FIREd @ 26, bored to absolute tears!

[Blue Collar Fire]

Hi all! Long time lurker, first time poster! Glad to finally be a participant in this wonderful community.

FIREd @ 26 through a self started small construction business, the profits of which were wholly rolled into income producing real estate during the Great Recession, all the while living very frugally. The timing was impeccable and my story couldn't be duplicated today nearly as easily. The money part of the FIRE equation is solved. Turning 37 this year and realizing I've more or less wasted the last decade of life doing nothing meaningful. I came to realize the motivation for my success was extrinsic, specifically the goal was to make Dad proud. Goal Accomplished! When he passed on 8 years ago, I sort of sat down and said "ok, now what, and why bother.... nobody to celebrate with anymore". The rest of my family is broke, so they don't want to hear about it, and we all know money is taboo and nobody wants to see you succeed or celebrate with you without envy or jealousy. So at this point the boredom is getting intense, to the point of depression. (First world problems here... don't lynch me for my apparent complaints, but consider it all in context. I know it could be much, much worse) It's turned into a constant paradox. Miserable doing nothing, but contemporaneously don't want to do anything. Don't like the cold, so I set sail for the sunny south in the winter only to get even more bored and end up going back to the Frozen Wastelands of the Midwest after about a week. Rinse and repeat several times per season. Bought a house down south to rehab, get there and don't even want to work on it. The grass looks greener until I'm there, then the grass looks greener back in the other location. Not much interest in starting or growing another business unless I can do it alone, because good help is nonexistent. Don't really want a J-O-B. Very little interest in volunteering. I'm an introvert by nature (hardcore INTJ, for those of you who are interested in Myers-Briggs), and becoming more so with each passing day due in part to isolation, so anything involving a bunch of people doesn't sound pleasant. Again, paradoxically, I love educating young people 1-on-1 about the wonderful world of FIRE since our culture of consumers is so woefully undereducated in personal finance, but having attained it myself I'm incredibly dissatisfied. Thought about a y-tube channel or something along those lines to spread the FIRE gospel amongst the youth, but I don't want to get nailed for "giving financial advice" and the material is all out there already anyway.

TL,DR I guess my question for those of you who have happily FIREd at a young age is this: What do you do to fill your days with purpose, fulfillment, and meaning? I don't want to look back when I'm 47 and have this same feeling of having wasted another decade of life without having done something worthy of inclusion in the obituary.

Open to your thoughts, and thank you for the warm welcome!

 

[38Chevy454]

Your story seems to be the poster child for the expression "you need to have something to retire to". Do you have any hobbies? What do you like to do for fun?
Nothing wrong with starting a new job/business if you want to and make your life feel more fulfilling. Why not try the FIRE YouTube channel? Or maybe teach adult ed classes in evenings? You have advantages that you don't need to make any profit.

 

[Spock]

So I had this (bucket) list of things to do when I was "retired and had the time".
Shelves of books to read.
Things to do.
Mapped routes of cross-country motorcycle rides.
etc.
Well... the font shrank on all those books while they were sitting on the shelf
an aging parent with dementia prevents me from making any plans
and an undiagnoseable pain in my hip has kept me off the bike for 2 years.
You're 26? "Do it now".

 

[thesemiretiredguy]

I semiretired at 55 after my final 14 year stint in the corporate world where I was bored to tears and not looking forward to going in there in the morning. Since then I have picked up a few hobbies, starting working out in earnest, became a lot more social , and in the last couple months, started blogging about my journey. It helps to write things down. You may benefit from some psychotherapy since you sound like you may some of the symptoms of depression. As for your idea to spread the gospel of FIRE to younger people, I think its a great idea and I wouldn't worry one second about teaching them something that is already out there. You can put it all together for them. Everyone on the internet gives final advice-you just need to have a disclosure statement included with your advice. [Mod Edit]

 

[OldShooter]

Lots of nonprofits would be happy to use your skills. Habitat for Humanity comes to mind; they must need supervisors, managers, project managers, etc. that would suit your construction background.

