Buying in a rural county as an older family

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Safire

Recycles dryer sheets
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We're both 50+, I have some health conditions, he is healthier (*knock on wood*). This is our first home purchase (despite our ages). Our son (older teen with autism) is quite significantly impacted and will live with us for the rest of our lives.

The home we're looking to buy is in a very rural area. In fact, the county can be described as rural, mostly farming community. The nearest police station and fire station are both 5 miles away, the nearest hospital is about 12 miles away. They just got a new big box store opened about 10.5 miles away. The village is literally a one-road area, there is one pharmacy and that's it. There are no libraries or grocery or other shops around. You'd need to drive 10 miles away for both. The school district will bus my son about 15 miles away to another town for services. For other services and services post school age (23, here), will be 20 miles away.

On the plus side, the home is new and affordable. There is lots of greenery, rolling hills and ponds. Young families unable to afford the urban area are moving in and so far a few dozen families live there, mostly those with elementary school aged kids. I love this town because I grew up in a very rural area but it was a different town and a different place!

However, I want to be practical. The nearest town where I can get services for my son is 20 miles away, and the nearest Big City is 35 miles away.

Would you do this as an older couple, one of whom has health challenges (controlled so far)? Is there anything we should be considering that we're not thinking of, so far? Please advice.
 
It soulds like the area you are targeting is growing. If it grows fast enough and large enough the services you need may spring up closer to the home you are considering, giving you the best of both worlds. But there is no way to know how quickly this will happen - if it happens at all.

How often do you expect to use those services you mentioned? How much driving are you willing to do for them?

The money you save by buying in your target area may end up being spent traveling to obtain those services, so the home may not be as affordable as it first appears.

I would not want to live so far away from sevices I know I need, or will expect to need in the near future. But this is a lifestyle choice only you can make.
 
I would be cautious about this given your situation. Beyond the distance to the hospital I would look into its services, capabilties and quality. Rural areas often struggle for medical personnel and the hospitals can't afford the best stuff. It all sounds esoteric until your in a real emergency.

My wife is alive today because when a real emergency hit the local hospital had a full fledged ICU and we were close enough to a major city (London) that they could get her onto a really advanced treatment in a matter of hours. Hospitals in smaller/less well off areas would have had a different outcome ... and this was the NHS where things are a bit more even than the US.
 
Is the Fire Station also an EMT/Ambulance dispatch site? That's important to me, to know how quickly an EMT is at the house if we call 911. So, 5 miles in a rural area - how long is that in travel time?
 
In rural area that we live those miles from the services you are talking about are relatively close for rural area here. In fact, most rural people live a lot farther than what you are talking about.

I guess it really is what you want and I for one wouldn't let that location you are interested in be a huge thing. You are closer to services than a ton of people in rural America.

Good Luck and I wish you the best.
 
Everyone has a different perspective, but what you describe doesn't sound all that rural, and I wouldn't call it impractical. I'm in my 60's, nearest library, firehouse and police are about 5 miles away, nearest hospital is 15 miles, nearest rescue squad is 4 miles, any decent grocery store is 12 miles. I've never felt that any of this was impractical, and the rescue squad probably did save my life once. However, I have no health issues to consider, so I can't offer any direct advice. But there are some elderly people on my road and I'm not aware of anyone not getting emergency services quick enough when needed.
 
We live in a rural setting similar to what OP is considering. In our late 60's. 5 miles to nearest town, 12 miles to bigger town with small hospital and a couple big box stores. Works great for us because we don't have needs that require us to get goods and services quickly. We can wait and get whatever we need once a week if we want to. We've lived in this rural neighborhood for 40 years and never have needed an ambulance, police, or fire call.

But I understand that some folks have urgent needs for goods/services. My advice to OP would be to analyze how often that you would need to travel to town for your son, your DR visits, etc. And weigh the hassle of these trips vs advantages of living in the country. This will help you to arrive at an answer.
 
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We lived in an area very much like you describe for several years. Besides the inconveniences, the farm smells were much worse when we left than when we moved in due to a change in what the farms were producing.

We were only there about 6 years, before we wanted convenience again and to be able to breathe air that was free of manure and fertilizer.

