Decluttering

[Golden sunsets]

So DH and I, (mostly me) talk about moving to a home with a better floor plan so that we can age in place. Number 1 on the list is a 1st Floor Master, 2nd in importance is exterior grounds maintenance (mowing, landscaping maintenance and snow plowing) managed and provided by someone other than ourselves. Numbers 3,4,5, etc. are various other preferences for room sizes and configurations.

I feel it would be better to do this in the next 1-2 years as we are now 71/74. DH likes our current home, as do I, but it will become increasingly impractical as we get older, so sooner than later seems wize.

Well we finally found the perfect home, perfect floor plan, beautiful PUD community with luxurious grounds. Even DH approves. The home is a similar size to ours (2,900 SF) and the floor plan is perfect. The sales price is about 150K more than ours, but that's OK.

But we realized we'll have to buy our next home before we sell ours and our home, although in tip top shape, is filled to the gills with "our stuff". We can swing owning 2 homes at once but I wouldn't want to be in that position for very long.

Soooooo we have spent the last month sorting through a lifetime's worth of belongings. The last time we moved was 1991, so the "stuff" has grown and grown. Our 3 prior moves, although always to larger homes, involved decluttering prior to the move. I'm not the garage sale type so we've been gathering piles for the junk man, the local Goodwill shop, the local ASPCA (bedding/towels) and man it has been a huge job. Making "keep" or "trash" decisions with DH has been tough. Some if this "stuff" hasn't seen the light of day for 20 years or more. I mean, we have my parent's "good dishes ", DH's grandmother's "good dishes" and his parent's "good dishes" and three sets of silver flatware. Not to mention our own set of good dishes that I force myself to use once a year at Thanksgiving, even though it can't go into the dishwasher as it has silver banded rims. And our kids of course have no interest in any of this dishware.

Anyone with similar stories or tips to share?

 

[aja8888]

So DH and I, (mostly me) talk about moving to a home with a better floor plan so that we can age in place. Number 1 on the list is a 1st Floor Master, 2nd in importance is exterior grounds maintenance (mowing, landscaping maintenance and snow plowing) managed and provided by someone other than ourselves. Numbers 3,4,5, etc. are various other preferences for room sizes and configurations.

I feel it would be better to do this in the next 1-2 years as we are now 71/74. DH likes our current home, as do I, but it will become increasingly impractical as we get older, so sooner than later seems wize.

Well we finally found the perfect home, perfect floor plan, beautiful PUD community with luxurious grounds. Even DH approves. The home is a similar size to ours (2,900 SF) and the floor plan is perfect. The sales price is about 150K more than ours, but that's OK.

But we realized we'll have to buy our next home before we sell ours and our home, although in tip top shape, is filled to the gills with "our stuff". We can swing owning 2 homes at once but I wouldn't want to be in that position for very long.

Soooooo we have spent the last month sorting through a lifetime's worth of belongings. The last time we moved was 1991, so the "stuff" has grown and grown. Our 3 prior moves, although always to larger homes, involved decluttering prior to the move. I'm not the garage sale type so we've been gathering piles for the junk man, the local Goodwill shop, the local ASPCA (bedding/towels) and man it has been a huge job. Making "keep" or "trash" decisions with DH has been tough. Some if this "stuff" hasn't seen the light of day for 20 years or more. I mean, we have my parent's "good dishes ", DH's grandmother's "good dishes" and his parent's "good dishes" and three sets of silver flatware. Not to mention our own set of good dishes that I force myself to use once a year at Thanksgiving, even though it can't go into the dishwasher as it has silver banded rims. And our kids of course have no interest in any of this dishware.

Anyone with similar stories or tips to share?

No tips, but a story...

We went thru the same thing about 5 years ago. We downsized about 500 sq. ft. and found the home with a master on the first floor (one floor home actually). And it's in a small 55 + community about 20 years old with a very low HOA fee which covers all outdoor maintenance, trash pickup, house painted every 7 years, etc ....all for $180/month.