I have recently been volunteering with American Red Cross and have found the scope of what they do to be simply amazing. There, too, successful business management and project management skills would be appreciated. A surprising number of ARC's staff jobs are performed by full-time volunteers.

There are also frequent overseas construction programs organized by churches and NGOs.

I'm sure someone at a local public library could help you make a list.

 

[HI Bill]

Since I'm a little more than twice the age at which the OP FIRED, I can't really comment on how to be fulfilled after FIRE'ing so young. Except to say that for my self-image, my sense of worth, etc., I found that having and maintaining a j~b when I was younger filled my time, gave me a sense of self-worth, and gave me some social interaction (I'm also INTJ). So, back to Zelenski's 'Get a Life" tree. Figure out what you want to do for fun (hobbies, non-profits, etc.)...and if that doesn't work for your, consider becoming a financial advisor. Sounds like you already like helping out folks!

Oh, and you could always to go college or a tech school and learn something new! For me, I'd love to learn fine woodworking, throwing pottery, flying, and a few other things. If you have no motivation to learn or create, or stay in shape, or find friends, then the next decade may be as bad as the last.

 

[HadEnuff]

OP, I think you should strongly consider the possibility that it isn't boredom that's making you depressed, but depression that is making you bored. As long as you have the time, and some money, why not find some psychological/ emotional help, and see what he or she might have to offer you.
37 is not necessarily to young to retire, but it's way to young to be bored.

 

[Blue Collar Fire]

Your story seems to be the poster child for the expression "you need to have something to retire to". Do you have any hobbies? What do you like to do for fun?
Nothing wrong with starting a new job/business if you want to and make your life feel more fulfilling. Why not try the FIRE YouTube channel? Or maybe teach adult ed classes in evenings? You have advantages that you don't need to make any profit.

Something to retire to, indeed. We always hear about retiring early to "do what matters" but I'm not sure exactly what it is that matters Hobbies and fun for me involve working outside, manual skilled labor type activities, and educating. Lost interest in performing the skilled trades professionally because I allowed customers and employees to soak the fun out of it. Impossible to please, complain about cost of quality work, don't pay the bill, etc and no qualified help to be had. The tax consequence of working hard and succeeding is also a major ambition-destroyer. I'd love to do the y-tube channel, but again concerned about liability and unknown legal issues with professing what could be construed as financial advice. Thought about offering classes like you mentioned, maybe through a church or tech school, but I'm not sure I'd find the right cohort. I suspect most who would attend such classes would be those trying to right the ship after burying themselves in a heap of debt. Haven't been there/done that so I can't advise on how to fix it. Really rather teach a high school personal finance class... Get to 'em before they have a chance to run their finances off in the ditch. Not willing to spend 4 years on a degree to "learn" what I already know through experience though. It's such a shame to me that we spend at least 13 years teaching kids how to make money, and don't teach them what to do with it once they get it. No wonder we here at the forum are statistical anomalies. Guess a population of clueless consumers is better for the economy...

 

[EvrClrx311]

As a fellow INTJ, who is also 37, I can tell you that our worst nightmare is nothing to learn, nothing to master, nothing to do... while everyone else shares 'dreams' and visions of sitting on a beach, doing nothing, relaxing, sipping mixed drinks, we see this as a waste of life, waste of time, it depresses us.

INTJs are wired to solve problems. I'll share something I wrote a few years ago to another INTJ on this board in a similar situation:

INTJs constantly strive to improve their lives and of those around them. They have an internal desire to make a difference in the world and are very analytical, innovative and creative people. These are also the types who most often make it to FIRE, because they enjoy delayed gratification and see the big picture in their lives. What drives these personalities in life is making a difference and feeling they are in the pursuit of something (be it, knowledge, projects, experiences...etc.)

There is no reason to suppress that desire to seek out the opposite of 'doing nothing'. Do with your freedom what you wish. Whether that be sitting around and being lazy... or picking up hobbies and tasks that others might consider "work or chores". The only thing that is important, is what you want to do and enjoy it.

