Cost of Cremation

[ivinsfan]

I'm curious about any real world experiences posters might have in regards to the cost of a cremation.


A kind of casual friend (someone I have interacted with for over 40 years) lost her DH in early 21.


I was talking in a casual setting with her and the subject of her loss and some of things she has been through came up. In an offhand remark she mentioned the local monopoly funeral home charged her 10K to cremate her spouse.


I didn't want to probe for details but I'm wondering if just a cremation could possibly cost 10K or if the package with cremation costs 10K either number seems kind of high..or are the local guys upcharging to offset not making money on a casket?


My DH is a vet and we plan to use a veterans cemetery an hour or so away for our cremains when the time comes does know how that works IRT costs.?

 

[Dash man]

We’ve had three cremations over the past two years in three different states. We averaged a little over $4k for the cremation, urn and death certificates. One was buried with her husband, so about about $3k for opening the grave and the service. One was interred in a granite pedestal which she will share with her husband. The pedestal was about $8k and another$4k for miscellaneous charges for opening, engraving, service. The third only added $400 for an urn, and the parents haven’t decided what to do with it yet.
It’s not cheap.
For VA you get the columbarium free of charge. I believe you pay for everything else.

 

[Souschef]

That is outrageous! It costs $1500-2K for cremation. But she may also have had a special urn and a memorial service at the facility.
When my wife passed away here on the West Coast, I called the cemetery back East where she had a family plot. I asked what the cost would be to inter her ashes with her parents.
By the time they added up the urn, the vault, digging the site and covering it, it was well over $2K! And that did not include the cost of me flying back there.

 

[ivinsfan]

Thanks for that Sous..she sad they charged me 10K for the cremation, didn't say for the funeral. It was during heavy Covid times and they had a private family service by invitation only and a small boxed lunch.



I was just trying to wrap my head around how a cremation and small family service could cost 10K.

 

[old medic]

are the local guys upcharging to offset not making money on a casket?

My stepfather was cremated following an elaborate ceremony... Overall cost was close to 10K and that was over 20 years ago. They said that the casket itself was also burnt... Funny we didn't get the ornate handle and hardware back with his ashes... got a strange look when i asked about them.
MIL prearranged her funeral and burial... spent over 20K about 6 years ago, not including the plot. Funeral Homes seem to try and squeeze any penny they can out. We have looked into prearrange cremation services and cost was $1400- $3500 between the local providers... Thats just pick up the body, cardboard box and go pick up the ashes in a plastic bag. No service or even an obituary.
About 7 years ago, A good camping friend of ours passed without any family. We stepped in to do what we could, and found a cremation for $900. But as a Vet we got the VA to take and bury him in a VA cemetery at $0 cost.
I would check in with the VA and see about making arrangements
We have agreed that we dont want any big service.. We want a weekend long cookout/party here at the house, camping available, and folks to drop by, hang out, tell stories and celebrate...

 

[aaronc879]

Sounds like your friend got ripped off. I just looked it up for the place by me and it says $695-$1395 for cremation services. Ten grand is extortion. I know some people will say cremation costs whatever someone is willing to pay for it but anyone who charges $10K should be put out of business. Sickening.

 

[ivinsfan]

We’ve had three cremations over the past two years in three different states. We averaged a little over $4k for the cremation, urn and death certificates. One was buried with her husband, so about about $3k for opening the grave and the service. One was interred in a granite pedestal which she will share with her husband. The pedestal was about $8k and another$4k for miscellaneous charges for opening, engraving, service. The third only added $400 for an urn, and the parents haven’t decided what to do with it yet.
It’s not cheap.
For VA you get the columbarium free of charge. I believe you pay for everything else.

Well it sound ghoulish but I guess I need to figure out if there is anyway to get cremated without involving the local funeral home. They will definitely do an internment honoring type ceremony at the VA cemetery I'm have attended them myself. So my DH can think about if he wants something local in addition to that.

