AJ, welcome to the board...I think.
Hold off trading insults for a minute and take a step back to look at the situation if you would. Look at how you titled your thread. You asked for "holes" and got shelled. Don't get mad, ask why others (most of who have many, many more years of investing experience than you) are recommending a different direction, lower expectations, etc.
While you are at it, I would request both you and those responding to you keep it civil. I suspect few on this board have ever seen a haystack, so using that term and calling people ignorant might not be the best way to solicit advice...which is why you are here, right?