Our gasoline bills and wear and tear on our vehicles (and associated costs) were reduced dramatically after we moved closer to everyday conveniences again. Our car insurance rates were also lower after we moved due to a reduction in annual miles travelled. Our use of time became much more efficient after we moved back closer to civilization.

Here's one example. One time a few days before Christmas, I needed one more receptacle to complete a rewiring project. It was very warm out for wintertime and there was a light rain. Off to the nearest hardware store I went. Instead of a 10 minute round trip, it was closer to a 40 minute round trip. On the way back, on the winding, narrow, two lane road with no shoulder, a pickup truck was coming the opposite direction and started to lose control around one of the curves. By the time we were side by side, he was half in my lane and continuing to slide. I got over as far as I could in my lane without running off into a 10" drop off at the edge of the road. It's a miracle we didn't collide. After he passed, I looked in my rearview mirror and he continued to slide, then hit a ditch on one the side road, overcorrected and went up a bank on the opposite side of the road and rolled over. The truck came to rest on its roof in the middle of the road blocking both narrow lanes. I called it in and it took between 15 and 20 minutes for EMS to arrive. A simple trip for a common item almost turned into a life altering experience. The moral of the story is the more time you spend in the car traveling, especially on narrow winding roads, the more chance there is for disaster to strike.

One other consideration, prices in stores tend to be higher when there's no competition nearby.

The neighbors at our rural location were all very nice and accepting and we'd help each other out anytime. However, on the other hand, everyone always had their nose in everybody else's business with lots of gossip to fill their time.
 
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As mentioned above, consider travel time and not miles as you contemplate how isolated you may think you are....

5 Miles Rural is 5 minutes......5 miles city can be 30 minutes.

We live in a rural area and the rural hospital is 2 miles (2 minutes) away (with a helicopter pad if needed) and the medium sized city hospital is 30 miles (30 minutes away) and a top ranked hospital in the USA is 105 miles (1.5 hours away).....

When we lived in suburbs, the nearest ER/hospital was 30 minutes away in regular traffic or perhaps 60 minutes or more in rush hour.

It's not as big a deal as we thought....thus far.....And the county (EMS) knows where we are and it's not the first rodeo for them....And I'd put our rural longevity rate up against an urban longevity rate anytime.

Good luck figuring out if it will work for you....The house/value/land is quite a bonus.
 
We spilt our time half in a medium sized city, half in a rural mountain community. Mountain community is not a town but a small subdivision with a security patrol, fire department, lodge with restaurant, bar, snowmobile and sxs rentals. DW and I are members of our volunteer fire dept. We are 30 miles but about 1 hour to larger towns with hospitals, etc. For medical emergencies our fire dept. responds with a couple EMT's and medical responders who live up here. If needed we call in a helicopter for medical transport.
Our fire dept. medical responders are on site within 2 minutes or less of receiving a 911 call. That's actually quicker than at our city condo.
I enjoy our mountain cabin much more than the city condo but that's where family and grandchildren live.
Visit with your local fire dept. and see what their response times are and what emergency medical services they can provide.
 
There's rural and there's rural. I think DW and I live in a similar environment to that you describe, which is more exurban than rural with a big city 35 miles away. It's not western North Dakota. (Although people live their entire lives happily in places like N.Dak.)

We've lived where we're at for 35 years, so we know the ropes pretty well. Since you can get around on rural highways much faster than in town, errands aren't really a big deal. Emergency services are indeed less elaborate. My personal opinion: If you really need an ambulance or fire truck NOW, it's going to arrive too late anyway, no matter where you are. I knew two men who suffered major heart attacks in the city, and both had been anoxic so long by the time help arrived that they were never the same. It would have been kinder to just let them go.

On the upside, environmental stress is lower in the country. That could be a boon to an autistic person. From my perspective, I seldom have to wait in line for anything. I have come to appreciate that a lot.

One caution is that the community you're considering may be undergoing significant change with people moving in. That can create tension between the "been here" and the "came here" factions. "Been heres" resent the new folks, even though they probably sold the land to the newbies to build on. The existing gene pool can be shallow, with old-line families all related in one way or another (that doesn't necessarily mean they like each other).

