (unrelated to my procedure.) So I was not concentrating on how my flimsy gown was protecting my dignity as I upside-down crab walked my way onto the table. I was more worried about not getting a muscle spasm. The nurse grabbed the hem of my gown and pulled it down. Not that it was a big deal, but I just appreciated the small act of kindness.

Heh, heh, though the procedure was on my neck, they may well have taken the gown off after I was under. I don't know or care. Just that she was thinking about her patient and putting herself in my place was what I celebrate. Thanks to all the caring nurses.

 

[MuirWannabe]

Haha, most people do not remember me. I work in anesthesia. Although, most are truly happy when they wake up in recovery and say, "am I done".

All I remember from anesthesia nurses is the request to count backwards from 10. I’m pretty sure I’ve never made it to 8. Does anyone ever actually make it to 1?