Separate Assets

[jcretire77]

In my situation my wife (57) and I (55) have been married just about three years. We have kept our assets separate. We have closely the same amount of total assets. Myself 1.6 and my wife 1.3 + .35 paid off condo.

We both pay our own bills and split larger purchases such as a car.

Being very close to retirement I am curious how any of this fine bunch handle a situation such as this. Is there a better method then the 50/50 bill paying?

 

[RunningBum]

You could have a joint account that you fund equally, or however you decide, and pay all of your common bills from that.

 

[H2ODude]

For 45 years we've shared it all. Of course, we started out together with nuttin' and while I was the primary earner never had a reason to segregate other than to each have our own tIRA and Roth.

 

[2017ish]

Not in that situation, as we are like H20Dude, married when we had negative net worth many years ago.

But, in your situation, 50/50 seems to make sense, particularly if kids are present from prior relationships. Maybe it would help to have the jointly funded account for ease of administration?

 

[Jay_Gatsby]

We've always kept thing separate - both single and married. The only combined accounts are the joint checking, the kids 529s and a credit card for joint expenses (yay Thank You points!)

 

[Peter]

Separate assets, with a joint account for food, entertainment, vacations, etc. We each transfer money into the joint at the start of the month.

This is the second marriage for both of us. I think it's different when you marry young and have no significant financial assets. That's how my late first wife and I arranged things.

 

[travelover]

Similar situation here - we split joint costs like food, utilities, etc. 50/50, buy our own cars and other personal items like clothes.

Did the share and share alike thing in my first marriage when we started with essentially nothing.

 

[sunnysideup]

Second marriage for both of us, so DH and I have a joint account which we have funded proportionately to our income while working and with only a few months until retirement, we intend to continue. It has worked for over 10 years and we don't see a reason to change things...

That being said, I think everyone should do whatever works for them.

 

[BBQ-Nut]

Separate accounts here with a 50/50 split of expenses. Discretionary 'mad money' is up to each of us as long as the bills are paid.


I do get slightly annoyed when there is yet another box from someplace that DW has ordered from for something we already have or don't need.


But - you know the saying....

 

[Philliefan33]

Joint accounts and ownership of everything, except of course the individual TSP/401K / IRAs. We funded the retirement accounts as a team with our pool of money. We've been married over 25 years. DH came into the marriage with more than me but graciously considered everything "ours" right from the beginning.

It works for us.

 

[Independent]

For 45 years we've shared it all. Of course, we started out together with nuttin' and while I was the primary earner never had a reason to segregate other than to each have our own tIRA and Roth.

This describes us, right down to the 45 (we were married in June 1970).

I can see that people who come into second marriages with significant assets and prior children may want to keep them separate.

I can see that people who had ugly divorces and are somewhat gun-shy would keep them separate.

 

[W2R]

We're quite the opposite. We were both married before for many years, being a widower and a divorcee. To us, everything seems so much simpler if we just live apart, don't mix our money, and don't marry. No reason the church or state has to get involved.

Our emotional commitment to one another couldn't be deeper. We enjoy plenty of time together every day. Life is good.

 

[walkinwood]

Isn't all money earned after marriage joint property?

Even then, it makes sense to keep your pre-marriage accounts separate & fund a joint account. If you're worried about possible scenarios, it would be wise to jointly see a lawyer/CPA.

We didn't do that, but most of our money has been earned after we got married. And we're getting along pretty well.

 

[Ronstar]

We have an arrangement similar to op. Real estate is joint, but all accounts are separate. Separate ira's. She pays some bills. I pay the rest. We're both retired. She has a pension. I'm living off my savings. We are both on her retirement insurance. We keep each other informed of our finances. Works very well for us.


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[freebird5825]

Unmarried but living with Mr B. All of our assets are completely separate. He has grown children, I have none. It would make absolutely no sense to co-mingle assets from the point of view of inheritance.

I added him as an authorized user on my cashback credit card since he does all the shopping for the household, fills the gas tanks and gets the oil changes and car repairs done. I am so glad to be relieved of all that running around.

When we both had to replace our vehicles, we went 50-50 on the cost of both cars. He picked out both. Each car is registered in only one name.

