"You'll Be Bored!!!"

[ExFlyBoy5]

OK...let me first say that this is more of a rant than a looking for advice thread...

Quick summation...I am 40 year dude that has 63 working days before I retire FOR GOOD. I think I did some good planning, LBYM, and all that goodness. You can find specifics on my financial standing in the "introduce yourself" thread, so I won't rehash this here.

Here's my problem. I have a family member that just can't it through his thick skull that I *can* and that I *will* retire in a few months and will be perfectly happy NOT HAVING A J*B EVER AGAIN!!! Of course, this isn't a 100% guarantee, but since I clocked in for my very first job at Little Caesar's Pizza years ago, I figured out that working straight SUCKS and I didn't want to do it for 30+ years. He is absolutely convinced that I will be bored out of my mind and will have to go find a j*b to occupy myself. Never mind the fact that I already have a nice long list of stuff I would like to do in retirement that will keep me very occupied for a significant amount of time. I wonder if his lack of money skills which resulted him retiring late in life (almost 70 years old in spite of a Lt Col pension!) is being shifted to me as jealousy. I also think he feels since I am a enlisted guy...there is NO way, I could be FIRE. Truth be told, I don't like this family member anyway, so it's very much inconsequential...but he's not the only one to have said it...and quite frankly it's annoying as hell.

I initially thought that most folks I know would be happy that I am able to RE, but I am getting much the opposite...and I do know much of it is jealousy. I have been very hesitant up until this point to have an "alternative story", but I think calling myself a consultant and running with that story sure would make things easier and the hating will stop!

Whew...sorry about that. Like I said, I am not really looking for advice per se, but I really needed to get this off my chest. Needless to say, there aren't too many people in my shoes that I can vent to...but there are lots on this forum!!!

 

[robnplunder]

Rant away! You will be bore ... NOT! Congrats!

 

[footenote]

Virtually no one I know has been happy that we're ER. Some of it has been covert jealousy and some of it has been very obvious like your family member.

As for his motivation, you have already pegged it: "...his lack of money skills which resulted him retiring late in life (almost 70 years old in spite of a Lt Col pension!) is being shifted to me as jealousy."

Congratulations on counting down just 63 more days. Well done. Don't sweat a cover story; once October rolls around, just wallow in your "nice long list of stuff" you are looking forward to enjoying. And remember: living well really is the best revenge.

 

[aaronc879]

Just tell people you're retired from the military with a military pension. That should be enough to explain how you're able to retire at your age. It shouldn't be a shock for a 40 year old to retire if they have a cola'd military/gov't pension. What shocks me is when people retire in their 40's with a cola'd pension and then start a new career. Why would you work when you don't need to?

 

[Chuckanut]

Bored? I wish I had time to be bored!

 

[ExFlyBoy5]

Just tell people you're retired from the military with a military pension. That should be enough to explain how you're able to retire at your age. It shouldn't be a shock for a 40 year old to retire if they have a cola'd military/gov't pension. What shocks me is when people retire in their 40's with a cola'd pension and then start a new career. Why would you work when you don't need to?

I think this is because there is very little education in the military (at least in the Air Force) about finances and money management. The fact is that many folks that enlist in the military do so because they don't have a means to go to college (this is NOT a generalization, just from experience) and don't have the background/education to see how the pension can indeed be a pathway to COMPLETE retirement. From day one of freedom from basic training, guys and gals are given a generous credit line to go buy "yesterday's technology at tomorrow's prices" at the BX/PX. It starts early and keeps on throughout the career. New strip? NEW CAR! Went TDY and made some money? Time for a 108" HDTV!!! It's a vicious circle that is hard to stop. I have endured years of abuse about my frugal ways...but guess what?!? Sure is good for me now! I have a good friend that is a LTC and is looking to retire in about a year...and he is FREAKING out about finding a job because he lives like he's a 3 star general. It's really quite sad.

I have heard that they are making the new guys (in the AF anyway) go through a basic finance class once they get to their first duty station. I am not sure what this involves though...I have to assume that with some of the sweet rides the youngins are cruising around in, it's nothing more than "Pay your bills to stay out of trouble!".

Thanks for letting me rant...it's a frustrating thing but I should have expected it. I have seen LOTS of examples here of it happening to the younger set.

 

[HFWR]

Still slaving away part-time, but many people ask "Won't you be bored?" when I tell them I'm hanging it up for good in next year or two.

My answer: "I've been bored before, but I've never considered w*rk to be the antidote."

Plus, I'm pretty good at entertaining myself.

 

[FIREd]

Thanks for letting me rant...it's a frustrating thing but I should have expected it. I have seen LOTS of examples here of it happening to the younger set.

Exactly. It comes with the territory.

 

[ExFlyBoy5]

Bored? I wish I had time to be bored!

Chuckanut...I love your sig line (A man of small but independent means). I saw a reference to it in another thread as well...best retirement line EVER!!!