Also, zoning in rural areas can be relatively lax. Industrial-scale farming is common now, and living near a hog farm or feedlot can be unpleasant. And it's not just the smell -- operations like that produce a lot of heavy vehicle traffic.

Just a few thoughts.
 
Small town rural life inconveniences aren't as much as an issue as some may think. Just like Graybeard addressed. The services, response calls, where you do your trading at, are all your neighbors and who we all know. The small things you may give up not living in a city are small compared to the positives living not in a big city.

Living right next to a hospital doesn't mean you will get there in time anyway. To me health care is always a thing blown out of proportion when comparing the places to live.

Here we can fly for 35$ to a major city with all the medical services a man can ask for and fly home the same day. The air ambulances are a big deal, and we have local people in this rural area that fly air ambulances. Fire trucks are located all through the area at ranches for quick response times. They are ready to roll at any giving minute of each day and don't travel from a town or city at first call for a fire.
 
Echoing what some others have said, the distances you describe don't seem problematic. DW and I live a life of extremes in terms of living arrangement - we have a home in a mega-city, and a semi-rural, small town weekend place a couple hours away. Over time weekend place has become the primary home and we plan to downsize the mega-city presence to a small peid-a-terre.

Anyhow, we've been gradually shifting to the rural situation. Our tiny town doesn't even have a traffic light. It's got a gas station and a small convenience store. But, we like the location because most of the things we could need or want (restaurants, taverns, groceries, medical offices) are a 15-20 minute drive, supermarkets and big box stores are 20-30 minutes away. This has been just fine for us.

In terms of healthcare it's been a mixed bag. There's an UrgentCare location 15 minutes away, and a small hospital with an emergency room about 20 minutes away, but our opinion of the small hospital is not great - neighbors joke that if you've got anything worse than a cut or scrape, you'd better keep driving, and that's been our experience too. To get to a large full-scale hospital we have to drive at least 45 minutes, and the mega-city large-scale medical centers (where we'd want to have any surgeries or complex procedures), would be 90 minutes, so not ideal. For emergency, our town has volunteer EMT/Fire, but I wouldn't place a lot of faith in them to show up quickly. Professional EMT would be 15-20 minutes away in one of the larger towns.

All-in-all, it's a trade-off. In the mega-city, we live close enough to fire stations and hospitals that sirens are a normal background noise. Shopping, restaurants, food, drink, all practically just outside our door or a short walk. Convenient, but with that comes a lot of noise and nuisance - and we've grown tired of it.

Out in the country place, neighbors wave to each other, people stop to help each other, the natural beauty is spectacular, and there is actually an abundance of social activity if you look for it. Now, like someone else said of their place, ours is not truly rural - it just looks rural. Sure, there's farms and cow pasture and horses and dirt roads and stuff, but there's also a lot of well-heeled retirees and second home owners (hence it ain't too cheap). I love the blend of city culture meets rural culture and feel I can breath so much easier in this environment.

So, YMMV, my experience may not translate to the community you're looking at. If I were you, my biggest concern would be your son and how well he might adapt to a different way of life, and also how well that community might be willing to adapt to him.
 
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Oh and you mentioned first home purchase. Make sure you know what you're getting into in terms of maintenance and upkeep. Feels like we spend a small fortune on a small army for landscaping, maintenance, pool, etc. As we age, DIY doesn't work so well. Our city home is more or less a really big apartment with a little bit of deck and garden space I can easily handle myself. With the rural place the exterior requires constant attention/upkeep and the critters and the elements make for a constant battle to properly maintain the property.
 
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The wildcard is what happens with your son when parents cannot provide any longer?

I am thinking that more options exist in less-rural area(s). But that is just a guess on my part.

This is happening with my brother and his child right now. At 75 they can no longer hanlde the needs of severely autistic child, and she moved in to a facility in the city.

So the frequency of services and how distant would be my first concern.
 
As you can see rural comes with lots of layers..


Since you are older and have a special needs child, my question would be, What would happen when one of you is gone. IOW could this be your forever home. I'm guessing due to your son, location, yard and home upkeep and the like, the answer is probably no.



