Mentally preparing for retirement

[Gumby]

I just read this terrific essay in The Atlantic by Arthur Brooks, the outgoing president of the American Enterprise Institute. In it, he tackles the question of moving from the achieving phase of life to the retiring phase, from building "resume virtues" to building "eulogy virtues". It may be helpful to address the necessary psychological shift that is often neglected in our myriad discussions here about nest eggs and safe withdrawal rates. It also speaks to the issue of why the one more year syndrome is so often not about money at all.

It's a long read, but worth the effort.

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2019/07/work-peak-professional-decline/590650/

 

[aja8888]

I just read this terrific essay in The Atlantic by Arthur Brooks, the outgoing president of the American Enterprise Institute. In it, he tackles the question of moving from the achieving phase of life to the retiring phase, from building "resume virtues" to building "eulogy virtues". It may be helpful to address the necessary psychological shift that is often neglected in our myriad discussions here about nest eggs and safe withdrawal rates. It also speaks to the issue of why the one more year syndrome is so often not about money at all.

It's a long read, but worth the effort.

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2019/07/work-peak-professional-decline/590650/

Thanks! Excellent article and I passed it along to my ROMEO group, some members of which still think they are in charge of something important at "work" (which is gone, of course).

 

[tulak]

Great article. Thank you for sharing.

 

[Sanstar]

Thanks for the article, Gumby. DH, who failed ER and is now caught in OMY syndrome, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

 

[W2R]

There's a famous quote sometimes attributed to Emerson, "“Life is a journey, not a destination.”

Being flexible and adaptable helps in fully appreciating life's journey. These are great skills to foster and then use when confronted with the many changes that life brings.

Thank goodness I did not get dragged down by One More Year Syndrome. I have enjoyed retired life so very much.

 

[skipro33]

My OMY syndrome was the opposite; I thought it dragged on and on and on. Longest year of my life! Wasn't sure I was gonna make it. A lot like one of my short tours in the military which are 12 months unaccompanied.

I never had a problem transitioning to retirement and feeling less essential than when I was working. You see, I have grand children. It's almost a god role. To their little eyes and hearts, I am the smartest, funniest, most patient person they have ever known. I enjoy teaching them how to do their homework or ride a motorcycle. I'm there to discuss girls with the grandsons and promise each of my little princesses that I will break any boy who makes them cry.

Best job I've ever had with the most sense of accomplishment that I've ever reached.

 

[Tiger8693]

I never had a problem transitioning to retirement and feeling less essential than when I was working. You see, I have grand children. It's almost a god role. To their little eyes and hearts, I am the smartest, funniest, most patient person they have ever known. I enjoy teaching them how to do their homework or ride a motorcycle. I'm there to discuss girls with the grandsons and promise each of my little princesses that I will break any boy who makes them cry.

Best job I've ever had with the most sense of accomplishment that I've ever reached.

This brought a tear to my eye, exactly how I feel with my (first, so far) Granddaughter! It is moving by at light speed.

 

[MarieIG]

Good article. I may go take a further look at those four stages.

 

[ls99]

Intersting article. Made me think, seems executive types have these sort of crises. Have not known any skilled trades (the blue collar bunch) to worry along these lines.

 

[MarieIG]

Intersting article. Made me think, seems executive types have these sort of crises. Have not known any skilled trades (the blue collar bunch) to worry along these lines.

It, ahem, can an issue with some. (There can be a bit of creativity, sense of accomplishment, identity - and even an adrenaline rush involved.) I have been stalking "Gumby" for his adjustment in light of what he did for a living, although I suspect that his preparation and almost simultaneous retirement with his YW will help smooth the transition.

 

[Cut-Throat]

These people clearly are NOT happy.

 

[Which Roger]

Intersting article. Made me think, seems executive types have these sort of crises. Have not known any skilled trades (the blue collar bunch) to worry along these lines.

I know someone who came from a skilled trade who when asked his plans for retirement, responded "get old and die".

 

[MarieIG]

I know someone who came from a skilled trade who when asked his plans for retirement, responded "get old and die".

Obviously a skilled tradesman/woman can have pride in their work. That can happen too with people whose social interaction is through work. One of my DH's co-workers retired - and then his wife died. He returned to work because he was lonely.

