In my 40s and this may be the year

[FireBob]

Hey just wanted to introduce myself. I'm Bob and this may be the year I take the plunge.



I never had a goal of ER since it didn't seem to be in the cards until a windfall set me up for the potential to be comfortable in retirement in my 70s. Then we had the market we did and I am in a position I never thought I would be. This has lead me into a deep dive into running the numbers and realizing I can walk away, but debating on if I should.



I worry my sudden desire to retire is part Covid burnout from staying at home and part my current NW sapping any motivation at work. It has definitely made me less tolerant of the workplace games and I find myself coasting now. I also think not having a goal of ER is messing with my head a bit now that I can. I set a somewhat arbitrary goal in my 50s sort of if I hit this dollar amount by 55 I would retire when I started seeing the large increases in my NW. At this point I could probably hit the number if I kept on the path I am, but I also wonder why since there was no real reason behind the goal.





I guess I am just struggling with deciding how much is enough above what I need and the fear of walking away from a job I can tolerate most of the time. There is also the fact it just feel so young to walk away so I worry it is all for the wrong reasons. It is a weird place to be in and also not really being able to discuss it with family and friends. I have had some bad experiences there with money so it is now a subject I avoid.

 

[Fielding]

I would have loved to retire in my 40s, personally. A lot of people here express satisfaction that they retired at a good time for them in their lives, but I would have been glad to go sooner than I did (early 50s, last year).

Assuming you are financially ready, the emotional readiness is personal and complicated. As far as I can tell, the large majority (80%+?) of people here are very happy they retired and say their worries largely evaporated once they finally were done. This goes hand in hand with the fact that the majority of participants here are careful thinkers, and correspondingly well prepared.

A windfall can change your perspective on retirement and working - it did mine. That's OK. You don't have to retire just because you can. You also don't have to keep working if you don't need the money. It's your decision.

If you'd like reassurance about your numbers I'm sure this forum would be glad to help you.

 

[casole]

Bob something you said jumped out at me it was

"At this point I could probably hit the number if I kept on the path I am, but I also wonder why since there was no real reason behind the goal."

I think that's your key to your ambivalent feelings. What would you like to retire to? You mentioned little patience for workplace games. Those are inevitable and unless completely toxic can be dealt with. What about your actual work. Do you enjoy it? Does it serve you? Are there other things unpaid that would serve you better? Is your work in line with your values? I'm not necessarily talking about changing the world or placing value judgments on whatever those choices are, if playing golf all day serves and fulfills you go for it. Or traveling the world or caregiving for your children or pets.

I'm going to read your post again because you said a lot, but those are my initial thoughts.

 

[pacergal]

Welcome to the forum!
Have you answered these questions:

Early Retirement & Financial Independence Community > Community Forums > Early Retirement FAQs
Some Important Questions to Answer Before Asking - Can I Retire?

If you have and are good to go, then it is up to you when you are actually mentally ready to retire.
Another good book is Ernie Zelinski "How to Retire Happy, Wild, and Free" It has a tree of life exercise that will get you thinking ou to the box for what you might/ can do in retirement to make your days rewarding/fun/ and what you want to to, not what others expect you to do.

 

[Out-to-Lunch]

Welcome to E-R.org!

 

[FireBob]

Bob something you said jumped out at me it was

"At this point I could probably hit the number if I kept on the path I am, but I also wonder why since there was no real reason behind the goal."

I think that's your key to your ambivalent feelings. What would you like to retire to? You mentioned little patience for workplace games. Those are inevitable and unless completely toxic can be dealt with. What about your actual work. Do you enjoy it? Does it serve you? Are there other things unpaid that would serve you better? Is your work in line with your values? I'm not necessarily talking about changing the world or placing value judgments on whatever those choices are, if playing golf all day serves and fulfills you go for it. Or traveling the world or caregiving for your children or pets.

I'm going to read your post again because you said a lot, but those are my initial thoughts.

The work is fine, but in no way meaningful. I used to enjoy what I did, but knowing I can walk away makes it feel I could enjoy my time better if I wasn't, even if I was just watching TV or reading a book. I find myself more and more annoyed with being asked to do things that aren't my job duties where before I was usually the person who would do whatever. Now I am like leave me alone that isn't my job.



Right now I work just to work since the money earned doesn't change my lifestyle any. Every year I work it is another maxed contribution to my 401k, HSA, and backdoor Roth and cheap insurance. I have always been frugal when it comes to spending and and currently 3-4% covers my salary, taxes, and healthcare.

 

[dvalley]

OMG! Bob, I could've written this post, 100% echoes my feelings lately -even your reply in post #6 above. I keep working because my kid is starting college and with the global uncertainty I don't want to be hasty and regret it.

 

[brydanger]

Im always so confused by these posts...
Its like a animal that's been trapped in a cage so long that when someone finally comes along and opens the door the dog is afraid to go outside.

"The work is fine" is no way to live ones life. Trust me.

