I'm 6'6" and my DW is 5'4" so we never danced a lot. If we slow danced it was kind of awkward because of this. When went out to a party or some other place where there was dancing we would mostly just watch. Some times she would talk me into a slow dance where I would just sway and move in some kind of a circle. But back in my younger days if I had enough to drink I would do a mean "Funky Chicken" I'll never forget once a long time ago being in NC mountains and my DMinL getting on a platform and doing a "Buck Dance" as she called it, looked similar to clogging!
What percentage of men do not enjoy dancing?
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W2R
Moderator Emeritus
Here's the song that keeps going through my head, as I read this thread.
audreyh1
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Let's not forget... there are also women who can't/shouldn't dance....
I bet it was really hard for her not to dance properly! She's a wonderful comedian. Was by far my favorite Seinfeld character. Oh yeah - and for FIRE forum - Julia Louis-Dreyfus net worth is estimated to be around $250. Her father was a multi-billionaire financier.
Great dance song - EWF
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Let's not forget... there are also women who can't/shouldn't dance....
But in this spirit of this thread, she was most definitely enjoying it.
pb4uski
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
I think you mean $250 million, not $250.
Nemo2
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yakers
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
A while back (2015) I posted about a blog (Dancing withMrC)I was keeping about dealing with stage 4 throat cancer; music and dance was a key part of my coping. If anyone is interested I think the link is still there on my profile URL or PM and I can send it. Just want to post here one of my postings entitles "Boys Don't Dance"
When I was about five I can remember dancing and swaying to music. That was the last time for many, many years that anyone thought my dancing was cute or attractive in any way. It was very simple, boys don’t dance. In grade school and high school I pretty much avoided dancing since I would look like a jerk, college too. Oh, it was nice to have a slow dance every now and then, loved the contact and no one, expect my poor partner, could tell my feet weren’t synchronized to anything.
I was 30 in 1980 when I arrived for a NASA position in Pasadena after a 3 year US Navy job in London and shortly decided I could do things I never had done. I learned to swim, did some rock climbing, jumped out of a perfectly good airplane. And, gulp, I figured out I wanted to dance. I took one swing step class at the community college but I wanted something beyond social dancing. So I went to a local dance school where Jamie took my money and put me in a level 1 jazz/modern dance class (they didn’t have anything lower or remedial). It was a real class and I felt like a lumbering giraffe among the fluid gazelles. I learned that after lots of practice my capacity to remember a routine increased and that lessened my embarrassment. In the all level classes there were people who danced for a living or dance was part of their fitness for the entertainment industry. They were on commercials, music videos and in performances. No one ever had an unkind word to say to me maybe because they sensed that I was ‘serious’ in my efforts and bliss would break out across my being occasionally.
I remember the first time, it was a routine to On Broadway by George Benson. Suddenly it wasn’t work, a memorized routine or watching others trying to synchronize. It flowed from outside and within My feet went where they were supposed to go, all by themselves. And I couldn’t stop.
I was still never much of a dancer, never performed. The only role once offered to me was to play a stationary tree. They were trying to include me but, no, thank you. After a year or so I stopped going to the class, still a desire to dance but didn’t feel that class was where I needed to be. And I had proved, to myself at least, that I could dance. And that was my dance experience for the next 25 years. I no longer felt socially or personally blocked from dancing just not many opportunities crossing my path.
But come relive that first time with me; kick ball change, cross step, cross step….http://tinyurl.com/p26umtn
When I was about five I can remember dancing and swaying to music. That was the last time for many, many years that anyone thought my dancing was cute or attractive in any way. It was very simple, boys don’t dance. In grade school and high school I pretty much avoided dancing since I would look like a jerk, college too. Oh, it was nice to have a slow dance every now and then, loved the contact and no one, expect my poor partner, could tell my feet weren’t synchronized to anything.
I was 30 in 1980 when I arrived for a NASA position in Pasadena after a 3 year US Navy job in London and shortly decided I could do things I never had done. I learned to swim, did some rock climbing, jumped out of a perfectly good airplane. And, gulp, I figured out I wanted to dance. I took one swing step class at the community college but I wanted something beyond social dancing. So I went to a local dance school where Jamie took my money and put me in a level 1 jazz/modern dance class (they didn’t have anything lower or remedial). It was a real class and I felt like a lumbering giraffe among the fluid gazelles. I learned that after lots of practice my capacity to remember a routine increased and that lessened my embarrassment. In the all level classes there were people who danced for a living or dance was part of their fitness for the entertainment industry. They were on commercials, music videos and in performances. No one ever had an unkind word to say to me maybe because they sensed that I was ‘serious’ in my efforts and bliss would break out across my being occasionally.
