43, failed early retiree, seeking non-financial advice

[Jkirk]

That is a big leap on top of your previous habits. For me it is a bridge too far. We are uprooting but staying in the same state and about the same distance from the big city. We will be 1 mile from the Safeway and 1.3 from a Home Depot or Costco, and it suits us fine.

We relocated 8 times in the 22 years we’ve been married. We made a deal long ago that when I retire, my wife decides where we go. It was her turn to decide. I don’t care for it here, but she’s happy.

 

[Jkirk]

Is part of the issue with retirement boredom that you are stuck at home until the kids are grown? Are you able to at least go for long summer trips? Does your current budget allow long summer travel with the kids?

I retirement before my 40th, but we had no kids, so we were able to take off immediately to enjoy our dream of extensive travel. We never looked back.

I think that’s definitely part of it, and not just the travel part. About a month after retiring, my then 10 year old said something like “Are you going to be lazy all day again and not go to work?” That stung a bit. Her aunts, uncles, and friends’ parents are struggling to make ends meet and I’m choosing to not work and financially we’re doing quite well. Made me question the example I was setting.

 

[Jkirk]

On reading this, my first thought was of the TV series FARGO Season 1. In the first episode, Lorne Malvo tells Lester Nygaard "Your problem is you've spent your whole life thinking there are rules. There aren't."

S-word alert:

Age 17-42 in the military: yes, I’m very conditioned by rules and norms. I’m working on letting that go. BTW, I’d never heard of that show, looks good. I’ll check it out, thanks!

 

[Jkirk]

My brother retired early, got bored and now seas only cuts grass at a local golf course. It’s about 20 hours a week, and he makes no money to speak of, but he likes being outdoors and spending time with similar-minded coworkers.
That’s all strange to me. I’m retired and rarely bored, but my personality is quite laid back.

Yeah, we’re all wired a bit differently! I suppose I’m more like your brother.

 

[Koolau]

Age 17-42 in the military: yes, I’m very conditioned by rules and norms. I’m working on letting that go. BTW, I’d never heard of that show, looks good. I’ll check it out, thanks!

Yes, one of my "hobbies" as I grow older is watching TV. I know it's not for everyone, but it can be an enjoyable hobby. The main thing is to limit the time so as not to be a couch potato - unless you want to be (heh, heh, no rules!)

Season 1 of Fargo is terrific. Billie Bob Thornton makes the show though there are a bunch of really eccentric, interesting characters as well. Never got into season 2 at all. YMMV