The stuff? Kids didn't want it and even turned down grandma's salt and pepper shaker collection! We just donated things, threw out things, gave things away, etc.

Oh, we are STILL decluttering today!

 

[Bigdawg]

DW and I were both active military. Not as many moves as many military folks have experienced but still a few. DW is fantastic and making things go away. There is a hoarder hiding inside of me that my wife crushes as soon as it rears it ugly head. I follow her footsteps and we get rid of things as soon as they somehow find there way into the house. The only things off limits are high school year books basically. She has probably gotten rid of literally hundreds of items that I don't even know about. It took me 5 years to figure out that she threw out my HS football jersey. She is mean. Best of luck to you.

 

[tony d tiger]

If you figure out the key to decluttering (outside of a mean spouse) please let me know; I've got a garage full of "stuff" that hasn't moved in years - even tried to sell a couple motorcycles a few years ago - but I've yet to eliminate any of these things.
Also been in the same house for 20 years and starting to look for a "forever" home - but about ten years junior to you, OP. Best of luck in your pursuit.

 

[sengsational]

If you look at "blue zones", where people live healthy long lives, one commonality seems to be they live on a hill, and walk to town and back. So when I see that people want "master down" I'm wondering if that's doing a disservice for yourself.

 

[Aerides]

You might want to watch one or two episodes of "Tidying Up" with Marie Kondo on netflix. You may find it helpful towards your efforts of deciding what goes and what to keep, as well as some strategies on how to tackle different rooms and categories of stuff.

 

[aja8888]

If you look at "blue zones", where people live healthy long lives, one commonality seems to be they live on a hill, and walk to town and back. So when I see that people want "master down" I'm wondering if that's doing a disservice for yourself.

Well, for some folks a master down is appropriate. My wife has advanced COPD and is hooked to an oxygen generator 24/7/365 and climbing steps are very difficult for her. Me, I don't care one way of the other as I am a very healthy 77 year old.

A single level house has other advantages and one of them is it's easier to heat and cool. Plus, they seem to sell easier than multi-level homes (at least to seniors).

Hills? we don't have any here in South Texas unless you count highway overpasses! LOL

 

[Dtail]

Well, for some folks a master down is appropriate. My wife has advanced COPD and is hooked to an oxygen generator 24/7/365 and climbing steps are very difficult for her. Me, I don't care one way of the other as I am a very healthy 77 year old.

A single level house has other advantages and one of them is it's easier to heat and cool. Plus, they seem to sell easier than multi-level homes (at least to seniors).

Hills? we don't have any here in South Texas unless you count highway overpasses! LOL

We have a one level SFH. We would not consider a 2 story house.
Our biggest hill in Florida is 345 feet high. lol

 

[gauss]

Some questions/comments that I discuss with myself as I go through this are:

1) Take digital photos of things that you would like to preserve memories of

2) Ask yourself how hard would it be to replace something if you decide you actually need it down the road -- and at what cost?

3) How bulky vs compact is the item of consideration?

4) Will a local charity accept it?

I also don't try to do everything at the same time. If I can reduce the amount of stuff by say 50% then I am winning. A year later I can repeat the process and then I am down to 25% of my original stuff after the 2nd time through-- assuming I am not acquiring lots of new stuff in the interim.



-gauss

 

[Bamaman]

As the years go along, we get more and more stuff. It doesn't help that my parents had two houses and we lost an aunt at 99 years old with no heirs except us. I ended up with equal to six single car garages full of "stuff."

My cars have never been in a garage, as there's no room.

My best friends are the guys running the heavy equipment at the local city landfill. They're glad to help me unload my truck on my weekly dump run. And I've been going there for years.

Our kids have no taste for the finer things like 77 pieces of sterling silver flat wear, 3 sets of fine china and 100 pieces of hand engraved crystal. No one seems interested in the grandfather clock I built or the fine furniture in the formal living and dining room.

