Donner,
Thanks for your posts -- they describe well a certain pre-ER stasis that, if left alone, might just keep you in the 'let me just work for 2 more years' loop. So it is worth digging into a bit.
I think what is missing is a vision of what you want to do with your life -- now or after ER.
Up to now, everything is about planning the financial part. Whether you choose to trust in it or not, or whether another 5% or 10% would always be welcome, it sounds as though you are probably close enough financially to ER today, or at least within a few years. That is no longer the issue, and you need to forget about the financial stuff for now.
What you need to do now is figure out what you might feel is missing from life. What do you feel passionate about? Do you have any new friends? New interests? Do you feel resentful of work a little because it is keeping you from starting on project x, y or z that you really are fired up about? Take these answers and work with them. If there aren't too many things you can say 'yes' to, then work on that . What did you love to do when you were 22? Did you always want to ride a motorcycle? Or backpack the Appalachian Trail? Maybe get a sailboat? Or was it something more along the lines of developing an art or craft to a degree you could feel pretty good about the quality of the work you were turning out, learn to play the bagpipes or make intricate models of ships in bottles. Maybe it is to get involved with youth groups and take kids to build Habitat for Humanity houses in a poor neighborhood in your state Who knows? But my strong sense is that until you get to the heart of what _you_ really care about, you'll be sitting on the other side of the fence, thinking about how it is scary or uncertain over here.
Once you know why you want to ER, why work is holding you back from your true destiny, then you'll put up with all sorts of uncertainty or even financial sacrifices to be able to have all your time free to really live the new life you are charting for yourself.
Problem is, it won't be all clear at first, and it may be impossible to be really clear on it until you stop, spend a year or two floundering around trying things and finding yourself led toward the thing that is really going to sustain you for the long run. So you might have to jump in first and then figure out why you did it later.
This isn't so bad once your realize that everybody has to retire sooner or later, and figure this all out. So whether you face up to this at 57 or 67 or 77, it is going to be the same challenge. Might as well get an early start on it!
Good luck with this -- for some, it is arguably the hardest part of the whole ER deal, completely different in warp and woof from learning to LBYM or learning to make and save lots of money.
WOOF -- I love it.
5 years into ER and I am still figuring out why I did it, but now I don't mind.