 

[ExFlyBoy5]

Still slaving away part-time, but many people ask "Won't you be bored?" when I tell them I'm hanging it up for good in next year or two.

My answer: "I've been bored before, but I've never considered w*rk to be the antidote."

Plus, I'm pretty good at entertaining myself.

That's pretty good...I'll have to use that one!

 

[Andre1969]

My answer: "I've been bored before, but I've never considered w*rk to be the antidote."

I'm going to have to remember this, thank you! I'd usually respond with something like "Well I'm bored with w*rking anyway, so what's the difference?", but your way is a lot more catchy!

 

[friar1610]

Just tell people you're retired from the military with a military pension. That should be enough to explain how you're able to retire at your age. It shouldn't be a shock for a 40 year old to retire if they have a cola'd military/gov't pension. What shocks me is when people retire in their 40's with a cola'd pension and then start a new career. Why would you work when you don't need to?

Might not be quite that simple. For a single person, a cola'd military pension might be just fine. For a family, particularly if the military member retires as, say, an E-6 or E-7, I think it would be very, very difficult to get by on just the pension.

 

[DFA]

Might not be quite that simple. For a single person, a cola'd military pension might be just fine. For a family, particularly if the military member retires as, say, an E-6 or E-7, I think it would be very, very difficult to get by on just the pension.

This is true, I retired USAF in 1996, as an E-6 with 15K Cola'd pension including VA disability (had some issues early on) and still had to work an additional 18 years in IT to retire, DW is still working on 32 years military and 24 years Civil Service, but will be hanging it up in 14 months. I sometime feel that some think that all military people have 40K to 100K pensions, most don't have more than 20K. I know it is better than nothing, but most of the time you can't live on it.

As for the OP's rant, I list myself as an Executive Consultant and no one asks if I am bored, just have to avoid the head hunters looking for IT Consultants, I get emails almost daily, when the call or email me I ask what the job is paying and than tell them that is not enough and to have a great day.

 

[Which Roger]

We are different. A certain personality type is drawn to ER. The majority of the population is not like that, and probably would feel lost and bored without a lot of structure in their lives, and a j*b provides that structure.

 

[razztazz]

I sometime feel that some think that all military people have 40K to 100K pensions, most don't have more than 20K. I know it is better than nothing, but most of the time you can't live on it.

Thank You. I'm glad somebody said it. I usually hold my tongue on these matters lest I sound like "sour grapes" on one end or advocating for getting "grabby"/or playing the poor-me violin on the other.

 

[aaronc879]

Might not be quite that simple. For a single person, a cola'd military pension might be just fine. For a family, particularly if the military member retires as, say, an E-6 or E-7, I think it would be very, very difficult to get by on just the pension.

Presumably they would've saved 10%+ of their income for at least 15 years prior to retirement. A single person or someone with a working spouse shouldn't have to work anymore once they start their pension. If they are married with dependent children and their spouse doesn't work then I could see them needing additional income. An E-6 retiring today with barely 20 years would have their pension start at just over $22K/yr. Any officer who puts in 20 years should be able to retire on their pension kids or no kids.

 

[ExFlyBoy5]

Presumably they would've saved 10%+ of their income for at least 15 years prior to retirement. A single person or someone with a working spouse shouldn't have to work anymore once they start their pension. If they are married with dependent children and their spouse doesn't work then I could see them needing additional income. An E-6 retiring today with barely 20 years would have their pension start at just over $22K/yr. Any officer who puts in 20 years should be able to retire on their pension kids or no kids.

Don't get me wrong...my situation is out of the ordinary. For *most* people, retiring as a enlisted guy on the pension only would be almost impossible. However, given the right circumstances (and training as I eluded to earlier) it can be done. Of course, once you add in kiddos, college for the kids, a wife who may not work..well, these are all variables that are, well, just that..variables. If I had not saved like a mad man, I would be VERY hesitant to retire as an enlisted guy. But between the generous pension, some good dividend stocks, no debt, LBYM and a wife that plays along...I will be getting along fabulously. Well...until Congress decides that us "working age" retirees have it too good and we get screwed on benefits...but that's a WHOLE 'NOTHER TOPIC!

 

[DFA]

Presumably they would've saved 10%+ of their income for at least 15 years prior to retirement. A single person or someone with a working spouse shouldn't have to work anymore once they start their pension. If they are married with dependent children and their spouse doesn't work then I could see them needing additional income. An E-6 retiring today with barely 20 years would have their pension start at just over $22K/yr. Any officer who puts in 20 years should be able to retire on their pension kids or no kids.

Very true, I did not save enough when I was in, and there was no TSP or 401k at the time for forced savings. Also you need to consider that a 22k pension would be reduced by taxes, medical insurance since VA mostly covers service connected issue and needs to bill your insurance for anything else. I know my insurance gets billed a lot from the VA and the VA does not take TRICARE insurance.

Sorry for being off topic.