Find something that fascinates you and invest your time in it. I also love to teach, and I've also thought about creating a website. I even wrote my own FIRE calc, but realized the one here is good enough, so no reason to put another one out there. I still built one, simply to run some alternate evaluations of historical situations. Mainly I was interested to understand how the year we're born directly effects how long it takes us to FIRE. the idea that something so outside our control could have such an impact on our path... fascinates me.

Anyway... find your passion. More than comfort... more than happiness... passions are what give life meaning.

 

[Blue Collar Fire]

As a fellow INTJ, who is also 37, I can tell you that our worst nightmare is nothing to learn, nothing to master, nothing to do... while everyone else shares 'dreams' and visions of sitting on a beach, doing nothing, relaxing, sipping mixed drinks, we see this as a waste of life, waste of time, it depresses us.

INTJs are wired to solve problems. I'll share something I wrote a few years ago to another INTJ on this board in a similar situation:



Find something that fascinates you and invest your time in it. I also love to teach, and I've also thought about creating a website. I even wrote my own FIRE calc, but realized the one here is good enough, so no reason to put another one out there. I still built one, simply to run some alternate evaluations of historical situations. Mainly I was interested to understand how the year we're born directly effects how long it takes us to FIRE. the idea that something so outside our control could have such an impact on our path... fascinates me.

Anyway... find your passion. More than comfort... more than happiness... passions are what give life meaning.

I agree wholeheartedly with everything you shared (big surprise!) The thirst for and pursuit of knowledge for INTJs is ever present and as necessary as the air we breathe. I've fallen into the habit of spending an inordinate amount of time on YouTube in the past few years, both to gain knowledge and to pass the time. So far, I've learned how to drive a semi (passed the class A CDL test), proficiently operate a long reach excavator, how to climb and prune or cut down large trees like a pro Climbing Arborist, how to haft axes, play guitar, and a few other odds and ends. It's wonderful to add to an already diverse skillset, but ultimately, we INTJs need to exercise our "Te" function and get those skills out into the world. As you have probably experienced, once we master a new skill, we quickly become bored and move on. That's happened. I've taken jobs driving big trucks, cutting trees, and running excavators, but quickly got tired of having a j-o-b and more or less stopped doing it. Additionally, since a lot of my interests revolve around being and working outside, I'm shut down half the year due to winter in the Midwest. Hence the interest in FL. Don't really want to run a business anymore, so I guess the answer is to head south where it's warm year round and do it all for free. Ends up racking up expenses with no revenue to offset the costs, but something to do I suppose. Just grasping for straws and thinking out loud. Finding a new mountain to climb seems to be a moving target... Thank you for your input, it's spot on.

 

[OldShooter]

... I guess the answer is to head south where it's warm year round and do it all for free. Ends up racking up expenses with no revenue to offset the costs ...

That's why I mentioned Habitat first. You can move around the country as you like and probably always find Habitat chapters and projects that need your skills. As far as costs, my son works on Habitat houses occasionally and I don't think he has any costs except maybe driving to and from the job sites. https://www.habitat.org/volunteer

There is a lot of chatter these days about "tiny houses" as affordable housing. I'd bet that there are NGOs building these, too. That might be a different sort of experience.

 

[simple girl]

Finding a new mountain to climb seems to be a moving target... Thank you for your input, it's spot on.

Does that bother you, or is it just an observation you made? In other words, is it a problem that the mountain keeps moving? If so, why?

What is the last thing you did that made you feel fulfilled?

 

[ckelly78z]

The problem the OP is going to experience in a full retirement scenario, is that he never experienced the mind numbing 30+ years of trudging into work, and dealing with B.S. on a daily basis. He also never had to try to schedule family time/vacations around work priorities, never had to take phone calls/answer emails on your sick days, never had to fight for promotions in a cut throat environment, never had to experience reverse racism/sexism, never had to deal with a packed commute, and compete for parking.

You will never appreciate a slack schedule if you never had an overloaded schedule with daily stress.

