NYT article on ER

[jjquantz]

I have no regrets...but then again, I don't sing or write songs.

It's too hard to make money in music these days. Other than a few lucky people in my city, most musicians have to give lessons or take on other work to pay the bills. I'm happily retired and get to play music 100% on my own terms, and I wouldn't want it any other way.

I guess regrets might not be exactly what I'm thinking of. In the classical music world every program has brief bios of the performers. Everyone else on stage has something like, "Graduated from So and So Conservatory and studied with Big Name Flutist. Has toured with Fancy Orchestra." It just is a little awkward to lead with "Taught High School physics. Self taught on the flute."

Actually I've projected a little better image than that, but I am still just a little self-consciousness about my lack of formal training. Unfortunately, the classical music world has a strong "where did you study/who do you know/who have you played with" strain that is probably the biggest obstacle to overcome in finding performance opportunities. But, once one gets a few gigs, you can start to get others. It's the first few that are tough.

 

[audreyh1]

I went on a retirement seminar a couple years before retiring. They had the usual speakers going over the pension plan, health/aging, CPP, etc. Then they had the "life coach" speaker who asked "How many of you think you'll take up a hobby when you retire?"

Out of about 100 people, half of them raised their hands. Her response, "If you're this close to retirement and don't already have a hobby, you won't start one when you retire. All retirement gives you is more time to do the things you like, and if you like something you would already be doing it."

I disagree. The longer I worked, the less time and energy I had to spend on hobbies.

Once I retired, I actually developed several new ones. I spent a lot more time on some things I hadn't envisioned doing before I retired, but I enjoyed them very much.

It takes time and energy to explore options for things to do. When you are working, so much time is just spent dealing with everyday living chores outside of work that you have little time left to experiment and develop interests. We didn't have children. I can't imagine how working parents have time to develop other interests unless they have strict 40 hour weeks and no business travel.

 

[audreyh1]

Others on this site have said that their need to travel diminished once retired as that was their stress reliever, and I can understand that way of thinking. But, how many people have actually taken up a hobby that they didn't already do once they retired? I don't think that many have...

I did - several.

 

[audreyh1]

That hasn't been my experience. I discovered shortly after RE that some of my previous longstanding hobbies were there only to help me de-stress from work. Once work and the related stress were behind me, my interest in those hobbies dissipated. For me, retirement pretty much cleaned the slate.

Yep - exactly. I ended up doing completely different things than I expected.

It turned out that the first six months were mostly about experimentation. I'm really glad I gave myself permission to do that, even though it was more stumbling into the process than anything. After six months it became really clear to me that certain things were much more exciting that others and pulled me in a couple of very unexpected directions. Priorities changed completely. And I let go of a lot of old expectations and assumptions and let go of a lot of prior activities to make way for the new stuff.

 

[Linney]

I disagree. The longer I worked, the less time and energy I had to spend on hobbies. Once I retired, I actually developed several new ones. I spent a lot more time on some things I hadn't envisioned doing before I retired, but I enjoyed them very much. It takes time and energy to explore options for things to do. When you are working, so much time is just spent dealing with everyday living chores outside of work that you have little time left to experiment and develop interests.

and . . . .

Yep - exactly. I ended up doing completely different things than I expected

Hi Audrey, would you mind sharing some examples of what you found? I'm on OMY and could use some encouragement!! While working I find it very hard to explore new areas of interest due to limited free time. I am very capable of entertaining myself when I do manage to get time off of work so I am hopeful this will translate into a rich and fulfilling retirement, full of time to engage in new hobbies and interests.

--Linney

 

[daylatedollarshort]

I disagree. The longer I worked, the less time and energy I had to spend on hobbies.

Once I retired, I actually developed several new ones. I spent a lot more time on some things I hadn't envisioned doing before I retired, but I enjoyed them very much.

It takes time and energy to explore options for things to do. When you are working, so much time is just spent dealing with everyday living chores outside of work that you have little time left to experiment and develop interests. We didn't have children. I can't imagine how working parents have time to develop other interests unless they have strict 40 hour weeks and no business travel.

I agree with all this. We did have kids and there was just very little free time to be had between us between work, overtime, commuting, housework, errands and kids in sports, clubs and school activities. We have a lot more time for clubs and hobbies now. For me it was always a time issue, not a lack of interest in developing new hobbies.

 

[imoldernu]

It's interesting how things change with time.

Does anybody remember how all the modern mechanization of work was supposed to give us the 32 hour work week, with a three day weekend every week, and all for the same pay?

