"The problem is that NY is much different than most other places... he bought a place for almost $1 mill... and I bet it is in the 1,000 to 1,200 sq ft range... not big at all... and in addition to the mortgage, you have to pay your condo fee which can be an additional $1,000 to $2,000 per month... groceries are much more expensive in NY... I can tell you that I probably shopped at the store he shops at now... and it is small with high prices..
Not to say they could not make some other choices and save some money, but the people I knew who did that had a 1 to 2 hour commute each way... so their family life suffered...
Maybe he should become a waiter... I had heard that they can make over $100K in the high end places... that is much better than the $25K he is getting now..."
I would disagree. I can buy groceries in NYC for less than in some suburban areas of the south, and living in the FD gave him easy access to fresh fish, meat, and produce in Chinatown - very high quality and inexpensive. He also bought an apartment with a mortgage that 1/3 his considerable gross income, but which was at least two or three times what a rental would cost, in a city where renting is not a crime. The problem was that he and his wife lived beyond what his salary could support. Steak, lobster, and $200 bottles of wine do not help one save for retirement or a rainy day. He laments having exhausted his emergency fund which, with a single income, should have been at least 12 months living expenses.
If we contrast him with examples from The Millionaire Next Door, we find that he wanted the appearance of being rich, while the real millionaires would rather have the reality. Rather than "doing everything right", he and his wife allowed lifestyle inflation to imperil their financial futures.