You are not going to have a lot in common with young families with young children. So social contact might be an issue. If you are a church going family that could open up some common contacts. Don't underestimate how difficult it might be to find people to connect with.



Good luck deciding what to do, buying, selling and moving is pretty costly, so hopefully you can come to a decision for your family.
 
How will this move impact potential plans for your son as you age? There may come a time when you are no longer able to care for him at home yourselves. Are there group homes or facilities he could live in nearby? Are the services they offer compatible with what he needs?

Many of my relatives live in very small rural areas. When my Grandma was alive and we visited, there was one grocery store, a couple gas stations, Dollar General and a few restaurants. One small hospital, but they gave great care (Grandma got ill one time we were there--as a nurse, I sure evaluated her care when we were there!)
It was a very friendly town, everyone knew everyone else (and knew who we were when we came).

Rural areas can offer many things, just as larger cities can.
It all depends on what you want and value.

Best of luck in your decision making.
 
target2019 said:
The wildcard is what happens with your son when parents cannot provide any longer?

I am thinking that more options exist in less-rural area(s). But that is just a guess on my part.

This is happening with my brother and his child right now. At 75 they can no longer hanlde the needs of severely autistic child, and she moved in to a facility in the city.

So the frequency of services and how distant would be my first concern.
Click to expand...

My thoughts as well.
 
As I grow I don’t want to live far from services for many reasons and I don’t have a child who will require my care for the rest of my life. So, I would be very careful if I were you.

Have you set up an ABLE account to provide funds for future care for your son? An ABLE account is like a taxed advantaged college savings plan for young people who will require more care even as they age. But check it out first. There are certain restrictions.
 
Safire said:
... Would you do this as an older couple, one of whom has health challenges (controlled so far)? Is there anything we should be considering that we're not thinking of, so far? Please advice.
Click to expand...
SGOTI really isn't in a position to know enough about you and your circumstances to give you a yes/no.

As far as what to be thinking about (and speaking from a 76YO perspective), the one thing we all do is to assume that life as it is now will continue with no major surprises. Sorry to say it won't.

What will happen if neither you nor DH can drive any more? Can your son drive you? Himself?

Is your candidate house at least somewhat suitable for a temporarily or permanently handicapped occupant? We just built a lake home (long story there) that is relentlessly all on one level including the attached garage floor and the entry sidewalks both on the same level as the house floor. All doorways are 36" wide and the one stairway to the guest suite over the garage is also 36" to leave plenty of room for a chair-type stair elevator. The walk-in shower has no sill and features both a conventional shower and a hand-type shower that will work well for a person sitting on a bath chair?

How about that EMT/Fire situation? Are these volunteer services, which can be very slow getting on the road, unlike full-time city services. In a pinch will at least one of the three of you be able to drive an injured or sick person to the hospital?

Outside maintenance? The day will come (if it has not already) where you need to hire the outside work done. Are services available? Since you are in a young development will there be neighborhood teens who can help?

How reliable is the electrical power? Does it get cold enough in winter that you should consider a backup generator?

Will you be on city water and sewer or will you face the joys of your own water well and septic system?

Lots of stuff to weigh, the most important of which is probably the suitability of the house design for your 75YO selves. No one can tell you what the answer to your question should be, but the more what-ifs you consider the more likely you will be comfortable with your decision. Good luck!
 
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We retired to a rural county. Health care access and quality are a major issue and after 15+ years we are planning to unwind this decision.
 
jebmke said:
We retired to a rural county. Health care access and quality are a major issue and after 15+ years we are planning to unwind this decision.
Click to expand...

This can be serious.

Our cabin where we spend a month or two each year in summer has a hospital in the nearest town 12 miles away.

Over the last 5 decades we've used it a few times for injuries.

Recently they have closed the emergency dept of the 1,500 bed hospital, so now it's a 50 mile drive to the nearest one.

I'm planning to have emergencies when we are not there ;) :(
 
we are ~20 minutes from a Level III Trauma center, and a helicopter ride away from Seattle's Level I's.
We might opt for the additional medevac insurance.
 
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