Asking about ethnicity?

[ERD50]

Originally Posted by ERD50 View Post
For me, it isn't about thinking they wouldn't like it, or that it doesn't show appreciation (for/of what?).

Got it. You don't care if they wouldn't like it.
.... .

For some reason, you are putting words in my mouth. You've 'got' something, not sure what it is, but I don't want it.

No, he didn't say that he wouldn't care if they didn't like it. He said that wasn't the main reason he wouldn't ask that question of a person.

It really helps to extend yourself, and make an attempt to understand where the other person is coming from, even if you don't share their point of view. In fact, thinking about it, it's especially important if you don't share their point of view.

Thanks Major Tom, that's it exactly.

-ERD50

 

[joeea]

Since the Northern Mariana Islands is a U.S. Commonwealth, the same as Puerto Rico, it doesn't seem like a scam to mark their products as made in the USA.

I suppose it depends on why you want "Made in the USA" labels in the first place, and what you want such a label to indicate.

Simple label, not so simple answer.

 

[Winemaker]

Agree. I tend to be pretty much colorblind. A jerk is a jerk regardless of gender, color, origin, etc. Where this gets you into trouble these days is that everyone seems to think it is vitally important that you acknowledge that people are different colors, speak different languages, come from different places, eat different foods, pray to different gods. Mostly, I could care less so long as you are not an *******. This tends to get me in trouble for some reason.

+10 We are all the same, yet different. But don't wear your difference on your sleeve or in blinking lights on your forehead.

 

[msanniee]

Well said.

 

[joeea]

+10 We are all the same, yet different. But don't wear your difference on your sleeve or in blinking lights on your forehead.

Hide your difference!

 

[The HalfBreed]

What would you say if they told you, "I'm Native American Indian"
Where are YOU From

See how that works out...

 

[catii]

Happened to me. DW & I were traveling in Mexico some years ago. I'm very fluent in Spanish, & happened to be tanned to the consistency of old leather (which I'm still paying for, years later). We had just finished a meal, & the waitress said that she couldn't quite place my accent, then asked which state I was from. I answered, "Arizona," & she shook her head, "No, no, which state of Mexico are you from?" I had to show her my driver's license before she'd believe that I'm from Los Estados Unidos, & we had a good laugh. I guess things weren't quite as PC, back then,

 

[ERD50]

What would you say if they told you, "I'm Native American Indian"
Where are YOU From

See how that works out...

Why wouldn't that work out? Why couldn't you each share an interesting conversation about your individual backgrounds?


As a side note to all this, while our ancestry can make for some interesting conversation, it also strikes me as almost totally meaningless as well. I guess the reason we can find it interesting, is because we need to focus our thoughts, we can't know everything about everything. So maybe we focus a little more on what we are told is our heritage? And then we can discuss that with someone who focuses on their heritage? In a way, maybe no different from discussing different hobbies with someone - you can each learn a little.

But beyond that, is there any reason for anyone to be "proud" (or "ashamed" for that matter) of having ancestors from any particular latitude/longitude co-ordinate on the map? Does that in anyway define who we are? It seems rather random and silly, but that's OK if we have some fun with it.

And if you are adopted, and don't know - does that make you less interesting, or less of a person? Certainly not. So why the big deal? As a 'small deal', for entertainment/education, it seems fine. I just can't see making a big deal of it.

Just my 2 cents,

-ERD50

 

[brewer12345]

Hide your difference!

That is not the message. The message is being a decent, contributing member of society who is decent to get along with is far more important than the other stuff. The differences might be an interesting point of conversation/cultural exchange, but it isn't the primary thing. YMMV.

 

[nancyfrank232]

As a side note to all this, while our ancestry can make for some interesting conversation, it also strikes me as almost totally meaningless as well.

I agree

 

[jjuneau]

These days some folks apparently want to be offended by almost anything. I suspect that most people still enjoy sharing about themselves, their family, their heritage, etc. Sad that some cultural “leaders” have created this sense of impropriety.

