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For only $1.99/minute, you can have all your deepest intellectual desires fulfilled.
Here are some of the gentlemen waiting for your call right now.
Carl enjoys discussing literature and philosophy.
Anton would like to discuss morality (and maybe, if you play your cards right, a little immorality, too.)
Philip enjoys talking about the way ontology recapitulates phylogony. (Philip is only 99 cents a minute.)
Call-1-900-BRAINEY. That's 1-900-272-4639. Call now. Operators are standing by.
(And yes, we know we spelled "brainy" wrong.)