No debt here either, but spent 7k total including the honeymoon (Poconos baby!), I hear the average is up to 20k for the wedding alone.
I would pass on to everyone the following observations we made before our wedding that were confirmed after it:
Flowers are way overrated. Get bouquets for the female half of the wedding party - done.
Centerpieces are easy to make yourself. Small fishbowl, fill with potpourri, cover with doily and ribbon - done. BONUS, people can actually see each other from across the table!
Gifts are a total waste. You ain't picking out a personalized gift for every single person at the party, why spend hundreds on half bottles of wine, little chocolates, etc.? Ask 10 people what they got as a parting gift at the last wedding they went to, you'll come up near empty.
Cut the list short. If you are paying, then Dad's business partner can pound sand. Work the business deal at the golf course! This is important to enforce even if the parent offers to pay for this guest, as you may get sized out of a venue you like. We had our reception in a 19th century schoolhouse on top of a hill with 3 private acres, sheep grazing on the hillside - maximum seating 74. Perfect.
One area I would splurge is pictures. We paid $1k for them and enjoy looking at the album to this day, almost a decade later.