 

[dirtbiker]

These days some folks apparently want to be offended by almost anything. I suspect that most people still enjoy sharing about themselves, their family, their heritage, etc. Sad that some cultural “leaders” have created this sense of impropriety.

My thoughts exactly. I'm still astonished at how many people here seem so offended at the thought of asking about where someone is from.

 

[Amethyst]

Now I'm confused. I thought the OP was about asking people's ethnicity...which is not the same as asking where you are from.

Sheesh, the first thing anyone asks on a group tour is "Where are you from?" They want to know what state (if you're American) or (if not U.S.) what country. Then they make some comment about that state or nation - they've been there, or they know someone from there, etc.

Me, personally, I like to ask new acquaintances, "So, what do you do for fun?"

My thoughts exactly. I'm still astonished at how many people here seem so offended at the thought of asking about where someone is from.

 

[nancyfrank232]

These days some folks apparently want to be offended by almost anything. I suspect that most people still enjoy sharing about themselves, their family, their heritage, etc. Sad that some cultural “leaders” have created this sense of impropriety.

My thoughts exactly. I'm still astonished at how many people here seem so offended at the thought of asking about where someone is from.

I’m just curious what others find interesting about another person’s ethnicity

Honestly wondering. What do you guys find interesting about another person’s ethnicity?

 

[Nemo2]

Honestly wondering. What do you guys find interesting about another person’s ethnicity?

From my/our perspective it's not the ethnicity, per se, it's the "How did you get from A to B?".

This applies equally to a young Irish pilot flying in Botswana to get his hours in; a Chinese couple we shared a few lunches with aboard ship, (they started in China, emigrated to Chicago where he became an engineer...she worked in a Chinese restaurant to put him through school); the young Kenyan kid I mentioned previously who ended up in Toronto; a Vietnamese couple, long term residents of Houston whom we've met up with (and still remain in contact with) on at least three trips with the same Spanish line; an 80 year old Kiwi who still ran triathlons and lived half the year in France.

Etc, etc.

It's about people, and you don't learn about them unless you talk to them.

 

[brewer12345]

I’m just curious what others find interesting about another person’s ethnicity

Honestly wondering. What do you guys find interesting about another person’s ethnicity?

Personally, I have greatly benefitted by exposure to different cultures on a personal level. This isn't the same as ethnicity so I am cheating a bit.

 

[jollystomper]

What would you say if they told you, "I'm Native American Indian"
Where are YOU From

See how that works out...

Funny, this situation happened to DW and I while touring the Grand Canyon. It worked out great - again, because of the context of the situation. We wanted to learn, and they were happy to teach.

 

[ugeauxgirl]

These days some folks apparently want to be offended by almost anything. I suspect that most people still enjoy sharing about themselves, their family, their heritage, etc. Sad that some cultural “leaders” have created this sense of impropriety.

+1. I'm very curious and probably ask questions that others wouldn't, but I have had such interesting conversations as a result.

One of my favorite compliments ever was when someone mistook me for a French citizen while I was working in France as a student in college. I'm glad he asked!

 

[ugeauxgirl]

From my/our perspective it's not the ethnicity, per se, it's the "How did you get from A to B?".

This applies equally to a young Irish pilot flying in Botswana to get his hours in; a Chinese couple we shared a few lunches with aboard ship, (they started in China, emigrated to Chicago where he became an engineer...she worked in a Chinese restaurant to put him through school); the young Kenyan kid I mentioned previously who ended up in Toronto; a Vietnamese couple, long term residents of Houston whom we've met up with (and still remain in contact with) on at least three trips with the same Spanish line; an 80 year old Kiwi who still ran triathlons and lived half the year in France.

Etc, etc.

It's about people, and you don't learn about them unless you talk to them.

+1. People have such interesting stories to tell! It's one of my favorite things about traveling!

 

[mountainsoft]

I’m just curious what others find interesting about another person’s ethnicity

I'm hesitant to get back in this discussion, but for me it's not so much about ethnicity as it is something new. Someone may interest me because of their accent or a physical trait. I don't care if they're white, black, blue, or purple, it's something new that interests me.

