sorry for the drama!

[NotJustDreaming]

That's a great idea Shortstop!

I think I'll bring it up! I've read that method of valuation before but always excluded pension from net worth. Shortly after we had that pivotal conversation I was feeling pretty frustrated. I wasn't sure what the point of further savings was anymore. I need goals and target dates and concrete things to look forward to and strive for.

A goal without a plan is just a dream. I like to daydream but I plan on making those dreams happen. Too bad I couldn't continue that sentence 'with or without him' as that would take care of that. But even though he's got no financial savvy, he's my mate. And the father of my children. Oh and an equal owner of the assets. Oh yeah, and the one with the imminent pension... Yeah, I guess it has to be with him for sure ;0)

 

[NotJustDreaming]

Sorry Nemo2, the quotes are not working for me. That kind of money is great to have. He sometimes even gets caught up in fantasies of extreme wealth though. Very unlikely of course. No matter how long he stays at work.

I forwarded him a copy of a post on the marginal utility of money. I put a copy in the bathroom as well.

If DH would just have a mild amount of interest in this stuff I think it would push him past any reservations that he has. I am certainly not going to start arguing with him about money.

 

[AnIntentionalRoad]

You're funny. Glad to have you in the forum!

 

[NotJustDreaming]

You're funny. Glad to have you in the forum!

Ha! Thanks. Though sadly not really.
Just that iddy bit of exposure to cruising, on your sidebar, makes me reconsider the maintenance thing. Maybe a college course on how to maintain a Diesel engine is in my future.

 

[Bestwifeever]

Naw, not 2017. I didn't have.any libations and my week has been just fine. I can't imagine forgetting this again.
Bestwifeever, I completely agree with you about scaling back if required. It's true though... DH does want to be able to buy whatever he wants whenever he wants. But here's the rub.... He hardly ever buys anything.

It's perplexing.

I remember early on showing DH the numbers of expected retirement income and our barebones budget, which the income exceeded. He just looked at me and said he didn't want to ever have to live on a barebones budget. So we waited.

 

[NotJustDreaming]

I'd wait too for sure. But it's not barebones.

My twelve year old babysits the six year old after school until one of us gets home. So we no longer have a nanny. I don't forgo cable because we are on a barebones budget. We don't have it because our kids would end up glued to the tv when we're not looking. We splurge on things that matter to us. Like vacations and some electronics. Music lessons. But even the kids don't really want stuff very often.

Once we paid off the mortgage, that money was saved. With the nanny gone, that money goes right into the bank. We spend about $36k per year on fixed recurring expenses. And that is without a mortgage or child care costs. Aside from things like property taxes, utilities and transportation costs for one car, that's all just spending.

So I've projected that budget into the future. It includes weekly house cleaning costs, piano lessons for the kids, wifi (there's no going back once you've got that). But not travel as that varies and aside from still trying to find the best value is not a constrained budgetary item. I've never figured out how to categorize it.

With 30 years service (with the buyback) my husbands pension is expected to be just over $60k now. Thanks in part to stellar returns this year and our savings ratio, our investments are at $730k now. After expenses and our average vacation cost, I've forecasted just shy of $100k savings this year. Once I hit 60, we get another $27k valued with today's figures for my pension. The house is paid for. RESPs topped up.

Compared to what we live off of, that's just an insane amount of cash flow. I know if I tried I could easily figure out ways to spend it. But based on our goals, it more than covers what we need.

Hence my frustration these days.

I know not everyone looks at money the same way. I really believe it buys time. I'm trading it for my freedom. I work at work and then I work at home. Trying to balance the two at this point doesn't make sense to me.

See, now I've got myself all glum. It's not even about travel and spending time with my family anymore. It's all about me. I try not to be so selfish.

You know I've just realized... It's not about needing something to push my husband over the edge. I want him to push me.

"You know what honey, you should retire" ...