 

[Dtail]

The problem the OP is going to experience in a full retirement scenario, is that he never experienced the mind numbing 30+ years of trudging into work, and dealing with B.S. on a daily basis. He also never had to try to schedule family time/vacations around work priorities, never had to take phone calls/answer emails on your sick days, never had to fight for promotions in a cut throat environment, never had to experience reverse racism/sexism, never had to deal with a packed commute, and compete for parking.

You will never appreciate a slack schedule if you never had an overloaded schedule with daily stress.

Sounds about right.
Had a super stressful but fulfilling career and can't imagine being bored.

 

[Blue Collar Fire]

Does that bother you, or is it just an observation you made? In other words, is it a problem that the mountain keeps moving? If so, why?

What is the last thing you did that made you feel fulfilled?

Mostly an observation, and a frustration. It's a very common trait among folks with my personality profile. Frustrating because I can't find a "passion". Find something interesting, research it to death and master it, get bored and move on. Repeat. Running out of interesting topics on which to seek knowledge.

The last fulfilling activity... Embarrassingly simple couple days that would be boring to most. I have a small farm not far from home, and I spent most of 2 days repairing about 1000 feet of dilapidated 5 strand wire fence that runs along one side of a field there. First time I'd done fence work, so there was a learning curve. Quickly got the hang of it. Replaced a bunch of posts and several of the runs of wire, new tensioners. It was supremely enjoyable because I was alone, outside in warm sunny weather, learning, working with my hands and brain on something rather inconsequential, making an improvement over what was there before, with no customer or anyone else around to watch or criticize the job and no time frame in which to finish it. It was a genuine "state of flow". It's been almost two years ago, and I still think about it routinely when I'm pondering what brings joy in the quest for more of said joy. Foolish and silly as it may sound, I loved every second of those 2 days and wish I had more fences to fix

 

[Blue Collar Fire]

The problem the OP is going to experience in a full retirement scenario, is that he never experienced the mind numbing 30+ years of trudging into work, and dealing with B.S. on a daily basis. He also never had to try to schedule family time/vacations around work priorities, never had to take phone calls/answer emails on your sick days, never had to fight for promotions in a cut throat environment, never had to experience reverse racism/sexism, never had to deal with a packed commute, and compete for parking.

You will never appreciate a slack schedule if you never had an overloaded schedule with daily stress.

You're very correct. I only had a "real job" for 4 years. Never went to college, as I knew my skills were more than sufficient for the type of work I wanted to do. At 23, I took a huge risk, quit an excellent job with benefits and a new company truck, and started a business from scratch. I've been self employed since. Just different life choices. We did over a million in sales in my second year with just 3 employees, so I'm well acquainted with an overloaded schedule, stress, and 18 hour days, and when you start a new business there are no sick days or vacations. Didn't have to fight for promotions, but I did have to fight for customers in a highly competitive environment. Your point stands though, as I didn't do it for 30 years. I hit the point of "enough" and stopped. Slack schedule is lovely, but the issue remains of what to do with it. I guess the folks who endured the 30 years of trudgery just set about doing everything they didn't have time for before. Done with that list. Now what..

 

[simple girl]

Mostly an observation, and a frustration. It's a very common trait among folks with my personality profile. Frustrating because I can't find a "passion". Find something interesting, research it to death and master it, get bored and move on. Repeat. Running out of interesting topics on which to seek knowledge.

Perhaps you might want to ask yourself, why does it frustrate me that the target keeps moving? That I can't find one passion that fulfills me? Is there some way that I can learn to be happy with how I am?

Can you accept that you are the type of person who needs to always be learning and mastering something new, rather than finding one particular passion? Who says you have to have a passion?

It's hard for me to empathize with running out of topics of interest. I'm an INTJ as well. I never run out of things to research...always something else on my list! (and yes, I do keep a list, and refer to it when needed for inspiration/next adventure).