I remember the first time, it was a routine to On Broadway by George Benson. Suddenly it wasn’t work, a memorized routine or watching others trying to synchronize. It flowed from outside and within My feet went where they were supposed to go, all by themselves. And I couldn’t stop.
I was still never much of a dancer, never performed. The only role once offered to me was to play a stationary tree. They were trying to include me but, no, thank you. After a year or so I stopped going to the class, still a desire to dance but didn’t feel that class was where I needed to be. And I had proved, to myself at least, that I could dance. And that was my dance experience for the next 25 years. I no longer felt socially or personally blocked from dancing just not many opportunities crossing my path.
But come relive that first time with me; kick ball change, cross step, cross step….http://tinyurl.com/p26umtn
Murph
Recycles dryer sheets
Always loved music, but I was never taught to dance. I tried picking up things on my own, but the fear of looking foolish generally keeps me seated.
As a women, was never a big dancer, especially slow dancing. The reason was because I was uncomfortably turned on or feared I might be. I really hate it when other women want to dance with my DH. Now I am older, I think I would enjoy dancing with my DH more but I would still be bother by other women wanting to dance with him.
harllee
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
My DH is such a good dancer women are always asking him to dance. Sometimes he feels like he has to say yes to be polite. I try not to be jealous but I do speak up if I feel like it is cutting into my own dance time!
aja8888
Moderator Emeritus
Here's 10 minutes of impromptu work by George Benson at the Cafe with the Village Underground:
https://youtu.be/6jdH1T8hc9c
troutnut1
Recycles dryer sheets
The alcohol required almost killed me. Fortunately by age 45 I gave up alcohol and any ideas of dancing. I only recall dancing once when we first met in 1983. We were both pretty drunk and don’t remember much about it. She married me anyway in 1987 and I’m so glad dancing wasn’t a requirement.
I do love music and playing guitar. But I don’t get the dancing thing at all.
I do love music and playing guitar. But I don’t get the dancing thing at all.
I grew up in a small Texas town where the dance hall was about the only big social activity once a month. That Texas 2 step is probably what turned me off to dancing. Sweaty, drunk guys groping me if I said yes to dance, calling me a stuck up...b...if I said no. I gravitated more to rock and roll, but now I find most places for dancing are just too loud for me. I prefer to listen to music at home where I can choose what I want to hear and set the volume and if I feel inclined to move with it, its usually a form of exercise.
audreyh1
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Oops - I didn’t mean to leave off an M!
sunnysideup
Recycles dryer sheets
DH wanted to take lessons 20 years ago. We did, but never practiced, so we didn’t learn much.
Fast forward to 2016 when we were both retired and there were ballroom lessons locally that were reasonable, coupled with dances where we could actually do the dances we learned.
It was never easy practicing, and learning new steps requires a lot of patience from me because he still gets frustrated while learning.
But with covid all around us, we just started dancing again...I recently asked him if he enjoys dancing the steps he knows well, and he actually said yes. (But he still doesn’t like learning new steps.) And yet he and I are trying to learn one new step pattern a month at home...
So I am married to a man who enjoys the fruits of the hard labor of learning steps and patterns, and whom I can attest, really leads well when he is comfortable with the steps.
Fast forward to 2016 when we were both retired and there were ballroom lessons locally that were reasonable, coupled with dances where we could actually do the dances we learned.
It was never easy practicing, and learning new steps requires a lot of patience from me because he still gets frustrated while learning.
But with covid all around us, we just started dancing again...I recently asked him if he enjoys dancing the steps he knows well, and he actually said yes. (But he still doesn’t like learning new steps.) And yet he and I are trying to learn one new step pattern a month at home...