I wouldn't ask the average white, black, or Latino where they're from or what their ethnicity is because I'm around them every day. Ho-hum, same old, same old. But new people and cultures fascinate me and I would like to learn more. These aren't people I'm likely to see again, so it's not like I'm going to develop a friendship where information will slowly be volunteered over time. I've got maybe five minutes to get to know more about a person I find interesting, and maybe learn something about their culture I didn't know before.

I really hate that this discussion has turned into a racial thing. Just because you see a person with different skin doesn't mean you treat them any differently. If you had three guys in a room, all the same age, all the same build, all the same accent, all the same clothes, but one of the guys is black, you would obviously identify the black person by his skin color. That's what differentiates him from the others. He's no better or worse, that's just what makes him unique. It could be two black guys and a black woman, two Latinos and an Asian, etc. Maybe it's three black guys, but one has an English accent. Three white girls, one has blue eyes. Three kids, one is overweight. Three white girls, one has tattoos. You'll notice whatever trait makes that person special. But heaven forbid you acknowledge their difference because you might offend someone. Sheesh.

 

[Chuckanut]

I’m just curious what others find interesting about another person’s ethnicity

Honestly wondering. What do you guys find interesting about another person’s ethnicity?

Why wouldn't it be interesting? It's part of who we are.

 

[PointBreeze]

+1 Some things are none of your business. Given that historically people have been discriminated against for ethnic and racial reasons, seeking to identify those characteristics opens that person up to potential poor treatment, whether you realize it or not.

+1
Our curiosity, no matter how innocent, does not trump what a person of color goes through on a daily basis in many countries.

I often share your curiosity - as an extrovert I want to get to know the people I meet - but friends who have been discriminated against all their lives due to the color of their skin have taught me a lot....

 

[dirtbiker]

Now I'm confused. I thought the OP was about asking people's ethnicity...which is not the same as asking where you are from.

Sheesh, the first thing anyone asks on a group tour is "Where are you from?" They want to know what state (if you're American) or (if not U.S.) what country. Then they make some comment about that state or nation - they've been there, or they know someone from there, etc.

Me, personally, I like to ask new acquaintances, "So, what do you do for fun?"

I misspoke. It was late when I typed that.

And that's also my first question usually for new acquaintances as well.

I’m just curious what others find interesting about another person’s ethnicity

Honestly wondering. What do you guys find interesting about another person’s ethnicity?

People are interesting. What makes us different is interesting. Our individual backgrounds are interesting.

 

[dirtbiker]

+1
Our curiosity, no matter how innocent, does not trump what a person of color goes through on a daily basis in many countries.

I often share your curiosity - as an extrovert I want to get to know the people I meet - but friends who have been discriminated against all their lives due to the color of their skin have taught me a lot....

So how does asking about one's ethnicity, etc. promote discrimination? If they're already being discriminated against due to the color of their skin, why would asking their ethnicity change anything?

And you specifically mention people of color. What about someone who is caucasian? By your statement above, it is implicit that it is less okay to ask a person of color rather than a caucasian. That sets artificial barriers based on skin color. How is this not inherently promoting discrimination?

 

[Cattusbabe]

I will answer your question from the perspective of a non-white person who was married to a white person. The general consensus on this thread is to not ask.

Excellent. From my perspective and that of most non-whites questions like that from a stranger are at the least annoying, at worst they are insulting. Not going to drop the "R" word in here but it can be seen that way. So why go there? It is just not worth it for the limited information that you will receive. I mean why does it even matter? It is just not a good look.

Oh, and we non-white folks do talk negatively about people who insist on asking intrusive questions like that. It ain't pretty either. So again just don't go there.

Random non-white people are not here to satisfy anyone's curiosity. Just mark them down as human and continue on with whatever interaction you are having.

The reason that I identified myself as non-white married to a white person at the beginning of my reply is to put on the table not to ask about that either. It is also annoying bordering on insulting. As a stranger, you really do not need to know how we got together and how we navigate our lives. Again mixed couples are not here to satisfy anyone's curiosity.