 

[ivinsfan]

Sounds like your friend got ripped off. I just looked it up for the place by me and it says $695-$1395 for cremation services. Ten grand is extortion. I know some people will say cremation costs whatever someone is willing to pay for it but anyone who charges $10K should be put out of business. Sickening.

Now I'm guessing that the cost of the entire thing was around 10K but I'm thinking that the local place is padding everything else to makeup for the fact they didn't sell a big fancy casket.




Caskets have always had a huge profit margin for funeral homes.

 

[Lakedog]

It's been a few years (2009), but my Dad's cremation was just under $900 in Florida. His cremains were spread off the coast so the only additional cost was for a charter boat for a couple of hours.

 

[REWahoo]

Well it sound ghoulish but I guess I need to figure out if there is anyway to get cremated without involving the local funeral home. They will definitely do and internment honoring type ceremony at the VA cemetery I'm have attended them myself. So my DH can think about if he wants something local in addition to that.

We're planning on using Neptune Society for cremation and avoid the cost of a traditional funeral home. They aren't everywhere but have 60 locations around the US and claim to be the largest provider of affordable cremation services in the nation. They do work with the VA.

 

[Koolau]

If I understand it correctly, there should be no need for a casket OR embalming in most jurisdictions provided cremation takes place within about 24 hours. IOW if you do not plan a "showing" the costs should primarily be transportation to the crematoria and any urn you might choose plus actual cremation. Sister and BIL both had plastic "containers" instead of urns. The cost was modest as I recall. I hand carried the ashes to the crypt where they were stored. One of the more costly items was "opening" the crypt (a box on a wall) and placing lettering on the crypt. All in all, it's a racket, but apparently well protected by laws and opacity of the profession.

If you have the time, up front, I would suggest investigation of cost pre-need. 10K or anything close to that seems out of line. YMMV

 

[braumeister]

Both my parents had "direct cremations" at their request.
That means taken straight from the deathbed to the crematorium (I think they require some sort of cardboard casket), then the ashes were given to me in a plastic bag inside a small simple cardboard box, along with a few death certificates. They wanted me to scatter their ashes in a particular place, so that's all I needed -- no urn required.

Both were handled by reputable local funeral homes.

My father in 1996 cost a bit over $1,700 and the VA reimbursed $760.

My mother in 2012 cost a bit over $2,300.

 

[braumeister]

I think there are also a number of possible choices in the urn department.

 

[Dash man]

We're planning on using Neptune Society for cremation and avoid the cost of a traditional funeral home. They aren't everywhere but have 60 locations around the US and claim to be the largest provider of affordable cremation services in the nation. They do work with the VA.

My mother used the Neptune Society and they really upset me. I never got to say goodbye. They pick up the body at the hospital and that’s it. Not good if you have family.

 

[ivinsfan]

I think there are also a number of possible choices in the urn department.

Brau I've seen them in big plastic red and white fishing bobbers...

 

[Winemaker]

^^
A distant cousin of my wife passed and wished her ashes to be buried with her parents. We stood at graveside when the hearse brought the ashes up the long driveway of the cemetery. The driver got out, the preacher began a hymn, the driver pulled out a cardboard box out of the back of the hearse and handed it to the funeral director. He opened the box, opened the plastic bag, and began dumping the ashes in the opened grave. A gust of wind kicked up and kinda blew the ashes into a dust devil; DW and I was aghast!

We had nothing to do with the arrangements but heard it was no more that $400.

 

[aja8888]

I've handled two cremations. One was my "ex" and one family member, both in the last 5 years. Big city here (Houston).

Called local facility, filled out online form. put in my CC number in the right box, and added the location of the body.

In ten days, received the Urn and 3 copies of the death certificate.

Cost for each one was $850.00.

Done.

Memorial service held later.