So I am married to a man who enjoys the fruits of the hard labor of learning steps and patterns, and whom I can attest, really leads well when he is comfortable with the steps.
martyp
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
I will admit to really truly hating dancing . . . until my mid 40's. I didn't even dance when home alone. Then my wife and I lamented that we were leading separate lives. Her hobbies and interests were no longer overlapping mine. We decided to take dance lessons as a "togetherness activity". It took us a year to get through the beginners stage (beginners hell) but eventually we started going out to clubs for social dancing. It really helped that I had a partner throughout the process. The first year of social dancing was anxiety producing but in a fun way. Eventually it became relaxing in the sense that it took my mind off the stress from my j*b. Now 20 years later (and divorced and remarried) I am still dancing every week. I am a Salsa dancer. It is a great dance community of all ages.
Covid shutdowns have obviously put a stop to social dancing. It is hard to imagine anything that is riskier. Dancing is a close contact aerobic exercise (mostly light exercise). You are breathing directly into your partners face. Fortunately, I am living in Bangkok, Thailand. There have not been any locally transmitted Covid cases since last May. Social dancing started up again in September and I've returned to dancing.
Covid shutdowns have obviously put a stop to social dancing. It is hard to imagine anything that is riskier. Dancing is a close contact aerobic exercise (mostly light exercise). You are breathing directly into your partners face. Fortunately, I am living in Bangkok, Thailand. There have not been any locally transmitted Covid cases since last May. Social dancing started up again in September and I've returned to dancing.
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Men do not dance because men tend to play basketball, football, baseball, etc. Dancing is generally not taught in high school PE classes. Most people learn how to dance from friends. Here are some of my observations:
1. If you go to a dance studio, women outnumber men about 5 to 1.
2. If a guy knows how to dance, he becomes very popular with the ladies.
3. If you have a girl friend or wife, I suggest learning how to dance together by watching dance videos or learning from friends or a professional instructor.
4. Dancing can be romantic. This is illustrating by the link below: This dance is slow and suitable for beginners but you still need an instructor.
5. Dance trainees are intimidated because there is that fear of looking bad. However, an instructor can help a trainee overcome this fear. If you go clubbing, a beginner will know less than 10 moves and they move repetitive. However, an experienced dancer at a club knows dozen of moves....but he or she started as a trainee.
6. Once you know how to dance, your confidence will be sky high and you will have fun going clubbing. If you are a guy, women will ask you: "Can you teach me how to dance?"
7. The second half of the video is typical of a dance studio which there is a lack of guys. Generally, girls are forced to dance with each other.
1. If you go to a dance studio, women outnumber men about 5 to 1.
2. If a guy knows how to dance, he becomes very popular with the ladies.
3. If you have a girl friend or wife, I suggest learning how to dance together by watching dance videos or learning from friends or a professional instructor.
4. Dancing can be romantic. This is illustrating by the link below: This dance is slow and suitable for beginners but you still need an instructor.
5. Dance trainees are intimidated because there is that fear of looking bad. However, an instructor can help a trainee overcome this fear. If you go clubbing, a beginner will know less than 10 moves and they move repetitive. However, an experienced dancer at a club knows dozen of moves....but he or she started as a trainee.
6. Once you know how to dance, your confidence will be sky high and you will have fun going clubbing. If you are a guy, women will ask you: "Can you teach me how to dance?"
7. The second half of the video is typical of a dance studio which there is a lack of guys. Generally, girls are forced to dance with each other.
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martyp
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Here is another perspective on the benefits of dancing - it may delay dementia
https://blogs.biomedcentral.com/bmcseriesblog/2016/04/04/keep-dancing-turns-good-brain/
"In 2003, research published in the New England Journal of Medicine found that dancing can reduce the onset of dementia. The 21-year study of senior citizens, aged 75 and older, was led by the Albert Einstein College of Medicine in New York City, funded by the National Institute on Aging. They measured each participant’s mental alertness as a means of monitoring the rates of dementia, including Alzheimer’s disease.