You cannot know what lies outside your current lifestyle until you take steps in a different direction.
Go. Live. Adventure. Experience anything and everything you've ever been tempted to do and see and try...
then, if at the end of it all you finally run out of things to put on that list - then by all means take another job and relish in the enjoyment of someone telling you to do something that's not your job.

You can always decide to make more money.
YOU CANNOT BUY MORE TIME.

 

[disneysteve]

Im always so confused by these posts...
Its like a animal that's been trapped in a cage so long that when someone finally comes along and opens the door the dog is afraid to go outside.

Great analogy.


I'm certainly in the same boat as OP (though I'm well out of my 40s). When you've been doing essentially the same thing for the last 30 years, it is rather frightening to decide to just walk away and stop doing it, especially when that also means walking away from a steady pay check and having to live the rest of your days on whatever you've managed to put away thus far.


Reading all that everyone here shares is definitely helping me mentally prepare for leaving the cage.

 

[FlaGator]

The work is fine, but in no way meaningful. I used to enjoy what I did, but knowing I can walk away makes it feel I could enjoy my time better if I wasn't, even if I was just watching TV or reading a book. I find myself more and more annoyed with being asked to do things that aren't my job duties where before I was usually the person who would do whatever. Now I am like leave me alone that isn't my job.


Right now I work just to work since the money earned doesn't change my lifestyle any. Every year I work it is another maxed contribution to my 401k, HSA, and backdoor Roth and cheap insurance. I have always been frugal when it comes to spending and and currently 3-4% covers my salary, taxes, and healthcare.

The great part is you have options that many people do not, and an even smaller number don't have until they are many years older than you.

The complicated part is not "what will I do if I'm not working", it's "how important is my work in establishing my daily routine, the people I interact with, and the intellectual challenge of what I do".

Filling the day with meaningful/enjoyable activities is important. As previously mentioned, what you "retire to" is important.

Figure out what you do next. If you don't before you pull the plug, the easiest way to spend your time could well emerge, and it may not be the best for you long term mental and physical health.

 

[FireBob]

Im always so confused by these posts...
Its like a animal that's been trapped in a cage so long that when someone finally comes along and opens the door the dog is afraid to go outside.

"The work is fine" is no way to live ones life. Trust me.

You cannot know what lies outside your current lifestyle until you take steps in a different direction.
Go. Live. Adventure. Experience anything and everything you've ever been tempted to do and see and try...
then, if at the end of it all you finally run out of things to put on that list - then by all means take another job and relish in the enjoyment of someone telling you to do something that's not your job.

You can always decide to make more money.
YOU CANNOT BUY MORE TIME.

I don't disagree with the cage analogy, and it especially makes sense in my case. I didn't work my way up to this FIRE path so I don't have the lifestyle creep from significant salary jumps. My salary in no way reflects my current NW, but does reflect my lifestyle. I have always lived within my means and only splurged on a few things within reason since I learned at a young age not to carry debt so always kept my spending tight.

Trying to break out of the mindset has been a challenge and it has been easier just to ignore the money in the background other than to re-balance or reinvest.



I do get what you are saying and it is just a fight to get there mentally because even after all these years it still doesn't feel real. I worry about leaving my job because it pays well enough to be fine, but it isn't a career I could jump back into if I left. It is a job I worked up to and not one I have degrees to fall back on if I chose to return.

 

[casole]

Hi again FireBob,

Sounds like some more reflection and journaling are in order for you. May I suggest reading "Transitions" by William Bridges. There is an excellent chapter on Transition in the Work life that I just finished so it's fresh and still on my nightstand!! He states (and you and others are intuiting).

"the first task is to let go. After that you encounter the neutral zone, that apparently empty in between time, when under the surface of the organizational situation or invisibly inside you, the transformation is going on. Everything feels as though it is up for grabs and you don't know quite who you are or how you're supposed to behave, so this feel like a meaninglessness time. But it is actually a very important time. "

He poses some introspective questions to spend time journaling with. I look forward to hearing more about your path.

 

[yakers]

Wrong thread

 

[Bee4]

Bob,
Money in and money out. Decide on the budget you are happy to live on and work it back from there. Given the volatile new world order, a rule of thumb is to have cash on hand or close to it to cover 5 yrs of your costs. Then you can relax over the market volatility, and even have money to go in to buy low.

 

[kgtest]

Bob,
Money in and money out. Decide on the budget you are happy to live on and work it back from there. Given the volatile new world order, a rule of thumb is to have cash on hand or close to it to cover 5 yrs of your costs. Then you can relax over the market volatility, and even have money to go in to buy low.

Especially in a market like this year. Having that year worth of cash so you can wait to sell equities on the market high's is definitely the most optimal strategy. I feel bad for anyone that has to sell near these levels.

 

[Helen]

I feel bad for anyone that has to sell near these levels.

These levels are still excellent if you look back over the last decade. The market has been on a tear.