help me chill out

[Fermion]

Have a serious or semi-serious medical issue, like I had. It will cure you quickly of the "stash it away" mentality. Seriously, enjoy your life, way too short. BTW, I spent my extra money on a custom bike, lost 45 lbs, and rode over 3500 miles this year.


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Finally someone gets it. Life is short.

 

[RenoJay]

Thanks for all the excellent suggestions!


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[Katiek]

You say you can ER, so I assume you don't need this money for basics even if you quit your job or weren't able to work at it for some reason.

I'm not ER yet, but when I get a gift I try to save some of it, use some of it to support a worthy cause and spend some of it on a little treat that I might not otherwise get. I liked Old Woman's post, try to think what the donor would enjoy? As long as you're financially on track, they'd probably enjoy knowing that you used the money to create some special memories doing whatever you enjoy - a trip, a nice restaurant, a family reunion, exotic coffees etc.

 

[ArkTinkerer]

Ironically Senator all my life I wanted to treat myself to a pair of Christian Loubatins shoes, I call them "stripper" shoes because they have 4-5 inch heels and are very expensive.


I finally brought a pair. now I have to work up the nerve to wear them to church.

Buy a portable pole and wear them to the nearest VA hospital to cheer some boys up! Fun and charity work all in one!

 

[Rickt]

+1.

Or spend a half day at your local children's hospital volunteering and your heart and purse strings will open right up to those in need.

+1

 

[W2R]

I am not as selfless as the previous posters. I do admire their charitable inclinations, though. Maybe some day...

I suppose you could try browsing on Amazon but there really is a limit to how much one can spend there. My opinion is that to spend that much extra money, you need to be looking at Big Stuff, not just little stuff.
($20,000/year) x 10 years = $200K, and that is a lot of money.

Why not put that money towards a Dream House or a boat or RV or traveling around the world, depending on what is appealing to you? That is what I would suggest.

I would tend to [-]squirrel it away[/-] put it aside for now until I figured out something that would truly knock my socks off.

 

[healthyandfun]

Consider giving a small portion to a school. As a former educator, classroom supplies and books are always needed and funds for those items are never adequate. There are sites like Donors Choose where one can select the project to be funded from a long list of requests. A local school has a benefactor who purchases backpacks stuffed with supplies for needy students and books for summer reading for the entire school. It is delightful to see the smiles on their faces. The impact is enormous!

 

[Fermion]

Set up a scholarship fund that awards tuition assistance to teens who can refrain from using the word 'like' in a conversation for more than a week. This way you can feel good about yourself and you will still have the $20k available to spend elsewhere.

 

[sengsational]

This article may help - you can use science to help you spend the money wisely:

Can Money Buy Happiness? - Scientific American

From the article:

The researchers argue that because wealth allows people to experience the best that life has to offer, it ultimately undermines their ability to savor life’s little pleasures.

..having money raises our aspirations about the happiness that we expect in our daily lives, and these raised aspirations can be toxic. They say you can never go back to holding hands...

he conclusion is that if we want to buy happiness, we need to wring as many rewarding and stretching experiences from our purchases as possible. The most effective empirically-supported ways include:

* spending our money on activities that help us grow as a person (taking guitar lessons, investing in an entrepreneurial venture), strengthen our connections with others (dinners with colleagues, car trips with friends, roller blades for mom and child), and contribute to our communities (catering a fundraiser, donating to the needy);
* shelling it out on activities and experiences (e.g., rock climbing expeditions, wine tasting family reunions) rather than material possessions;
* spending it on many small pleasures (e.g., regular massages, weekly delivery of fresh flowers, or frequent phone calls to our best friend in Europe) rather than on one big-ticket item (like a new car or flat-screen TV); and
* splurging on something that we work extremely hard to get and have to wait for (whether it’s a concert, trip, or gadget) and relish the feeling of hard-won accomplishment and anticipation as we wait.

For more on that consider this paper: http://scholar.harvard.edu/files/danielgilbert/files/if-money-doesnt-make-you-happy.nov-12-20101.pdf

The relationship between money and happiness is surprisingly weak, which may stem in part from the way people spend it. Drawing on empirical research, we propose eight principles designed to help consumers get more happiness for their money. Specifically, we suggest that consumers should (1) buy more experiences and fewer material goods; (2) use their money to benefit others rather than themselves; (3) buy many small pleasures rather than fewer large ones; (4) eschew extended warranties and other forms of overpriced insurance; (5) delay consumption; (6) consider how peripheral features of their purchases may affect their day-to-day lives; (7) beware of comparison shopping; and (8) pay close attention to the happiness of others.

 

[RenoJay]

Set up a scholarship fund that awards tuition assistance to teens who can refrain from using the word 'like' in a conversation for more than a week. This way you can feel good about yourself and you will still have the $20k available to spend elsewhere.

I love it!


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[robnplunder]

I see it as an opportunity to splurge a little. In the last few years, I "splurged" a bit b/c I anticipate that in ER, I would not be able to spend as freely. I've bought some toys, and had a few trips. It was liberating after living so many years way below our means. We still saved a bunch in prep for ER but enjoyed the added fun with splurging.

You only live once.

 

[RobLJ]

Dream travel and high end fly fishing/camping equipment--and charity of your choice--but that's just me.

 

[SkisALot]

If I've learned anything at all - which on most days is doubtful- it's that you can't force anything and be happy with the outcome. You'll spend if and when you're ready.
A strange thing happened to me while I was waiting to be ready. I discovered that I was happy with what I have. I can't think of anything material that I want.

 

[kaudrey]

It would become my travel budget. I have a list a mile long of places I want to go/things I want to do/see. I don't know what you like to do, but you can come up with your own list. Mine includes things such as hiking Kilimanjaro, safari in Botswana, Siem Reap in Cambodia, wine tasting in France and Mendoza, Argentina, hot springs in Iceland.....the world is endless!

 

[2017ish]

It would become my travel budget. I have a list a mile long of places I want to go/things I want to do/see. I don't know what you like to do, but you can come up with your own list. Mine includes things such as hiking Kilimanjaro, safari in Botswana, Siem Reap in Cambodia, wine tasting in France and Mendoza, Argentina, hot springs in Iceland.....the world is endless!

Whew--if it weren't for your location, I'd have thought you were my wife posting!

 

[kimcdougc]

Some for your dreams, some for a charity of your choosing, some for a rainy day.