For max enjoyment, keep habits in check

[Focus]

This article is a couple of months old, but I don't think we discussed it here:

Don't Do The Things You Love (New York Times Opinion page)

Some of the insights are relevant to those who retire early:

“The bottom line is that, if you really enjoy something, you don’t want to repeat it in a routine way so that it becomes a habit. You lose the pleasure in the experience. Instead, you want to make habitual the necessities in life … that is, regular exercise, a healthy diet, saving money and paying the bills, and working. The pleasures in life should be savored and not performed in a habitual way … including time with family, a great glass of wine, and the sunset over the ocean.”

 

[CoolChange]

Staying Present

My initial reaction to this was not good since I have purposely been trying to make more of the things I really enjoy habitual over the last few months, kind of preparation for ER.

For example, I realized a while back that one of my favorite things to do on vacation was take a long walk alone on a beach, in the jungle, etc. So, I started trying to take a walk (occasionally go for a run) in the woods behind my house, almost every day. So far, I cannot say I have noticed any reduction in my enjoyment of this. These passages may explain why:

How often is too often do something you like? Ms. Wood says it varies based on how complex the experience is — a very complicated piece of music might stand up better to repeat listens than a simpler song — and on “your own ability to stay present when you perform the behavior.”

Another way to keep yourself from getting inured to an experience, she said, is just “to insert some change” into it.

No two days in the woods are exactly the same; and, I definitely make an effort to stay present during this activity, not let my mind wander to issues at the office, family, etc.

I think this idea staying present is key to Zen and likely other meditation teachings which I probably should have paid more attention to long ago.

 

[audreyh1]

What is this wierd (sort of) moralizing crap?

There is a good reason I don't read articles that offer lifestyle "advice". Piles of trite advice from people who know little, yet seek to make money writing about it.

Lots of lifestyle gurus out there. I think the quality of my life improved considerably when I started ignoring them.

 

[heeyy_joe]

"Not tonight honey, it might become a habit".

 

[Lucantes]

What is this wierd (sort of) moralizing crap?
There is a good reason I don't read articles that offer lifestyle "advice". Piles of trite advice from people who know little, yet seek to make money writeups no about it.
Lots of lifestyle gurus out there. I think the quality of my life improved considerably when I started ignoring them.

+1

 

[Major Tom]

I like my habits and my routine. Excitement is over-rated

 

[scrabbler1]

I remember learning this concept in Economics 101. It was called "decreasing marginal utility" or MU. But not everyone has the same decreasing MU curve. For most of what I do, before or after I ERed, my MU curve was basically flat. One way to keep that MU curve from decreasing is to get better at something over time, which in ER has happened.


Also, being an outlier my whole life has shielded me from being affected by any nonsense this author could write.

 

[audreyh1]

I remember learning this concept in Economics 101. It was called "decreasing marginal utility" or MU. But not everyone has the same decreasing MU curve. For most of what I do, before or after I ERed, my MU curve was basically flat. One way to keep that MU curve from decreasing is to get better at something over time, which in ER has happened.


Also, being an outlier my whole life has shielded me from being affected by any nonsense this author could write.

That's a really good point, getting better at things during retirement. We have certainly honed our skills in a bunch of areas and still get better.

Yeah - the outlier bit too!

 

[48Fire]

I liked the article, and I agree with it. Too much golf and I get burned out and develop chronic injuries. Not golfing as much allows me to develop other interests and hobbies, such as fishing, which my wife is teaching me

 

[zinger1457]

I liked the article, and I agree with it. Too much golf and I get burned out and develop chronic injuries. Not golfing as much allows me to develop other interests and hobbies, such as fishing, which my wife is teaching me

Same here, before retirement I figured playing golf 6 days a week would be heaven. Upon retirement I joined a private club and quickly lost the desire to play everyday, also got tired of playing the same course most of the time. Eventually gave up my membership, play different courses 3X a week, now everything is good. Same with exercising (hiking, jogging, weights), need to change my routine frequently to keep the interest up.

 

[seraphim]

I figure if I keep doing something I enjoy, and burn out on it, then I'll find something else I'll enjoy. Then one day I'll go back to the first activity.


Sent from my iPad using Early Retirement Forum

 

[seraphim]

Couldn't read the article as it asked me to log in...


Sent from my iPad using Early Retirement Forum

 

[Sunset]

That's why I don't read this site everyday, wouldn't want to enjoy everyone less

 

[Huston55]

"Not tonight honey, it might become a habit".

Based on the advice here, you can fix that by:

- Staying present in the activity
- Trying to get better at it
- Introducing change
- Playing a different course 3 times per week

You might want to hold off on that last one until you know the other techniques don't work.

 

[Totoro]

I think the quality of my life improved considerably when I started ignoring them.

This one wierd trick drastically improves your quality of life!