The researchers studied a range of cognitive and physical activities, such as reading; writing; doing crossword puzzles; playing cards; playing musical instruments; dancing; walking; tennis; swimming and golf. Surprisingly, dance was the one activity that was good for the mind, significantly reducing dementia risk. Regular dancing reduced the risk of dementia by 76%, twice as much as reading. Doing crossword puzzles at least four days a week reduced the risk by 47%, while cycling and swimming offered no benefit at all.
dance may still be seen as recreational while its clinical value is overlooked
But, not all forms of dancing offer the same cognitive benefits. Working on memorized sequences, might improve your performance, however it doesn’t create new neural pathways. The theory goes that the more pathways your brain has the easier it can access stored information and the better your memory."
https://blogs.biomedcentral.com/bmcseriesblog/2016/04/04/keep-dancing-turns-good-brain/
"In 2003, research published in the New England Journal of Medicine found that dancing can reduce the onset of dementia. The 21-year study of senior citizens, aged 75 and older, was led by the Albert Einstein College of Medicine in New York City, funded by the National Institute on Aging. They measured each participant’s mental alertness as a means of monitoring the rates of dementia, including Alzheimer’s disease.
The researchers studied a range of cognitive and physical activities, such as reading; writing; doing crossword puzzles; playing cards; playing musical instruments; dancing; walking; tennis; swimming and golf. Surprisingly, dance was the one activity that was good for the mind, significantly reducing dementia risk. Regular dancing reduced the risk of dementia by 76%, twice as much as reading. Doing crossword puzzles at least four days a week reduced the risk by 47%, while cycling and swimming offered no benefit at all.
dance may still be seen as recreational while its clinical value is overlooked
But, not all forms of dancing offer the same cognitive benefits. Working on memorized sequences, might improve your performance, however it doesn’t create new neural pathways. The theory goes that the more pathways your brain has the easier it can access stored information and the better your memory."
harllee
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
I think that one benefit for the mind that dance has over solitary activities is the social aspect. Pre Covid we had a group we regularly danced with --we met many good friends that way.
harllee
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Marty I am jealous that you have been able to start dancing again in Bangkok. I am afraid it will be a very long time before it is safe to dance here in U.S. I am really missing dancing--especially the social aspects and it is a fun way to get exercise. I love Salsa dancing!
I agree...Here is a cute video of a 90 years old grandfather dancing with his grand daughters. He does not look like he has dementia. Translation of the song: "Dance (or Fly)....or your life will be over."
jollystomper
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Men not dancing varies by culture and family. In some cultures men not knowing how to dance can be worse than not playing a sport very well. My years as a DJ, doing the music at social occasions for groups of varying ethnic and economic backgrounds, really brought this home to me.
You do not always need a class - in some families dancing is taught and passed down. My parents could dance, and it was passed down through me and my siblings. DW and I would dance at home and show our kids "old school" moves.
In college you knew the guys who could dance (or a least who the ladies thought looked good on the dance floor) when "Sadie Hawkins" dances where held, where only the woman could ask the men to dance. For a man that could be an enjoyable time, or somewhat embarrassing.
As a young adult, more than one female friend would tell me or imply that part of their evaluation of whether a man might be, shall we say, "rhythmic in intimate moments", was how he moved on the dance floor.
Definitely as one gets older fewer men are at dances. Since the age of 50 or so, I (and my other male friends who dance) get asked to dance by other women (with our wives/SO permission) more and more when our social groups I go to dances (which she permits). This less due to being a good dancer and more due to just not enough men present who want to dance.
You do not always need a class - in some families dancing is taught and passed down. My parents could dance, and it was passed down through me and my siblings. DW and I would dance at home and show our kids "old school" moves.
In college you knew the guys who could dance (or a least who the ladies thought looked good on the dance floor) when "Sadie Hawkins" dances where held, where only the woman could ask the men to dance. For a man that could be an enjoyable time, or somewhat embarrassing.
As a young adult, more than one female friend would tell me or imply that part of their evaluation of whether a man might be, shall we say, "rhythmic in intimate moments", was how he moved on the dance floor.
Definitely as one gets older fewer men are at dances. Since the age of 50 or so, I (and my other male friends who dance) get asked to dance by other women (with our wives/SO permission
) more and more when our social groups I go to dances (which she permits). This less due to being a good dancer and more due to just not enough men present who want to dance.scrabbler1
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I will say that during my square dance years, when my regular dance partner could not attend once in a while, I became very popular with the other unattached women to dance with them that night. Sometimes, I would be the floater and dance with a woman, married or not, who was due to sit out that 10-minute dance tip. As a good square dancer, they were always happy to dance with me.
As someone who was always picked last in gym class decades ago, I found this very refreshing to be the first on all the women's dance partner's lists.
As someone who was always picked last in gym class decades ago, I found this very refreshing to be the first on all the women's dance partner's lists.