Oh YES!
Dad was a loomfixer in a textile mill, worked the night shift, and probably 60 to hours/week. Around the year 1942, he took me to the mill, to show me an eighteen foot lace loom, that had been brought over to RI, from England. It had a belt driven pulley that drove a rope loop, with knots, that connected to different parts of the loom, to trigger mechanical changes that previously required two persons to attend while the loom was operating.

Like it was yesterday, I can hear him say: "Bobby, in a few years this will change our life... We'll all be able to get the same work done, but I'll only have to work 30 hours a week, and I'll be able to spend all my extra time, with you".

Don't ever remember the word "robotics", or "technology", or "advances". Just that it would free up our lives for the important things.

 

[Danmar]

I took up downhill skiing and biking (both road and mountain) when I retired. Hadn't done any of that prior to retirement.

 

[Music Lover]

Well, I stand corrected

It seems that plenty of people took up hobbies once they retired.

 

[scrabbler1]

I disagree. The longer I worked, the less time and energy I had to spend on hobbies.

Once I retired, I actually developed several new ones. I spent a lot more time on some things I hadn't envisioned doing before I retired, but I enjoyed them very much.

It takes time and energy to explore options for things to do. When you are working, so much time is just spent dealing with everyday living chores outside of work that you have little time left to experiment and develop interests. We didn't have children. I can't imagine how working parents have time to develop other interests unless they have strict 40 hour weeks and no business travel.

I agree, Audrey. When I first switched from working full-time to part-time back in 2001, I already had two things lined up I wanted to do but couldn't when I was working FT. For one activity (volunteer work), I had saved its application form I received 6 months earlier, then applied in the first month of my PT work era. The other required no application. I did some quick research in the first few weeks to find out which nights I could rejoin this activity I had not done in 13 years. I still do both things today. When I ERed in 2008, I was able to expand one activity wile the other one became easier to schedule.

 

[martyp]

I ER'd 6 years ago at 55. On my first day I changed my Linked In account to "retired mechanical engineer". I then spent the first year documenting in Facebook how to do retirement right. I have never hesitated to tell people I am retired. I've been fortunate. No one have ever reacted negatively to my ER.

When I ER'd my pace of life slowed a little. I went through a short bucket list during the first 6 months. Since then I've structured my life with some volunteer activities and travel.

No regrets for my decision to ER.

 

[timo2]

A little bit of this for me, as well. DW and I were cruising along saving lotws of money from our combined salaries when the little non-profit I worked for decided to take a turn in a different direction. I was managing three grants that expired simultaneously the year I turned 55 and didn't really want to go in the direction the organization was headed. So DW and I ran the numbers for "maintain the current standard of living" given different work history's effect on SS, pension accrual rate, etc., and it came down to the following 3 scenarios:

A) I retire at 55 and DW at 62, or
B) DW and I both retire at 60, or
C) DW retires at 55 and I retire at 67.

Given the opportunity I had at 55, DW graciously said that I didn't need to continue.

When I was 60 I came up with a similar set of choices. My original intent was for me to ER and DW to work until she was 60, (she is 5 yrs younger). That was squished (the old 'you're not retiring before me'), and DW er'd at 57, leaving be to continue working until next year, class of 2017. DW is a great cook, so I did benefit from this arrangement anyway!

But the point is that one needs to come up with the alternative plans early enough to be able to have an appropriate advance discussion with one's spouse.

 

[Walt34]

I still have the same hobbies but the focus has changed. Before ER I was active in radio control (R/C) airplanes and in the club. That slowed a bit when I developed an interest in computers since that took a lot of time too. But I had planned to be active in R/C and in retirement it just didn't happen. It went totally stagnant for a good 10-12 years. Only recently have I resurrected that interest, but in a different aspect of the hobby, foam pre-built airplanes small enough to fly in the back yard. I used to spend months building an airplane with a wing span of six feet or more. Now I have zero interest in that.

Another hobby is photography. Although I had an interest in it for a long time I just didn't have the money for film and processing to get good at it. (This was long before digital.) Although I later learned that building a home darkroom isn't that hard, I thought it was so to me that was an insurmountable hurdle. And I had no idea of where or how to learn, I just knew that my photographs never looked like the ones in magazines. At the time I worked rotating shift work so taking classes wasn't an option even if I'd found one.

It wasn't until we bought our first digital camera and took an adult ed photography class that I learned that Photoshop Elements even existed, and I took off with that. And at the time I had a security job that allowed me to spend about half the time reading and I read photography books. And of course with digital, once you've paid for gear experimentation is free (unless you're printing too).

 

[candrew]

“I used to be kind of a big deal, and now I’m not,” Mr. Helmuth said.