 

[kaneohe]

.............................................

It's a long read, but worth the effort.

.................................................................

both true.......thanks for posting .

 

[Scuba]

Great article, thanks for sharing. It reaffirmed for me that my retirement is on the right path. My relationships have deepened and expanded, as has my volunteer service with a local university. I’ve not missed work at all after over 2.5 years of ER.

 

[Dd852]

I thought this was terrific. I was pretty destabilized my first year not being a “big traveling big achieving big earning big status” mucky muck - there was a lot of “me” wrapped up in the job. Thankfully that phase was short and I quickly found I enjoyed my life and relationships much more when I was just me, without the big title, cloak and crown. I’m glad I learned this early enough in life to enjoy it!

 

[jollystomper]

I was a good article. I think the Bach example, and this quote, were the ones that I related to best:

No matter what our profession, as we age we can dedicate ourselves to sharing knowledge in some meaningful way.

In ym career I always took joy in sharing my knowledge, but the latter 5 years or so I worked I tied to make that a bigger part of my activities. For example, instead of leading projects, letting others lead them and being a faithful assistant/mentor, using my experience to help guide them. Even my last project, which I could had leveraged into at least another couple years of working, I chose to train others to take it over as soon as I retired.

I was fortunate in that I never under the illusion that my contributions would last forever... indeed that is one thing that got me more focused on ER. I wanted to retire looking forward at doing what I wanted, and not looking backward and worrying about my "glory days" were over.

 

[CDRE]

Thank you for sharing this well written essay. I had to look up Pando, had no clue.

 

[Tekward]

Your Peak is Earlier Than You Think

Long but interesting article. I really appreciated the Hindu teaching on 4 stages of life discussion:

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2019/07/work-peak-professional-decline/590650/

Many people of achievement suffer as they age, because they lose their abilities, gained over many years of hard work. Is this suffering inescapable, like a cosmic joke on the proud? Or is there a loophole somewhere—a way around the suffering?
Acharya answered elliptically, explaining an ancient Hindu teaching about the stages of life, or ashramas. The first is Brahmacharya, the period of youth and young adulthood dedicated to learning. The second is Grihastha, when a person builds a career, accumulates wealth, and creates a family. In this second stage, the philosophers find one of life’s most common traps: People become attached to earthly rewards—money, power, sex, prestige—and thus try to make this stage last a lifetime.
The antidote to these worldly temptations is Vanaprastha, the third ashrama, whose name comes from two Sanskrit words meaning “retiring” and “into the forest.” This is the stage, usually starting around age 50, in which we purposefully focus less on professional ambition, and become more and more devoted to spirituality, service, and wisdom. This doesn’t mean that you need to stop working when you turn 50—something few people can afford to do—only that your life goals should adjust.
Vanaprastha is a time for study and training for the last stage of life, Sannyasa, which should be totally dedicated to the fruits of enlightenment. In times past, some Hindu men would leave their family in old age, take holy vows, and spend the rest of their life at the feet of masters, praying and studying. Even if sitting in a cave at age 75 isn’t your ambition, the point should still be clear: As we age, we should resist the conventional lures of success in order to focus on more transcendentally important things.

 

[brett]

I waited about 18 months for a golden handshake. I was fortunate. I loved my job, I liked the people that I worked with, and my boss was located in another city several thousand miles away.

Waiting for the package was not hard I did begin to wonder 'if and when' It came suddenly. I was thrilled.

Made two calls. One to my spouse who said she had never heard me so happy over the phone. The second to the employment law lawyer that I had engaged to tell him the package was on its way to him for review.

Never looked back. Happy as a clam as they say. Zero regrets. I felt that I had won the lottery. Great job, enjoyed my work career, great employer, and a pension and a termination package to send me off.

After years in business I realized that anyone could be replaced, that the company would not go Chapter 11 post my departure, and that the company felt no loyalty to me whatsoever. To believe different was folly. And I was simply a cog in that big commercial wheel.

 

[Bklyn55]

I found the Atlantic article fascinating. I worked with several people who refused to retire and their decline was visible and sad to watch. Better to leave on a high note. Thanks for posting!