 

[ChicagoGal]

I have a family member that just can't it through his thick skull that I *can* and that I *will* retire in a few months and will be perfectly happy NOT HAVING A J*B EVER AGAIN!!!

In my case, that family member is my father. I told him I was planning to retire in the next 5 years (around age 57) and he just doesn't understand it. He has accepted that I'm serious, but every conversation we've had about it has him suggesting new careers I can start to make money.

In this case, I think his concern is twofold. 1) He sold his business and retired about 7 years ago (at age 70) and probably still regrets it. He's used to running things and running the condo association just doesn't cut it. He loves being around people, and misses all that social stimulation. 2) We don't talk about money in specifics, so he probably truly is worried that I won't have enough money. While I do live in a big house and like rather expensive travel (things he can easily see), I live very frugally in just about every other area of life. (He keeps wanting me to talk to "his guy" for investing -- I keep demurring!)

So it seems that he truly is concerned for me, but through his lens, not mine. I'll get him to come around And in the meantime, he does have some great advice for the areas of retirement that I would like his opinion on!

 

[Chuckanut]

Before I retired I already had people trying to talk me out of it with the 'You will be bored' line of thinking. Some were also planning for me to go back to work part time - teaching at a community college, substitute teaching, working as a barrista. Others wanted me to commit to various volunteer activities that would have constrained my free time almost as much as work does. All this 'advice' despite the fact that I had not yet enjoyed even one day of retirement.

Why these people think they need to run my life is beyond me.

 

[ExFlyBoy5]

In my case, that family member is my father. I told him I was planning to retire in the next 5 years (around age 57) and he just doesn't understand it. He has accepted that I'm serious, but every conversation we've had about it has him suggesting new careers I can start to make money.

In this case, I think his concern is twofold. 1) He sold his business and retired about 7 years ago (at age 70) and probably still regrets it. He's used to running things and running the condo association just doesn't cut it. He loves being around people, and misses all that social stimulation. 2) We don't talk about money in specifics, so he probably truly is worried that I won't have enough money. While I do live in a big house and like rather expensive travel (things he can easily see), I live very frugally in just about every other area of life. (He keeps wanting me to talk to "his guy" for investing -- I keep demurring!)

So it seems that he truly is concerned for me, but through his lens, not mine. I'll get him to come around And in the meantime, he does have some great advice for the areas of retirement that I would like his opinion on!

It's kinda funny...my Grandad (really, he's my father since he raised me and my actual father is MIA) owned his own business and was successful with it. He closed up shop when he was 62 and he has told me repeatedly that the only regret he has in life was that he didn't retire much earlier. In relative terms, he did (and continues to have) a good retirement, but I think he would have liked to do more with his DW that wasn't in very good health for several years before her passing a couple of years ago. I suspect that he could have retired 15 years earlier...but his generation was a glass-empty in regards to money. He's absolutely ecstatic at me being FIRE, so we get along pretty well.

 

[walkinwood]

You've done something you've dreamed of and planned for - why worry what anyone else says? Tell them the truth & if they can't handle it, find new friends.

My friends on the whole have been very supportive. They occasionally express envy(eg. on a Sunday night), but in a nice way & are happy for us. DW's parents initially were aghast, but once we explained that we had thought it through, they accepted it - though I still get the occasional "are you going back to work?" question. I don't see any malice in the question. I don't make any effort to associate with a person who cannot accept what we're doing.

Life is too short. That's the reason we ER. It is also too short to have negative people in your life. If they can't be positive about your dreams after suitable explanation, leave them behind.

 

[ExFlyBoy5]

You've done something you've dreamed of and planned for - why worry what anyone else says? Tell them the truth & if they can't handle it, find new friends.

My friends on the whole have been very supportive. They occasionally express jealousy (eg. on a Sunday night), but in a nice way & are happy for us. DW's parents initially were aghast, but once we explained that we had thought it through, they accepted it - though I still get the occasional "are you going back to work?" question. I don't see any malice in the question. I don't make any effort to associate with a person who cannot accept what we're doing.

Life is too short. That's the reason we ER. It is also too short to have negative people in your life. If they can't be positive about your dreams after suitable explanation, leave them behind.

Actually, I have very few "true friends" and most of them are overwhelmingly supportive even if they harass me about it. I have found that the same tight group of friends I had in school continue to be my best friends today. The BIGGEST culprit(s) have been the one family member (who I would LOVE to disown!) and a couple of co-w*rkers that I could really give a royal flush about.

 

[marko]

To borrow the phrase from the movie "Princess Bride":
..." I don't think that word (bored) means what you think it does..."

 

[6miths]

I'm going to have to remember this, thank you! I'd usually respond with something like "Well I'm bored with w*rking anyway, so what's the difference?", but your way is a lot more catchy!

Yes I'll have to remember this too. Work could certainly be said to be sometimes 'exciting' but not the kind of excitement that is conducive to a long and healthy life in the opinion of many.