How do you want to be remembered?

[Khan]

I've commissioned a friend to give a eulogy and told him who to invite (in person or online). I will pass more ideas to him as they occur to me.

 

[Purron]

Wherefore art thou Khan?

 

[David1961]

As a person who marched to the beat of my own drum and who was gentle and kind to people.

 

[comicbookgujy]

Personally, I don't care how anyone remember me because when I'm dead, I won't be able to hear or feel what they say about me.

 

[Major Tom]

I don't particularly mind how I am remembered, as it won't matter to me when I'm gone. However, if you were to ask how I think I will be remembered, the following phrase may well sum it up, "He was a bit weird, but he really loved his cats."

This is my latest foster. She is blind, and a complete sweetie. I am fascinated with how little she asks from the world, and yet how content she seems.

 

[Gumby]

I just want people to say: "Who? Never heard of him."

 

[ohyes]

Major Tom, That is a very regal-looking cat. Glad you found each other.

When reading obits that mention the deceased lighting up the room, never meeting a stranger, being unforgettable, etc., I pledge to be nicer because there is no way anybody in my family would think to include any of those things about me.

So far those promises to myself have not panned out. My obit writer will most likely resort to fibs and exaggerations to make me sound good, but i guess that is okay.

 

[omni550]

My obit writer will most likely resort to fibs and exaggerations to make me sound good, but i guess that is okay.

And what makes you think the other obits aren't [part] fiction, as well?

omni

 

[Lcountz]

OMNI550...you are right on....

Who ever read an obit that said "He/She was a nasty, unforgiving, selfish p***k who never had/did a good thing, ever, who treated family like dirt and had no friends?"

I was just looking at this mornings list in my local paper.....everyone was SO GOOD and Nice and was just the BEST family person ever!!!!!!!

 

[Tyro]

I was just looking at this mornings list in my local paper.....everyone was SO GOOD and Nice and was just the BEST family person ever!!!!!!!

Obits, and funerals for that matter, aren't for the benefit of the dead -- they're for the benefit/comfort of the living (survivors).

Since the best part of departing is the wake, I figure I'll go the cheapest way I can (I think that's still cremation -- please correct me if I'm wrong) and save the $$$ instead for the party for friends & family.

Tyro

 

[Major Tom]

OMNI550...you are right on....

Who ever read an obit that said "He/She was a nasty, unforgiving, selfish p***k who never had/did a good thing, ever, who treated family like dirt and had no friends?"

I was just looking at this mornings list in my local paper.....everyone was SO GOOD and Nice and was just the BEST family person ever!!!!!!!

Couldn't agree more!

It would be refreshing if we were to have more realistic obits and eulogies, methinks. Even the prickliest curmudgeon has a good side (or did at some point in the past). We are all complex and multi-faceted personalities, and obits that paint us all as the best person ever, don't do us justice, IMO.

 

[imoldernu]

“Read your own obituary notice; they say you live longer. Gives you second wind. New lease of life.”
― James Joyce, Ulysses

 

[Tyro]

Even the prickliest curmudgeon has a good side (or did at some point in the past).

Maybe the reason eulogies are that way is to remind folks that the SOB did -- at least at one/some time -- have some redeeming qualities?

 

[haha]

Those of us who have children will be remembered as long as they live, and if we get to know grandchildren well, a while longer. I remember very well my great grandparents from one side, but not my Mother's side as they were dead before I got to grade school or whenever it is that we tend to remember lot of things. I'll remember my aunts and uncles as long as I remember anything, but it is unlikely that my kids will remember them, or even their own aunts and uncles because we never lived where they were a frequent part of our lives. I will never forget parents, grandparents, or great grandparents that I got to know during my life. And of course cousins, and close childhood friends.

I'm sure many people will remember Doctors Sabin and Salk, as they made such a huge difference in the life of a kid coming up mid-century. Who would soon forget Dr. Schweitzer or Helen Keller, or General Eisenhower, or Joseph Stalin or Hitler?

Most us will remember our parents and other close relatives, the public people who made a big difference in our lives and were newsworthy, and of course actors of whom our memories are continually reinforced. I never saw Fred Astaire or Ginger Rogers during their careers, but thanks to late night TV I would be very unlikely to forget them.

If we have surviving mates, whether they are really into us or would just as soon seen our backs going out the door, they will remember us likely as long as they live. I don't know what the half life of dating memories is, but some I will likely never forget. But first kiss, first that, first the other, long gone from my memories.

So for us non-famous people, your kids and their offspring will be your memory bank. Be nice to them. If you are single or without children, never forget anyone's birthday.

Ha

 

[Bestwifeever]

Couldn't agree more!

It would be refreshing if we were to have more realistic obits and eulogies, methinks. Even the prickliest curmudgeon has a good side (or did at some point in the past)....

Not to mention the obit can call attention to the curmudgeon's beautiful lawn as no children were allowed on it.

 

[Badger]

A few days ago I was in a large gathering of people and was approached by a lady who was all excited and said, "You were my Anatomy teacher back in the 70s. You were the best teacher I ever had." She then called her husband over to meet me. She started telling him some of the work she had done in my class and how interesting it had been. I could remember everything like it was just last week and could even picture her 40 years earlier. What was really nice was to find that she continued on to earn her PhD in Anatomy. How nice it was to be remembered and know I had been a positive influence in someones life.
Similar chance meetings like this with former students have happened through the years so I already know how I am to be remembered.
I've been fortunate all these years to have a career that I enjoyed and that gave me the opportunity to help others get their start. So the difficult part for me has been coming to the realization that it was just time for me to go.

Cheers!

 

[Khan]

Wherefore art thou Khan?

Still in Ohio.