And we're not doing three children any favor having so much stuff. But I didn't know I'd be spending the first 13 years in early retirement moving so much "stuff" over and over. I'm bad enough, but the two parents and aunt pushed me over the top.

In the meantime, I've only got a triple car garage to declutter. One garage is my cabinet shop, and it's going to stay, however. I can see things getting better on the horizon as a granddaughter has bought a house and we can certainly fix her up.

 

[W2R]

So DH and I, (mostly me) talk about moving to a home with a better floor plan so that we can age in place. Number 1 on the list is a 1st Floor Master, 2nd in importance is exterior grounds maintenance (mowing, landscaping maintenance and snow plowing) managed and provided by someone other than ourselves.
[...]
Anyone with similar stories or tips to share?

I moved into my "aging in place" home five years ago, when I was 67. It was only 3 miles away. I decided to sell after I moved, to make the moving easier, and to hire movers but do the packing myself.

I had been working out at the gym, and felt I was pretty strong for a woman my age. I thought I could still do as much as I could in my late fifties, and that wasn't true! Packing the boxes and navigating adeptly through a half packed house was more than I could easily handle, much to my surprise. I fell numerous times, hit myself on boxes and things, strained my back, got some bad bruises and sprains, was stung by wasps, and so much more.

If I had to do it over again, I'd take a suitcase or two and stay in an Extended Stay America or similar furnished place for a week or two. I'd tell the movers to pack everything for me and move it into my new home. Unpacking was much easier than packing and there's no rush.

As for the decluttering, even though I decluttered mercilessly, I still have stuff I don't want or need. I think it's nearly impossible to get rid of too much.

I have a good strong cart which I thought was very helpful in putting things away as I unpacked the boxes. I still use it a lot around the house, as a laundry cart or for anything else I need a cart for. I notice that it has more than doubled in price during the past five years which is insane. Perhaps you already have a good cart.

I did do some things before moving day that I thought were helpful. One was to get the utilities and internet working before i moved in. Also I went grocery shopping for staples such as canned goods, and filled the pantry. I put soap, shampoo, a towel, hairbrush, and toothbrush and toothpaste in the bathroom so I could clean up on moving day right after the move. I also put TP, sponges, and paper towels in the house before I moved in.

 

[skipro33]

We were able to purge all the 'stuff' when our house was destroyed in a California wildland fire. Sometimes blessings are in disguise. Insurance paid off quite well and we swore we'd never accumulate like that again. Now 14 years later, we take a room a month and if we have something we haven't used in two years, it goes in a shed. If it stays in the shed a year, it's gone. I will list on craigslis, facebook, local next-door-neighbor forum, or just set it on the curb with a FREE sign on it. Lastly to Hospice thrift store and the dump. Now, sometimes we have to repurchase stuff but what a joy to look for something and to actually be able to find it. Even our kitchen junk drawer is well orgainized!!

 

[Ronstar]

We sold our vacation condo so we had to do a forced purge. Took us a week. Most stuff went to Goodwill, some to garbage, furniture to consignment store. The few things left came home with us in the bed of my pickup.

We'll have to do something similar when we downsize from our house. Until then, we declutter on a minor scale. Stuff that we don't need to Goodwill, garage sales, and garbage. Just trying to keep volume of stuff at a minimum until we know that we are moving. Then the serious purge will take place. Until then, the key for is to keep outgoing volume > incoming volume.

 

[Golden sunsets]

If you look at "blue zones", where people live healthy long lives, one commonality seems to be they live on a hill, and walk to town and back. So when I see that people want "master down" I'm wondering if that's doing a disservice for yourself.

DH has Parkinsons and although doing well, is likely to have mobility issues down the road, thus the desire for a home with a first floor master.

 

[Golden sunsets]

You might want to watch one or two episodes of "Tidying Up" with Marie Kondo on netflix. You may find it helpful towards your efforts of deciding what goes and what to keep, as well as some strategies on how to tackle different rooms and categories of stuff.