Quite a few of us (me included) learn at some point in time that when it comes to w*rk, we're not as a big a deal as we may have thought. I learned that simple truth while still empl*yed. Others learn it afterwards. None of us are indispensable. What Mr. Helmuth may be experiencing is that he's not so much of a "big deal" as the fact that for him, w*rk is a big deal.

 

[O2Bfree]

It's interesting how things change with time.

Does anybody remember how all the modern mechanization of work was supposed to give us the 32 hour work week, with a three day weekend every week, and all for the same pay?

Yes! I remember an old black-and-white movie about the promise of the industrial revolution. It showed the inside of a futuristic factory, where workers lounged much of the day on the grassy banks of a stream that ran right through the middle of the building.

What happened? Could the promise have been broken by...GREED

 

[firewhen]

I love this comment

Reminds me of how I once commented on a similar thing. I said, "Just like they say youth is wasted on the young, I say retirement is wasted on the old!"

It is so true, why wait until you are physically worn down and used up by your occupation before you get me time. I will remember this saying.

 

[mickeyd]

I am currently managing the wealth of a Texas family. Sorry, I can't discuss any particulars at this time.

 

[NameRedacted]

I can well relate to this discussion. I'm handing my notice in tomorrow. I'll post back in a different thread how that goes.

Over the last few weeks I've been letting friends and family know my plans. The reactions have ranged from disinterest to the usual comments/questions "You're too young to retire" and "What are you going to do all day", to the incredulous and downright hostile. One friend of the family tried to insist that there was no way I could afford it even though she has no idea as to our financial situation. The worst reaction was from my gf's idiot brother, who after trying to convince me what a huge mistake it would be then tried to get me to call his Financial Advisor. (Whenever the topic of finance or investing comes up - he says he doesn't worry about that and let's his FA handle it all - I dread to think how much he is being taken for.)

The story there is that he actually failed at early retirement. He took a voluntary buy-out from his company. Apart from the fact that the amount he got was nowhere near enough to retire on, he also went out and bought a big expensive car. Now he works as a security guard and hates his job.

I think part of the problem is that we've always lived below our means, and some people think this is a sign of financial difficulty. At least that's my interpretation of the looks of pity or derision when we go out to dinner and pull out a BOGO coupon.

I've never understood people who would rather have no money and appear to be wealthy that the other way around. It's like they're more concerned with appearances than reality. Or maybe they just have poor impulse control. If someone offers you a piece of cake you don't have to eat it immediately. You can take it home and eat it later.

Anyway, wish me luck for tomorrow guys.

 

[candrew]

"You're too young to retire"

DW retired from her public school teaching career last May and her principal said the same thing, "you're too young to retire".

DW's reply: "That's why I'm doing it now!"

 

[Teacher Terry]

We always use coupons if we can when eating out. My friends call me the Coupon Queen. I don't see a thing wrong with that. REstaurant.com is a great place to look for deals. Also many restaurants now have dining clubs and after so many visits or spend so much $ you get free meal.

 

[unclemick]

I ER'd an unplanned 13 years before my target date, no longer have the same hobbies, don't live in the original spot picked for ER, and have a wife when I turned 70.

Plus this year may take the big leap - and root for the Chief's instead of the Saint's. Both teams know about spending long periods in the wilderness.



heh heh heh - And I ever wanted was to watch grass grow and paint dry.

 

[Meadbh]

Well, I stand corrected

It seems that plenty of people took up hobbies once they retired.

I took up golf. And taught myself how to be a gourmet cook.

 

[Focus]

From another thread:

http://www.early-retirement.org/forums/f29/study-leisure-in-retirement-84762.html

72% want to try new leisure activities
compared to doing things they’ve already done.

 

[laurence]

Interesting, DW and I have been open about wanting to both be retired by 55, and no one has had a negative reaction at that - that seems universally the best case scenario for "normal" retirement in our circles.

I have kept hidden from large swaths of family/friends that I have gone down to 24 hours a week, however. I feel like the stigma of retiring/semi-retiring is much greater in your 40's, especially as I did it at 42. But it seems more of the "this is your steak days of salary/income, make hay while the sun shines!" thought, with some sexist old school mindsets thrown in. My wife went part time for seven years when the kids were teeny and it was universal praise for having our priorities right. Me part time, not so much...

 

[AnIntentionalRoad]

I think DW wishes she would have have told people she quit her job and wasn't working instead of retiring at 58. People start assuming she has extra money stashed around, when in fact everything is planned out. no extra cash. but that stigma thing is still there. People don't understand retirement until all their joints start hurting, and the young people at work start ignoring them, it seems. Best advice to prospective early retirees, keep your mouth shut and be that person of mystery.

I agree. Better to keep it to yourself. Keeps things simple.

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