All household expenses are split 50-50. Personal types of purchases (clothing, my gardening stuff, his accounting business stuff) are paid by the person who bought the item.
I always chip in on gifts and treats for his Mom. Gifts to his kids, well, I usually let him cover those, since I have no kids.

I own the house we live in, so I do not ask him to contribute to maintenance or repairs or taxes. He handles all of the business calls for me as my agent. He is so much better at that.

This system w*rks very well for us.

 

[JPatrick]

We have most retirement cash in separate accounts.
Part of the reason is for tax purposes.
Example......About a billion years ago my Mother bought a lot of stock and mutual funds. She held it jointly with me (only kid) so it would pass without question when she died. So I inherited it some 16 years ago. When I was told about the tax basis of the holdings(it was unknown, but it was clear enough that a tax nightmare was ahead,) I decided I would probably never sell any part of it. It has grown into an even larger mess since then.. Given the fact that it is only in my name, when someone else inherits the portfolio they will have a reset basis and the ability to sell it minus the tax.

 

[Animorph]

We combined all income, budgeted for common expenses and retirement (whatever makes sense to you), and split the rest 50/50 into individual accounts. We used individual money to purchase cars, allowing maximum individual choice. We reimbursed for mileage from the common budget so choosing which car to take was roughly neutral. Over the years different items have been swapped from individual to common or vice versa as family choices affected our economics.

 

[Gill]

Isn't all money earned after marriage joint property?

Absolutely not. Where did that idea come from?
Bruce

 

[calmloki]

Coming up on 37 years of unmarried bliss. We share to our best mutual advantage. She has an ex but sharing works to her advantage with me - didn't with him.

 

[Gill]

Example......About a billion years ago my Mother bought a lot of stock and mutual funds. She held it jointly with me (only kid) so it would pass without question when she died. So I inherited it some 16 years ago. When I was told about the tax basis of the holdings(it was unknown, but it was clear enough that a tax nightmare was ahead,) I decided I would probably never sell any part of it. It has grown into an even larger mess since then.. Given the fact that it is only in my name, when someone else inherits the portfolio they will have a reset basis and the ability to sell it minus the tax.

In your example the basis of the portfolio should have been stepped up on your mother's death based on date of death values. You could easily go back and get those prices and manage your portfolio properly.
Bruce

 

[stepford]

I've heard it said that couples' financial arrangements can be broken down into "1 account", "2 accounts" or "3 accounts". Traditional marrieds who pool everything in common are the first sorts while folks keeping everything separate are the second.

D"W" and I have been happily unmarried for over 20 years and have lived for most of that time in a house I bought before we met. For us 3 accounts makes the most sense. She has her assets and I mine, but we have a joint account that we fund equally every month. This account pays for our living expenses and recurring costs like insurance. When a big expense like a vacation is coming up we'll both dump extra cash into the shared account.

 

[walkinwood]

Absolutely not. Where did that idea come from?
Bruce

I searched for it and found that it is indeed the case in some western states. Having said that, I'm no expert.
Community property - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[JPatrick]

In your example the basis of the portfolio should have been stepped up on your mother's death based on date of death values. You could easily go back and get those prices and manage your portfolio properly.
Bruce

Getting those values considering all the splits, mergers, etc, would likely be impossible, or totally impractical. We can withdraw any fresh divies and or cap gains if needed, but selling the holdings would be a nightmare.
No need for the money, and any managing/rebalancing needing to be done can be handled using the generated income.
Assuming I die first, DW will get the whole stash with a stepped up basis.
Happy everything.

 

[Sunset]

We have an arrangement similar to op. Real estate is joint, but all accounts are separate. Separate ira's. She pays some bills. I pay the rest. We're both retired. She has a pension. I'm living off my savings. We are both on her retirement insurance. We keep each other informed of our finances. Works very well for us.
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Ditto to a T

 

[Hermit]

The late DW and I were married for 30 years. She didn't have two nickels to rub together when we were married. I was a little better off and always the larger financial contributor with her contributing a large amount after the kids were in high school. Everything was in both our names. Our credit cards had the same number and we both wrote checks out of the same checking accounts. At one point she wanted her own account to use as she saw fit and we set her up an account. She never used it.

If I were to remarry, the 50-50 funding of common expenses and everything else separate seems like the best approach because of kids and prior charitable commitments.