Great idea. I have her original book on my kindle, so I should pull it up.

 

[Golden sunsets]

Some questions/comments that I discuss with myself as I go through this are:

1) Take digital photos of things that you would like to preserve memories of

2) Ask yourself how hard would it be to replace something if you decide you actually need it down the road -- and at what cost?

3) How bulky vs compact is the item of consideration?

4) Will a local charity accept it?

I also don't try to do everything at the same time. If I can reduce the amount of stuff by say 50% then I am winning. A year later I can repeat the process and then I am down to 25% of my original stuff after the 2nd time through-- assuming I am not acquiring lots of new stuff in the interim.



-gauss

Speaking of photos, we've been gathering our photos in one location. We also inherited all of my parents photos and DH's parents photos. It amazes me how big this stash is. It is bins and bins of albums, framed photos, and stacks and stacks of individual pics. I finally decided to remove the pics from the frames and dispose of the frames. But there are still so many. We still have many framed photo displays in several rooms.

Yes we have donated a lot to Goodwill.

 

[Golden sunsets]

I moved into my "aging in place" home five years ago, when I was 67. It was only 3 miles away. I decided to sell after I moved, to make the moving easier, and to hire movers but do the packing myself.

I had been working out at the gym, and felt I was pretty strong for a woman my age. I thought I could still do as much as I could in my late fifties, and that wasn't true! Packing the boxes and navigating adeptly through a half packed house was more than I could easily handle, much to my surprise. I fell numerous times, hit myself on boxes and things, strained my back, got some bad bruises and sprains, was stung by wasps, and so much more.

If I had to do it over again, I'd take a suitcase or two and stay in an Extended Stay America or similar furnished place for a week or two. I'd tell the movers to pack everything for me and move it into my new home. Unpacking was much easier than packing and there's no rush.

As for the decluttering, even though I decluttered mercilessly, I still have stuff I don't want or need. I think it's nearly impossible to get rid of too much.

I have a good strong cart which I thought was very helpful in putting things away as I unpacked the boxes. I still use it a lot around the house, as a laundry cart or for anything else I need a cart for. I notice that it has more than doubled in price during the past five years which is insane. Perhaps you already have a good cart.

I did do some things before moving day that I thought were helpful. One was to get the utilities and internet working before i moved in. Also I went grocery shopping for staples such as canned goods, and filled the pantry. I put soap, shampoo, a towel, hairbrush, and toothbrush and toothpaste in the bathroom so I could clean up on moving day right after the move. I also put TP, sponges, and paper towels in the house before I moved in.

Oh W2R, we will not pack ourselves. Just lugging all of these heavy construction grade black plastic bags to a central point for the dump man was more exertion than I was comfortable with.

Your suggestions on prepping the new home are great when the time comes I'll remember your advice.

 

[Golden sunsets]

We were able to purge all the 'stuff' when our house was destroyed in a California wildland fire. Sometimes blessings are in disguise. Insurance paid off quite well and we swore we'd never accumulate like that again. Now 14 years later, we take a room a month and if we have something we haven't used in two years, it goes in a shed. If it stays in the shed a year, it's gone. I will list on craigslis, facebook, local next-door-neighbor forum, or just set it on the curb with a FREE sign on it. Lastly to Hospice thrift store and the dump. Now, sometimes we have to repurchase stuff but what a joy to look for something and to actually be able to find it. Even our kitchen junk drawer is well orgainized!!

Oh that kitchen junk drawer..... We all have one don't we?

 

[Golden sunsets]

We sold our vacation condo so we had to do a forced purge. Took us a week. Most stuff went to Goodwill, some to garbage, furniture to consignment store. The few things left came home with us in the bed of my pickup.

We'll have to do something similar when we downsize from our house. Until then, we declutter on a minor scale. Stuff that we don't need to Goodwill, garage sales, and garbage. Just trying to keep volume of stuff at a minimum until we know that we are moving. Then the serious purge will take place. Until then, the key for is to keep outgoing volume > incoming volume.

