pushing out retirement to help kids with college

[Urchina]

There's a lot of good discussion here on college and leading for it. But I'm interested in the assumption that retiring is the only way to deal with your health issues.

A standing or treadmill desk, regular walk breaks at work, seeing if there are commuting options available and exploring stress-relieving methods that don't involve alcohol may address your work issues sufficiently so that another couple of years is doable. (And the alcohol issue is one worth dealing with right now, regardless. That's a choice you're making, not a mandatory response to work stress).

I'm sure there are many approaches that might improve your current life short of retiring early.

Btw, I have a degree in Environmental Science and now work a challenging and interesting job as a regulator. My parents helped with my state school expenses. Between that, scholarships and work I graduated without debt. It was one of the best gifts I could have gotten from them.

I teach at a community college as a side gig. I see how many of my most capable students struggle because they have little to no family support. Nearly all of my students work part-time. The ones who are really on their own face significant barriers to success.

 

[Philliefan33]

I teach at a community college as a side gig. I see how many of my most capable students struggle because they have little to no family support. Nearly all of my students work part-time. The ones who are really on their own face significant barriers to success.

I see this also with some of my young coworkers on the river. Those with parents who are unable or unwilling to support them after high school have a tough time. A little financial support combined with boundless emotional support can go a long way.

 

[sdawson]

To the OP if still listening.

We are in a similar (but not quite the same) boat. We have four daughters -- one in her 30s, two aged 21 and 22 currently in college, and a 13 year old. For this discussion the focus is on the 21 and 22 year old.

When they were graduating high school, we agreed that if they helped themselves in college by working and doing well, we would help them with their undergraduate degree. The arrangement we made was they would be responsible for 1/3rd of the expense (tuition,rent,food) and we would pick up 2/3rd. The deal was they had to be frugal (no cars, minimal eating out, etc.), as this was not a blank check.

As for background, I put myself through undergraduate and a masters on my own, as my parents loved me but could not afford to help. I am luckily in a bit better position so I want to help more. At the same time, I don't believe that a free ride is beneficial, they need to have some skin in the game.

This has worked out well, and both girls will graduate next spring. The older one will graduate from Oregon State with no debt. This is in part due to the fact that she took her first two years at the Commmunity College level (less expensive) and worked more to pay for college while taking a lighter, but longer road. The other will have about $14,000 in debt, as she went to Portland State for all 4 years, and both the college and cost of living wa more expensive there. I will point out that the debt is hers. We also were firm that while we will help financially, we will not co-sign any student loans. Both girls worked during college, and as we are unexceptional middle class, there were no scholarships, so the tuition/room/board is all on us.

Now, we also said that for graduate school (if they chose) they were on their own. My girls were grateful, and are fine with that. But as it turns out, they both are in fields which need a Masters or Doctorate (the older wants to be a physical therapist, the younger social work)

I will be 56 when they graduate next Spring, and we are set. My wife and I and our younger child, would be fine financially if I retired next Spring, which is the current plan.

HOWEVER, as I look at the costs of graduate school for the other two, I am weighing whether I should work for another year or two to help them. I would not even consider this, if they had been irresponsible in their undegraduate schooling, but they honestly have been pretty much perfect in their frugal life style and dedication to schooling.

This is a different boat than yours as 1) I am younger and 2) I dont' feel too much stress at work. The younger 1 is looking into 15 month Masters programs (about 32,000 dollars), while the older one will need to get accepted into a physical therapy program (difficult) and will need a minimum of 3 years and over 100,000 dollars to get through.

The good news is that they will not be in school at the same time. One will start immediately, the other will be delayed at least a year.

So I am considering offering up $1500/month to them to help them. $18,000 a year may make the difference. It would be 1/2 of the younger ones tuition, and perhaps 40% or so of the older ones. They still have to come up with room and board outside of that, as well as work or take on debt to complete the degrees. It is my understanding that for the physical therapy doctorate, one really doesn't have the time to work much outside the program, so that would be mostly debt.

So doing the math, that is a $72,000 commitment or about $100,000 before taxes.

So I am considering working a another year to two to bump up my retirement savings by another 100,000+ to do this.

-S

 

[albireo13]

Taking care of my health is something I've put on the back burner the last 2 years with helping my elderly parents and trhe demands of work.
It has become harder at work. Literally before I can turn on my computer in the morning people are in my office talking about the days priorities and what needs to be done. I used to walk at lunchtime but, now the trend is to schedule meetings over lunchtime and at evenings. I am often chewing on my lunch sandwich while a meeting drones on in the background.

I could blow off meetings but, my programming is to do what i can to help the project.
That plus as I get older more responsibility is "rewarded" me, which means more meetings and more documentation.


It's like a steady diet of addictive laxatives!!

 

[pb4uski]

So since you can't stand it why don't you just do something about it rather than just complain... tender your resignation or tell them that your job responsibilities need to be restructured if they want you to stay... they will continue to take full advantage of you as long as you continue to let them... sometimes in order to get what you want you need to be a prick.

 

[albireo13]

OK, I'll stop complaining LOL

 

[kcowan]

...When they were graduating high school, we agreed that if they helped themselves in college by working and doing well, we would help them with their undergraduate degree. The arrangement we made was they would be responsible for 1/3rd of the expense (tuition,rent,food) and we would pick up 2/3rd. The deal was they had to be frugal (no cars, minimal eating out, etc.), as this was not a blank check...

We did the same thing. It was 1/2 in our day and we sweetened the pot by offering half the cost of a used car when they graduated. Worked well. They both went to work and one returned to school for a Masters on his own dime.

 

[LightningDawg]

Still waiting on OP to rerun numbers after subtracting $60,000 from his balance and see what % success is...