 

[Accidental Retiree]

Both my parents had "direct cremations" at their request.
That means taken straight from the deathbed to the crematorium (I think they require some sort of cardboard casket), then the ashes were given to me in a plastic bag inside a small simple cardboard box, along with a few death certificates. They wanted me to scatter their ashes in a particular place, so that's all I needed -- no urn required.

Both were handled by reputable local funeral homes.

My father in 1996 cost a bit over $1,700 and the VA reimbursed $760.

My mother in 2012 cost a bit over $2,300.

Mom had direct cremation in February 2012, Vancouver, WA. It was $750, which included a pretty cardboard scattering tube.

 

[Souschef]

I've handled two cremations. One was my "ex" and one family member, both in the last 5 years. Big city here (Houston).

Called local facility, filled out online form. put in my CC number in the right box, and added the location of the body.

In ten days, received the Urn and 3 copies of the death certificate.

Coat for each one was $850.00.

Done.

Memorial service held later.

3 copies may not be enough. It is cheaper to get them at the funeral than to request them later. Depending on how many accounts there are, you may need one for each account.

 

[W2R]

Sounds like your friend got ripped off. I just looked it up for the place by me and it says $695-$1395 for cremation services. Ten grand is extortion. I know some people will say cremation costs whatever someone is willing to pay for it but anyone who charges $10K should be put out of business. Sickening.

+1 Absolutely. I agree.

Now I'm wondering, what does local government do if some homeless person dies and nobody claims the body? I have no idea (none!) but who knows, maybe they'd cremate the body and bury the ashes in some sort of mass paupers' grave. For $0.00 .

 

[REWahoo]

My mother used the Neptune Society and they really upset me. I never got to say goodbye. They pick up the body at the hospital and that’s it. Not good if you have family.

I'm not understanding what they did to upset you. If your mother pre-arranged cremation with the Neptune Society, did they not follow her wishes? Did your family not have an opportunity to have a memorial service for her?

 

[aja8888]

3 copies may not be enough. It is cheaper to get them at the funeral than to request them later. Depending on how many accounts there are, you may need one for each account.

Anything you get from a funeral home has a huge markup. I recall when we contacted the FH to see what it would cost to handle the cremation, the estimate we several times what we eventually paid. Obtaining a few more death certificates can't cost that much more, although we didn't need to do that.

 

[pacergal]

My parents used Neptune also. It was wonderful.They had some wood urns in the closet, along with all of their paperwork. Both parents died at home, so we contacted Neptune and they came same day. Office called us with some questions about plans, and mailed the ashes a few weeks later. We dispersed them according to our parents wishes.
So simple.

When DH needed to bury both his Mom and older brother years ago, it was only a couple thousand, if even that.
I can't believe it would cost 10K just for the cremation! That must have included other things. If not, very bad business taking advantage.
I have Neptune in mind for us, but I have also been looking at some of the natural "pods", but haven't priced them yet.

 

[Dash man]

I'm not understanding what they did to upset you. If your mother pre-arranged cremation with the Neptune Society, did they not follow her wishes? Did your family not have an opportunity to have a memorial service for her?

She always tried to shelter us from anything she felt would upset us. Didn’t even consider us in making the arrangements, just had it done. Yes, it was her wish, but funerals aren’t for the deceased, they’re for the family.

 

[brett]

I've handled two cremations. One was my "ex" and one family member, both in the last 5 years. Big city here (Houston).

Called local facility, filled out online form. put in my CC number in the right box, and added the location of the body.

In ten days, received the Urn and 3 copies of the death certificate.

Coat for each one was $850.00.

Done.

Memorial service held later.

This mirrors our experience and cost. We had three or four death certificates. That proved to be enough since most institutions that we dealth with only wanted to copy the certificate, not retain it.

My parents both pre arranged their cremations and both left very clear instructions that they wanted the most basic arrangements. The funeral firm did walk me into the sales room to see the beautiful caskets and suggest a viewing, reception, service, etc. That lasted about 30 seconds until I told them what my parents express wishes were, including my mother with did not want a service of any kind.