Forced purge. I like that term. That is exactly what we are doing. And a lot of what remains, I question the wisdom of keeping.

 

[Scusan]

Several years ago, DGF and I decided to move in. We both had big houses and stuff to get rid of. As a single guy, I was spread out into a 3000 sq ft, 3 1/2 car garage house with a huge basement too. There wasn't really a reason to throw stuff out since I always had room for it.

One of the most helpful things to me as to be home on "garbage night". It enabled a kind of shift in mind-set.

I'd just take a black bag from room to room looking for things to throw out-- NOT where to keep stuff, how to better organize it, or getting sidetracked goofing off with possessions. I would tell myself I'd try to fill one bag, but once the inertia got going, I might wind up with a half dozen.

Good Luck!

 

[martyp]

I used to watch decluttering home show. First you set a goal (volume of space available). Then you divide your possessions into Yes, No, Maybe. Of the course the maybe pile is the hardest. Usually the advice is that if you haven't touched or seen it in the past year then it should go. If you do keep it then you should display it in your new home and make use of it. Digital recording of items can take care of all those old photos and movies but even those could use a bit of triage. Don't procrastinate.

I moved to Thailand a few years ago with 2 suitcases. I really don't miss any of my old stuff.

 

[Koolau]

We've been through the "declutter" thing a few times. Each time, we got rid of more. We always found ourselves asking the question "WHY did we keep this junk last move?" The older we got, the less stuff meant to us. When we moved 5000 miles, we moved in 2 suitcases each. Full disclosure, we kept our apartment on the mainland. Some of our "stuff" is still there and will go out in a dumpster when we die.

Age has relatively few advantages. One of the few is the realization that virtually ALL your stuff will end up in a dumpster when you die. Of course, YMMV.

 

[Golden sunsets]

Several years ago, DGF and I decided to move in. We both had big houses and stuff to get rid of. As a single guy, I was spread out into a 3000 sq ft, 3 1/2 car garage house with a huge basement too. There wasn't really a reason to throw stuff out since I always had room for it.

One of the most helpful things to me as to be home on "garbage night". It enabled a kind of shift in mind-set.

I'd just take a black bag from room to room looking for things to throw out-- NOT where to keep stuff, how to better organize it, or getting sidetracked goofing off with possessions. I would tell myself I'd try to fill one bag, but once the inertia got going, I might wind up with a half dozen.

Good Luck!

Oh yes the basement. That is where more than half of our purge has occurred. And now I'm looking at what is left in the basement and I am questioning why we are keeping the items that made the cut. The basement is very much like a giant kitchen junk drawer. There are things like an extensive tool collection neatly organized in a shop area. We will never use more than one of the 12 screw drivers, or wrenches, or fill in the blanks that reside on a carefully arranged pegboard wall storage system. But what do we do with 11 screw drivers, etc. I hate to throw them away.

And then there is what feels like an entire library of good books in numerous rooms. I suppose there must be a recipient somewhere willing to take the books that we won't be moving to a new home. Anyone want a perfect set of World Book encyclopedias?

 

[sengsational]

" Anyone want a perfect set of World Book encyclopedias?"


I don't know...how well do they burn?

 

[TrvlBug]

... ...
And then there is what feels like an entire library of good books in numerous rooms. I suppose there must be a recipient somewhere willing to take the books that we won't be moving to a new home. Anyone want a perfect set of World Book encyclopedias?

With the exception of the encyclopedias and academic books more than 5 years old, our local library took all of our books as they run a used book store (charity) as well as periodically run a charity book event. DH being a prolific reader as well as somewhat of a pack rat, we donated close to 30 boxes of paperbacks as well as a few boxes of hard backs to the library . And now DH uses the library and rarely buys books. He had no choice as I told him no more using the spare bedrooms as storage. If he wants storage, he can use the garage and park his car in the driveway.