The last fulfilling activity... Embarrassingly simple couple days that would be boring to most. I have a small farm not far from home, and I spent most of 2 days repairing about 1000 feet of dilapidated 5 strand wire fence that runs along one side of a field there. First time I'd done fence work, so there was a learning curve. Quickly got the hang of it. Replaced a bunch of posts and several of the runs of wire, new tensioners. It was supremely enjoyable because I was alone, outside in warm sunny weather, learning, working with my hands and brain on something rather inconsequential, making an improvement over what was there before, with no customer or anyone else around to watch or criticize the job and no time frame in which to finish it. It was a genuine "state of flow". It's been almost two years ago, and I still think about it routinely when I'm pondering what brings joy in the quest for more of said joy. Foolish and silly as it may sound, I loved every second of those 2 days and wish I had more fences to fix

It doesn't sound foolish at all! Can you run with this idea? I'm sure there are plenty of service projects that would WELCOME your skill and interest! Just apply yourself more fully to this idea, with your requirements for the ideal situation.

 

[38Chevy454]

Replying again. I am also INTJ, and was an engineer for my primary working career. So the problem solving and quest for knowledge, or seeing through a project to completion is all too familiar.
I even went back to a part time job working in an auto parts store, which is what I did working my way through college. I called it my J-O-B scholarship, 25 hours per week during school and then always worked a college related summer job to pump up the resume. I got kind of bored at the auto parts job, plus I am now vacationing in warmer Florida. So quit the auto parts job. I didn't need the money, it was just something to do.
Whether one calls it fortunate, I do all the work around my house, have severe old cars I build and work on, and generally keep busy enough that I am not wanting to return to full time work as engineer.
Maybe being older and having put up with the corporate BS makes me appreciate being retired more. Maybe OP can try doing some volunteering that can utilize his skills? Or teach something, only problem I see is schools will have a lot of education paper bias, i.e. they will not recognize school of hard knocks and want some type of degrees. I think their loss, but it's reality in education environment.

 

[brewer12345]

I will cry a few tears for you to be retired at 26...

Get a job! Damn kids. Get off my lawn.

 

[exnavynuke]

If it were me, I'd follow something like this as a blueprint:
https://www.youtube.com/user/briantrautman/videos?view=0&sort=da&flow=grid

 

[RobbieB]

At 26 I was living with my girlfriend (later married) in a condo I just bought working my first job out of school and had a net worth of about 10 grand.

The OP is so far removed from my reality I can offer no advice.

 

[REWahoo]

Nothing wrong with you that a few years in the military wouldn't fix...

 

[GrayHare]

If you master things quickly and get bored, you need to take on tougher challenges. Consider efforts others have tried and failed at, or things deemed impossible. Find a cure for cancer, develop a high speed rocket that can carry a camera, or a person, to another star system. Invent a battery that charges in seconds but that can power a car for a thousand miles. There are all sorts of problems thought intractable that take someone like yourself with skill and persistence to solve.

 

[GreenEggs]

Build an airplane or a boat. Then learn to fly or sail around the world.

You learned to play the guitar, join a band. That's where all the chicks are, right?

Have you tried painting or sculpting?

Racing? Cars, boats, motorcycles, go carts? Extreme sports? Be a race promoter. (I just discovered Thundercat boat racing. It doesn't seem to be in the US yet. Check it out on YouTube.)

How about breaking a Guinness record?

Acting classes? Everybody wants to be a star!

Write a book?

You could be a private eye!

Hike the Appalachian Trail?

How about opening a BBQ joint?

How many kids do you have? Those will keep you busy.

Choose a worthy cause and work towards making the world a better place? Plant trees, help the homeless, help kids, battered women, feed the poor. Teach them how to build homes and feed themselves.

Do you like animals? You can spend a lot of time raising, training, breeding, racing, showing, etc. animals. If you really like animals you could start a zoo.

If you're funny you could try your hand at comedy.

Life's too short to sit around bored.

Oh, and btw, nobody's found Bigfoot yet!

 

[Sunset]

26 is too young to retire, you are simply wasting all your potential.

Imagine if Christopher Columbus, or Einstein, or Howard Hughes, or Warren Buffet, or Dr Salk, or Edison had retired at 26 !!

We would all still be in the UK, poor, with polio in the dark